How many of you have been in a long-term relationship? Is the idea of monogamy monotony?

I remember a client of mine who came to a boot camp told me something I think a lot of people experience. He had just gone through a divorce after being married for seven years. I asked him when the marriage turned and he told me the marriage was only good during the fucking years.

“Those first three years when we were having sex. Otherwise, it was monotonous and terrible,” he said.

Ahh the fucking years.

This should be an old Mike & the Mechanics song. Remember that? I think the name of the song was “The Living Years.”

Well now there should be a song about relationships, the beginning years, and we should call it “The Sex Years” or “The Fucking Years or “The Screwing Years.”

Sexual Energetics and Choosing the Right Match

Relationships that lose the sexual drive lose everything.

Once you stop having sex, you stop connecting. Once you stop connecting, it just becomes a matter of time before that relationship goes to the pile with all the other relationships. So, how do you keep the sex alive?

It’s actually quite easy.

Keep the sex alive by picking the right person in the first place, someone who you think is hot and sexy. Someone who matches you energetically sexually.

I know that phrase right there might have thrown you for a big loop, so let’s explain it a little bit. Sexual energetics.

Have you ever been with somebody and no matter how hot they were and how attracted you were to them, the sex just wasn’t right? They move left, you wanted them to move right, they kissed a certain way, you wanted them to kiss the other way. They couldn’t really have a great orgasm with you, well you know the story.

Energetics and sex. Sex is an energy. Two people either fit together, mold together, grow together, be together, or they don’t.

It really is that simple.

Keeping the Sex Alive Throughout the Relationship

So, let’s say you picked right, and you did have great sex in the beginning.

Now it’s time to talk about the middle and the end, or maybe no end.

Knowing how to keep the sex alive is very important; it’s important for all aspects of your relationship.

To me, keeping the sex alive is really simple. You’re with somebody who you know. You’re with somebody whose buttons you know how to press, literally.

You need to know how to turn a woman on sexually. There are so many ways to keep the sex alive: role playing, dirty talk, having sex in different locations, going away on vacation together, taking some time away from the baby or the kids and having a night of just incredible sex.

Sex is important. If you’re one of those people who doesn’t think sex is important and says sex tends to waiver, I’m sure in a boring monotonous long-term relationship and your partner’s probably masturbating profusely to Internet porn and using sex toys behind your back.

Sex is a natural beautiful way to express ourselves, and it’s a great way to stay connected. Check out today’s video, where we talk about how to remain sexually connected to each other and keep the sex alive in every relationship, from the beginning to the middle to no end.