Maybe after reading the first blog of the New Year, I may inspire you in a whole new direction this year.
Are you a woman who just can’t seem to ever pick up the phone to talk anymore? You’re constantly texting men, but you’re never actually connecting with men.
A male client of mine recently was dating a new woman. They dated for about four weeks, and the entire time they spoke on the phone one time. Why? She’d never pick up the phone. It was all texting to her.
He would call her. She would see the call but not pick up. He’d leave her a message and then she would text him back right away. Eventually he got sick of the whole thing. He even told her that she was way too text-reliant, that he’d like to hear her voice every once in a while.
That’s the problem with modern technology. Modern technology has given us a wonderful excuse not to connect with people. Oh sure, you think you’re connecting with a man because you send out some great little text in the middle of the day and he texts you right back with something cute. That sort of thing is great once in a while.
But in reality, when you’re texting you’re not having a real conversation. You’re not connecting with somebody. You’re really not experiencing the other person. If you’re dating a new guy, you really need to understand that you can mix things up a little bit. A little texting here and there, a little phone call, a little voicemail action, maybe some Skype or chat in the middle of the day.
Mixing it up in communication is such a great thing. When I was dating a lot of new women, it was such an amazing thing to come home, look at my phone, and see that I got three new messages. It was like opening a new present. I’d listen to them, and it would be a voicemail message from a woman I’m interested in, not some stupid text that I’d reply back to in another short text.
If you really want to get him intrigued, dial back the technology a little bit and leave him a nice voice mail. Allow him to hear your voice, because your voice is what’s going to turn him on and it’s what’s going to get him to look forward to seeing you. Your voice will intrigue him, and it’s such a great part of that whole cat and mouse game at the beginning of the dating process. The voice communicates so much more than a silly line of text. And the more he hears, the more he wants you. The more you can tease him verbally, the more he’s going to come back for more.
The last 3 women I met online…all 3 said “I prefer to text” So in the end I had to ask them out via text cause they didn’t want to talk on the phone! I see women walk around with thier faces glued to texting and I swear I just wanna rip the phone out of thier hands and smash it..Don’t you have anything else in this world to look at other than your phone?
Kevin:
I’m a women and I have the same problem with dates wanting to text all the time. I’m a phone person, it is intimate and the best thing if you can’t be with the person. I’ve really become offended by texting when it is his routine way to communicate. I want to ‘get’ into his voice. Is it sexy, does it turn me on? If yes we may stay on the phone for hours sharing, and getting to know one another. Texting is rude! It’s for business when your running late for an office meeting. Even if my date may be running late, I want to hear the sincerity in his voice when he tells me he will be there in a minute. I want the anticipation of his walking in the door and holding him. Not possible with a text. I feel like I’m an ‘appointment’ he has made in his rushed day. Not sexy at all. The texting comments can be so ‘pat’ and stored in a cell phone, it doesn’t feel warm and fuzzy. Thinking, ‘How many other women has he used this text on?’ can ruin a date before it starts.
My new username for this year is going to be “ILoveRealMen”! lol It sounds like I’m a gay man! lol
Texting is the stupidest thing, ever! Sexting, on the other hand… lol ….mmmm…well, I wouldn’t know anything about that! lol
David, when are you getting married again? lol
OMG!! You know what, David Cutie? lol I was always feeling like, I wish I were just naturally gorgeous like years ago because then I wouldn’t have to do any of this hard work lol of smiling at men, looking at them, saying “Hello!” lol etc! It was so much easier back then! but I was recently listening to a model describe her dating life and she was saying how her looks attract a certain type of man and it is hard for her, too, to find a good man! and it reminded me of what it was like back then when I was gorgeous, told I was beautiful by everyone all day, asked by everyone if I were a model, hit on by creeps and told to get in their car lol and how that’s all that people saw in me was my looks! They didn’t even see that I was a person! Just a mannequin! lol So at least now it’s better and people just see me as a sex object! lol OMG!!
I’m torn. I’m a woman who can spend hours on the phone … but that’s just not an option as a professional woman, even if the man is special and fascinating.
What are we supposed to do? There are only limited hours in the day, and we don’t have unlimited energy (at least I don’t).
I dont agree with any of this my man like my text its all and what you say in the text but we do both text and phone calls but i guess you have to have a mutual agreement with each other there must be miss commucation on both partys see if your both forth coming in what to agree on you will have a lot better comucation skills on what each other wants try asking it works lol
OK.. I am seeing a guy, we were friends first, and I know that he is seeing another woman. What I do not understand is while I see him on a almost daily basis, we have been dating about maybe 4 months or so and he has been dating the other lady about 3 months. All they do is TEXT!!! i can not understand that. Maybe email or facebook mail a bit. They do not talk on the phone, they only see each other every 10 days.
He says that the communication and gettig to know is going very slow.. I just can not understand that at all. I like spending the time with him, face time to me is quite important. Though I am hoping that this willput me in the running for a better status if we want to take this to the next level!! since we do talk more and face to face and seem to have more in common.