Today I was with listening to a podcast by Mark Schlereth on ESPN.

Mark was one of the best offensive linemen to play football.

He was talking about why certain teams win and certain teams lose.

He shared a really interesting story, and used the Dallas Cowboys and the San Diego Chargers as current teams that have that “here we go again” mentality.

If you watch the San Diego Chargers, they’re constantly losing games that they should win—the Dallas Cowboys are no different.

Great teams—no matter what the score is—always know that they are going to win.  They always know that if they’re ahead, they have to turn on the killer instinct and put the other team away.

If they’re behind, they know that the other team is going to make a mistake and go into the “here we go again” mentality, so they keep playing hard and wait for that moment to occur.

That’s what separates winners from losers.

How does that relate to you and when you try to meet women?

It’s real simple: it’s all your internal programing.

You might have a day where all things are going your way, where all women might be smiling at you, almost begging you to approach them. You might be having a great day at the office having conversations with people you aren’t attracted to, and you can see the desirous eye contact from the women that you are.

But then, all of a sudden, your “here we go again” mentality kicks in.

You approach a woman that you’re attracted to and she doesn’t respond to you. So immediately you think to yourself “here we go again”.

And for the rest of the day your energy is off.

That incredible day you were having is flushed down the toilet because you allowed one experience to turn on your habitual “here we go again” mentality.

Life is no different than a football game.

If the opposing team scores and you’re now only up 24-17, that doesn’t mean that you’re going to lose this game and they’re going to come crawling back. That one touchdown is a singular event, and you still have the whole rest of the game to play the exact way you were playing before—or better.

So many guys that I’ve coached suffer from the “here we go again” mentality.

One little tiny rejection from a woman who doesn’t want them and they go into the “here we go again” mentality again.

Winners don’t do that. Winners truly believe that they will win at no matter what they do, and don’t allow a simple little mishap to stop them on their path.

That’s the answer to all your problems with women: it’s your mindset, it’s your mentality.