Twas the day before Thanksgiving, and all through the house, not a creature was stirring, not even a turkey.
Oh wait…wrong holiday.
This is it: Over the river and through the woods; To grandmother’s house we go!
Who wrote that annoying song anyway?
So today, one day before you are attacked by the parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles, friends, where they all are going to ask you this one big question:
Why are you still single? How come you didn’t bring anyone to Thanksgiving dinner?
So instead of the usual defensive mode you go into, I have a solution for you.
Today’s podcast will give you the exact reason why you are single this Thanksgiving.
Your answer to Granny, Mom and Dad, friends, and co workers, lies in today’s special holiday bonus one hour podcast.
It’s time to understand the importance of your journey. It’s time to embrace how how being single is the way to go.
And one last thing: Do not let Mom, Aunt Susie, or Grandma set you up on a date. They have no clue what you like in another person, and they did not listen to this podcast to understand why you are single and what you are looking for.
Is anyone else not freaked out at the look of that Turkey? I am guessing you picked the picture because it looks like women’s boobies… burnt sore ones at that?
You wern’t the only one who did a double take on that. I thought it was pretty hilarious.
I have to work Thanksgiving every year.
about self validation, sorry but I do need validation from others, I can’t get it from myself. that is why I am how I am, I need validation, that is what gives me confidence, I lack confidence because I lack validation from others.
about making someones day. I agree, I would be happy if a woman came up to me and complimented me. but, I can’t make someones day without getting something in return, can’t put so much effort to not see the woman again.
About eye contact, voice tone, etc. I have a low tone, and I don’t like to make eye contact due to my ptosis.
good podcast.
also about thanksgiving, I will not celebrate it tomorrow. I mean of course I’ll eat a thanksgiving dinner by myself, but the reason I won’t celebrate the actual holiday is because I can’t lie to myself, I’m not thankful.
Hey David. Thanks for taking the time to give us a one hour free podcast! I really enjoyed listening to it. As for Thanksgiving tomorrow, it is considered my favorite holiday and I will tell you why. My family from my dad’s side has a very special Thanksgiving tradition that we celebrate every year. Every year for Thanksgiving, we go to this country club and I meet family members that I only see once a year from my father’s side. My father mainly comes from a Swedish and Irish decent with a little German decent as well and we are planning to celebrate our 138th year Thanksgiving anniversary. It is considered to be the oldest Thanksgiving celebration in California and I am really proud to partake in such a long family history of celebrating this holiday. So Happy Thanksgiving to you all and hope you can enjoy the company of others on this day as I will be doing.
I suggest that one in 20 persons of the opposite sex, in your dating age and genre’ are “your soulmate”. Who agrees with this statement? If not, why would you disagree?
I think the only people who would disagree with that statement Bob would be the people who don’t believe in soul mates. There are some religions out there that don’t believe in this concept and people who follow certain beliefs may not look at it this way.
I just always got a kick out of the “movies”, religiouls fanatics, and optomists, who think there is ONLY 1 person in the world, who is their “soulmate”, and it is “fate” that brings them together… What a bunch of bullshit. There are MANY soulmates (as I said about 1 in 20) who will do just fine.
Bob
I agree with you. I think there is a soulmate in every town, city etc.
One soulmate is complete bullshit in every way.
Can you imagine if you live in Tulsa and your soulmate lives in Seattle.
Complete BS.
Yeah I would agree with that. It amazes me when I see people think there whole world is coming to an end because this one person who they thought was their soul mate left them for somebody else and they feel that there is nobody else who can come into their life now because that was the only person who was predestined to be with them. I just say this to those people: “Wake up to reality!”
Whoa there…I can’t believe it…My genius finally is recognized by the guru. I bow down.
Bob
Its the holidays I am in a giving mood
David, I have a new appreciation for you. A man of acceptance, tolerance, and awareness…Oh well, we are off to daviescowboys.com for another night of dancing and whooping it up. You can check out our pic on their website. Fun, Fun. Yall all have a great Thanksgiving.
PS I recieved some very bad news today from back home (Oklahoma), but am going to try and not let it ruin my vacation,worry too much, and deal with it as best I can, when I get back home. Life does throw a few curves, I guess…
Bob, I agree with that! There is no The One – there are The Ones. Or the ones that we round up to 1.0
A suggestion for David. David I know you are good at helping men and women be happy, and successful in approaching, dating, sex, confidence and etc. however can you help with stress? I know you could help guys like me with this problem.
I have alot of stress, mostly coming from PTSD and everyday life. would like help with that, a co worker of mine tried to help me, she said that there is nothing to worry about, however I thought about it, and to be honest what she said is a lie.
Have a great Thanksgiving everyone. It’s a day to be happy and eat a lot of food.
Tom, the way you’ve used PTSD is different than what I’ve read in other prints. On the news I’d read veterans of war, rape victims, robbery victims and car accident victims. They would describe their experience and it just reads different from what I remember you say is the source of your stress. When you say everyday life. Do you mean the tiny everyday worries that you carry with you? Because with that I think you can handle it better than any PTSD. I just think that its prudent to self-decribe properly your own problems so that you don’t end up throwing the baby out with the bath water. Know what I mean? Putting things out of proportion can definitely harm you.
I’m sorry to be a big downer tonight,, but I just want to say,,,
It may be true for most people that there may be plenty of people who are their “soulmate”,, but it is not true for everyone.
Me,, I have no soulmate,,, I have no one. That I just have to come to accept is never going to change. I didn’t get to be attractive. That is just the hand I was dealt. There is no soulmate for me, and I will be alone for the rest of my life. No amount of pick up advice, dating coaching, and anything else is ever going to change the fact that women just have no interest in me.
Here, it’s the biggest party night of the year,, and I am sitting at home, alone. I have no where to go. If I did go out, I would just end up standing in a corner and watching everyone else get everything that I wish I could have. Everyone else gets to be with someone they can love. All my friends are with their significant others tonight, or are with other couples.
Two of my friends even got married tonight. ( they had a small private ceremony with family, and are having a bigger ceremony where they will invite people next year.) I am very happy for them tonight, but at the same time I am very sad. I don’t really get sad often. But this start of another holiday season really makes me feel awful.
Ok, I’m going on,,, sorry. I just want to say that I wish everyone a very happy thanksgiving, and I hope everyone is very thankful for what they have. I’m going to try to stay away from the blog for the most part, because I don’t want to upset everyone. I get really upset, sad, and lonely during this time of the year, and I can get a little unbearable.
So, everyone enjoy a wonderful holiday season.
Happy Thanksgiving
Getting in touch with your inner self is a major thing for anyone to do. Find out who you are and what it is you want to do with life. In my past relationships with guys I learned something different from each of them. It helped me to grow as a woman and I have done research on men and found out not all guys are the same. I observe other guys and how they will treat other women or listen to them complain about how much a woman spends or how much it costs. Then I think to myself I would not give this guy the time of day. Finding myself after my last divorce was beautiful for today I know what kind of guy I want to be with and who Sandra truly is….
I have found out that when a person has been married xxx amount of years it takes them longer to get over that relationship than it would if they just dated once or twice. When a person breaks up from a long term relationship they need time to themselves to figure out what they want to do next without the second thoughts or uncertainties…Find themselves and go and find the person they want instead of sitting at home and playing woes is me or picking a daisy and saying she loves, she loves me not. well this is all i have to say…dave enjoyed the podcast and it does speak the truth let us know when you send that book out for i may get it and read it…thanks a bunch and keep up the good work my friend from Cali…
@Manny: I think Tom once mentioned a shooting in his past, and that that’s where his PTSD comes from.
Ok, enough with the sad sack routines and stress, we all get them and we all have to deal with them. It’s never easy, and you may need professional help to do so, but get it. Living and looking over your shoulder at what has happened or looking ahead and worrying about what will and what can happen, is all part of the same beast.
That beast is called suffering.
Suffering is all negative, and you can never live in the moment if you always suffer from thinking about what you can and can’t do, or what is already done. Suffering is an evil demon and it creeps up on all of us and gets us all at some point. Some suffer more than others, but even those who do suffer sometimes turn that into strength. That is what you must do, embrace the bad that can, will and has happened. Live and know that life will hit hard, and that you must be willing to go blow for blow until you finally win. Life plays no favorites nor does it punish you for anything, it just throws everything at you and you must deal with this as best you can.
Finally you must let go. Let go of all that can happen and all that has happened, and accept that you cannot control these things. Then you will live in the moment and end your suffering, you must let go and accept and forgive, then you will be truly healed and on the path to happiness, which no person other than you can find.
You are the one in charge of your destiny, you alone walk your path. No one can walk it for you, the question is can you be willing to change enough to make the path the one you want to walk instead of feeling like your being led down the one you don’t.
For those of you in the US I wish you a very happy thanksgiving and rest of the holiday season. May everyone succeed and find peace at the time of year when it is much easier to find than most. I hope that everyone finds that someone that they are looking for this time of year (or someones if you want to
) . Just remember, if you wish to change listen to yourself and how you want to change, then change your thoughts and your destiny will follow. Happy Holidays 
Oh,, and I wrote the above BEFORE I read the garbage from yesterday, telling me I need to just settle for the obese thing downstairs.
Nothing makes me madder than good looking people who get everything telling me I need to settle for someone I’m not attracted to because that’s what someone ugly like me is supposed to do.
None of you,, and I mean NONE OF YOU would sleep with that thing next door that was leaving me those letters. But some of you expect me to. That is BULLSHIT. I’m finished here.
@John: You don’t know it’s settling until you get to know her. honestly, she might be a great girl and might be able to at least become a good friend! Honestly, sometimes attraction develops in strange places. Ive dated bigger guys, skinny guys, tall guys and guys who were only 5’4″. Don’t be so fat phobic, just get to know her! I dont know how obese she is or how scared you are by her, but i really do think you should at least say hello!
You might be surprised 
@KC: Beautiful post!
Very good points!!
What post is John referring to?
I identified somewhat with his other post as I’m approaching 30 and have never even kissed a girl let alone had a gf (so the 1 in 20 thing I’d have to disagree with), but I have no idea where the outburst came from unless it was a comment and not a post he’s referring to. that said, there’s nothing sadder than watching every year’s best days pass by and always being the one left out. My personal life has not exactly gone according to plan despite the fact that I’ve prepared for and worked hard for what I want since day 1.
anyway, happy thanksgiving
ps is that turkey photoshopped?
@james
The turkey has two lemons stuck under the breast skin that bastes the bird giving it a citrus flavor… Not photoshopped
John
Calm down man…i read what they said and if you do not want to date the girl then that is your business…i am no raving beauty or goddess venus myself i have had problems with finding men myself. in school i was the main target practice but later in life it taught me to be stronger. i am without a guy myself and what i seen from your photos i wonder why you do not have a gf by now. i am for you not against you. but john i am older than you are in my fifties and have been divorced four times. we live and learn. do not let these guys on the blog get to you. i love to read your comments and please do not be mad at me. Happy Thanksgiving and I pray all goes well with you maybe we both need to find someone who will make us both happy.
John, I hope your not referring to my post. My only advice was to think about all the other women who loved life who found you attractive. That fat girl loves life and you can find another one who loves life.
okay enough is enough how would the person who just said that tom said something about a shooting from his past…that was his dad that was killed if i am not mistaken how would you like if someone kept opening up your wounds and made your miserable and keep reminding you about the things you did in life. tough is it not…lay off john and tom and they will leave you alone and i myself have nothing against the two. can we not have peace on this blog. or do we have to play satan’s advocates. if john does not want to date the girl then so be it…and hint hint…i am used to blog torture and kind of admire it just lets me know that you are at least thinking about me…Happy Thanksgiving and stop spoiling it for us…
Sandra, we’re all grown adults. I feel there hasn’t been anything written that is so harsh.
@Sandra: I mentioned it in plain terms without alluding to detail to not force Tom to discuss something he didn’t wanna talk about (unless he himself wants to bring it up). It was in response to someone else’s comment, who didnt understand toms past and why he could have PTSD. I was hoping to clarify what Tom said to spare his feelings, as the assumption that his PTSD wasn’t real was unfounded. I don’t think you understood why I brought it up, and I can assure you it’s based off of the best intentions.
Also, not trying to “blog-torture” John either. I think he is an attractive man who doesn’t know it, and he can benefit from hangin out with someone who’s not on the other side of the computer and sees it. Power to him if he doesn’t wanna date this lady or even try a friendship, but it might help him gain confidence by reassuring him that he is attractive.
Also, bigger girls need love too! People come in all sorts of shapes and sizes, and I don’t think we should discount the beauty within someone because of their size. I dated a man who was obese once. He was kind, caring, an artist and great with animals. His size had nothing to do with who he was inside, and as I got to know him, I recognized that. Our relationship eventually failed, as he developed a major depression that really hurt our relationship, and our breakup had nothing to do with his size. After him, I dated a fellow who was 5’4″, and after him a guy who was extremely skinny, and now I’m with an amazing man who has a body like an MMA fighter. I’m not attracted to my partner because of his body, it just happens to be a part of him. I think people need to look a little deeper, and that’s one of the reasons I am trying to push John out of his comfort zone a little. He doesn’t have to try my suggestion, but maybe there’s some food for thought here.
The reason I’m single for Thanksgiving is because of the environment I’m in. For whatever reason, so many of the women around this area don’t worry about dating right now even though its the perfect time to do so. That’s why I cant wait to move back to my hometown next summer and start fresh!
KC, as usual I love the asskicking attitude.
KJD, I’m glad someone explained the tasty, yet grotesque picture.
For everyone who’s feeling lousy this holiday season, take a 5 minute break from the loneliness and write down 5 things you’re happy about in your life. Don’t sit there and say “Oh there’s nothing I’m happy about.” Just take 5 minutes. You can go back to being sad after.
At least give yourself that 5 minute vacation.
@ Intern Dan, It just bugs me to see people complain and complain and not really look and see that the problem is right infront of their faces. I’m a bit of a hippocrite but I have made some good progress with at least talking to women, met up with a couple new ones and they may only see me as a friend but hey it’s progress.
Gotta get some way for attraction down along with kicking my own ass to go out there and talk to everyone, which isn’t easy especially when you’ve been a shy guy for the better part of your life, and yes that’s my excuse that I have to get rid of, that and the I have nothing to say, and groups are where I really falter. These are my biggest sticking points, I’ll worry about attraction after Im over them.
Manny
I am much aware of that…but there are those who seek trouble and try to get others off the blog…say for instance lets attack tom and tom goes off on the person now we read tom is going to kicked off the blog then lets attack john now he is off the blog…
can we respect dave’s blog and get along…but who is next on their list and i am not blaming you either…we have our own lives to live so lets help each other out and not start SHIT….
p.s.
does anyone have the right to defend themselves or do we just take what is handed to us and run like scared rabbits….
Paula R
I have a yo yo figure…when i was a child i was overweight…but today i try to keep my weight down…but no offense taken
Intern Dan
Five things…ummm
1. Playing with my cat mitzi.
2. Next year thinking about my name change back to my maiden name hutchens i am usually known as Sandra Wilhelm.
3. Thinking about dating someone and getting to know them.
4. Coming to Dave’s blog to get some insight.
5. Hoping that one day someone will come into John and Tom’s lives that will appreciate them for who they are…
See i think of others and their feelings like Paula R…i misunderstood what she was trying to say and in turn apologized for the outburst. But that is good what you said five things well here is mine…
Each of us have problems that we need to work on…but one thing i am thankful for i have both parents that are still living and have made it to their fifty third wedding anniversary this month…now that is rare for this time and age. Also they are not in the best of health. But I wake up and know they are still with me. I am thankful to be able to come to this blog and respect others opinions and comments. I am thankful for a lot of things that i do not want to mention here on the internet so to all…Happy Thanksgiving….and many more…
@Manny I don’t say it because I think I have it, I was diagnosed with it. now for me it’s not anywhere close to being as serious as to someone who is a rape victim, or a war veteran.
Happy thanksgiving also, be thankful for everything you have, because some people would want it, now I am not going to celebrate the being thankful part of thanksgiving because I am not thankful for anything, I will only celebrate the eating part of it.
one positive about being single is, more food for me.
Tom
Enjoy and eat a piece of that turkey for me…my thanksgiving day will start with sleep for i have to be at work for the blitz friday night at wally world…yes the 10pm special…it has been a long time since i worked third shift and i am getting sleeeepppyyyy….
im not even half way through and all I can say is wow.
David, you hit the nail on the fucking hammer, and im not even done listening yet!
Without a doubt I will be investing in your new book.
I had this dream last night, a very good. and I feel to need to tell you.
the dream goes, I’m at some wedding, sitting in the corner, eating cake drinking wine. this sexy lady comes and sits next to me, telling me “I hate weddings” I ask why, she says “well, it’s a happy, fun, yet depressing event, for the single gals like me anyways, but you wouldn’t know that because your probably not single”.
I ask her why she assumes I’m taken, she says that I “look like the type”, so I inform her that I’m not, that I’m single. she keeps talking to me and I ignore because I know I would be wasting my time with her, I even ask her why she’s talking to me when she could be talking to the other, attractive guys across the room, she says because I’m interesting. so I’m flattered but still don’t understand because I know women don’t like me.
so I jot down my number, and she invites me on a double date. the dream goes weird here because in the dream, during the date I could see her perspective and what she’s thinking, while I’m talking to the other woman on the date, she talks to the other guy, and looks in jealousy.(but me in the dream doesn’t know it)
I talk to her about how women don’t like me or put me in the friend zone, and she offers to help me with that. so I see this other woman, and she sort of cockblocks, by insulting the date, I get angry and back in the car, I ask her why she did it.
she said “what I didn’t do anything” and I say yes you did, you killed the date). I tell her that she probably has no problem getting men and that I don’t bother her with it.
I tell her that there’s no reason to be hanging out with me because I’m a loser, I tell her that women don’t like me, and that I have no personality or looks. I tell her that she is very attractive but I can’t be her friend because I’m tired of the friend zone, she says “but…” and I cut her off telling her the dating world sucks and no one likes me.
she cuts me off, and says “I like you” so I tell her, “of course women like me as a friend, this is nothing new, please just leave, go hang out with other guys who could financially support you, have the looks, and have the personality. go get a guy, stop wasting time being my friend and trying to get me women, because you know like me and everyone else that I most likely can’t”(misinterpreting that she says she likes me, but I cut her off)
I make her leave, and then call her to apologize. I invite her over, we eat etc, I tell her that I was sorry for talking bullshit, that I know I can’t get women and that I just will accept it. I told her that I rather have her as a friend than have women who don’t even see the real me personally.
we watch something on TV while sitting on the couch, we start getting sleepy, and she lays next to me. while watching the movie she’s all over me. I ask her what she’s doing, and she says I’m comfortable, she then tells me that she likes me, not like a friend, but as a man. she tells me that she was trying to tell me that earlier before cutting me off.
I was overjoyed, we started making out. she kisses my neck etc, and I do the same. and in the dream we have sex. towards the end of the dream we are shopping in a mall out of nowhere.
then of course I woke up.
my question, why couldn’t this be real life? notice in the dream she saved me, she was my knight and shining armor. she liked me before I did anything. why can’t this be reality. a woman who would love me for me. a woman who went after me.
how come men have to go after women? we all want equality right? well why don’t women come after men too? just like women want a man who’s her knight and shinning armor, I want a woman who’s my knight and shinning armor.
just isn’t fair. I guess I could be thankful for that dream at least.
Maybe that dream was a sign to tell you something about yourself Tom. That sounds like an awesome dream to have. If I were to wake up from that kind of dream, I would try to make that happen in reality by allowing myself to start being more receptive to people who I find attractive and engage with them in a more positive manner. When you are able to do this, you will eliminate the self-sabatoging behavior that is preventing you from attracting the person you want to have in your life. To answer your question, there are woman out there who approach men. I know this because I have experienced this first hand myself.
john there you go again with your crap but i do agree with you that settling for a ham-beast is fucking ridiculous we’re not females, big tits or gtfo (exaggerating). but in your case you probably should cause i doubt any other woman would want you, and it has nothing to do with your looks.
tom no one would ever give you a compliment on anything you’re a fucking nut. i bet you walk around pissed off all the time thinking about how woman are assholes because they have no pity for you. just get david’s product and make an effort to change please.
@Chris D: Wow buddy, cool it on the hostility!
Chris D
who whizzed in your wheaties these guys just like yourself are trying to attract women who will it be next me….well i do not scare easy…just to get someone pissed off on thanksgiving right…like the saying goes…opinions are like assholes everyone has one…and one thing i am used to blog torture…
Tom
maybe the dream was telling you something that life is not all bad…
John
we live and learn by our own mistakes…
Remember to respect David’s site it is here for us to use not abuse and if you have a problem then keep it to yourself i can read you…no blog examinations on who to get rid of for i have on thing in common with that it is called IGNORE….
Happy Thanksgiving everyone….
Hey David. I just ordered your book–Naked!: How to Find the Perfect Partner by Revealing Your True Self (Paperback)–on Amazon. I like how Amazon has a purchasing feature that allows you to purchase things in one click. It made it so easy without having to worry about pulling out my credit card. If anyone else wants to purchase this book, check out the link below. You save about $5 if you preorder it now:
http://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/1401933971/ref=redir_mdp_mobile
@david
thank you for this, really. You’re soo right. We need to learn how to take responsibility in our relationships. And say that we weren’t perfect and even if the guy was a jerk or whatever the case is, we still had a part it in it. Saying it was all the other person is the scapegoat we use to help us feel better.
So thank you! I’m getting NAKED!!!
David I think you should write a blog How to deal with stress and pressure and How to enjoy life and live in the present moment. This would be helpful to alot of us.
You and me both TamBam (only with women not guys)!
Having said that, what point do we stop blaming ourself though? What I know is that if I get rejected by a woman, I don’t blame myself. I just say she’s just not in a talking mood right now. How do I make sure that I don’t blame myself for that because if I am putting the spotlight on my short-comings for too long that self-investigation can become counterproductive. Is it in the relationships that were not deep or were superficial do I prevent casting blame on myself? Only the deep relationships can we begin to look for faults within us?
@manny
I totally get where you’re coming from. I think in this podcast though david was mostly focusing on the relationship aspect of accepting responsibility for our part in that relationship when we ask ourselves what went wrong. (not blame because saying that to me feels like everything is my fault and a relationship takes 2 people)
But I’m curious about the same thing though when dating I do the same as you I just say well maybe I wasn’t their type thats ok…but should we be more introspective to see if we actually played a significant role in why the other person wasn’t interested? or would that drive us more crazy?
David says we shouldn’t take it too personal and to know we have a lot to offer. but at the same time you get to a point where you’re not moving forward in your dating life so then maybe at that point we need to look at ourselves to understand why…maybe?
Hey guys it seems that i can not find the podcast, can some one help me? i am really looking forward to the podcast
!
@Steven here’s the link
http://www.blubrry.com/player/?e=1220848&p=9091
Just copy and paste and when the page open it will start playing automatically it’s starts with a lady introducing the show. Enjoy!!