How You Can Learn From My Relationship Mistakes
Three things you need to know.
First off, every relationship I’ve had was not a mistake.
But I knew that title would get you.
They were learning lessons that I needed to learn. They were experiences that I needed to have.
They were opportunities for me to grow. Opportunities for me to become the man that I am right now.
But I also tell you that if I knew back then what I know now, I probably would have never been with any of the people that I was ever with. I would have had totally different experiences in my life. But as we all know and as we all grow, we never get to that place in our life until we get there.
So, all the relationships, all the pain, all the agony, everything, was exactly how it was meant to be. Which gives you a beautiful chance to find what you want now.
I once picked a woman that was exactly like my mother. As a matter of fact, I picked a few women that were exactly like my mother without even realizing it.
I was with a woman who literally rationed out affection, like food was being rationed out. Like gas was being rationed out during the gas crisis. Like toilet paper used to be rationed out in eastern Europe during the days of the Soviet Union.
She just wasn’t affectionate. She thought she was affectionate, but she was not affectionate. She rationed it out to me. And I stayed in that relationship. And it was emotional abuse on my part, and it was emotional abuse on her part. We were playing something out together.
What what it was?
It was my mom. My mom used to ration affection because my mom was all about herself.
My mom had a lot of reasons to be about herself. She was clinically depressed for probably half of her of life. She was very loving at times, and then other times when I needed the love and affection and everything else, she never gave it. She would ration it out. And that’s fine, but it taught me that that’s what love is all about. That I don’t deserve love.
So, I was in that relationship and it was pure emotional abuse for me. It made me feel really lousy. And when I finally left that relationship, she still didn’t understand why I left.
She blamed it on other things. She blamed it me, she blamed it on this, but she never really saw how it was deeply affecting me on some levels. And that’s okay because as a man and a woman, we were not meant to be together.
This is something you don’t work out. It doesn’t take six years, or four years to get someone to be loving the way you need. It’s something you recognize in your partner immediately and it’s something you are either willing to do or not willing to do. And if your partner is communicating that to you, and you are not doing it, you’re rejecting them. But if you stay in that type of a relationship you’re basically telling the universe that this is the love that I deserve because of the programming that I have.
Which leads us to number two:
Figure our your damn programming finally.
You’re wasting your time if you’re dating right now and you do not understand what your past programming has done to you. You don’t understand why you react to certain things and why you keep picking the same person over and over again.
If you’re dating and thinking things will change because you have yet to tackle what happened to you as a kid, then nothing is going to change. You’re going to continue to date your mom or your dad.
Or your grandmother, or your grandfather. You’re going to be working on what in the self help field we call “incorrect survival programming.” And you’re going to play out this loop until the day you die… unless you actually understand why you’re doing what you doing.
The fact of the matter is, most of us are playing our old blueprints. And we are not playing our new blueprint.
We’re playing old beliefs, old patterns, and everything. We’re getting the love that we think we deserve instead of the love that we desire. So, that’s why. I have come up with something so powerful.
It’s the most powerful weekend workshop I’ve ever done, because it actually takes your old blueprint smashes it to pieces.
And we actually reprogram and put in a brand new blueprint so you actually can get the love that you deserve and desire. Instead of the love that you think you deserve and desire.
I’m running a special on it right now. You come, bring a friend that will support you and you’ll support them and this will be the best dating insurance every. There’s only one date I’m doing this, and it’s February 18-19 in Los Angeles. I strongly suggest you get your butt there if you really want to start finding love instead of searching for hope.