Excite and Intrigue
There are no flaky people. Anywhere.
You think you have flaky people in Missouri, right? You have flaky people in Vegas? You have flaky people all over Southern California, right? And there are flaky people all over Jersey and New York, right? And in Arizona…
But here’s the thing about flaky people: they don’t exist. If someone flakes on you, it just means that they are not really that sure about you. They are just indecisive about if they are into you or not.
We all flake on people that we’re indecisive about. Do you know how many times I’ve been invited to a party or out to dinner with some people, and then at the last minute I realize that I really don’t want to go? And I bail out.
Does this make me a flaky person? No, it’s just because the people that were invited to the party just didn’t really intrigue me enough to want to go. It wasn’t worth my time to go.
Client: You said you were going to go in the first place?
David: Of course! We always accept those invitations before we think about it.
Client: Yeah, we all do that to a degree.
David: Right, and then later – at the last minute – we realize that the person that we’re going to go hang out with doesn’t really excite us, so why are we going to go give up one of our nights?
So when people bitch and complain about people being flaky in terms of dating and other things, I just tell them to let it go. You just didn’t excite them enough, and for once you’re on this end of the stick. More often you’re the one flaking on somebody.
If someone is truly excited about hanging out with you, they are not going to break the plans. If they do have to break the plans, they will say something to you like, “something at work just came up, can we do something tomorrow night?”
Khiem: And if you seem to be meeting constant flakes, well, then you just aren’t exciting or intriguing enough.