How’s the extreme honesty going, folks?

Is everybody rolling along and being honest?

I’m having a great time with this extreme honesty month.  It’s been a lot of fun.

Last Sunday I was in the parking lot of the farmers’ market with a client of mine. As I was leaving, a guy in a black Saab cuts me off and flies into a parking space.

Being the New Yorker that I am, I of course raised my fist in the air. (I don’t know what that means—raising the fist in the air—you think to yourself, “Wow, I’m raising my fist in the air.  It means that I’m going to do what, exactly?”)

So black Saab guy jumps out and he says, “What are you doing man? You’re so aggressive with your car!”

I said, “What are you talking about?  Your girlfriend is a raving maniac and she flew into the spot.”

All of a sudden I looked at him and I listening to his voice carefully.  He was angry and pissed off. He had an accent. His girlfriend also jumped out of the car, angry.

I said, “Hey, you from New York?”


“No kidding man, my brother and I have got a business in Brooklyn.”

And just like that, we bonded.  His girlfriend, formerly feisty, was now bubbly and talkative.

I said to the guy, “She’s feisty, huh? That’s good. I like it.”

She said, “Yeah I’m a Jersey girl.”

“I love Jersey girls. I love hot-tempered women.  You’ve got to admit: most of the people in L.A., they’re probably stoned—they’ll let you cut them off and stuff like that.  You drove aggressive like I do. Good for you.”

We talked for 10 minutes and had a really good conversation.

I realized at that moment, that all the times I used to get really angry at people, pissed off, not doing a thing, not saying anything, I could have turned it around and had a great conversation like I did.

And I did it based on a commonality.  It felt really good to just say, “Hey, I’m an aggressive driver like that too. You just happened to cut me off before I probably would have cut you off.”

I admitted that to them.  They laughed, we laughed.

I realized that being really honest feels great on every level.

It’s not just talking to your boss.  It’s not just talking to your significant other.  It’s just letting it all out in all ways, shapes, and forms.

Every day this month I’ve had an episode like that.

Hell, somebody called me a douchebag in an e-mail.

I e-mailed back and said, “Thank you. At least I created an emotion in you.  I’m glad that I was the douchebag that made you write back.”

That’s exactly how I felt.

. . .

How are you guys doing with this?  

Are you really being honest?  

Comments have been good on the blog, but what changes are you guys doing in your life and what do you see?

Are you seeing changes in your life?  

Are you seeing new ways to look at things?