Delete The Number
By David Wygant

You just texted someone . . .

You went out with them. You had a good time. You sent a follow-up text and . . . they don’t text you back. You start to think “Why doesn’t this person like me? I like them. Why didn’t they text me back?”

Then you text them again a couple days later, and they don’t text you back. You start over thinking the situation. You start thinking “What did I do wrong? I thought they liked me. What are they thinking?” People always want to know what that other person is thinking.

So you start to drive yourself crazy wondering if there is anything you could have done differently. You even start talking to your friends and driving them crazy. You recap the date in your own mind.

You go over everything you said on the date and you start to think “Maybe I shouldn’t have done that (or said that).” Besides becoming a different person to whom that other person is attracted, there is nothing you can do!

Remember all of the people you have gone out with on dates whom YOU never called back or texted. It works both ways.

So stop getting so upset about one person. Realize that you just didn’t have the chemistry that you thought you had with that person and move on. Drop the ego!

Think about all the people you have gone out with that were one-date wonders. You went out with them and you really didn’t like them, so you didn’t bother returning their calls or their texts. It works both ways!

When I go out with somebody and I have a good time, I’ll call or text them the next day and tell them so. If they don’t call or text me back, I don’t drive them crazy.

More importantly, I don’t drive myself crazy. I am not a mind reader. I don’t know why they decided not to like me.

You will never know why someone decides not to like you. You have just got to learn that part of dating is the unknown. Unless you and your friends are mind readers, you will never know why someone did not text you back.

There’s another part to this. It is the reason I titled this blog “Delete The Number.”

Three weeks after you didn’t get a return text from someone, you catch a buzz and you either drunk text them or mistakenly text them instead of someone with the same first name whom you text every day. A mistake text is alright, but a drunk text is not.

There’s a good reason you do not want to do this. What usually happens when you drunk text someone in this situation, is that you will ask them why they didn’t text you back or why they didn’t like you. This is where you start to look desperate and clingy.

From now on, follow this rule: If after going out on a date with someone you have texted them twice and they haven’t gotten back to you, DELETE THAT NUMBER!!!

Your cell phone should not look like your myspace page where you have a couple hundred people who are your “friends” but are people to whom you never talk. That’s what I love about myspace . . . I have 700 friends and I don’t know who they are! (That, however, is a blog for another day).

This rule applies even if you have gone out with someone more than once. I know you’ve probably asked yourself “Why are they not into me? I don’t understand how they could change their mind. We seemed to have so much fun. It seemed like we really clicked.” Think about this for a second.

You have gone out with people with whom you had a good time on a date, but after sleeping on it you changed your mind about them. That’s what we do as humans. Once you have time to think about something after “the moment” has passed, we sometimes change our minds.

My last car I liked driving . . . for about four days. Then I changed my mind. That is why stores have return policies. That woman you went out with, she returned you . . . she changed her mind.

I tend to judge a date this way. When I go out with someone and I wake up the next morning thinking about them, I know I want to see them again.

If, on the other hand, I don’t realize I had a date the night before until after I’ve woken up and worked the entire next day, it means that I am not into that person. They didn’t excite me enough.

It does not mean I didn’t have a good time or that they weren’t a nice person. There just wasn’t enough chemistry. It is not about you . . . It just means that the person didn’t share the same excitement that you did.