I’m about to show you the most powerful statement that you will ever read in your entire life.
The person you marry will determine your happiness or unhappiness for the rest of your life.
For those of you who are married and in a loving, beautiful partnership, someone that supports you as a best friend, someone that understands exactly who you are…
You understand the power of that sentence.
For those of you who have been married and divorced, you also understand the power of that sentence.
You understand through all the turmoil, you understand how you both negotiated things, how you both spoke to each other, how you did not support one another, how it showed and played off on the kids.
And the kids. In a bad marriage, the kids sense everything, so what do they do? They go on and do what?
They take on all the relationship patterns of their parents, the arguments, and everything else, and then they relive it in their own arguments. I can go deep into how bad marriages affect kids for the remainder of their life because I was a part of a bad marriage. I was part of people who did not talk to one another, so I learned how to sweep things under the rug. It became one of the things I needed to work on as an adult.
I’m going to say it again: The person you marry will determine your happiness or unhappiness for the rest of your life.
For those of you who are single right now —
Stay single. Find somebody who inspires you to be the best version of you.
Find somebody who loves and adores you and doesn’t want to change you, but wants to support and help you.
Take your time. Find somebody who is your best friend, who’s going to be your best friend.
Because the person that you marry will determine your happiness or unhappiness for the rest of your life.
There is no escape from a bad marriage except leaving that bad marriage. Staying in a bad marriage for the sake of the kids means that you are going to be miserable for years and years and years to come.
Staying at the office late, going out with friends, drinking alcohol on a Friday or Saturday night to numb the pain.
Let me tell you something, I’ve seen these marriages. I have watched them unfold, and I have coached people after they’ve been physically and emotionally beaten up for a long stretch of time.
For those of you who are not married, take it seriously. Think about your partner, think about what you want. Think about who you’re going to meet. Think about what you want, what you desire in a relationship.
Allow yourself the time to get to know somebody slowly. Listen to their words, watch their actions, see how they conduct their day to day life before you go into any story or fantasy about them.
See how they react to everything, because once you commit to them, all those reactions and everything will be in your house, your space, your time, and shared with you.
Dating is evaluating, and evaluating is okay. Stay out of the romantic story, the story about how you’re going to have a great marriage because your parents did. Stay out of the programming. All this stuff is deep stuff that we don’t think about.
We spend more time looking for our careers, working on our careers, learning how to communicate in our careers than we do when it comes down to dating and love. We’re out of balance as a society.
Love is the thing that keeps us real and happy and supportive, and actually makes us a lot more money and success because having a great partner to take good care of you and have your back means that you’ll always have somebody by your side.
For those of you who want to really pick and have a great girlfriend or boyfriend and future partner, I strongly suggest you join me at my Love Blueprint Seminar.
Because this is what we talk about. Partnerships and love.
Picking the right person, avoiding the people that aren’t for you. Call it the best dating insurance you’ll ever buy in your entire life.
And make sure that when you have that dating insurance, you bring somebody along with you because I’m allowing that. You join, you buy, they come for free. Check it out.