Are You A Hunter?
October 4, 2008 
9 Comments
So many guys are all about hunting all the time.
Most guys have this mentality: they go out on a Friday night to a bar, they give it five minutes and decide that the bar’s no good. They say to each other, “let’s go to the next one, man,” and they end up CTN – chasing the night.
“Let’s go to the next one,” “let’s go to the next one,” they keep going and at the end of the night, they end up at home – by themselves. They’re alone, staring at the ceiling again and wondering if they missed out on meeting people at the bars they didn’t hit.
Here is an excerpt from a conversation that I had with a few of my clients at a recent bootcamp.
We just spent three hours at Whole Foods, and what did it feel like, guys?
Client: It felt like five minutes.
David: Yeah, it felt like five minutes. This brand new Whole Foods they just built is like a destination on its own – everyone is going there. We had new people coming in all the time. We must have talked to, like, 20 different people, easily. It was just endless people.
And one of the key things we did was with that old woman. This like 90-year-old woman in a wheelchair started petting Daphne and we totally made her day. And guess what? Other people noticed that, and you saw that other people approached us after that incident. We had created this really positive and welcoming energy.
So you don’t have to go hunting every night – you just have to find fertile ground. You can find those places and then just hang out.
Really, life is about just hanging out and having a good time.
We would have stayed in Whole Foods longer but we got kicked out – we were a group of 14 guys just hanging out and finally one of the managers came over because he knew exactly what we were doing! He basically told us he had no problem with us, but he just wanted us to disperse a little bit more.
So really, you could just hang out in one place all day long. You’re not going to be with 14 other guys, so you won’t get kicked out of the place – don’t worry about that. But you’ll really start to grow a little bit more because you’ll start to see things more – you’ll realize that you don’t have to chase life.
You don’t have to chase it, because it will come to you!
If you checked out yesterdays video you will see that it juts ends. Today I break down what happened and why.
Brings back memories.
The Eat where we had something to eat after going to Borough market and then the Tate Mordon.
All 16 of us gathered round those little tables eating and talking while the girls sat by the window kept looking at us. Hell they stopped talking to the guys they were with and did nothing but look at us the whole time.
Harvey nicks, that has to be the funniest moment of the whole boot camp. We split up into groups of 5 so as not to draw attention to our selves (like it was really going to work). We initially went in different directions but then when we found the directions to the men’s toilets all 16 of us headed straight there.
The shop assistants couldn’t believe their eyes, asked us who we were – Adam said that were a boy band in training and just like you girls we like to go to the toilet together. I was so desperate to go I nearly pissed my self when I heard what Adam said.
Whole foods on the Saturday night at closing time (when we meet up with the hen night girls who were at the table next to ours and didn’t pay any attention too) first we were invited to the wedding and then back to their place as long as you striped for them.
Sunday at Spitalfields market, we were having lunch everyone was looking at us and then the woman with the dog and all the single friends who couldn’t find any single guys approached Pradeep and asked him who we all were (I got the thing on my digital recorder). I can’t remember if I ever sorted out the problems the USA and Indonesia were having in our mini UN club.
The whole time during the boot camp we were there just having fun, talking to each other, being in the moment and things just happened.
“And one of the key things we did was with that old woman. This like 90-year-old woman in a wheelchair started petting Daphne and we totally made her day. And guess what? Other people noticed that, and you saw that other people approached us after that incident. We had created this really positive and welcoming energy.”
This captures the whole essence of it all. And makes me smile. Right on guys!
Word!
Too often the esence of genuine love for socializing gets lost in pick up.
Nice blog.
David,
You are my mentor! Life is so much more fun when we stay OUT of our heads(not losing common sense, of course) and pay more attention to whats going on around us. I’m finding that..as my observation skills get sharper I don’t need any canned pick up lines although, I never really used them. Your philosophies on socializing are right on the money!
Night game for me is absolutely one of the worst ways to meet women.
Want to go to a place with shitty music so loud you can’t talk, with little to observe except sexy skimpy dresses, where you inevitably spend lots of money on drink because you’re so bored and end up puking in your bathroom and sleep on the toilet floor?
Count me in!
While I’m (obviously) not a massive proponent of bars and clubs to meet women, I do enjoy going for a pint in the day time with a few friends.
Hi David,
I think your advice is great. Sometimes people chase, without knowing what they’re chasing. In which case, you can’t find what you want if you don’t know what it is.
http://www.datingwho.blogspot.com
I think guys should remember to have fun first.
No matter where they end up at night, whether it’s a bar, a club or a house party, the REAL party starts when THEY decide to make it a party.
And once they start having fun, the women start coming
What about you have no friends and the only thing to do on a friday night is go to a bar? Do you go Leykus 101 and wait at the bar until women approach, or just start talking to everyone around you? I’ve tried the second but people mostly want to hang in their groups and it is hard to “get into” the group.
interaction of paxil and general anastesia