Dating Expert David Wygant Gives Students Sound Advice

March 9, 2007

By Alexandra Giamalva

Picture this: a tall, lanky man wearinSg tight dark jeans, cowboy boots and a multi-colored, rhinestone studded shirt with a skull on the back. When I first saw him, I thought that maybe I had accidentally walked into Splash instead of the Union Ballroom. Then, I found out that he lived in Los Angeles. Oh, now I get it.

But despite his interesting choice of clothing, David Wygant’s lecture about dating on February 28 at the Union Ballroom was funny, smart and very interesting.

Mr. Wygant is the leading dating expert and image-maker in the nation. He wrote the book, “Always Talk to Strangers: Three Ways to Meet the Love of Your Life.” He has appeared on TV shows like “Blind Date,” “Inside Edition,” “Party at the Palms,” “Dateline,” and MTV’s “Made.”

You might remember LSU student Tony Brown who appeared on “Made: I Want to Be a Lady’s Man.” Tony introduced Mr. Wygant at the lecture, thanking him for his help when he appeared on the show.

After introducing himself and giving the audience a brief biography, Wygant began his lecture by saying, “We are all born afraid of the opposite sex.”

He said, “Even if we think we are not afraid of them, we are at least always making a conscious effort to impress them. We act differently around people of the opposite sex than we would with our friends.”

Mr. Wygant said that we should avoid constantly trying to impress, and instead just be ourselves. We should treat members of the opposite sex like they are our friends, not someone you are desperately trying to gain the attention of. The rest of the lecture explained just how to do that.

First, he explained to the ladies in the audience just how darn simple men are. He described every man as “a giant Scooby Doo on steroids,” which actually got a laugh from both the girls and the guys listening.

Still using the dog comparison, he said that women are like chew toys to men. He said that his Labrador retriever could be dead asleep, but as soon as he heard the squeak of that chew toy, he immediately woke up and wanted to play with it. Just like when guys see a girl they are attracted to, they immediately want some sort of contact with her.

Dogs always notice when their chew toy comes out. Just like men, who ALWAYS (he stressed always) notice girls. Always. Period.

“Ladies,” he said, “if you catch a guy looking at you for more than a few seconds, he’s interested and wants to talk to you.”

He continued, “Every single time guys go anywhere, and I mean anywhere, they are always looking for or at girls.”

Then, he asked the question that was probably already floating around the heads of every girl in the audience: If guys are always looking for and noticing girls, then why don’t they approach more often?

He answered it, saying that no one likes rejection – if girls don’t give them a reason to approach, then they are not going to.

“If all you do is smile and then stare up at the sky or down at your shoes when you walk by, forget it. You can’t be coy if you want the boy. Call them out on staring at you! Say something, Even if it’s just, ‘hello.’”

He said that all guys like when girls make the first move to say hi. It impresses their friends, who are probably watching from a distance and it takes a little of the pressure off of them. Also, he stressed the importance of confidence. Sixty percent of communication is non-verbal, so act confident, even if you have to fake it.

Approaching a girl or a guy is the hardest part, but once that’s over with, what’s next? This is when Mr. Wygant began to cover the topic of flirting.

“Flirting is all about observation, not pick up lines,” he said.

He said that when talking to members of the opposite sex, you should use what’s around you. If they are getting a scone at Starbucks, ask which kinds are good. If you are both at the grocery store looking at cereal, talk about that.

Or, just say what you’re thinking. If the girl smells good, just tell her. He says that when talking to members of the opposite sex you have to present who you are. They will either like it or they won’t.

Everyone has a specific type that they are attracted to. Maybe you’re it. Maybe you’re not. Respect what others are looking for, both physically and emotionally. This brought him to the next topic of discussion: “hooking up.”

Mr. Wygant urges all of his clients to be honest from the beginning of what they want, romantically speaking. He says that if one person is interested in a relationship, and all the other person is interested in is hooking up, then respect that and move on.

But he also says that you should never tell someone that you are looking for a relationship, just so you can hook up with them.

Perhaps the wisest thing that was said during his lecture was, “You don’t find love by placing goals on yourself. You find it by getting to know as many people as possible.”

After about 2 1/2 hours of “dating talk,” I feel like an expert. Maybe now I can actually give my friends educated advice about dating, instead of always beginning with, “Well when I dated so-and-so this is how…”

Now I can start with, “David Wygant says…”

If you have a question or need some advice from David Wygant and you want a personalized answer, you can contact him by visiting his Web sites www.alwaystalktostrangers.com or www.davidwygant.com and sending him an e-mail.