Men are extremely visual. Women need to realize that men are extremely visual.
Being visual does not refer to what men find attractive, but rather how they become attracted to women. It means that you need to use your sexuality and your femininity to attract men.
A man will look at a woman many times — five, six, seven, ten, twelve times — and will not stop looking until a woman acknowledges him. A woman who knows and understands this, can easily get a man to approach by acknowledging him. It’s really very simple.
Say you see a man to whom you are attracted. You need to look directly at him and smile. If he notices you, then go back and smile at him again.
When you do this, the man will become very curious and wonder why you’re smiling at him over and over again. You need to encourage him to come over to you.
Understand that men are basically Scooby Doos on steroids. You’re the Scooby Snack, and you need to lay the crumbs down for men.
The crumbs are your smiles. The crumbs are a casual hello. Once a man spots a woman to whom he is attracted, you are able to go and lead him with your femininity and your smile to come over to you.
In order to really learn and understand this at a deeper level, though, you need to be observant about all your surroundings. You have to be able to look around at all your surroundings and know that men are looking at you all the time.
Most women are not observant. Most women walk into a place with their head in the clouds — on their BlackBerry or thinking about what’s on their “to do” list — and never notice men noticing them.
So one of the best things to do to learn how to be more observant is to go out in the field with a friend for a day. Have your friend be your “wing girl” for the day, with her job all day long being just to observe you and to notice all the men who are checking you out.
By doing that, and by having her point all these men out to you, you will see all the opportunities you are missing to meet men every single day. Most women have opportunities to meet men that present themselves all day long, but unfortunately they are almost never looking!
Women have been taught not to look. Men, on the other hand, are looking at women nonstop.
Men never stop looking for women. Men are always looking for women, talking about women and obsessing about women. That is how men are visual. So in order for you to become better at this, you need to learn to be more aware of your surroundings.
When I talk about using your femininity and your sexuality, I am not talking about being “slutty” or overtly coming on to men all day long. I am talking about sexuality and femininity that exudes from within.
For example, women who have a lot of masculine energy need to dress more sexy. Many women end up having very masculine energy about them due their careers. You need to feel sexy as a woman. You need to put yourself out there more. You need to really explore your feminine side.
Take a look at your body type. Take a look at the type of woman you are. Start looking through magazines that have women with similar body types to you in them. See how those women dress sexy. Go to a store and get a makeover. Find a way to express your sexuality and to feel sexy from within yourself.
Men are attracted to all body types and to all types of women. The key thing here, though, is that men are attracted to sexy women of all body types.
So women really need to explore that side of themselves more. Women need to learn to use their feminine energy and start flirting. The Scooby Doos out there will respond when you do.
I always feel like if I smile at a man before I know that he’s interested in me, that he will think I’m coming onto him…Isn’t this true??
Callie,
I think that is the point of this blog. If he’s looking at you that means he IS interested! and he wont know you’re interested unless you let him see those pearly whites!
Thanks Joe … except I wonder… Does a man only look at a woman if he’s interested? Maybe he is checking out the nice looking produce on the wall behind you??
callie,
no when we look it means we are insterested.
Callie – if I’m interested in a woman I look at her MANY times and she might look up at me at the same time and make eye contact ONCE if at all. If she was checking me out then as far as she knows I either glanced at her once or didn’t notice her at all. So if you’re not sure if a guy’s looking at you or the produce behind you then move and stand in front of some uglier produce and see if he’s looking your way again.
I have no problem attracting men/guys. Most of the time I don’t even have to do anything or put my mind on it.
The problem for me is connecting on an emotional level with a guy, or even with people in general. Advice?
Geez David, what happened to your website??
Whoever designed this version of it, it’s gotten worse, not better. Your homepage doesn’t even work well with the Mac. And what happened to not being so try hard??
It’s amazing that this industry has so many dating coaches that know how to generate attraction without trying to so hard, but they seem to drop the ball entirely when it comes to web development. Guess what? It’s the SAME THING! Yes, sell the sizzle, not the steak, but whatever you do, make it look good, and make it easy to get around.
You’re killing traffic with with all the busy hard to selling.
Deline
Kismet,
If you feel you can’t connect emotionally… let me ask you this: are you opening yourself up to connecting?
You usually get what you project… so how open are you to telling someone who you are?
I find it funny that you have compared men to scooby doo’s on your blog for years (well, I’ve just read since 2007, but anyway…) and this turns out to be the most explicit comparison, scooby doo picture included.
So women, I think we should have gotten the hint by now.
Nice post!
This ‘men are visual’ biz is a myth unhelpful to either gender. Humans are visual,or schlubby men’s inboxes would overflow–they don’t. Women are visual, but also have a range beyond it. A man can be satisfied with something as temporary as beauty, then move on. The reality is women who have economic parity, are more likely to expect youth and beauty too, as men have for eons.
Marie – I think you read the line “men are visual” and then just stopped reading.
If you read the whole blog, then you would have seen that David was not speaking about men being attracted to women they find visually appealing (because EVERYONE of course is attracted to the people they find visually appealing)
What David was saying is that men respond to visual clues from women. Women who try to be “subtle” by NOT looking or smiling at men, will not attract men. Men are “visual” in terms of the fact that they need to visually see that you are interested in them.
Maybe go back, Marie, and read the whole blog