have a partyI went down to San Diego recently. My friend, Larry, invited me to two parties. I’m never a big party person. It’s not that I don’t like parties. I just, for some reason or another, never scored the invites to parties. Now, there are 3 types of party I get invited to, and I went to 2 of them this last trip.

The first party that I went to was a birthday party for this woman. It was very sweet, very mellow. It was 4:00 in the afternoon. Everybody sat around in an appreciation circle and just gave love to the birthday girl. Everybody said something or did something nice for her.

I found that really interesting. Definitely not my style of celebrating, but it was beautiful to watch all her friends show their appreciation and love for her on her birthday. So, birthday circles and appreciation circles are kind of cool now.
Afterwards, there was great conversation in the kitchen over gluten-free cake and gluten-free cupcakes. Yes, we do live in California. It’s the gluten-free state. The second party that I went to was an interesting one.

It was a mixed group of people at someone’s house. They decorated unbelievably. There was a room where people were dancing, full of neon lights. There was another area outside that had tents, but they were blanket tents, like you would’ve made when you were 12 years old.

There was one area you stood underneath which had things that looked like ‘Finding Nemo’ with neon lights. Then there was a screen, people danced behind listening to drum music. It was a really mellow party, and nobody was angry or pissed off. I realized this morning why. I barely saw anybody drinking alcohol. Most of the people either smoked a little bit of pot, or were just plain sober.

Connecting people based on being sober. There’s another thing I noticed about this party, too, because there was no alcohol energy. There was none of that — everybody looking at their phone every five minutes — vibe. In fact, most people were looking at each other, talking, connecting in the different rooms. It was a nice party because people were actually there to meet people.

They weren’t there to hide behind their telephone. There wasn’t that aggression that you get in the bars. Whenever you’re around a lot of alcohol, there’s a lot of aggression because people get frustrated, and take on a different personality under the influence of alcohol.

I always said, on the side of a bottle of booze, there should be this warning label:

“Consumption of too much of this beverage may cause you to turn into an asshole. Beware of personality disorders or changes.”

Or another label on the bottle of booze should say:

“Beware. You may get even more frustrated by your life than you already are. So violence may occur, and yelling and screaming.”

The third type of party, as I talked about, are the ones people go and they get inebriated. There’s always drama.

Women will get dramatic. Some text will come in and upset them. They’ll often text a guy that they’re seeing and the guy won’t text them back. There’s so much negative energy when alcohol is there. There’s always the group of guys that get into a fight with another group of guys, because something ridiculous happened.

But the second party I went to was really nice to go to a party. Everybody was just friendly and open. People introduced themselves. They were nice and sweet. People hugged each other hello, and hugged each other goodbye. It was good energy, and that’s what a party should be.

The party was interesting.  There were polyamorous couples. There were people were walking around in tribal outfits.  It was kind of bizarre.  I felt the most interesting person was ‘the goat whisperer’.  It was some guy who changed his name to some funky name.  Probably was named Bill, and turned his name into the Manifester.

He was like the goat whisperer.  He walked in there with a 4-year-old goat that had his back the whole time.  They were in-tune with each other, and the goat just lay down next to him, and watched everything like it was some kind of attack — it was a security goat.

Always at a party, is one person who’s different than everybody else, and this guy was definitely fascinating.  Once he redesigned yachts; now he’s the goat whisperer.  How do you go from like redesigning boats to keeping goats?

So here’s my advice…

The next time you get invited to a party, don’t make excuses not to go. Don’t hide away. Don’t miss the opportunity. Get out there and see who’s there. Not all parties are fueled by drugs and alcohol. Some parties you’ll meet some amazing interesting people. It’s great social practice and it’s the perfect cure for all your social anxieties!