Punch the Clock By David Wygant

Hey guys. So I was at David DeAngelo’s Man Transformation Seminar last month, hanging out with a bunch of my buddies – some really amazing guys. It’s something so powerful to be in a room with 400 people that are just there with one goal in mind: to become more powerful, social men.

I was hanging out with my buddy Will, from New York – Will’s a cool, fun dating expert like myself. Will came up with something that I thought was one of the funniest analogies I’d ever heard. I’d like to claim it as my own, but I can’t, because he’s bigger than me and he’d absolutely kick my ass!

So we were talking one day about night game, and clubs and bars, and he said something that really struck a cord for me, one of the funniest things I think I’ve ever heard. He said that when most guys and most women go to a bar, it’s like punching the clock.

They get there at ten o’clock at night, the doorman looks at them and says, “20 bucks,” they go inside, they take their timecard and punch it in there. Four hours later they punch their timecard again, and they leave – just to say that they’ve been there. They do it just to say that they’ve gone out, just to say that they went out that Friday night.

This analogy is so true! So many people are not active participants in their own lives! They go to places that don’t really suit them. They go to bars, nightclubs, lounges – and they just go there and show up. They stand in the corner, they don’t say a word, and they suck down a few cocktails. They make one lame attempt to approach a man or woman during the course of the night, they get shot down and they don’t understand why.

They don’t understand why this happened, or how they could have been rejected, and they basically tell themselves, well, at least I went out and tried.

But you didn’t try. If you’re going to go there and punch the time clock, you’re not really trying. You’re basically no different than the people who have a job that they don’t like and they just go in there and punch the clock. You have to be an active participant in your life at all times.

So why don’t you try this little nightclub or bar approach next time, which works for both men and women. The next time you’re in a bar and you’re staring at someone who is staring at you, what do you do?

Let’s say you’re a guy, and you see a woman staring directly at you. What do you do? You walk directly over to her, the second she looks at you. You don’t hesitate, you don’t waste time, you don’t waste energy, and you don’t think to yourself. You walk directly over to her and you look directly into her eyes and you say, “were you checking me out?” and laugh. She’ll say something.

It doesn’t really matter what she says. She’ll most likely say, “yeah, I was checking you out,” or “naw, I wasn’t really checking you out.” And then you need to tease her and bust her a little bit and say, “you know what? I think you suffer from approach anxiety! I really do.”

She’ll start laughing a little bit, and then you’ll say, “now that I think you suffer from approach anxiety, I have a tip for you. There are some really cool ebooks on the internet to teach you how to get over this approach anxiety.”

So what happens is that you guys have a common thread. Usually, people in a bar suffer from the disease called “approach anxiety.” They also think that drinks help you overcome approach anxiety. All alcohol does is loosen you up so you can think about your approach anxiety even more!

So now you’re standing there and talking to her. Now what you can do is take all the people around you and bring them into the conversation. You can say, “alright, let’s pick out people in this room who have approach anxiety,” and then you start looking for people who also have approach anxiety.

You’re then picking out other people, so you’re having fun together. You can say, “oh man, that girl in the corner wearing blue – she definitely has approach anxiety,” and she’ll say, “oh yeah! That guy over there in the orange has approach anxiety!” You sit there and you’re talking about a subject you already know about.

So if you’re the guy or the girl who goes into a bar and punches the time clock, you’d better go into that bar, club, or lounge this weekend and you’d better not punch that clock. Have a conversation about approach anxiety.

Like I always tell you guys, talk about the subjects you already know about. If you stick the subjects you know about, you’ll have plenty of things to talk about.