You loved her last post so much that I asked the Desperate Housewife to entertain us with her thoughts and wisdom this morning. Now this is not Terri Hatcher or Eva Longoria, but I have to say that this Desperate Housewife is one hot sexy Cougar.

So today I asked our friend: What is the one thing men could learn so they can make a woman hot and full of desire for them?

Enjoy her words of wisdom men! And to all the women readers, please chime in with your foreplay tips. If we can educate all the men then you will benefit the next time you decide to roll around in bed!

What do these senseless men lack? I am sorry there is not enough time or gigabyte space in the world to share it all, but I will sum it up in one word..FOREPLAY! Men need to realize, women don’t expect a 3 hour frolic down the foreplay forest! Men, if you realize fine tuned foreplay can be narrowed down to just a few effective actions on your part, we as women will not only desire the fire, we will in turn cause you to become so aroused, sex will be off the Richter scale! Yes, I am talking seismic sexual satisfaction because of YOUR action! Let me give you four of the million and one ways you can raise our temperature in record time. Visualize every step of this and see if you don’t get aroused just in reading it.

1. Take the initiative to make us feel sexy. Turn off the lights and light a few candles. Put on some sexy music; take us by the hand, saying nothing but with your eyes. Put your hands on our hips and pull us in—not to tight—yet, then just begin to slowly sway. Add a few kisses on our neck and verbalize what you want to do softly in our attentive ear, and by nature this causes our bodies to react. It makes us so hot to hear you whisper your nasty thoughts; we want to in turn tell you what we want to do to you. Verbal communications when it comes to sensuality is such a turn on…for both parties! Temperatures rising?

2. You are still swaying us to the sensual beat of the music. Now cup our face in your hands gently pulling us in for a series of soft kisses, gently stroking our face and hair. If a woman is worried about you messing up her hair, send her home immediately! Chances are she will not be doing anything messy..use your imagination for that one! Look into our eyes, which at this point are smoldering with sexual fire! (my eyes feel heavy and my face is burning up just writing this stuff! I have an innate ability to VISUALIZE) Put your hands on our back and press our body against yours, tighter now. Sexy aggression is a turn on to women. You are now going in for deeper more passionate kisses while your hands touch our neck, our breasts, our hips…slowly working your way down and up again. I promise—our hands will not be hanging to our sides. We will be caressing your body with our hands, lips, body parts…get the picture. VISUALIZE! Approaching explosive temperature now?

3. As we reciprocate the mutual desires you are feeling relay to us you are getting hot and bothered with a little moan here and there. One huge turn on for a woman is to hear her man is losing control of his inhibitions hearing soft sexy noises she is cause of. Just about to catch fire now! (Really I am! I do have a fire extinguisher handy 😉

4. For a change of scenery, don’t take us to the bedroom. Keep us in that room where the mood has culminated. Eye contact has led to sexy swaying, which has led to bodily contact, which has led to now uncontrollable passionate kissing and touching; moans are more than not from us both now. It is time to get down to business. Take us down slowly. Have a cup of ice already ready and grab a piece to run down our hot body. As it melts, trace it with your tongue. TURN ON! Have a bottle of heating oil on hand. We like to give you full body massages…it turns US on to do so. (I am a Massage Therapist, so I love to give a good massage!) Having sex on a blanket or rug in the living room can heighten orgasmic activity greatly. You both have advantages by having a firm surface below unlike the bed that gives. Call 911 and have them on stand-by! Fiery temperatures are now raging!

This has taken all of 20 minutes guys! No, not me writing it—You using your sex appeal in such a way, we are ready for passionate stimuli at every degree! Isn’t it worth 20-30 minutes of your time to have explosive sex? (Yea, I know I added 10 more minutes in there, but you aren’t going to be watching a clock. You’ll be thinking with your…Ok. Rhymes with clock; Oh, just take the L out and there you have it!!!

These are just a few of the many ways to turn a woman on. Use your imagination. These that I have shared are High End turn on moves to a woman. We love to feel sexy and feminine. You have taken control of our bodies here, for now 😉 When the heat is on, some of we women like to be the aggressor.

Men, foreplay is essential if you are going to satisfy a woman and keep her wanting you over and over again! You play with a whole different kind of fire when you douse the fire of foreplay. This is the point where women’s eyes start to wander. Once the eye has been caught, the brain kicks in and starts to fantasize about foreplay—only you have been omitted from the fantasy. If you let it simmer to long, your once faithful woman is getting her needs met by the foreplay king! Hopefully she hasn’t turned to the foreplay queen! Yes, I mean another female. NO! Shut up! I can hear you thinking, “I wonder if the “desperate housewife” has gone lesbian on us?!?” With all due respect to anyone who is of that nature, I like the beauty of mans chiseled body, his big strong hands, sexy legs—Ok STOP ME NOW!!!! Such torture! How do we do it?

Until next time, let your imagination run away for awhile. It is not the satisfaction that your body desires, but a good fantasy can ease the tension and help get you through in those lonely deserted times. I really do love you all!

The Desperate Housewife July 11 2007