You Asked Her Out . . . You Pay!

Recently I was on the phone with a female client of mine, so recently in fact that it feels like right now! The bottom line is: If you ask a woman out on a date, you pay!
I’ve heard from so many women that a guy will ask her out on a date, and then when it comes down to paying he will ask her to split the bill. I believe that first dates should be simple dates, i.e., coffee dates, a walk in the park, things that don’t cost a lot of money.
You don’t know this person, so why should you invest a lot of money in someone you may never see again?! Men who take women they don’t even know for an expensive dinner on a first date are idiots! Trust a woman with your mind . . . not with the food that’s being served across the table.
When dating, the proper etiquette is he or she who asks out the other foots the bill. I’m a firm believer in equality.
I do not believe when dating somebody that the man has to pay for everything so that a woman can build up her 401K. There comes a point in dating where things should be split, especially if both of you are making equal money.
Now if you’re a man who has a lot of money and you’re dating a woman who has little money, then if you don’t pay for a date you’re a cheap bastard and you don’t deserve to have any woman go out with you! If you’re a woman who makes a lot of money and you expect a man to pay for everything, then you’re self-centered and not participating in a real relationship based on equality and understanding of ones financial situation.
The bottom line is this: If you ask somebody out on a date, you pay the bill. If you can’t afford the dinner, take her out for coffee, take her out for a drink, or take a walk in the park. You’re looking for the perfect match . . . not someone who’s going to get you into debt!
Ok Ladies lets hear your thoughts and don’t hold back!!! And guys how do you feel when a woman pays?
Also lets talk today about some great non traditional first dates so the bank account is not depleted to zero while trying to meet someone. Some men just don’t have any creativity so lets help them out!!!
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david, i’ve away told people the samething. personally i like to keep the frist date short and sweet, go for coffee, a walk,etc. who want to sit and watch people chew food. i say keep the first date short 20 or 30minutes, unless your really contacting go longer… because who wants to spend and hour or more with someone you have nothing in common with. thats a nightmare.
cheers,
Joe
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I agree with this advice. Every relationship I’ve had has been different when it comes to who pays, because it depends on what the balance of income is. So if I’m dating a guy that always pays, I make dinner, I come up with “free” tickets to a concert somewhere, I plan romantic picnics or something. If I’m dating a guy and the income is more even, paying for myself is what I do. I’ve also been in situations where I was the one who paid most of the time, because I was the one with a job, while he was going to school full time . . .
The problem I’m running into now, is my boyfriend prefers to eat out way more than I do and he is “left over” averse and he makes a lot more than I do so he pays most of the time. . . while you might think “hey, not a problem if he’s paying” except that . . . I cringe when I know he could be saving that money for something else. And I also end up spending more than I would if I were single, because I’m also paying for myself more often. Hmmmm something to talk about with him!
The most non-traditional first date that I’ve ever had was going to a an interactive art installation that was at a friend of mine’s art studio, and getting buried alive with my date, for 15 minutes, on purpose.
Although other non-traditional, low cost dates
- going to the Getty- gorgeous views and scenery.
- going on a hike during the day, if safety is a concern make it a well traveled area
- a picnic in the park or at the beach
- Improv, both Second City and I/O West charge about 5$ for some of their shows
- a date to eat ice cream or drink hot cocoa and watch the sun rise/set
- a stroll through The Jurassic Museum of Technology– if weird is your thing
- going to publicly hosted concerts or events, i.e. downtown there are several areas that have live music, for cheap or free
- taking a cooking class together (although that is not that cheap, but you also learn a skill for future dates . . . Hipcooks.com is great for this)
-Huntington Library and Botanical Gardens is free on the first Thursday of every month
- cooking dinner together
- Hollywood Bowl- it has a ton of summer events, and if you want to have a picnic and are cool with sitting far away, it is another fun venue for dining, entertainment and getting to know each other.
- if you both have friendly dogs (or even one of you does and the other likes dogs too) take a trip to the puppy park– because when you’re dating someone, their pets are usually part of the package.
- Elixer near the bodhi tree on Melrose, is a nice tranquel and relaxing place to get to know each other over a cup of health enhancing tea as well.
- Volunteer– get a date to volunteer somewhere, feeding the homeless, at Habitat for humanity– it sort of impedes getting to talk too much, but you can talk about it later
The point of a first (and second, and third) date is to get to know each other. Do you want to spend more time with this person and vice versa.
I also have a few ideas for non-traditional dates that are more expensive . . .
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Great minds think alike, Dave.
We just discussed this very thing on my blog last week.
Keep up the insightful work. Excellent comments from your readers, as usual.
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“-Huntington Library and Botanical Gardens is free on the first Thursday of every month”
This Lexi is an awesome idea. I love Huntington beach. If I do come back home, this will probably be where I plant it…lol..no pun intended on that one.
I believe a woman should be happy to shell out some moulah here and there when it comes to dating. I am by no means experienced nor a pro at this thing called “dating,” but I do think the sharing is fair.
If I may elaborate on the “equality” of the sexes. This is my own personal perspective, so if any feminist reads this, please respect my thoughts and feelings here, because I am by no means looking to put anyone in a superior nor inferior light here. This is just how I see through my eyes.
As for equal earning potential in same job positions, I think that is fair, but will have a dependance on seniority, which hopefully has been assigned fairly to the due canidate–male or female. Paying for dates;ladies, it doesn’t hurt us to pitch in. Planning of the date itself; I think if you are the “inviter,” it only makes sense you have plans or a few options in mind to throw on the table for bid. This should be (but isn’t always) common sense thinking.
Switching the gears a little on this same subject line, what else falls in line here? Well, I am a woman. I like to be treated as such. I come from a mentality and raising that a gentleman opens your car door for you, opens the door letting you in first, pulls out your chair etc. May sound old fashioned, but I think it is a very sexy trait in a man, and makes a woman feel as a woman should.
I was walking with a friend when in California. Something that impressed me about him from the get go were his mannerisms. The one that struck me most, was the fact he made sure I was not walking next to the street. More than once he gently guided me to the inside of him and the sidewalk. That made me feel a sense of safety and protection. It is one of those things that he might think went unnoticed, but it was very noticed and more appreciated.
SOOO, guys, when you take a woman out make her feel like a woman, and ladies we need to let the man know we appreciate even the smallest of gesture. Like I said, I am not an expert, but I am human and I do know MANners count!
Thank you “Mr. MANners!”
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Over the course of any relationship, I think there needs to be equity for there to be happiness. The tricker problem is who pays at the start of a relationship.
I have had women offer to pay before and I always let them, but it always sort of bothered me to be honest. It sort of sends the message that they don’t want to feel like they ‘owe’ me anything, and I also end up feeling like a pushover for just letting them pay. I tend to agree with Evan where he says that the safe bet for the man is to simply always pay on the first date.
But the best answer might be David’s: on early dates do things that don’t cost any money at all.
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Ah! I haven’t been to the Huntington museum since I was a kid. (My parents transplanted me up here in no man’s land when I was a teenager. I tried to go back to LA after high school, but I used to sit in my car in the hills of Sierra Madre-forget what “forest” that is and look at scrubby pine trees crying and wishing I was back in the redwoods) Actually I like the idea of taking your pets out. I am home to stray kids and just about every stray animal in the world. So taking the pets out is an awesome idea. Sometimes if he’s brave enough I take him out in the jeep to a beach where you can still drive your vehicle on the beach. I usually take my time before I do that one though cause you have to run your tires with little pressure and its about six miles of pavement to the nearest filling station to air them back up. I don’t yet have an air compressor for the jeep, but maybe I’ll put it on my Christmas wish list.
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Lexi, you remind me of myself, I also eat out waaaay more than most people do…and when I cook its usually an extravangant meal. Thats just the way I am.
Question for the guys on here…Do you trust a woman’s food? I dunno for me I have trouble trusting a woman when she says she’s going to cook for me, in my experience many woman can’t cook….other than mundane ordinary types of meals.
I’ll never forget a woman telling me she makes macaroni and cheese completely in the microwave, I’m not talking about reheating the macaroni and cheese, I’m talking about the first time she makes it, it’s totally done in the microwave….totally disgusting!
I’ll always say a woman knows I respect if….
A. She can cook for me
B. She can buy me clothes
Keep in mind…I’m still a total clueless newbie with women, but those are some thoughts I have thus far….
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Tim:
The last time I made dinner for a man . . . I made osso bucco. Some of my favorite things to make are . . . garlic mashed potatoes, leg of lamb with rosemary & garlic, parsnip vegetable medely, stuffed mushrooms, . . . I would never make mac & cheese for a “date”. Eek! And I would never want to date anyone that prefered mac & cheese to real food! It just isn’t a good match! (Don’t get me wrong, I do eat mac & cheese now and then, and even grilled cheese . . . but not often.)
And although I made lamb and osso bucco, I leave all of the other red meat cooking up to the man. Because RED MEAT is a man’s job.
I decided to learn how to cook when I spent four months in England and really didn’t like a lot of what I was eating . . . and it didn’t help that I didn’t know that I liked Indian food when I was there!
What are some of your favorite things to cook, Tim?
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Personally, due to the time involved, in preparing a repast, I think the best thing to make for dinner is reservations. I cooked and cleaned and whatevered for twenty years for several other folks that I loved and some that I still do love, so I’d have to say unless there is a big-ass shiny rock on my finger from said man, it probably aint gonna happen. Aside from that I’d much rather prepare breakfast or figure out what to do with freshly caught salmon.
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Oh well, this Blog is easy for me. He pays, everytime, for everything. From room service to the menu with no prices, the limo, the tickets to the Opera, Theatre, my clothes and whatever else I want.
I never miss my mark.
I create lavish dishes in his kitchen wearing his best dress shirt and nothing else. He eats blindfolded whatever I hand feed him. I bathe him, oil him down and after I pleasure him, I make sure his dreams are of nothing and no one else but me.
In the morning, his coffee is made and to the left of his china cup is a note:
Thank You Darling, You were delish. You needn’t call me again.
And as he wipes the sleep from his eyes, I’m already onto my next mark.
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Faryn
Wow…..quick question.
Would you consider yourself a gold digger?
You described a very escort kind of night…..your mark…what you get out of it.
You also give a great night for the guys money so its a win win for all. I am not the type of guy who would go for your type….but I know a ton of guys who love that night as you described.
Thanks for being honest and sharing yourself….I respect people who are honest and a bit against the grain!!!!
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Amazing!
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Hey Jessica
Yes all types of people in this world and that is what makes life so interesting.
I dont judge her life choices…..I just choose who i hang with and so do you!!
By the way….You are back and i had no idea what the glitch was.
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Faryn;
Lol Dang! Ok if you feel comfy with that??
Hey I will wear the shirt, tits peeking out, high heels—the works. I’ll blindfold feed, fondle and fuck, bathe his ass IN THE OIL. and guarantee once his member is in my mouth—his mind is mine;)– but to demand all that is a bit on the “much” side for me. Don’t you ever see it that way?
Maybe thats where I am going wrong, hugh? lol
Shit, I basically (honestly! I did) DID do this stuff for many years. It was appreciated at times, but never enough for MY NEEDS to matter.
Well, lol, you are one of honesty for sure. I hope life continues to be so accomodating for you. I just don’t have a heart of golddigger in me to have the man pay pay pay, even though he is getting his play play play:)
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Well, I sort of get the not wanting to see him again, but the other part just seems bought. Seems kind of hollow. Don’t want to be judgmental cause if it works for you, no worries. I just wonder how long it works for….
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I love to grill outside a lot…countless recipes
I also preparing classic italian, chinese, thai and japanese meals
I make a really good drunken noodles…
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Very interesting replies from all, thank you. I have my own money and plenty of it. My own business, my own home, I’m educated and worked hard all my way through College. Oh, and not on my back or hands and knees either. My family is wealthy but my Father believed everyone made their own way. And I have.
Golddigger? Oh, I hope so! I love money, value it, respect it and take care of it. Is that a crime here? Anywhere? Siver, Copper, Gems, I enjoy minerals and rocks. I invest, I’ve lost, I’ve won. I have fun, I live and enjoy travel and all the opportunities that interest me. Don’t all of you?
I’m not ready for a one on one relationship with one man, because I want that with many men. Why not? I enjoy Men. They enjoy me. I spend freely on my Men because it is fun, they in turn spend freely on me. I know immediately if my mark is a one time gig, but I’ve also been involved in several long term affairs. There are many levels of Love and Respect.
I’m not a Whore, it that is what any of you are assuming. High priced or otherwise. I am a Woman who loves a certain caliber of Men and they adore me.
David, I and my mark share a depth of relationship – believe it or not – and one that is mutually consenting I might add – that most only read about in the dark of night in steamy novels, or sitting on the john flipping pages of magazines. Type? And just what type do you imagine I am?
You certainly don’t know me. Otherwise, you wouldn’t be so quick … to label. But perhaps, you are just quick period. And quick is certainly not my type.
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What time should I be there Tim? lol…What sort of beverage goes well with drunken noodles?
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Tim;
What are drunken noodles? Sound a bit limp to me. LOL I am sorry I could not resist.
Really seriously, what are drunken noodles?
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I’m blonde so I can say this….
Did I sense a neg here?
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dang, i’m not blond but i ditto joan; what the heck are drunken noodles?
tim, you don’t trust a woman’s cooking? well what about your mama’s?
one of the funniest and funest (is that spelled right? had a few beers here and i’m not so clear) nights i’ve ever had was with a guy slinging all kinds of stuff around the kitchen seeing what we’d come up with in the pan. turned into using every pan. course the kitchn was a disaster but neither one of us got food poisoned. i can’t even remember what we ate, but i do remember it was fun. so who cared?
limp noodles .. well derrr joan, hardeeharharhar
xo
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Faryn;
For the record book here, I surely don’t view you as a whore, so please clear me from that one. I have already gotten my butt chewed up, spit out stomped on and thrown to the dogs—that was just in one post! Then there is life outside these walls. This is not my month for sure.
I think you have your preference and my motto—after open mouth insert foot—is to each his/her own. I just know it isn’t for me–just the sexual side of it is my pleasure. Don’t want to lose a new friend in a day over an assumption:)
Tim:
You sound like a fantastic cook. I have calmed my inner freak here, so if I offended I am sorry.
I really do want to know how you make drunken noodles.
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LOL Taleda you following me? Oh I guess I am second here hugh LOL.
LOL Ok close the bar! No more beer for Miss T.
Now we are never gonna see Tim or his limp–I mean drunken noodles. OMG Get me off htis blog! LMAO I made a boo boo NO I AM NOT DRINKING! H2O for me tonight!
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shit, i’m just trying to keep up … so many blogs, so many comments, so little time. no more beer only had 2 3 no 2. yeah 2. whatever.
ok. so i’m going to goodle limp drunken noodles and see what the heck pops up … if tim’s picture is there i’m gonna fall off my chair ..
oh god, is it a full moon or is it just my ass as i bend over and kiss it goodby. wheres my pillow???
been one long ass day. whew!
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bloody HELLLLLL … i meant do a google search … joan you are rubbing off on me!
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Hey, Tim,
What indeed are drunken noodles? We all here want to know!
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Ok, Joan. For you!
Drunken Noodles.
2 14-ounce packages 1/4-inch-wide flat rice noodles*
1/4 cup vegetable oil
12 garlic cloves, chopped
1/4 cup chopped fresh Thai chiles*
1 1/2 pounds ground chicken
1/4 cup fish sauce (nam pla or nuoc nam)*
1/4 cup black soy sauce*
1/4 cup Golden Mountain sauce* or light soy sauce
1 tablespoon sugar
4 large plum tomatoes, each cut into 6 wedges
4 Anaheim chiles or Italian frying peppers, or 2 green bell peppers (about 12 ounces total), cut into strips
1/2 cup fresh Thai basil leaves* or regular basil leaves
There isn’t a drop of alcohol in this dish
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Here for heavens sake!! I hope you all enjoy it.
Sorry Taleda – I couldn’t stand the suspense any longer.
And by the way, thank you for the compliment about me being a Jag. Black has always been my favorite color.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
There isn’t a drop of alcohol in this dish
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I think I blew any chance of noodles being revealed tonight!
) O
Pun pun pun! Help me!!! I want to know the noodles!
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damn!! see what happens when i go to the little girls room?
looks like you ladies went to the same place. was tim’s picture there? ok, nuff on poor tim.
hey joan, you up for cooking a batch? i’m thinking to try it this weekend. we’ll compare notes.
and Faryn you may not like it quick but damn girl, you sure hit the search engine like one on fire. and with jessica right on your heels … i smelled the smoke all the way up to the potty.
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Faryn saves the day! lol
I am taking it you are aquainted with the “drunken noodle?” Lol Oh I need to get noodle slapped! Can we sustitute the word “noodle?” Or does the recipe have to have the noodle?! LOL
OMG I think I am sleep deprived.
David: Can you give me a hint on tomorrows blog content?
Hold the noodles! LOL
OOOOO someone help me crawl out of this trench I have dug throughout his night? Just toss me a noodle! LOL
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oh hell, honey you need a bone …
as do i.
i’m gonna ask one more time; anybody know what happened to that sweet boy jesse james?
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LOL LMAO Ok First I have no noodle to speak of, now they are cumming at me from all sides!!!
I’ll never eat spaghetti again without thinking of this blog day! LOL
great, I will attempt the recipes one at a time! lol Thank you
You have wett my noodle! LOL
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Jesse James? I say where is the keeper of “the sand box?”
Kitty litter is gettin full her and needs some cleanin! LOL
Yea I hear y’all! i am the first “scoop of the poop” out of here.
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Faryn
You are being honest and I respect that!!!
I just wanted you to go deeper and clarify your words.
I am also single now and my marks….well enough about me I am finding you one interesting woman.
Thanks for the posts/
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ohhhhh, see didn’t i tell you … David is one of the best fur strokers around.
he pushed me too .. and i pushed back. much to my regret but i learned oh so very much since then. it was painful but learning sometimes is.
course, he can still rile me worse than any man ever has … but i promised him i wouldn’t get bitchy again and i am working very hard at keeping my promise. duct tape at the ready!
well, this kitty is off to do some productive online work, so i’ll leave you all for now.
play nicely in the sandbox tonight and may everybody have pleasant dreams.
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I’ve made another interesting observation, though perhaps I’m not the only one?
Joan = Tiger Taleda = Lion newly anointed Me = Jaguar
Taleda refers to herself and Joan and now me as Kitty or Kitties.
And this arena, she calls the sandbox, or more specifically Big D’s sandbox.
My interpretation is that sandbox = kitty litter
And that I find very humerous. Bonne nuit mesdames et messieurs.
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Brutal Honesty… I LOVE IT…
You’ve got to give it to someone that KNOWS EXACTLY what they want…
Oh, and for the record… I never mind paying… even if she asks me out. However, I do draw the line when I feel that it’s “expected”…
As long as the gesture’s appreciated… I’m fine.
But, I do like “the race” to see who can get to their credit card first at the end of a meal or event… for some strange reason… I find it incredibly sexy.
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I would make sure my knots are good and tight.
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Kitties and sandboxes…ick. Sorry but I have to do a lot of scooping, and that stuff is just not appealing. Yins, can keep the feline grace. I’ll stick with being the tomboy.
As to the race for the card, well that’s just all in good fun isn’t it? I have protested, but honestly feel like a pushover if I’ve asked him and I don’t beat him to the check or if I know that my income is greater. One thing I’ve noticed that is a very good gauge of a man is how he tips and treats wait staff. Having had a couple of really crappy service jobs back in the day, I can say it means a lot to me to be kind to the people who take care of my needs.
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I doubt any of you can afford me.
Oh well, perhaps for coffee. I prefer it in Paris. With lots of thick cream. Taleda was indeed right about that …
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Faryn….Your OK just as your are!!! I to like my 1/2 and 1/2 and I would always get you yours…….:) Funny!
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David!! All these smart, strong, confident, sexy indepedent woman!!! Now thats HOTS….. Always better to have them smarter……
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My suggestions for the guys for a first interesting and unique date: the zoo is usually around $10-15 per adult, going to an ice cream shop, going to play video games at the arcade, going to play miniature golf and one of my all time favorites (that is for a first date that lasts about 1 hour or longer, you choose): going roller skating! I am 5′1″ and have had 6′3″ men on the roller rink. We both had fun and left with a smile on our faces from laughing very hard.
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Good kelly, keep it simple. Simple pleasures. Like thick cream for my coffee in Paris with Faryn!!! Then someone bumps me and i found myself day dreaming at Starbucks. Dang it Faryn……see! now i’m a mess. LOL!
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I’d lick your creamy mess but for two little things:
Starbucks is disgusting expensive fat producing slop
and
It’s too crowded for what I have in mind.
Oh, just so you’d feel safe; I’ll buy. I grind my own every morning.
Now, good night.
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re. Faryn & David’s comments
I was a bit too shy to submit this when David requested a summer sizzle story but I recently had an experience similar to Faryn’s and it was a real turn-on.
I bumped into a 26 y.o. Russian girl here in London. There’s a lot of Eastern Europeans in London these days and the women have a bit of a reputation as being on the hunt for rich husbands. I saw her eyes light up when I said what I did for a living and she was keen to get my number. Girls like that are definitely not my type for a long-term relationship – I prefer someone who’s more intellectually my equal – but she was fun and very attractive so I agreed to take her out.
On the date I treated her like a princess, paying for everything and taking her to fine a restaurant, top club, champagne, buying her what she wanted, etc. In return, she treated me like a king – she couldn’t do enough to please me. We had a huge amount of fun all the way through to breakfast.
It was a major turn on for her to be treated like that, and a major turn on for me to have someone so willing to look after me and act like she absolutely adored me. I spent maybe $800 on that date and it was worth every penny.
She knows I don’t see her as serious girlfriend material but maybe I’ll take her out again just because it was so much fun.
In my long-term relationships I want a true “partner” – someone who’s intellectually, culturally & financially my equal.
But there’s also something very attractive about having the opportunity to act like an old-fashioned gentleman and to be able to treat your date as an old-fashioned lady (although without the old-fashioned inhibitions, please).
It doesn’t set the stage for a relationship of equals but it’s still deeply appealing all the same.
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So what happens to the altruistic, I’m not selling out, money is the last thing that impresses me, tree hugging chicks then Robb?
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@Bertie
The woman of my dreams would love me for who I am, not (just) what I can provide.
Which is why that particular girl is not girlfriend material, even if I could afford to keep her in the manner to which she’d like to become accustomed (which I can’t).
Still, I enjoyed the experience all the same.
Most of the women I see are intelligent, independent, professional types. I do find intelligence very attractive but for many of these women, they are so determined to prove that they are equal that they forget to just allow their man to act like a man, and to act like a lady themselves.
And they are not immune from judging men on income & status either.
A wealthy friend of mine always used to date young women who were clearly only after his sponsorship and he stayed single and emotionally unfulfilled for a long time. Through a friend of mine he recently met a rather dippy, hippy chick who is distinctly unimpressed with his house & money and he’s fallen completely head-over-heels with her. However, I note that she does allow him to pay for most things just because he’s more able to but she’d be really embarrassed being taken to a posh restaurant.
Judging from your comments elsewhere, you’re probably in the reverse situation. The men you meet are so backward in their ways that they don’t allow you to show that you’re a modern woman.
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Robb;
“but for many of these women, they are so determined to prove that they are equal that they forget to just allow their man to act like a man, and to act like a lady themselves.”
That statement speaks volumes with me. That is the point I was trying to make as well. I want to feel like a woman at all times, but especially when I am with a man for any reason. It is sexy when a man is a man in my opinion. I only want to be equal to a certain point. When a man acts the man, like my CA friend with the walking incident? That makes a woman feel(this one anyway) attended to and feminine. I like the demure feeling of being a woman and being made to feel as one. In turn, I love to please a man and acknowledge his virility as such. That is priceless.
I used to work in this restaurant when my “love” at 17 was fresh and anew. Every payday this guy from workand I would go cash our checksand he always wanted to buy me lunch. He told my “boyfriend” at the time, “Yea, I don’t mind taking her to lunch, because it never fails, she always orders the least expensive things off the menu.” lol Funny I remember that. Long time ago, but I am still as such to this day. I guess I am a low maintainance kind of lady when it comes to that. I’d rather enjoy the man than the money;)
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This is such a wonderful blog! Always learn something new about life!
Most of men I am dating are business professionals with great jobs, intellectuals, guys with all possible Ivy League degrees. They are usually very boring people and
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Luciano Pavarotti died today
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robb mate, i hear ya, but a cant a bloke get a lass who want to date a man for his mind and personality, rather then his occupation or money. Bertie, Joan tell us lads theres is hope lol
cheers,
Joe
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Joe;
You are a sweet man and worthy of the same in a woman. Robb, you as well from what I read.
Never give up hope.When you do that, you have laid down and let the eneemie of defeat stomp you.
Not me honey! I am up, up, and away!!
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To all my newly acquired Friends;
I’m taking a trip and won’t be around for a while. Have fun, play with each other with Joy …
Taleda and Joan, I leave the sandbox within your capable paws.
May Luciano sing with the Angels …. I shall play the Flower Duet for him.
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blessed be to pavarotti, a voice of passion and a voice of laugh and love.
cheers,
Joe
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pavarotti, wasnt one of my favorite tenors, but he still did alot of the art of opera and the arts in general, he will be missed dearly.
cheers,
Joe
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ciao pavarotti.
cheers,
Joe
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I will miss you Faryn. Think of me when your enjoying your thick cream!
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Bertie what is your email, you can give it to Joan and she would pass it on to me, if you’d like.. i like to get to know you better, i like your style.
cheers,
Joe
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LOVE IS IN THE AIR
bye Faryn, safe journey along your path
me and joan will take care of our sandbox … chat with ya upon your return.
gotta go to work myself … later everybody.
dang, flower duet is one of my favs also … great choice to play for the master voice …
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Robb:
Ah, so your colleague found a nice dippy hippy chick? A home no matter what anyone thinks along with all its contents is a very impermanent thing. At 0830 on February 15, 1994 I had a home five minutes later I had my only child who was not in school in my arms, the clothes on my back, and a locked car I couldn’t get into because the structure was in flames. Its not necessarily what you have but who you have that really counts. I find it rather sad that yuppie (if that term can still be used) females feel the need to prove they are equal. In all that effort in the business professions they are losing a lot of life.
Joe:
Yes, Joe, there is a Santa Claus, and there are lots of us out here who don’t need or want your money. Maybe I better rescind that, I can’t say that if suddenly some rich dead previously unknown to me, relative left me with enough to payoff post-marital debt that I would turn it down. Joe I’d be happy to give you my email. Its just that I don’t know how to do it without just posting it right here and that seems like writing your name and number in the men’s room preceded by the phrase, “For a good time call”
As to the equality subject in general, I suppose when you see people critically ill it gives you a different perspective. I am in a traditionally feminine job, but I am equal to every man I meet, and better than a few I’ve met in the past. That does not mean that I don’ t let you open my door for me or that I would become unhinged if you were to try and protect me, or show you care through gifts. It only means that you do not need to. As the song goes…
“I deserve my propers when you get home…” -Otis Redding
Pavarotti, may you sing with angels…
Sorry if I’m not making a whole lot of sense four hours of sleep just doesn’t cut it.
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berite, ask for Joan email and she well give you mine, like you i really dont want my email on here… Joan shouldnt have a problem with it… she my friend and a dear one at that.
cheers,
Joe
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Faryn;
Take me with you!!! lol Have a nice time wherever it is you go, and be good;)
Bertie:There is a way to get Joe your email:)) Ah ha! Leave it to the investigator in me to solve the mystery of it all:)
David:
Couldn’t Bertie use you as a median to get the email address to Joe? That way it doesn’t have to be published om post? You have all our email addresses so??? Hmmmm damn I am smart;) lol No That is just the cupid in me.;)
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Joan cupids? hold on i dont even think i’m bertie type yet? who knows? i might be too young for her.. i just think she sweet and i would like to get to know her.. and thanks for the help…
Bertie, do you have a my space? you could go on joans my space and email her your email addy that way… or maybe through that blog log you guys use to view davids blogs… anyways, if this is going to be a problem no, worries, we still have the blog…
cheers,
Joe
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LoL Joe! My Space! Why yes I do! Actually I used it frequently when my oldest son thought he’d try living at his dad’s three days a week, but that was pretty short lived because no one in this world loves you unconditionally the way your mother does. Now I know some people will say not mine, and true there are some that are that way, but for most of us, the unconditional love that our mothers have for us is unmatched. So I haven’t been checking my My Space lately, but if you look up Offroadrn, I’ll start checking it more often.
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Oh Joe, btw the youngest man I’ve dated was 23, but generally the men I date are 28-39. I’ve dated a few older men, but most of them are looking for a maid and a cook.
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Joe, lol;
Not to fret now! I just got the bow drawn back here. Arrow is firmly fastened. I ain’t shot no one in the heart yet! LOL LOL Sima down simma down;) Just doin the pre prep work here to try and hit the bulls eye! lol
Hell, I need to shoot my own ass if my arms weren’t so short and I could snap that puppy:)
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Hey, Faryn,
Write to us from your trip! We like you here! LOL
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Joan,
Actually with the bow, the shorter the arms the better your ability to actually draw back. Its all in how you hold the bow! Yeah I have a Matheson (not sure on the spelling just now, I’m a bit fuzzy), I have a spiffy shimada braking reel on a beautiful flexible six foot pole, a wetherby shot gun with a very small serial number, a colt frontier .22, and an old army issue .45. Just so that you all rest assured I’m a female, I have a huge corner of my dining room devoted to my sewing cabinet and the scrapbooking materials. LOL! In general, I’ve just found that men while having more expensive toys they are also the really fun toys.
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Bertie:
You go girl! Sounds like you got the equipment ao what are you waiting for;) Thats cool. we used to shoot growing up and once I got the hang of it—I loved it! Look out Joe;)
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Oh, mama mia….
Joan, the shooting girl, you have so many talents! Every day I discover something new about you!
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look out Joe, no shit, i’m a sally compare to you two… and you might want to save that bow for you Joan, seems bertie has her pigtail puller. so no worries… still working on the email thing. oh well…
cheers,
Joe
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Hey Joe. LOL No no arrow for me. I am kidding with that one.
DAVID: AKA HITCH:
Wad up? This man is waitin on Hitch to intervene and deliver:) If they both consent to the email exchange, where is the hesitation? Bertie r u good with the ehchange of email?
Well, will see what happens there. He might be out Joe, so time and patience is a virtue;) Cheers
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Hitch is on the beach taking the day off!
Tonight he will be glued to the TV screen as the NFL season kicks off.
Will not be home till tomorrow morning so love will be taking the day off today!!
Plus its great build up the anticipation!
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Hey Jessica. What happened to Jessica45?
Girl, there isn’t that much new to know about me. Well, I guess if you don’t really know me—yea there is a wealth no one knows about me.
I certainly am not a marksman at archery, but it is a very fun thing to do. HEY—epiphany!
THAT would make a hilarious first date if you don’t know what you are doing, onlt you stand the risk of somebody ending up in the ER. lol
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David;
Good 4 U! I wondered if you ever took a day off for pleasures sake. Hey enjoy that CA sunshine for me—for now. I just may be hitting my Huntington Beach hangout and trash Puerto Vallarta.
RELAX darlin! You have definitely earned it:) Love will simmer and keep in the meantime.
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Joan, you seem to trying to be hitching me up with bertie, although i’m flattered, it seems that bertie already has her pigtail puller. so i dont think she needs me. i just like what she has to say, beauty and brain is so hard to come by i like to get to know her thats all.
cheers,
Joe
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well Joan get to know her better that is..
cheers,
Joe
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anticipation? potential good times, feelings LIFE in general ain’t no ketchup bottle … you gotta grab the bull by the horns and ride that fucker YEE-HAAAA hold on to the bar!!
gave it to joan and joe already and it’s been sweet sharing privately, we’ve lots in common.
bertie and joe, i’ll be your go-between INITIALLY. if you want, let me know. i don’t have a problem with the two of you having mine.
I’M NOT GIVING PERMISSION FOR ANY BODY ELSE TO USE IT. SO SHOW SOME RESPECT AND HONOR.
anybody out there spams me or other wise LOOK OUT … i don’t like crap in my inbox .. or elsewhere! got enough sand to deal with as it is!
FreedomHorse777@yahoo.com
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Joe:
just trying to help a friendship form, not getcha hitched;)
Umm baby, there is beauty and brains splattered ALL over this page! LOL
Bertie is at the tops of the list:))))
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i know there brains and beauty all other this page, i know a few wonderful women on this page…
bertie, hope to talk to you soon, if not no worries,
cheers,
Joe
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Joan, bertie, do you feel that the night are the loneliness part of the day for you… i sometimes feel like that. i’m sitting here writing, drinking my scotch. think about how lovely it would be to have a owmen to look at the stars with me outside today… soon i hope soon.
cheers,
Joe
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Hi all,
Again lots of interesting things happening in this blog! Do I hear date in the air, and also a great loss for Humanity.
All right even though I have the old fashioned traits of a gentleman, I also lived in places were “going dutch” was a way of living and dating, with no chauvinistic of fenministic after tastes, where dates say “I will pay tonight” and is accepted without a word or if nothing said well dutch it is.
In our western world, we yearn for too many materialistic luxuries and when it starts like this with a date well…… I dont shoot down men who want to inpress young Ladies and treat the like princesses, but when one starts this way, one starts an unpressedented array of settings that may not have started if one would have taken her to a lets say puppet play (laughter of children in the purest form, beautiful) in a park or a petting zoo. I myself am down to earth and do simplistict things with my dates, I love to hikes and discover nature, in todays materialistic world we need to go more picknicking, biking hiking than going to fancy restaurants. This does not only draw one another together but shows one also that you maybe able to battle out obstacles in the future (together).
I like to trat a Lady like a Lady and one can very well show your date this without going to formal or high class dining or dates. Dont take me wrong I have dined in Paris, Rome, Madrid, London etc… and these where not a side cafe type, but the most fun I had was once in Madrid when we asked a local for a good place to eat and he personally took us to a shabby looking dark place and I was in culinary and atmospheric heaven that night, we had fun and my date was very much impress I had the best night of my that year.
So what does this tell you. High class expensive places only if I have too. If not put your boots on were going hiking!!!
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agreed RC i’ve always enjoy my european up bringing, but sometimes it a conflicts with this america culture… in sweden they have a saying
“Lagom ar bast ” basically it means, modesty and moderation is a virtue… no ones better then anyone else… we’ll all equal in some way… material good should matter to nothing…. they can come and go so quickly… but nature and art, they may go, but will always leave a lasting impress in ones heart.
cheers,
Joe
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Joe,
LOL! My pigtail puller is a smart guy and just a few years younger than I am, 39 if I’m doing my math correctly. He is indeed very handsome. He also is like that with absolutely every female from 2 to 100. So that hardly makes me special huh? He is just all in good fun and even if he were to suddenly wake up and find himself attracted to me, I don’t think anything could possibly come of it. His cars are all about speed not character and utility with their power. So no worries on that front. All you have to do Joe, is google the offroadrn, and my myspace page comes up…It has many things you wanted to know about Roberta but were afraid to ask.
As far as loneliness, I don’t usually feel lonely. Sometimes when I am confronted by the others involved in my divorce. My ex is married to his girlfriend and her ex hooked up and married an old family friend. I am the only one alone, but then I think about how I don’t have to be married to be happy. I’m pretty complete on my own.
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87 responses already? David, do you know how to make a post that isn’t open to and leading into heated debates? LOL
I agree, first dates, who ever asked the other out should pay. Unless it happens to be a gal that is very independent and insists on splitting the bill. In that case I split it with her, who knows what rules she had at the time about a guy paying for her dinner on the first date.
As far as what you do on the first date, it depends on how much you know and talked to this person before you actually see them. If it is someone you just met that you know very little about. Coffee or a walk in the park is great. It’s cheap, and the focus is on each other, not the food or movie or whatever you do. For the record, I’m not a big fan of going to movies as the only part of the date (or even to “hang out” with family since you can’t talk during it).
Or if you talk alot via email/myspace/txt/phone for a week or two before you first meet. You have a better idea of what she is like and about, so going to dinner isn’t a bad thing at that point.
After my last gf, one thing that I found to be very important, is having at least one or two “phone dates” where all you do is talk on the phone for a couple hours. I haven’t quite figured it all out, but there is something connection or bonding or something along those lines, that helps a relationship take off.
In college I had a relationship that looked like it wasn’t going to take off at all, but did after a 6 hour phone conversation. My last gf, we never really talked on the phone at all except for her getting lost, and we had more of a fling then dating.
The best part of “phone dates” they are cheap.
unless you go over your cellphone minutes or rack up long distance charges that is.
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Bertie,
I can relate to your friend, for me it used to be all fun and games, and fast cars,,,,,,’till I met a counseling thunder that set me straight on who I am.
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Ah yes. I don’t want you to think he isn’t a good guy, he is. In fact he gave me some very good advice when I told him I was falling apart during the dark days leading up to my ex leaving. He also gave me some very good Xanax, but I had to take more than I was comfortable with taking in order to just show up to work. I’d never gotten all girlie on him every before, pretty much all business, but things were very very bad and to be blunt I wasn’t sure how I could make it through all this, but felt I had to absolutely hang on for the kids would not have done well living with their father who is a guy of convenience and a step-mothe who had already said she would have nothing to do with “his” kids. I couldn’t exactly take a powder but I was having a very difficult time holding myself together. I think actually that his mother has a list of suitable brides for him and eventually he will comply. I’m pretty sure my kinds of girls would not be on that list.
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mmmmhmmm, yes, most of the time, there is no one good enough, for a mothers son/daughter….
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can i join the sandbox?…i can be a panther….i love pumas! i never been on a date…am i showing my age?lol. but i love the park & board games…do i sound like a kid? lol.i agree with sean on phone dates…im usually attracted to someone mentally & im shy, so talking on the phone helps.
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It has been a very very long time since I have been literally caught with my mouth open and nothing to insert ….
Goodness … my face is even on fire.
I read in one of my research marathons that in the family of big cats, the females sometimes eat their own cubs.
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lol…did i do that 2 u? or wat?
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