My friend and I were looking at Tinder the other day.

I started reading everything women write.

It appears we have a massive disease running through this country right now. It’s the disease called ‘Not Want.’

I’m going to tell you what Not Want is, and I’m going to tell you why it’s a disease and why it’s impacting so many women’s love lives.

You see, Not Want is talking and telling the universe about what we don’t want. When you wake up in the morning and you tell the universe you don’t want something, all it hears are the words that you’re requesting, the subject.

hopless-woman-on-cell-phone For instance, you can tell the universe that you really don’t want a stressful day today. The universe doesn’t hear the words don’t and want, it hears stressful, and it delivers that upon you.

You tell the universe that you don’t want any trouble with your kids today. The universe will hear trouble with your kids and create controversy that day.

You tell the universe, and dating sites like OKCupid and Match that you don’t want a hook-up.

That you don’t want to meet players.

That you don’t want to be somebody’s booty call.

The universe doesn’t hear ‘don’t want’, it just hears hook-up, booty call, players.

It gives you exactly what you don’t want, every time.

That’s the power of Not Want.

I noticed, when I read through online dating profiles, a lot of women write down what they don’t want. Which means that they’re constantly getting what they don’t want.

See, not wanting something doesn’t mean it’s not going to show up. The universe gives you the words  that you put out there. It gives you the order that you placed.

You placed an order for a player and a booty call.

A lot of people don’t understand this powerful way the world works.

I recently started doing an online dating program that is going to be out pretty soon. There’s a section in there on Tinder.

I tell women all the time to talk about what you do want.

Today I want everybody to start writing their Do Want list, not their Not Want list.

When I wake up in the morning I tell the universe that I want amazing things. I want a beautiful person to share things with.

I don’t tell it what I don’t want. I don’t say I don’t want an unaffectionate, cold person.Because I know it’s going to give me that.

A lot of us don’t get how powerful the universe is. We don’t get it because we don’t fully understand it yet.

So, from this point forward, instead of writing what you don’t want, I want you to write what you do want.

I know how frustrating it can be.

A lot of the time you’re frustrated with dating. I know you think you’re actually taking a stand for yourself when you allow yourself to list the don’t wants. But you’re not.

I’ve learned this many different ways. I’ve had many powerful life lessons on ‘don’t wants’. So now, I’m just talking about what I do want.

I want what I desire. I want what I deserve.

Try being positive and watch how that shows up. Watch the difference in your life.