Your ex is onlineSo, you’ve heard your ex-boyfriend is online. What do you do? How do you react? Should you get in contact with him?

It’s something that before Facebook, Twitter, and all the online dating sites would never have been a problem. But we live in a society where everyone is so accessible. Most people are online in one capacity or another, so the chances are you will run into an old flame at some time. How you deal with it is what matters.

One day your friend calls you. “Guess who I saw online earlier?” she says. “I saw your ex! He’s on Facebook and he said he’s looking for a woman.”

Now you’re curious. You’re wondering what he’s up to. What does he look like now? What else does he have on his profile?

You might feel a mix of emotions when you see him back online and looking for love. You know you have no claim to him anymore. But it’s hard to see someone you loved and share intimacy with, putting themselves out there for other women. Here’s the thing…

Of course it’s weird being able to see your ex’s online dating journey, and yes it may even hurt a little, but it’s great he’s ready to date again. It shows he’s moving on. You should be doing the same. Ignore what you see online. Don’t go snooping, and don’t try finding out who he’s talking to. It doesn’t matter and it’s none of your business. More importantly, it doesn’t do anything for you.

It used to be you’d break up with someone, and you wouldn’t hear they’d started dating again until you heard it through the grapevine. No big deal, no fuss, and you wouldn’t need to see it. Sometimes you wouldn’t find out your ex was dating again, until you saw them out with their new woman. It’s that awkward moment we all have at some point in our life when you’re out with your new man, and you bump into your ex and his new girlfriend.

You’d just laugh about it and move on without giving it much thought. It was just a small moment in time. Now with the Internet you can sit there for hours staring into your ex-boyfriends new life. You have to resist the temptation. Don’t try to go back. Don’t romanticize the past. Embrace the fact he’s moving on. Wish them the best. Hope they find the love they’re looking for.

That’s all you can do. It’s part of being an adult. You can’t lay claim to someone just because you shared a relationship one time. You don’t have first refusal on them if they become single again. You have to get over your ex.  It’s beautiful they want to love on, and you’d be amazed how good it feels when you accept it, and wish them the best. Everyone deserves love, and you need to realize you won’t find love while you keep looking backwards.

If you see your ex online, say hi if you must, accept they’re your ex for a reason, and move on into the arms of your future. It’s the only way to go.