dont lead her onI got a great email from a young guy named David. He’s 16 going on 17, and he’s learning an amazing lesson about life and dating. For those of you who are older, and don’t think this advice pertains to you, you need to realize it does. If you’d have learned what David’s learning now at his age, your whole life would have probably been different. It’s called having an abundant mindset, and being authentic. Let’s look at his email and I’ll explain why. He says…

“Hi Coach,

I was listening to some dating advice recently and something hit me along the way.

They were talking about the concept of having fun and enjoying the opposite sex. There was this 50 year old guy on, and the “expert” told him to keep dating this lady, even though he knew she wasn’t right for him. At first this sounded OK, but it goes against what I’ve lived by, my chivalry if you will.

Could you answer this for me please?

If you’re having fun with someone, and you know that soon you’re going to break up with them, doesn’t that make you a rude ass player? I mean if you’re leading a woman on, and making her think you like her when you know all along you’re going to breakup with her, you’re just nasty aren’t you?

I also wanted to say I’m in High School and nearly 17. Thanks to your wonderful work I can almost date any girl I want now, which means I can have a new girlfriend every month, but I want to know if it’s OK to enjoy the experience with them even though I know I won’t stay with them.

P.S. Keep up what you’re doing. We all really appreciate you coach!”

David says…

David is learning an amazing lesson. He understands the power of an abundant mindset. He’s becoming authentic and honest, and he wants to know the right path. So, if you’re with a girl and you want to have sex with her, or just hang out, but you know you don’t want to date her, you have to be honest with her.

Tell her right away. “Listen, I don’t want to have a long term relationship right now. I can only really see us being sex buddies. I’d love to hang out and have fun, but with no strings attached. Is that OK with you?”

When you’re authentic and honest, you allow her to make a decision. Now you know a lot of women won’t listen, and they’ll go ahead with things anyway thinking they can change your mind. But at least you’ve been honest with them from the start. You told them your intentions, and you didn’t pretend to be something you’re not.

Women will appreciate the fact you’re being so honest with them, because most guys aren’t. Most guys just pretend to have feelings for women just so they can get laid. You told her what you want, and you allowed her to make an adult decision about whether she was happy to go on with you. Whatever decision she makes is up to her.

The other great thing is how you’re living with an abundant mindset. You know that if you’re open and authentic with her, even if she decides against being with you, there’s going to be another great woman down the road. You’ll probably meet another great woman a day or two later, and she WILL be happy to have fun and fool around with you. It’s about being honest and authentic. When you’re authentic, you’re not going to hurt women because you’re clear with them from the beginning. That’s what life is all about – The power of truth and authenticity!

Well done you!