How To Meet People In A Class Or A Movie

Konstantin

Wednesday, September 7th, 2011

David respect to you,btw great blog.This will be useful to me,cause i'l go to college now.Be open to everyone,smiling have fun,you teach great stuff men.After i heared you first time and saw your blogs my social life has changed totaly.You should give some tips for night life and openers in bar.Thanks

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Shogo (Coach)

Wednesday, September 7th, 2011

Hey Dan, what about the university system makes it inherently flawed? (Not saying I disagree, just want to get your point of view...) Paula, what's the best way for a guy to approach you before/after/in class, and what's a fun casual on-campus first date for him to take you on?

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Shogo (Coach)

Wednesday, September 7th, 2011

Nice advice Paula! Really good actually, boys take note. Class-friends are the best. Guys always think that they have to get in some huge conversation and get a date/phone number right then and there, but in reality you don't need that. You'll see the person again. Start off with little chit-chat, then more talk the next class. Before you know it, you're old friends and it'll be a cinch asking her out. My favorite on campus date? I tell her I'm going to take her out for a 5-course meal after class, get ready. I make sure I have about $10 in 1's. Then I take her to the vending machine in the lobby, buy two sodas, some animal crackers, red vines, pop tarts, trail mix, all sorts of junky snack stuff--we pick it out together--and hang out at one of the tables in the school lobby and have a fun mini-date. Then when the cute mini-date ends, I've set it up for another night of "real" date-oriented fun. :)

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Shogo (Coach)

Wednesday, September 7th, 2011

I was cracking up afterward and while I was shooting the video. I thought it was amusing as hell. Dan, I like what you're saying, I'll have to think about that. Do you think it would be better if there were no majors? I think NYU (where I graduated from) had a major where you could take any class you wanted to as long as you used a part of the curriculum from 12 classes in a final thesis that was coherent. Then again, it was NYU, so it could be whatever crazy stuff you wanted to write about. Then again, college is for losers...

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Shogo (Coach)

Wednesday, September 7th, 2011

@Amy: If there's a guy you like on campus, start talking to him! Just like we discussed, make class-friends with him first and the flirting will come naturally over the next few times you guys talk. Don't worry if it takes him several weeks to come up and talk to you again. It does NOT mean he's ignoring you. If it's a guy you know, walk up, smile, and say what's up right away before or after class. Ask him how the weekend was, bring up the lat thing you guys talked about. Don't wait for him to make the first move. I know it's always better if he would make the first move, but there could be any number of reasons why he's not. You'll never know unless you just start talking to him--you can gauge his interest (or whether he's just nervous/hesitant) from there. Plus you'll avoid a lot of headaches worrying about it!

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Finch

Wednesday, September 7th, 2011

I wish more people on this blog went and got a university education. Maybe then they wouldn't be so closed minded and think more about the good of people and the community rather than their money and sense of antiquated "morals".

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Paula R

Wednesday, September 7th, 2011

I'm in my last semester of university right now (oh god! so scary! i'll never find a job!), and I can tell you that it's a GREAT place to meet people. I'm not much of a clubs/intermurals kinda person, so I usually meet people on campus in classes. It's a good way to find people who have a lot in common with you, because through discussions in class and stuff like that, you can really get to know someone's views. I met my lovely boyfriend in a Sexual Ethics seminar (awesome, right? It's actually a political science class). There were only 15 people in the class, so it was a good place to get to know your classmates. We realized we had a similar sense of humor through discussions and had talked a few times when we'd been early to class. If you take upper-level seminars, it's easy to talk and approach people, because you've been talking to them directly in class. Approach them after class, and ask them what they thought about this or that, or what they think of an assignment. It's a great icebreaker!

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Paula R

Wednesday, September 7th, 2011

Aww, Finch, it's so nice that you appreciate education. I'm glad there's something out there that you like. ;)

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Clarissa

Wednesday, September 7th, 2011

Ugh, college is for losers who can't make it in the real world without someone holding their hand. What can university teach me that I don't already know? What a waste of time and money.

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Intern Dan

Wednesday, September 7th, 2011

Geeze Paula, if you keep giving out tips like that for free you'll run us out of business. As for university, I actually partially agree with Clarissa. It's not "real life" training for the most part but I have to say my mind is a lot sharper now than when I started. Plus I learned a few nifty things along the way and had some fun. Not too shabby. @Finch... you know the university system is inherently flawed right?

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Tom

Wednesday, September 7th, 2011

I dropped out of college due to the workload, fighting, and my problems with money and the teachers. I would fight any classmate(male) if he was looking for it, the women were cool, way better than high school(aka the women who hurt me, I still need to make it fair), but they were so busy. the professors and teachers were assholes, one of them, Professor Kelin, got me so mad and embarrassed that I messed up and threw everything off his desk, then I told him to pick it up. that was the last I saw of that class and college. I was short on cash, I had a ton of work not finished, basically I was fucked with no way out, other than dropping out and joining the workforce, that's when I got a job at caldors, then went on to sales manager in target, and finally worked my way up best buy, until I became the head manager or the boss as I call myself, I run the show at the store, the guys above me come once a month, but if I play their politics, I'll be alright.

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John

Wednesday, September 7th, 2011

How do I become a better flirter with women. I can never think of any flirt or tease when I am in a conversation with women.

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Intern Dan

Wednesday, September 7th, 2011

Well John NP (NP = no picture because we have a John that posts regularly with a picture.) You are in the right place my friend! We can shgow you how to flirt well with women and do it in your style. Maybe you're not a teaser. How do your conversations usually go?

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Troy

Wednesday, September 7th, 2011

I've been reading your posts Tom and I find your story inspiring. You've had to deal with a lot of shit but you've done really well for yourself. You've made life fair for yourself! University isn't for everyone, especially people like us.

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Amy

Wednesday, September 7th, 2011

Paula- What do you think about group discussions that may actually provide fodder for further conversation? I always thought students disliked that, but maybe not! Good luck! College is awesome. It is different from "real life," but you'll figure it out :) Any tips for what to do when you're a female in a program that does not have a lot of guys (or you have tried approaching one and he ignored you for several months before speaking to you again)?

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Collin

Wednesday, September 7th, 2011

I can only assume that this works the same way at colleges not full of smelly, unkempt, engineers, but I've found that most attractive girls love having a conversation with a normal, clean-cut person. If I saw a girl I was attracted to, especially in a large lecture where you can get away with talking more, I would just go sit next to her. That in and of itself was a pretty bold move compared to what the other guys did, but then I would just talk to them. Usually, they turned out not to be someone I would click with, but that's the dangers of going to an engineering school when you have interests other than math and science. I would agree that at least the liberal arts university system is flawed though. Too many people waste their time going for years when they could quickly learn what they need to learn on the job in a training program. When I was a building construction major, I guarantee I could have learned everything I needed to know from a two year apprenticeship to a general contractor. At least I would have come out with directly marketable skills (well, if the economy hadn't crashed and killed off the need for general contractors). My friends in college for things like communications or sociology laugh about how little work they do and how little they learn, then follow it up with, "It's a college degree though." College programs need to be streamlined and stripped down to the bare essentials, and people need to realize that college isn't for everybody. Lots of people could excel in their careers with an apprenticeship or simple training program. @Clarissa, Can you calculate the tensile strength of a steel beam or the compression strength of a slab of concrete? Can you use CSS 3 and HTML 5? There's plenty of incredibly important things you learn in college that people don't just know off the top of their heads.

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Collin

Wednesday, September 7th, 2011

@Amy, Try taking business classes as electives. Problem solved.

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Paula R

Wednesday, September 7th, 2011

@Shogo: That's a surprisingly tricky question! I guess it would have to start with class discussions. Maybe after a heated debate, try to turn it into a post-class discussion. Something like "Man! I couldn't believe so and so said that!" or "Why do you like this so much?" Try to turn it into flirting at that point, maybe with a gentle teasing or something and try to make the lady laugh. Then you'll have a jumping off point next class, because you've already been chatting with the person. The second time you approach them you don't necessarily have to talk about class stuff. Maybe mention you've seen (or missed) a band recently and ask her what kind of music she likes. Something like that. Eventually, you guys'll be class-friends. I consider class-friends to be unique. These are people you're really friendly with in class, but not outside of it. Once you're class-friends, bring it outside of the classroom. You'll have plenty to talk about after class because you know you have stuff in common and can connect easily at this point. It makes for a pretty seamless date. Oh god, the on-campus date! I've been fortunate enough to not live on campus, but I think I can think of a few. My university runs something called Cinemania, which is a cheap movie Monday in one of the classrooms. They show airplane movies, like the kind that have left the theatre but aren't on DVD yet. I think a lot of campuses do this kinda thing, and it's a cheap fun date for broke students! There are also on-campus pubs at a lot of universities, so that's always a good option. A beer and a nice discussion? Awesome. Legal age is 18/19 in Canada so this is an easy option for us, but not so much for those of you south of the border. Also, always keep an eye out in the campus paper for cool events around campus. There are sometimes university theatre, dance and art shows on campus, free lectures about totally cool stuff and lots more! A word to the wise: Don't take her to a noisy frat party on the first date. While it's sometimes on campus and cheap, it's loud and not a good way to get to know someone. It can also cause social awkwardness for your lady if it's all your friends and she doesn't know ANYONE. Go for an on-campus picnic lunch, jump in the leaves if it's fall, make snowmen, or whatever, just make sure it's a good way to get to know her AND have fun! @Amy: Anything! Whether your prof was talking about microbiology, a book you guys had to read or Hitler, there's something there. Just nonchalantly bring it up in an inoffensive way such as "What did you think about "The Handmaids Tale"? I thought the dystopian element really added to the author's inherent feminist argument" or "Man, learning about cell structure is SO boring, right? I love bio, but when it's just ribosomes, ribosomes, ribosomes, I'm ready to burn my textbooks!" However, if you're in a group discussion rather than a lecture, it's a lot easier to discuss the other person's opinion. You can go up to them and say something like "I really like what you said about Plato's Symposium.. I think you're right about the relationship between Socrates and Alcibiades. Socrates' relationship with him really was a test of his character and backed up his main argument. As much as those crazy greeks loved it, I don't think pederasty should have a sexual element to it at all - super gross!" In saying something like that, it strokes their ego a little, but leaves it open for you to talk more. This kinda thing is good because it shows that you're friendly, intelligent and open to flirting! Sometimes they're a little unreceptive, but if they seem bored with the topic you can try to engage them about something else! Yeah, I agree with Collin. Take business electives. Lots of hot boys in that program!

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Clarissa

Wednesday, September 7th, 2011

@Collin: Suck it. ONly engineers have to know that, and they never get laid.

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Paula R

Wednesday, September 7th, 2011

@Clarissa: Why do you hate university so much? At very least, it helps people get good jobs and meet interesting people!

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John C

Wednesday, September 7th, 2011

David-did you major in communications? Just curious....

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Collin

Wednesday, September 7th, 2011

@Clarissa, Really? We're trying to have an actual discussion here. Either be polite and contribute intelligently without attacking people or go quietly sit in the corner until you decide to stop acting like a child.

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Paula R

Wednesday, September 7th, 2011

@Shogo: That's adorable! I'll have to keep that one in mind!

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David Wygant

Wednesday, September 7th, 2011

Hey Everyone Did anyone watch the video?? Not one person here commented on that, when Shogo and I did this video we laughed like crazy after. So wheres my laughs?

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Drew

Wednesday, September 7th, 2011

I saw it and it was funny. I love the way you made it look like you were in the room. Did you shoot that when you were in Europe. I spent 2 years in Germany and I have seen that poster in the underground. BTW. I love german women.

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Maryanne

Wednesday, September 7th, 2011

I watched it and if I was not committed to Shogo, I would be all over you after seeing that video. But Shogo is the man for me.

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Collin

Wednesday, September 7th, 2011

Honestly, I could hardly hear what you were saying, David.

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David Wygant

Wednesday, September 7th, 2011

Tom Did you ever get into a fight with a teacher?

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Intern Dan

Wednesday, September 7th, 2011

uh-oh Shogo, you've got me on one of my favourite topics. So the university system is flawed because it pretends that every subject worth studying is independent of every other subject. So people in economics see everything as economics, everyone in engineering sees everything as engineering. Life isn't that clear cut. There isn't one thing that can explain everything. University used to be about learning everything as one (hence uni) and now it's more a "multi-versity".

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Tom

Wednesday, September 7th, 2011

@David, no, there was no reason to anyways, the guy was an old man, and I just couldn't hurt him like that, the most I did was mess up his desk, and curse at him. that's how I made it fair, I only get physical with someone who can fight back, I like a challenge, I may get busted up, but like the joker I laugh inside of cry, always hide to pain so they could get mad, when a bully sees what he's doing is not working, he will feel like he lost.

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Intern Dan

Wednesday, September 7th, 2011

@Maryanne </3 Ouch.

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Harley Quinn

Wednesday, September 7th, 2011

@Tom, Why would anyone want to piss you off? You seem like you could beat up everyone in class. Would you beat someone up for me?

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David S.

Thursday, September 8th, 2011

You always make these seem so simple. /in a class of 300 to 400, talking to the professor like that would make you come off as an instant asshole so I think trying that wouldnt be smart but just talking to a girl and asking for her number to study is a smart idea and will most often work because everybody in college needs a study buddy :)

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D.J.

Thursday, September 8th, 2011

A real benefit of class/work- You don't need to get her digits right then and there, you'll see her again. It also makes it easier to gauge if she's someone you want to spend more time with. If she's not, there's always the next one!

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Collin

Thursday, September 8th, 2011

Don't forget the benefits of seeing girls from your classes at parties. "Jessica? What are you doing here?" *sex* I may have skipped a few steps in that process, but you get the general idea.

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Chris

Thursday, September 8th, 2011

@Tom.. What is up with harley quiinin. is this gonna be an ongoing joke. Check my comment to you at end of the "condom herpes blog". And.. I wondered If you a had a time machine to go back in time. Would you go back to the all the times where you were rejected by women and curse the shit outta them."Yea!!! This is revenge from 16 years in the future, just bringing fairness to the world" hahah. WHat would you do?

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Chris

Thursday, September 8th, 2011

I actually asked for the a girls number after the first day of talking outside class for 5 min.....Mistake learned...I am not going to that again.

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Harley Quinn

Thursday, September 8th, 2011

Nothing is up with me Chris, I'm just tired of people like you being mean to him. You don't know what it's like for us freaks and you should be more compassionate! Or else hahahaha

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Intern Dan

Thursday, September 8th, 2011

@Harley Quinn... ummm... @David S. It is that simple. Really, it is. However, simple things like dating and war are often the hardest. @Chris, if you don't mind the public exposure, can you give us a play-by-play of the conversation?

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David Wygant

Thursday, September 8th, 2011

@Chris To quit after one try tells me that you have no idea how life really works. Life is a formula. You do things over and over some will respond and some will not. If Drew Brees went out tonight and on the first play or the game through an Interception and went back to the bench and told his coach. Thats it for me I am done I am never throwing the ball again. That is your attitude and with that attitude life will never work!

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Intern Dan

Thursday, September 8th, 2011

Oh yeah, so the university thing. Majors aren't horrible because we all have subjects that we love more than others, it's the exclusivity of the different subjects that is the real problem. It's been a problem since the enlightenment began and I would argue that the type of thinking that has produced the modern university is actually THE crisis of modern times. My MA thesis is heavily focused on this, so it's kind of a pet topic of mine.

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john

Thursday, September 8th, 2011

@chris, what happened when you asked the girl for her number?

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Collin

Thursday, September 8th, 2011

@Chris, are you giving up on asking girls for their numbers or just making sure you have more of a connection next time?

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Tom

Thursday, September 8th, 2011

@Harley Quinn is a Troll. do not associate me with your shit. @Chris if she didn't give you her number, then too bad, not ever woman is going to like you, she didn't like you, plain and simple, if she was mean about it, then it would be unfair and you should be mad, but if not, then she did it in fairness, and if that's the case then get over it. Just brush it off, say to yourself, "Oh well, she's missing the fun of having me, other women would be elated to have me, she was a whore anyways", it will make you feel better, also keep approach, don't stop because of her. Also, what happened when you asked for her number? if she was polite, then it's fair, if she wasn't, then it is unfair.

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Tom

Thursday, September 8th, 2011

*every, not ever in the first sentence to chris.

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john

Thursday, September 8th, 2011

2 jokers, 1 blog, that's not fair.

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Paula R

Thursday, September 8th, 2011

@Tom: Hey buddy! good advice!

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Jeremiah

Thursday, September 8th, 2011

i say tom and harley quinn have a epic death match. cuz in the end "THERE CAN BE ONLY ONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

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Harley Quinn

Thursday, September 8th, 2011

I'm not a troll, I'm just a fan of your artistry. I think we need more fairness in the world. Everyone needs to learn that you should NEVER rub another man's rhubarb.

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Chris

Thursday, September 8th, 2011

I can't believe you guys misread my post.. AND I thought you guys were smart. Smarter than that. I'll give the play by play. I realized its a mistake to ask for a girls numer so quickly. AFter 5 min.. thats it.. that was it. I didn't say I was giving up. NO no... I can see how it can be misunderstood.

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Chris

Thursday, September 8th, 2011

At the end of class. I said "Wassup I remember You from 2 years ago" we talked and laughed for a quick little bit. ANd by the time it was separate ways (about less than 5min), I said " you seem like a cool person, I want to get to know you, hang out with you next week. Give me your number." She gave me a Funny Expression of disbelief and shock "No!" I smiled and laughed hard and said "Well how about facebook!!" haha.. She took my name...then I realized. "Why the hell did I ask for her number" we talked for only 5 min, and I didn't really like her that much anyway. She was beautiful but I thought she was kinda mean because some some stuff she said. I guess I just wanted to see what happens. Lesson learned- don't ask a girls number if you don't even want it or even if its less than 5 min.....But I am pretty sure If I spent an amazing 3 minutes with someone I would want them. She didn't add me on facebook. Like I care anyway. The next week I started a conversation with another girl right in front of class with "Wassup". I spent about 1 hr with her on the train. Now Thats a great amazing connection I had with her. She was an interesting girl. but I didn't ask for her number because she has a boyfriend and I'll see her next week! hmmm......see how things are different. Didn't I remember someone say "don't assume" because oyou make an ass out of you and me. haha.. you idiots. But I like you idiots.

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Chris

Thursday, September 8th, 2011

But your right david. I could be going out much more, and talking and facing my fears much more with women and other things. I know that. Thats true. But for me I feel i need to not give up on feeling happy. Some how its easy for me to feel down about myself and my life. Usually I feel really good, somedays I don't. I won't give on my happiness.

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Chris

Thursday, September 8th, 2011

On education and college, work? a question... I think its a huge waste of time too if you don't know what your going for. I've been in college for about 2yrs going on 3. And I learned a bunch a shit I am not going to use. I found out I like writing if thats one good that comes out. My capstone course is about reading books by one author and watching movies that relate and discussing this author and ideas. Thats the class, I know it doesn't really matter. Its not going to make me money; its like entertainment. What advice do you successful guys or girls have for me about jobs, careers, buisness, making money in somethin you love? Because out of all parts of my life my jobs is probably the lowest that I cared for. What advice?

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john

Thursday, September 8th, 2011

@chris,, I didn't misread,, I was just wondering what happened after the 5 min. Attempt.

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Howard

Saturday, September 10th, 2011

@Chris I think you're only making you're situation worse, by dwelling in it! I'm not gonna tell to just get over it, rejection sucks, and getting past it is easier once you stop dwelling on your mistakes! And besides getting a girls number isn't everthing I just enjoy the conversation! Life is way more fun when you just get to know people! And In the university thing, I personally love the college experience, its such different atmosphere!! It'd a great place to learn more on a subject or subjects that you want to pursue in later!!

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Chris

Sunday, September 11th, 2011

Thanks Howard.. your right when you say just enjoy the conversation. Strange thing which I have to stop is when I talk to a woman sometimes I think "okay when are we gonna go out on a date for the real tlak" Instead of just chatting her right there in the moment. I am thinkin about the future moment. (ridiculous) You helped me realize that just now. "I just enjoy the conversation!" I am learning.

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Jake

Monday, September 12th, 2011

So theres this girl in my class, I locked eyes with her right away, and let me tell you it was like staring into an oasis. i got instantly nervous my hands started sweting and i didn't know what to do or what to say... How do i approach this girl?

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how to meet people

Tuesday, September 13th, 2011

It is very important to meet people online and it is easy to communicate your ideas with every one.

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Dale

Wednesday, September 14th, 2011

Observation!! Whether its asking about homework, a prof, talking about a class someone took, in line for coffee... You can start a conversation with anyone throughout the day, which is easiest, and things can go from there!

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zanther

Thursday, September 15th, 2011

Wish I knew about Wygant during college. Man passed up so many opportunities due to cluelessness. And as far as college that was vital experience for me. Social for sure. Classes rounded me out. None of my classes were one tracked like that other guy said...maybe in technical colleges or junior colleges its more about the info...most 4 year schools tho its more about the process...

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Tsali

Saturday, September 24th, 2011

@Clarissa Obvious Troll is obvious. @Finch Hmm...my goodwill towards community and my morals, I think, were strengthened by school. College isn't for everyone, but in America we are being told we need college to make a living. I dropped out of college for a number of reasons, a big one being that I did feel I had my hand being held. Not everyone's in my situation. Besides self-discovery, there are soooo many other things to learn in college. Anyway, all the fraternity brothers throwing huge parties definitely aren't getting laid, right? Let alone the non-existent huge % of young Americans in college creating their own community. 'Cuz nobody's social if they choose to go to school, right?

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james

Sunday, November 13th, 2011

Thanks for the advice david everyday i read you and Shogo podcast i get more knowledge and i try to practice what i know to everyday Im changing i feel there a revolution in my head i feel so much confident thanks you and Shogo again.

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How To Meet People In A Class Or A Movie

About David

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62 Comments | Join the Discussion!

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Konstantin

Shogo (Coach)

Shogo (Coach)

Shogo (Coach)

Shogo (Coach)

Finch

Paula R

Paula R

Clarissa

Intern Dan

Tom

John

Intern Dan

Troy

Amy

Collin

Collin

Paula R

Clarissa

Paula R

John C

Collin

Paula R

David Wygant

Drew

Maryanne

Collin

David Wygant

Intern Dan

Tom

Intern Dan

Harley Quinn

David S.

D.J.

Collin

Chris

Chris

Harley Quinn

Intern Dan

David Wygant

Intern Dan

john

Collin

Tom

Tom

john

Paula R

Jeremiah

Harley Quinn

Chris

Chris

Chris

Chris

john

Howard

Chris

Jake

how to meet people

Dale

zanther

Tsali

james