When it comes to dating, I’ve noticed two main types of men.

There’s the hunter. Every Friday night the hunter heads out with his friends in tow. He’ll go into a bar, and look at every woman there as a target. The hunter literally walks over to a woman, makes love to her with his eyes, and claims her. Within minutes he’s pulled her away from all the other guys trying to talk to her, and leaves them wondering what the hell he did. 

“How did he do that?” They ask.

Hunters like to seek out women. If there are no women where they are, they’ll gather their friends and go somewhere else. Hunters have little patience. They’re in the malls on a Saturday hunting women like pray. They’re out walking in the streets looking for women. Everywhere they go they’re seeking their next target. It’s the hunter’s natural instinct.

Hunters never relax. There’s nothing zen about them whatsoever. They’re going to keep going until they get laid. It doesn’t matter how many women they have to go through. They’ll try one after another until they find one that says “Yes.”

That’s the hunter.

The waiters of the dating world are more Zen. They’re going to head to one place, and they’ll hang out. Maybe they’ll sit at a coffee shop on a Saturday, and they’ll sit in the best location to catch a woman’s eye. I used to do that a lot when I was living over in Brentwood.

The waiter sits and waits patiently. They know it’s only a matter of time until the right woman is going to walk in. Then they’ll make their move and try to connect. Waiters prefer delivery. They like women to come to them.

You know a woman is going to walk by you at some point. You know because you’ve staked out that corner so many times. You know there’s a hot blonde that comes in every Wednesday at 5PM. You wait, and you’re ready because you’ve been practicing your conversation and approach skills.

You relax and strike a pose. There’s always a certain type of pose too. You have a certain look of calmness about you, but women notice you because you have attitude.

You look like some sort of character in a movie. Just waiting. You have a twinkle in your eye, because you know any moment the woman you want to connect with will walk right by. When she does walk by, you look directly at her. Almost as if you’re eating her before you even talk to her. 

I always call it the “Yummy” look. You use the same approach as you use over and over again. It could be the “You look lost,” or the “Are you my blind date?”

You always have an opener that relates to the moment because you have the killer instinct, but you’re a waiter. You know exactly how to “slay” this woman because you’ve been waiting for this moment and you know what it takes. As she walks over, you lay it on her as if she’s the most delicious woman you’ve seen all day.

Now you’re going to have her and you’re not going to let her go. You’re going to flirt with her, and you’re going to make sure she knows you’re flirting with her. The waiter is really a passive hunter. You’ve carefully talked to and connected with so many women, you’re good at this now.

You’ve done every exercise I show you in my programs. You’ve been over and chatted to that little old lady, and the women you’re not attracted to. You know exactly how to look, and exactly how to deliver the first “Hello.”

Maybe you’ve practiced in the mirror, or recorded yourself as I suggest in a lot of programs. You’ve listened to the way you sound, and you’ve worked on your tonality.

You’ve read all the latest magazines so you know what’s going on in the world. You’ve watched some reality television so you can talk about what people are watching. You’ve learned a little about things women relate to. Now you can talk to them about anything.

But it hasn’t always been like this. You failed miserably day after day standing on that street corner, or sitting in that coffee shop. You failed, just like the hunter used to when he went into bars on a Friday night looking for women. But you didn’t quit. You didn’t listen to an audio program and then quit three days later because you didn’t want to do the work. You weren’t looking for a shortcut.

You knew there was no such thing as a magic pill. You’ve worked on yourself. You realized to become successful at anything you have to put in the work. You’ve been blown off by women in public and you didn’t care. You developed a thicker skin.

You got some wrong phone numbers, and you were flaked on plenty of times, but you kept learning until you perfected it. Now you know what women you’re attracted to, and you know how to approach them.

Just like any good marketer knows his market, a successful hunter or waiter knows what type of woman is going to respond to him, and he leads an abundant life. You truly believe there are plenty of women out there for you. You’re not trying to force women to like you, because you like and respect women, and you don’t care if you don’t connect with someone.

You know certain women don’t dig you, and you don’t beat yourself up about it. You’ve been out with friends, and women have liked them over you. You don’t get upset. You bow to your friends and congratulate them on a good night. That’s what a man does.

That’s what a real man is. A real man allows life to happen around him, but takes full control and lives life to the fullest.

But you don’t get there overnight. You don’t get there by deciding to become successful with women. You don’t get there just by downloading programs. You have to follow through with the exercises they give you. When you’re looking for a guru to follow (and thank you for reading my stuff) think about their lifestyle.

Are they living the lifestyle you want? Is he someone with proven results? Has he done the work himself?

No man flies through his Mom’s birth canal into the nurse’s arms and says, “Hey Sugar. I’ll meet you in the nursery.”

You’re not born a master communicator. It takes time and practice. And some people develop faster than others do. Nobody is born with the gift of the gab. Everyone had to learn, and everyone had to define who they are.

You can’t become a hunter or waiter until you define who you are as a man. I remember taking a client out to a clothing store to see him talk to women. There was one woman he spoke to who reacted badly to him. Within seconds, he started turning on the pickup style lines. “You don’t know what you’re missing Babe,” he said.

It was nuts. Not every woman is going to want to connect with you whether you’re a hunter OR a waiter. If I talk to a woman and she doesn’t want to connect with me, who cares?

Now I can tell almost instantly whether a woman’s going to respond to me before I speak to her. I can tell by her energy and the way she carries herself. Its years of experience that has got me to this point. When you do the work, you can go out and meet women, you can have sexual encounters, and you can date with supreme confidence. You can date the women you REALLY want to date.

And you know exactly what I’m talking about guys. The relationships where you’ve chosen the woman, not the other way round. When you’re with a woman you’re attracted to, not just some woman that picked you up. You don’t find her sexy but she’s better than nothing kind of thing.

Go out there and define your style. Are you a hunter or a waiter? Do you go out looking for women, or do you wait for them to come to you?

Meet women. They’re everywhere. Learn about yourself through relationships. Be honest with every woman you meet. Hone your communications skills and be open, honest, and authentic at all times. 

I was just in New York City playing around. I was doing some work, and hanging out with my Brother. And you know what? We just went out flirting and talking to people all day long. We made some great videos, and had some fun.                                     

Do you know why it was so much fun?

Because I enjoy connecting with people. It doesn’t matter to me if I sleep with them. It’s fun getting to know someone new. It’s nice to share a piece of yourself with others and get some of them in return. That’s what living an authentic, amazing life is all about.

It doesn’t matter if you’re a hunter or a waiter. Do the work, and define your style.