ditch your baggageRemember that song, “Brother can you hear me?”

It feels like when we date, we’re a group of people speaking totally different languages. Matter of fact when I read through all the e-mails from all of you, I feel like none of you are hearing each other.

At the Love Blueprint seminar over the weekend in Los Angeles, men and women finally got to hear each other, their frustrations, their needs, wants, their desires.  (If you want to read more about the upcoming Love Blueprint weekend in NYC, CLICK HERE)

Pretty powerful to watch people strip down, get raw, open, vulnerable and naked. No they didn’t get naked, no clothes were taken off.  But what dating is all about is stripping down to your core getting naked emotionally in front of somebody and showing them the real you.

Did that sentence just scare you, did that sentence literally make you want to put on an adult size diaper and crap on yourself?

It seems like being authentic nowadays scares the hell out of people. As I talked about at the Love Blueprint, most people come into relationships with baggage. Some peoples bag can fit in the overhead and everything fits all neatly and they can travel for weeks at a time. Other people when they travel for a weekend trip bring a steamer trunk full of issues.

We all have baggage and we are all imperfectly perfect human beings. During Love Blueprint weekend we talked about baggage and what to do with it. In life, in order to have an amazing relationship you need to acknowledge everything that has ever happened to you before.  To find new love you need to embrace old love.  You can’t blame anybody anymore. What I want you to do right now is, to get in front of a mirror and I want you to get angry.

Who is the person you are most angry at right now? I want you to stand there and point a finger directly at them and tell them, as if they were standing there, what pisses you off about them, how they hurt you, how they disappointed you, what happened.

I want you to look at your life right now. I want you to look at your love life and I want you to take full responsibility for everything that has ever happened to you. No more finger pointing, no more blaming, no more anything.  In order to find new love and true love, you need to acknowledge everything you were responsible for in your life before today.

That’s one of the exercises we do at the Love Blueprint. In order to figure out what women desire, you need to be able to speak your own desires. And in order to speak your own desires you need to look at all your past relationships with a much brighter light shining. In life every choice you’ve made, you made for a reason. There’s a lesson behind every choice.

So today, as you’re pointing the finger at that imaginary person — the person you’re most angry at — take a look at the three fingers pointing back at you and ask yourself, what more could you do to grow as a person?

Open up your heart to accept the things that have happened to you, and start shedding some of the baggage you carry around. My goal is when somebody comes to a seminar with me, is to take the gigantic suitcase they bring, weed through them and get rid of all of it.

So you leave with a carry-on. Everything neat. Everything in Ziploc bags, and nothing more than four ounces. You certainly don’t want the security police at the airport to pull you in because you’re traveling with too much anger in a bottle. Check it out: We’ve got one more Love Blueprint coming up in New York City.

You can read more about it HERE.

Don’t forget to leave the light on.