Why You Should Never Make Assumptions (3 Reasons It Makes You an Ass)
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Look at the way the word assumption is written.
It starts off with an A and the next letter is an S. Think about it.
People who make assumptions are usually an ass.
I never understood why you should make assumptions about people when you could actually ask that person a question or get to know them on a real level.
I think we like to make assumptions because it makes us feel better about ourselves.
Here are three reasons why making assumptions really make you an ass:
1. Ass rule number one:
The other day I posted something on Facebook that was very personal to me. I had a moment that my daughter decided to call me my ex-wife’s boyfriend’s name. I’m sure, for those of you that are single dads or single moms, this has happened to you on a basis.
It’s the first time she ever called me him. She called me Mom before. My answer usually in that case is to:
Answer her back in a deep voice.
Or rearrange my bra, or just kind of comb my hair making funny hey, I’m actually a man and not a woman, to get her laughing.
I posted it on Facebook. I had comical remarks after it. I was not angry at all. I couldn’t be angry at a little six year old.
But yet people made assumptions that I was angry. They started internalizing it and sharing their stories, their triggers, and their anger.
I appreciated people reaching out because I’m all about feedback and comments and everything else. But I had to correct people, and I had to tell them stop making an assumption of how I feel. I clearly stated how I felt. I made sure that there were smiley faces, and I made sure that everybody knew that I found humor in this situation because I even wrote that. But yet people made assumptions that I was angry and started really sharing their experiences and their triggers through my thing, making assumptions.
2. Just because he has a BMW doesn’t mean he has money: assumption number two.
A friend of mine owns a business. It’s a small business. It’s doing okay, but it’s not making the money that he needs to make.
He drives a Porsche.
He ran a special on his business.
It was a good deal, one of those Black Friday deals. A woman missed it. He said, “I can’t offer it anymore because this is my business and I offered it, and you should have bought it during that time, and I have to honor when the sale was.”
Instead of her respecting that, she made an assumption. And the assumption was:
Oh, that’s funny coming from a guy who drives a Porsche. You just can’t give me a deal because you need to drive your Porsche?
He didn’t say a word. He just allowed her to vomit her negative assumption on him.
I said to him, you should have told her the truth.
That you spent the last two weeks debating whether or not to cut a check for $2,000 to trade your Porsche back into the Porsche dealership so you can go buy a cheap American car and save $400 a month.
But the assumption is: Just because somebody is driving an expensive car doesn’t mean that they have the money to drive that car.
Some people like to put themselves in financial debt by driving an expensive car, and other people once had money and now they’re on hard times and driving that car is because they have an obligation to the lease and to save their credit by keeping that car. But once again, people make assumptions. People make assumptions all day long about other people. Every BMW driver is an asshole. Mercedes guys are snobs.
Cars that are pieces of junk? The person must be white trash. I had a friend of mine one time who was richer than rich. He drove a 13-year-old Buick with faded paint. He could care less. He got out of the car in his ripped pants and ripped jeans. People looked at him like he was homeless, yet he had $17M saved. He just didn’t believe in showing it. Assumptions.
3. Next time you assume something instead of assuming, actually open your mouth and have a conversation.
Find out the answer from somebody instead of assuming the worst because usually an assumption is assuming the worst in somebody, which means in reality:
You’re an ass. People who make assumptions are asses. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve been an ass at times, and I’ve made assumptions but now I just try to take life for what it is and if I have a question, I ask instead of being an ass.
Nowadays, dating is more competitive than it’s ever been — download this free report to learn 6 proven skills to stand apart & succeed in the modern dating world.
1 Comments | Join the Discussion!
John
Saturday, January 14th, 2017