Home Is Where The Romance Is

The Star Ledger

February 1, 2006

By LISA IRIZARRY

Go to Victoria’s Secret and buy lingerie.
Make dinner reservations.
Get an outfit for going out to a fancy meal.

If that sounds like your checklist for creating a romantic environment for Valentine’s Day, chuck it, advises a master at the love game.

David Wygant, author of the dating advice book, “Always Talk to Strangers” (Penguin Group, $13.95 paperback), says you’ve got the wrong idea if you think old standbys work best for what’s supposed to be the most romantic day of the year.

“The standards are just that – the norm, nothing unusual. They’ve been done and done and done again,” the 43-year-old Wygant says.

Give them a rest and get creative – and by all means stay at home. Being at home is not only convenient if you get lucky and the romantic mood turns into more, it allows for more options for a Valentine’s Day you’ll both remember as really special.

“If you have kids, send the kids to their grandparents’ house that night and make a special night for your wife or your husband,” Wygant says. “If you’re younger or you live with roommates, have the person meet you at a hotel, and you get there 15 minutes ahead of time to set things up.”

Wygant considers himself the real-life version of the character “Hitch” in last year’s romantic comedy of the same name. In the film, Will Smith plays a dating consultant who coaches romantically challenged men in wooing their dream women, and the Los Angeles-based Wygant says that he’s been making a career out of just that for the past six years.

The self-described international “dating agent” says he can teach both sexes everything they need to know to get ready to jump into the dating pool, from how they should look to arranging parties. If you have $10,000 to spare, he’ll even move into your house to give you the ’round the clock treatment and three months of follow-up advice.

Wygant says his expertise on love comes from his longtime reputation among friends and acquaintances as the guy who always knows how to get the girl.

“I teach my clients how to market themselves,” Wygant explained, noting he would be speaking today to Rutgers University students about his romantic techniques. He has been living with his girlfriend for five years and says he knows what it takes to spice things up for a valentine.

“I really believe in doing things off the cuff and doing things differently,” he says. “Valentine’s Day is a Hallmark holiday,” he adds. “You go to Victoria’s Secret and you buy dumb lingerie and you go out and pay $150 for a meal that you could have had for $75 bucks the next day.”

His advice: “Deliver” romance to your loved one in your home if you live together, or have your Valentine’s Day celebration at your house or theirs. Cater to the person to show your love.

For guys, tell the object of your desire to dress in “something incredibly sexy and beautiful,” and cook an intimate meal – or get takeout if you can’t cook, Wygant suggests. Set a beautiful candlelit table with your love’s favorite foods. The point is to create the romantic mood with the unexpected.

“If she’s in a beautiful dress, you should be in something casual like a pair of jeans and a great sweater – there’s something very sexy about that – very subservient about that,” he explains. “She’s put up there like a queen, and you’re this common guy serving her this incredible meal.”

Or put a slightly different spin on it. The lovebirds can be dressed up to go out to dinner, and then one can surprise the other with a picnic to be enjoyed at home. “Have a picnic on the floor with candles, champagne, wine …” Wygant says. Add a basket of massage oils and a long, sensual massage … maybe with a peppermint massage oil. “You don’t need to go out,” Wygant adds. “Make a romantic evening at home and make sure everything is presented properly.”