You Have Nothing To Complain About
October 22, 2009 
19 Comments
I get emails all the time from people who tell me how rotten their life is because they cannot meet people. My response is always, “That’s easy to fix! Try driving in L.A. traffic. You can’t do a thing about that.”
Los Angeles is a combination of a lot of things: sunshine, overpopulation . . . and the worst drivers you’ve ever seen. Overpopulation breeds bad drivers, because when you far too many people living in a small area you are bound to get a collection of the world’s worst drivers
.
Los Angeles is not actually a tiny area, but it feels like it is because you can’t get anywhere. It’s like an old movie with not-so-great special effects where the people traveling in cars pass by the same scenery over and over again. That’s what it’s like living in Los Angeles.
Everyone who lives in Los Angeles has a driving horror story. Mine? One time it took me 2½ hours to get to a Lakers game. To give you an idea how close I lived to the arena, it took me only seventeen minutes to get home. To put this in perspective, when I lived in Colorado I could drive 170 miles in 2½ hours.
So, anyone who is complaining about not being able to approach members of the opposite sex needs to come to Los Angeles and get behind the wheel of a car. You’ll never see approaching as being frustrating and intimidating ever again!
People will tell you that to deal with L.A. traffic, all you need is good music and a cell phone. I’m thinking that instead of good music and a cell phone, you really need a bullhorn and a shotgun, because I really like kick back on the sofa listening to music to relax. As for talking on my cell phone, I really don’t want to talk on the phone while I am screaming at people in traffic.
You have approach anxiety? No problem! I’ll tell you what. If I can figure out how to get through L.A. traffic, I’ll show you in five minutes how to meet members of the opposite sex.
David, this is hillarious … and unfortunately that picture could have been taken any Monday through Friday between 2:00 and 7:00 pm!!!
Great blog to get you to stop taking the approach thing so seriously. Thanks man!
omg…..is it really like that in LA? I was thinking about moving there, but after i hear about the earthquake, fire and the taxes are high as hell…..tell me what is the age expectancy in LA?
hey Ted- are you from LA?
I agree nothing more frustrating then the traffic! I wonder what are they really going to do about it?
And about aproach anxiety….how can i get rid of it more?
howe- when you thinking about moving? its not that bad howe no way like hell:0
Hey John,
If you’re getting too nervous around women i would recommend you start to relax your mind/body more….try meditation/yoga.
You are thinking way too much, they monkey chatter is killing your energy!
You are right Jocob! The monkey chatter is too painful like the LA traffic:) I will try mediation, it worked for me in the past, i don’t know why i stopped??
very funny John but ya get into meditation you already seen improvement in the past from what i hear!!!
John- i plan to move there when coach Jacob moves:)
hahhaha howe I dont’ think that will happen anytime soon although I really enjoy California!
everytime someone mentions la traffic i always tell the following story. my brother is a civil engineer (they are the guys who make decisions about traffic patterns) and he told me a while ago that la had to make curb parking more dangerous just to make the rest of la driving safer.
in any other city, the distance between curb and the first parking spot is much farther than in la. the reason for that is, the engineers and city planners in charge of traffic patterns decided that they would cut curb space in half to allow an average of two more cars to park on the street than is acceptable in other cities. it causes more curb accidents, because your visibitity is reduced by the extra cars parked where your line of site would go. the science behind it is, if there were two less cars able to park on the road per city block, there would be two more cars out on the road looking for a parking spot causing EVEN MORE traffic than what is out there now. take the cars off the road and you help eleviate the problem at the expense of the small fender benders caused by not having a safe line of sight to the end of the curb.
and la traffic is still really bad.
the photo david used is not even the worst freeway here. add another two lanes of gridlock and you have the 405; one of the consistently worst freeways in the US.
Coach Jacob,
Not big into meditation and yoga …
Wondering what you can do when you’re in the moment and the woman you want to approach is right in front of you. How do you calm approach anxiety in the moment??
How about women who have approach anxiety. I’ve been told that women should know how to attract men to approach them, and should not do the approaching. True??
False Barbara.
Ted-
Its all about practicing, and observing. Just say hello to everybody, be sincere, and it will become natural. The woman you want to approach is one of those people you randomly say hello to. Dont approach her any different, engage in casual conversation and watch the magic happen, naturally! Hope that helps.
hahahahahahaha/// oh yeah, try the traffic here in the philippines, ESPECIALLY the highways and Manila. My goodness… rush hour is worse here that you would need to walk your asses back home. Oh and David… you WILL need a shotgun and bullhorn. You haven’t even seen the types of drivers here in the Philippines… jeepney drivers, taxi drives, truck drivers, ignorant drivers, tricycle drivers… it’s really really crazy here. So if you ever decide to drive here in the Philippines… brace yourself and get ready to explode.
tried, tested & true… It really is as simple as going up to someone with a smile on your face and introducing yourself… A wonder what messes our minds can create when we allow them to
Ted,
How about you don’t ask how you approach her without anxiety and you just do it?
Nike says it right: “just do it!”
When you stop thinking about it being a big deal, it stops being a big deal.
When you are hungry and go open your fridge, do you hesitate, do you feel anxious about opening the fridge? NO!!! B/c it’s normal and natural for you.
You need to change the way you perceive what approaching women really mean.
Approaching and talking to women is NORMAL. It’s part of you being a social creature.
Stop thinking it’s a big event… or it’s THE event of your life because she is hot… or she could be your future g/f… or whatever. Stop putting so much pressure on such a simple act.
It’s normal to just talk to a girl. Just do it… and you might realize… what was the anxiety all about? It doesn’t exist!