Date Like A Dog
A post about Dating Like A Dog Posted By David Wygant
Imagine for a second how simple dating would be if we conducted it like a dog:
Our masters would take us to a park where we all can play with each other. If we were like a dog, we would immediately sniff each other (no details needed here . . . and I’m not suggesting that we need to sniff each other’s asses). We could maybe casually run into each other, maybe sniff each other’s neck , or maybe see if we have good breath. If we have chemistry, then perhaps we can have our master throw the ball. I don’t suggest picking up the ball in our mouths like a dog though (picking it up with our hands will be fine). If we get bored playing and wrestling together, we can go meandering around and find another person with whom to play. We would keep this up until we find that person in the park with whom we have complete and utter chemistry.
Meeting people like dogs would be great. Dogs don’t get loaded when they go to the park. Dogs don’t need to bring six annoying friends with them, and wonder who’s going to be the designated driver. Dogs never wonder what the right thing is to say to another dog, because they’re all about natural chemistry.
Also, if a dog doesn’t want to play anymore with another dog, it just growls and the other dog will walk away. When a woman has to deal with an annoying drunk guy at a bar, she can’t growl to get him to leave, nor can she simply ignore him to get him to leave.
Think for a second if there was this great park where we could all go and play. Think about the money that could be saved by not going to all those bars and clubs. Some of us who live on the coast where real estate is so expensive would finally be able to afford our dream condominium.
In reality what’s so amazing about this concept, is that dogs never seem to run out of other dogs to meet. Dogs don’t play games. When a dog is excited to see you, it greets you and it doesn’t worry about what you think.
Even a dog that has been abandoned and beaten by previous owners, is open to all new experiences again after it receives some nurturing and lots of love from its new family. How many of you have been in bad relationships, and you carry that anger forward into your interactions with everyone you meet? If you were more like a dog, you would treat each opportunity as a new one, and you would not blame new people for things that happened in the past.
Not only that, if we were more like dogs we would handle rejection with ease. When a dog goes over to another dog and that dog doesn’t want to play, the dog just goes away and doesn’t think about it for the next six days like humans do. It will just find another dog that wants to play, because dogs naturally have the abundance principle in their souls. Or, maybe, dogs just don’t have the power to over-analyze everything like most humans do.
Each day and each moment is a new one for a dog. Each day and each moment for a human could be the same self-torture from the day before.
So in order to have a great time dating, I suggest we get our mayors to build “people parks.” Oh wait . . . we already have those. Every city has a great park, so why aren’t we engaging other humans like dogs engage other dogs. It’s time to embrace your dating life like a dog embraces its life. The only thing I don’t suggest is the ass-sniffing check and greeting.
[…] other day I was at Whole Foods with Daphne. For all of you who don’t know Daphne, she is my black English Labrador. I was sitting outside at a table, mildly enjoying my lunch. I eat there all the time on account of […]
Hey,Yea I know I am a day late and a dollar short. My inbox was full of comments when I got off the phone tonight and finally checked it. This has been one of my roughest days ever as far as the vets training goes. No time to breath.
Jeff Kee? Yours was the last message in the 51 I believe that were in there. Welcome to the comment board here. I had to stumble over here and see where this last comment originated. Joan, baby doll, are you misbehaving? I think I need to throw you over my shoulder and hear you laugh before I privately reprimand you;)) You are full of positive energy these days! I love to hear it. Wouldn’t you say a hot air balloon ride would be the perfect outlet for such energy?? Ha ha Doesn’t everyone agree with that suggestion? (Help me out here)Ha How about some parasailing in Cozumel??? Yea, you guessed it! A little time off is around the corner. I need it and would love to share it with someone fun and crazy. Joan..you are “the chosen.” Ha Ha. If I put you on the spot here, I can get backup hopefully? Really would love it! Well, bedtime has far passed but just curious to the comments. I am one eye shut already, so I’m out—literally! ha ha
Joan, settle down… be a good girl now… 😉
Joe, you are so funny. There is no need for apology. I fully understand the demands of a scheduled chaotic life.
You are not a braying ass nor and ego maniac. 🙂 I’m going to “bray” here on your behalf–so hush;)
I have been fortunate enough to see a few of your writings and they are beautiful. You are full of passion and feeling with the ability to express that freely flowing in words.
A large percentage of the population in this crazy world we live in don’t know how to express their inner self, and some only have hate and malice to share.
You are an artist Mr. Joe. An artist of honesty with a humble heart. Embrace those qualities and don’t be afraid to share the fruits of what is produced out of your heart:) Cheers to you!!
jessica, right not i’m writing an album (music) which i hope to be recording in the late fall or winter. between going back to college and work, and my other writings. it can get a little hard, though i always make time for my art, it’s first in my book ;)… as for telling you gals/guys about the album, i’m too modest… i feel like a ego maniac or a braying ass, when i talk about myself and my art..i hate sounding like those guy who think there all great and shit.. or that i’m something special because i compose… i’m just me… and i’m gald to be me.
Joan sorry about not chatting, just been busy, with the writing and coping with other things in my life…
cheers,
Joe
BOW CHIKA BOW WOW
Party poopers:) see you tomorrow;0
I slept with women much older than me and it was very very very satisfying. You have no idea. I’m 21. Some of my friends called me the MILF Hunter.
Alone again—naturally:( Has everbody gone in to hibernation of masterb$#@%?
I hate bloogin alone.
Jeff, is that a “dog” call? A dog calling out a “Chika?”BOW CHIKA BOW WOW LOL just playing I have seen the commercial
AXE isn’t it?
darkpoet, where are you??
Hey. Joe, the DarkPoet,
What are you writing? Music? Songs? Poetry?
Tell us more!
Cheers to all!
Joe, I hope you know I will never judge you or anyone for that matter.
I really would like to know your album focus, or I wouldn’t ask:) NOW, if you want to share it with me is your decision which I respect either way;)
I know I am misunderstood, misinterpreted, misaligned, misled, misstook, WHY oh why can’t this include—MissAmerica? LOL Not I sure would not want to be her. I ampretty happy with me;))) Take care, relax your mind and cheers to you my friend.
Darkpoet–Joe lol with your comment I went back and saw all my posts! Damn, do I ever think on a clean headed level??? OR should that be clean level head?
One would think I am on speed–I’m not! I don’t know whathas gotten into me these last few days. I feel so free to be me:)) Watch out–I could break out singing, “I gotta Be Me!” LOL I do sing for money so it wouldn’t sound bad, just the song choice is–old? Cheers to you
you needn’t ask joan!?!?!!? well i’m glad someone does, instead of me asking others all the time… i’m well thanks Joan, i’m doing well, little frusrated on the artistic side, but otherwise doing i’m doing o.k..
mind fog? i just need to work at it. i dont think you’d be interested in my albums focus.. but i know i can come to you once in a while and express concern for myself as well a others, and i wont get judge too badly because you know as cliche as it sounds artist are quite misunderstood, well as oddities in our own right. i suppose..
cheers,
Joe
HEY JOE!! How are you–well I guess I needn’t ask. I bet a whole lot of people wish I had “writers block!” lol I just feel very fiesty lately and I guess it shows in everthing I do and say. LOL
What is your album focus? I hope your mind fog clears and you are able to start flowing with that.
jessica, i live in boston, as for the the the guy whos experimenting i think thats a ploy, well partly. guys who go for older women because they mostly know what they want, there most of the time mature and of course common interest.
Joan, after all those massages, how in bloody hell do you have any energy left in thoses hands of yours to type. lol 😉
i have writer block joan, driving me nuts lately. trying to write an album here, and i have nothing solid…
cheers,
Joe
LOL Well I qualify as a cougar and I may just have to fu$# a buck or two! (Not at the same time!) Lol
Yes they do go all night long–if you give them no choice–although “they” seem very agreeable;)
Well, this guy is surely a young hottie. Hes got guns–like those:) I’ll just have to see what happens. It is not that I am not attracted, very turned on and flattered, I just feel like I will always be the “teacher.” I do love at times to be the “take charge” woman in bed, and can go the extra mile—but Jessica asked me if I know what I wanted–yes I do know (what I want to try.) Someone 35 or older would be interesting. I want to feel the man take the wheel and be “in charge.”
Who know, I might like the young guys way better. That would sure make getting sexually relieved a whole lot easier. lol they seem to be like bees to honey.
Thanks you two studs! What the hell. You only live once—I need to start indulging in this life:)))
Good job Jeff.
When I was 23 living in NYC we went cougar hunting in the Hamptons every weekend.
It was all about being a fun young buck enjoying the experience with the older woman.
She was happy…I was happy and I am huge fan of women taking on young lovers.
They last all night long…….
LOL Jessica you are crazy! I haven’t had any of them tell me that–yet! I think I’d tell him, “If you are experimenting–you need a guinnea pig!”
or a girble—whatever! lol
A 27 year old guy (I asked this time) beautiful piercing blue eyes and black hair asked me if he could touch my calves and was freaking out on my legs. It was flattering, but enough is enough.
We talked for a few and I had to go. I really did have to leave, so I wasn’t fibbing. I have a little “gym date” to show him some calve building exercises! WOO HOO;) It is just funny to me because it is just since I hit the 40 mark this has started.
David, you are the sexpert! Is that what these young guys have going through their “heads?” Sex with the older woman syndrome??
I think Jessica is right. I never thought to send them to Wygant the wit master;)
I need to make some dang cards with the email address and the name David Wygant on them. I am really serious. I would do that. Do I have your permission to do so Mr. Wygant?
I’ll jump into that hole with ya…
I live in CT. Is anyone here who lives in CT? I didn’t think so…
Regarding young men.. Lately, I too became a magnet for the young men! I even I asked one guy, why he would be interested in dating a women who is so much older then he is? He said, he is experimenting!!! He goes out with all women between the ages 22 and 50!!!
You know what I started to tell these guy? I tell them, I can
Joan : I’m not into gang bangs – I like all the attention to myself. 🙂
Joan : I wasn’t shut down, I went for a long bike ride around Vancouver.. about 20 kms. I thought I’d get in shape for you 😉
So… where were we? Oh yes, about who pays who after the night has Cum to an end… as you put it?
Jessica–lol–I know exactly what I want!! lol Do you?
I think you want Jim;) Jim????;) Now I have to give y’all a hard time! lol
I am still cooling down from my workout:)
Upon that note—I wish I could say—“It’s Hammer Time!”
BUT, since there is no one to touch this (except the young ass guys at the gym–I am a friggin magnet for the young! Sure wish I were younger—might get to know what dry humping is;) lol
I must say “It’s shower time!” I love every one of you!!! KISS KISS!!!
Joan,
Where are you? Come back! We all love you!
$50? That’s it? Give me a time and place. 😛
Nice pun, I think we’ll make good friends. I just hope you’re not an old 40 yr old balding gay male behind a fake name :p
Joan,
Cool down! I love you and I am on your site. 100 percent!
Do you know exactly what you want?
Joan :
Assume I’m at a bar with you and I offered myself to you for just $50 for the whole night with a bottle of wine as a bonus and you say to me “Oh my God you’re such a dog!!!”
Is that a compliment masked in embarrassment?
So when people say “Oh my god Jeff, you’re such a dog” it’s a compliment??? :D:D:D
Ok David. You have been “virtually” spanked!
Now, it really is time for a good sweat;)
B back later folks:) kiss kiss!
Did I scare you away David? Maybe I should spank you?
Maybe you just need to spank me harder! lol
Just don’t break your hand on my rock—;) You know where I am at there;)
Yes Joan I have seen a chocolate lab…..I was not born 2 weeks ago:)
You are so funny…so are you hooking up back here? Do i need to spank you again:)
OOOOP! Hold the treadmill! lol David have you seen a chocolate lab? Touched one? Let one sleep with you (hush up dirty gutter minds) I want to meet Daphne.
Really, just watching her I love her. She is so obedient from what I see in the videos. She is the better dog;)
Ho hum:() Abandoned again. What to do?
I think I will go to the gym and work out now;) that is a good place to–wellthats a good place to do a lot of things;) BUT My ipod shuffle keeps me entertained–so its time to sweat!!!
See y’all later! Kiss kiss
Except a black lab…which is what i have!!!
Jessica, David is right there. Nothing does beat a CHOCOLATE lab;)
My baby girl is helping me dig that hole as we speak! LOL
Hey man, I never said I was in to gang bangs! lol
OK as a respected dog in the Wygant community, I am going to dig a DEEP hole and crawl into it! LOL
Who respects me you ask??? I DO!!!! LOL LOL
Jessica! LOL Girl you are supposed to be helping me here!
I am going to share the “wealth” here with you??? I can’t be a selfish “bitch!” LOL
Ok Jeff. lol if you are still asking about “who is paying who??”
Honey, you ain’t been listening. AWE!! LISTENING!;)
This is a BIG teaching with David—actually listening to what women say. good stuff!
Ok I come back and all of a sudden I really DO feel like a “bitch!” LOL
You know how when a female dog is in heat and all the male dogs are ready for a big gang bang?!! Yipe Yipe Yipe!!! (Tail between my legs & running:0 ) LOL LOL LOL
I want my mommy!!
Oh and David baby, I don’t “Prance” to begin with. THAT comes AFTER the “POUNCE!” Purrrrrrrrrrr Purrrrrrrrr meow;)
Hey, Joan,
I want to know how was it! 🙂
Joan…… 🙂 glfingboy2@yahoo.com
Yes i have one comment.
Jeff beware of Joan she will wipe you out:)
She is a tiger waiting to prance on men who challenge her mind…and once you have that mind of hers going you will be in for the night of your life:)
Jessica…Nothing beats a great Lab!!!
A few more pictures of David
LOL looks as if all the men have shut down?
David any comments from you? I feel very abandoned here:()
Ladies, thanks for the help!! LOL Elizabeth—and Jessica? I can always count on you two:( ?:)
Actually Jeff, the “a” in my name should be an “h”! lol Playing
No no no no no! Read the finer print. That was 50—+!
I am priceles baby:)
Jim, cat got your tongue, or are you being a quiet little doggie because less is more;) You are not responding?
I really hope you know I am playing with you. Honestly people who have not met or known me, don’t really know how to take me.
Really I do have a serious side to me, and am capable of sitting down and conversing, but I LOVE to joke and laugh and play around.
Sooo, Know that that is my personality (good or bad as it may be) and I would never do or say anything inappropriate knowingly:)
Well Jeff, if I say, “Oh my god you are such a dog.”
That is probably not good. NOW if I say, “Oh my god you are such a dog, LETS GO–your place or mine?”
You’d definitely feel the need to pay me $50+ when our night had Cum to an end!;) LOL
Ladies, you can jump in and help me anytime here!
I don’t want to look like the only “bitch” (female dog in heat!) here:)
Jeff, that really depends on where you are at and what you are doing!:)
Jim, see what you have started here??;)
Jim, you made the statement up there, “I’m in?”
“In” what are you referring to?:) LOL
You asked for it baby, now here I am–give it to me!
Lol Jim:) Woof woof! lol Well what kind of action do you want here on this public blog;)?
You want me down on all fours panting and licking? You are the master so tell this dogette what it is you are wanting. I am pretty smart for a dogette:) Yea I hear you thinking with that smile–“smart ass;)
Joan….. All talk an no action from you so far! Come On! 🙂
Cool Elizabeth:) I was just closing out on my gmail when I got this, went there and left a positive note as well;)
Jessica, like the “morning mantra” statement! I think I will “sniff” that idea out for myself. Hey, it is the dogette in me;))
Jacob, the “eyes” have it for you don’t they?. You can look at me with those beautiful blue-greens of yours anytime you take the liking too;) Yea, I am full of the “sexual surprise!” lol Funny man–glad to hear no complaints!
Well Jim, I have to say hello to you. You are coming along now–2 words is good;) You know I am playing with you;)) 🙂
Hey, best blog yet David! Ha I guess I am partial to pets especially dogs. Honestly, I really think some of these jokers out there give dogs a bad name. Ha ha I like the concept. Working with dogs on a daily basis, if you will look in their eyes you can almost hear them speaking. Very much like people. Eyes catch me before anything..of course my eyes make their way down. Ha ha Unfortunately in a vets office, they are either sick or scared and that is exactly what they relay to you in the eyes. There are those that come in tails wagging no matter what! My kind of patient. Joan were you up late…or early there?;) Ha ha Your comments always contain that element of sexual surprise. Ha Not complaining…love it! Ok well duty calls. Have a good one everybody. I’m out.
I’m in 🙂
Ohhh, this is so good!
I am going to make it my morning mantra
Well, here I am at 2:30 in the A.M. answering the “dog blog.” lol Up late for good cause, so it’s all good:)
My dog is laying at my feet right now without a care in the world. Yea, I say being more like a dog in a lot of ways would not do any of us harm. The loyalty this dog has shown me I hope to find in a scooby doo on steroids—with 2 legs! (Hmm a third leg might come in handy–lol) Thanks for letting us out of the butt sniffing ritual David;)
I think this is a great analogy to the perfect dating scenario. Lots of variety to choose from, no drunk “dogs” to fight off and loyal companionship:) What more could we ask for in a date?!
One real perk I see in this, (and of course I “wood”) dogs got it down when it comes to one of the most perfect sexual positions you can experience (as a woman anyway);)
I can honestly say I am like the dog that has been (mentally) beaten down, but refuse to let that interfere with my present or future happiness. I am worth more than that;) When I do find that “nurturing,” I will be all too happy to lap it up!
Great blog David;) I love it and I’ll let ya knowhow the eating outof the bowl goes. lol