Sometimes I think, why am I even writing How To Fall In Love? Do you remember when you were younger? You just fell in love. You were so open, so fearless, so just lost. You didn’t have stories that blocked you, you didn’t have disappointments and lies. You didn’t have ex-wives or ex-husbands that drove you nuts.

You just did what came naturally, and that was falling in love. The very first time we all fell in love was pure, innocent, and absolutely spectacular. The rest of it is a mess… well not entirely, but here are three simple steps to fall in love.

  1. Each person you meet is a brand new person. Every time you get triggered, every time you think about the people who hurt you in the past is going to literally prevent that new person you knew from expanding and growing and loving one another. Each time you do that and don’t acknowledge that and get scared, you’re going to block the beautiful feeling of falling in love.
  2. You have to keep in mind that this is a new person, that everybody is viewer, created the story that you’re carrying forward right now in your life. It’s that story. You see love can’t happen when we’re in stories in the past, as a matter of fact, there’s no chance in hell that that was going to happen if we stay in stories from the past.

We’ve all been wounded, we’ve all been kicked in the pan, we’ve all been destroyed by somebody or something.

But love can’t happen if we are still staying in that story. Staying in the story of us being hurt, staying in the story of things will not work out, staying in the story of all men or all women are a certain way.

  1. You’d have no choice but to go in, there are no guarantees. In the love business, there is absolutely no guarantees that love will actually happen for you, but the only way that I know it will happen is if you actually go in head first, diving deep, blindly trusting, allowing, feeling, being authentic, being honest, being raw with one another and allowing and admitting what’s going on.

Otherwise, love will stand no choice because love will then be a story that was repeated from your past. The story that you can no longer — well, you can no longer be associated with.

Love needs to breathe. Love needs to grow. Love needs conversation. Love needs admittance. Love needs telling the other person how scared or how nervous you are.

Love has absolutely no judgement. If you’re going to fall in love, there has to be zero judgement from the other person.

Sure, the other person’s going to disappoint you, hurt you, not understand you at a moment, but realize they’re not doing that on purpose at all. They’re doing it to do what? To learn you, to understand you, to get closer to you. Love is one of the most beautiful things that we can experience as people, but the only way that we’re ever, ever going to experience real love, true love is to allow love to happen. If we block it, control it, manipulate it, and are not honest with ourselves, then love will never, ever happen for us.

I know it’s kind of scary. I know it takes a leap of faith, but if you truly want it, that’s the only recipe for love. Three simple steps. Do with it what you can.