be open and vulnerableBe a man.

There’s not enough of you around in today’s society. Be a man.

Here’s where we are in today’s modern world:

Disconnected, fearful, overanalyzed, and sometimes just plain old scared.

There’s more information available now than ever before. So much information that our minds get cluttered. So much information that we don’t even know what to do, feel, or think at all anymore.

So much information that we overanalyze every single move we make.

It used to be boy meets girl, boy pursues girl, boy adores girl, boy goes in 100%, and girl feels safe, vulnerable, and open to let go.

But nowadays, we don’t do any of that. We’re so looking for validation because we’ve been marketed validation to one another so much.

I Am…

But here’s where it’s going to stop. I’m going to give you the most powerful “I am” statement in love that you will ever make, because here’s what’s going to happen to you and I can predict your future.

You’re going to meet a woman.

You’re going to feel vulnerable.

She’s going to feel vulnerable.

She’s going to tell you something that she fears or she’s hesitant about or nervous.

About connecting with you.

And in another sentence she’s going to tell you that she really f@$!ing likes you and wants to get to know you. She’s going to flip-flop between both things because that’s the beauty of a woman. A woman will flip-flop with her emotions, one minute feeling something, the next minute feeling something else.

So what is a boy to do? What is a man to do in that situation? You just got validated and unvalidated in the exact same sentence. You literally don’t know what to do. You got validation that she liked you, but on the other hand she tells you that, well, she’s scared and may not want to do this.

And this is where the I am statement comes in.

This is when you need to say:

I am loved.

I am vulnerable to you.

And I am present and fearless and available to you.

That’s the only thing you can do, because you’re a man.

And a man takes a woman by the hands and a man leads her down a path and it is the path he has to lead. He has to cut through the forest, he has to kill the snakes, he has to get the boogeyman out of the way, and he has to do it without getting validation from her. You have to make her feel adored, you have to make her feel safe, and you have to step off that bridge and take the leap without getting validation and confirmation from her.

Don’t Wait for or Expect Validation

You have no choice at all. You’re the man. You can’t wait for her to confirm and validate everything, every step of the way, because what’s happening here is she is mirroring your fear. She’s mirroring your lifetime of being beaten up, of not letting go, in everything. She is mirroring it to a T.

So, if you meet a woman, someone who inspires you, someone who you find beautiful, different, and unique, you step up and you become a man. You don’t fear her words at all.

You take the jump over the bridge, you land in the water, you tread water, you do whatever it takes. You get NAKED and make yourself open, vulnerable to her, and you have no expectations. And if she chooses you after all that, then great. If not, then you continue on that path and you keep going. You don’t get heartbroken, you don’t get stuck. You don’t stop; you keep moving. Because in order for a woman to be vulnerable and open to you, you need to be vulnerable and open with zero expectations, no outcome, and be okay with it.

You have no choice. It’s the way the sexes are wired. It’s the reason why you’re learning all this stuff, so you can be a man.

I know how good it feels to be validated. You want to meet somebody and you want it to be the perfect Disney version, boy gets girl version.

You want her to be on the same page, like you, have no fears. Well let me f@$!ing tell you something: it never works that way unless you are that first. She’s going to throw words at you, she’s going to throw feelings at you.

She needs to feel safe. In order for her to feel safe, she needs to get all that fear out, and you need to be the man.

What Being a Man is All About

If you think the woman that you’re pursuing is the woman that you want to be with, then you need to be the man. You need to look at her and say I can take on whatever shit you’re going to bring up and I am going to be a rock, and I’m going to pursue you because I want you, I desire you, and I’m going to make sure during this process that, yes, you are the loving, adoring woman I need, but I understand that you may have fears, so I’m going to come at you 100 miles an hour and I’m going to show you that I want you over all the other women I was swiping or texting with before you came along.

It’s what being a man is all about. It’s what being vulnerable is all about. Every woman wants to feel adored, so it’s time you adored without necessarily getting it back on a validation level. It’s time to step into your manhood, to step into your vulnerability, and step into that power of who you are.

It’s scary, I know. Believe me. I meet somebody, I want it all to be birds and whistles and flowers and everything perfect. I get that feeling, I get that emotion.

It’s like who doesn’t want to be validated. But you need to step into it. And to step into that manhood means that you need to step into the being that you are. You need to step into and be okay with whatever happens.

Take this new beautiful woman by her hand and when she throws darts and bullets, they’re just words. Look at the words as rose petals. She’s trying to feel safe, and if she feels like you’re not vulnerable and you’re not open she’s not going to feel safe at all, and that’s your job as a man, to step into vulnerability first, so this beautiful woman can blossom right in front of you. I know you can do this.