I woke up this morning to a great email from a past bootcamp client. As part of my Monday routine I have to clear out a ton of emails from the weekend and then once I do that, I can actually read what is important.
I read this message and right away I knew it was today’s post.
As you all know I rarely will have a guest blogger but this message was too good to pass up.
Thanks Anthony!!
Here is the actual email he sent and his amazing blog.
Hi David, it’s Anthony. Hope all is well and wonderful with you! Everthing has been great w/ me. I wanted to share an article I just finished writing right now. I’ve made this BIG TRANSFORMATION this past month, and I feel like I’ve totally get what you’ve been teaching. I’ve been reading a lot of great books and have learned from these great teachers like yourself. This article is sort of a cumulation of all this great advice I’ve learned from everyone as told through my own mind. Hope you like this article, if you think it’s good feel free to use it on a blog if you think its worthy. Just had to share this w/ the world.
Anthony
What if I told you that there are two words in the English Language that can transform your life, for the better. Two simple words when put together, will help you unlock the real being that is you. Yes the true you. The you that’s shed off all your insecurities. The you that’s not listening to your own egoistic monkey chatter. The you that you’ve always wanted to show off to the world but were afraid to. The true you that wants to experience success and happiness with the opposite sex, with money, and with life. The one complete you!
These two words when you hear them, feel them, and totally embrace them will bring a change in your life so amazing, it almost feels magical.
Are you ready to hear what these two magic words are? You ready? The two words are……
Be yourself.
Two simple words with tremendous depth. Two words that are the tip of the iceberg with a very deep meaning that’s as deep as the ocean the iceberg floats on.
Being yourself, means being aware of yourself. Guys do you want to know why it seems like 10 % of the men out there, attract 90% of the women. These 10 percenters as I like to call them, are simply being themselves. This is why all you nice guys out who are always chasing and not attracting will always have this asexual, undesirable as a potential boyfriend image in front of women. You’re not truly being, embracing and having awareness of your true inner self. This is why it seems like women go for all the “bad boys” and jerks. These bad boys and jerk guys are being themselves. Not being yourself is also why a lot of you guys and gals too, are being designated to the eternal, and very dreaded, friend zone.
When you are 100% in the moment, present, and aware, you are free of all the bullshit that’s weighing you down everyday. And do you want to know why this happens? It’s simple. In the field of psychology it is well known that the human mind, no matter how brilliant, can only hold one thought at a given single moment. Let me show you what I mean here. For example, you cannot SIMULTANEOUSLY think of your very first kiss and what you’re going to have for breakfast tomorrow. The same is true with emotions! The human brain cannot simultaneously feel 2 different types of emotions. One cannot feel positive and joyful while feeling resentment and anger. These thoughts and feelings can occur linearly but not simultaneously. One can occur after the other, but both at the same time, never.
So the next time when you have thoughts of “do I look fat today”, “is he or she too hot for me”, or “is my significant other cheating on me at work?”, just stop and look around. Be aware of what you’re doing, and where you are. If for example your having these negative thoughts while sipping coffee at starbucks, just embrace the moment. Think of how good that Chai Tea Latte is you’re having. Be aware of how good the flavors reveal themselves on your tongue. Be aware of how the warmth of the drink flows down your throat and chest. Be aware of how hot the cup is in your hand. Trust me people this will work. When you are yourself, being genuine, and being engrossed in all things and everything around you, it’s virtually impossible for you mind to imprison you in monkey chatter hell. In life, the situation isn’t the cause of what you’re feeling, but rather it’s your thoughts about it. So being yourself, and present in the MOMENT OF NOW won’t allow your mind to stress, be depressed, and fret over whatever’s holding you back.
Being aware of the present moment will bring you happiness and bliss you probably haven’t experienced much, if at all. And when this transformation occurs, guys you will be so much more successful with women. Remember, women complain a lot that men don’t listen and don’t pay attention to them. Being present in the moment will cure this complaint that women legitimately have against us. So the next time you’re chatting with a women, any woman, whether it be one you’re attracted to or not, just be yourself. Be aware of your environment that’s around you two. Be engrossed in every word she says. Be observant to every little thing that’s there. Doing this little thing of being yourself will convey confidence, happiness, and generate interest. The same here can be applied to the gals too, when you’re talking with potential men.
And the great thing about being yourself, and being present is that it helps not just with your love and dating life, it helps with your ENTIRE LIFE! For everyone, heaven and hell exists in the mind. Choosing heaven means you’ve chosen to be present, when you’re not present, you’re living in your own personal hell.
Folks, there’s only one moment in life. One moment that really matters. One moment when you can start changing and re sculpting your life the way you want it. One moment that only comes once in a life time, and that moment is NOW!
Thanks, Anthony!
This is a great blog to start your week with… or the rest of your life, for that matter.
I got fired from my job last Monday -another downsizing casualty-, but I don’t really mind -that job was sucking the life out of me!
I am going to follow this great piece of advice and be myself: I will finish my demo on this week!
Nice. People always tell you to be yourself, but what if you’re a needy, insecure, and negative person? If that’s the case, you should not ‘be yourself’.
Saying ‘be yourself’ is misleading in that it makes it appears simple, when there are people who struggle with years and years of negative ‘programming’, if you will.
You should strive to be the most POWERFUL, CONFIDENT, and ATTRACTIVE version of yourself.
It’s great that a bootcamp, books you’ve read, and a lot of personal work are paying off for you, Anthony.
Being present, in the moment, and aware of yourself takes practice and patience. I’m glad it’s paid off for Anthony, and serves as a great example for others.
Much love,
Sonny
Damn this one touched my soul. Im printing this out.
best blog youve that ive ever read of yours. completely honestly. realised on my field trip i wasnt being present, so when i go back tomorrow, im going to have a nice field report for the blog!!
I totally agree with you David!
Being in the moment not only help you accomplish anything in life more effectively but it also help with your personal well being…
This concept is so important that it too gets mentioned in most literature from the earlier times:
In the Bible, Jesus says to not worry about tommorrow as tommorrow’s worry will come; just focus on the now; do the task at hand and do them well…
Even Confucious says “When you are doing the dishes, be with the dishes”…
All this is to set you free from being overwhelmed with tommorrow’s worry which might not even happen or past events which you may have regreted which you should have left it where it belong – right behind you…
When one is in the moment; one is able to focus better, have better clearity and not being overwhelmed by the task at hand…this means that you are able to breath alot better and being relaxed…when one is calmer and relaxed it enables an individual to be more creative and appropriately spontaneous in any situation…
when you are uptight; the person whom you are speaking with can feel your tension…they will somehow feel uneasy as well…yes, this also means even if you are talking about the calming breeze by the beach or the tranquil sound of birds chirping in the park, people can still sense tension when you speak when your mind are cluttered with past/future worries/to-do-lists…
Free your mind; be in the moment – and this is when magic starts to happen right before your very eyes…
This is when “its not what you say its how you say it” truly applies and works in your favour…
On the subject on being yourself…I absolutely agree with Sonny here!
Strive to constantly being your BEST SELF…
As we all know that there are those who are extremely shy, introvert or even anti-social…but are these traits of yourself really serving you in the best way you truly desire in your life?
If not then the only logical way is to change that…even if you end up being the direct opposite you will not be another guy/gal…you are still you but now you have become the BETTER you striving constantly to be the BEST you…
Anthony, great post. Glad to see you are achieving your goals. I still think about eating breakfast in front of the Sphinx from when you posted a comment about the Four Agreements story, funny thing is that is actually going to happen now. Peter, read it, liked it, and now I’m on to Eckhart Tolle. Anyone heard of him?
As a professional writer, I’m just cursious about why you wrote that piece (besides the obvious that you found an answer to a question your soul was asking). Is it for a class? Or print? Or just to mark you achievment? Just curious is all.
I enjoyed that post. It speaks volumes of how you should LIVE life and not just go through the motions.
Really good post!
I agree with the above comments. This quite possibly the best blog I’ve ever read! (and I’ve read A LOT)
Diego
Glad that you liked this. You know life is all about moving forward and you will find a great new job.
Taras
You have read every blog and your fav is one that i did not write. Very cool:)
Benjamin
ITs all about what I teach and Anthony has been a master student when it comes down to really putting this into his life.
I am glad you feel inspired!
A Movie
He wrote it just because he felt it and it came from his heart:)
As you know that is always the best way to write.
I loved your ideas that you sent me in that last email.
Been really busy and did not respond but we are on the same page.
Fleance
Great post by you as well. I really am happy when i see people inspired by what i post.
Sonny
You should strive to be the most POWERFUL, CONFIDENT, and ATTRACTIVE version of yourself.
That is what everyone needs to learn!!
Waveman
I know Anthony is going to be jazzed that you printed this out!
Pete C
Your favorite as well.
That is very very cool
Great article.
It isnt anthony parkes by any chance is it? He writes a good, if infrequent, blog
Adam
No a different Anthony
David,
Np about responding. I understand. I’m still “at work” if you know what I mean, but my passion project is the in my mind at all times now (usually that means I’m going to be working on it soon, really soon). Just got to get the meal ticket taken care of first.
David
Actually didnt realise it wasnt you who wrote this blog! On further examination, yeah the writing styles a little notably different, although it doesnt detracgt from it being an amazing post.
It hit me hardest today, after a mediocre field trip where i didnt really take any risks, and backed out of a few things like finding fossils with women on the beach, why is why it hit me so hard.
Its what youve been saying all along, and I think it took me another person to actually believe that it really is true: if you stay present, there really is no fear! By being thankful for what you have and living life to the fullest rather than dwelling on the past, you cant possibly lose.
Pete
Yes it was a great post.
I think Anthony will be back here later talkig about it even more.
I agree with what Sonny said. All too often in my life there were different aspects or facets of me. Very comfortable, relaxed & happy when hanging around the house or out with friends somewhere. I was being myself then. But feeling like a fish out of water whenever I was in a crowd of people i didn’t know or trying to approach a beautiful woman. Major anxiety attacks there sometimes. Unfortunately, that was also me being myself, another, albeit more dysfunctional facet of the same person.
So as WoF basically said later in his post, it’s not easy reinventing yourself, but becoming that POWERFUL, CONFIDENT & ATTRACTIVE MAN is something I must strive to do and BECOME.
While reading Anthony’s blog, I also remembered and thought about a song by Van Halen called “Right Now!” It’s about not only being present in the moment I believe, but also seizing those opportunities presented to you. Not letting them get away, but seizing that moment and doing your best and making it happen, whatever it is you want to do.
HI EVERYONE THIS IS ANTHONY, THE AUTHOR OF THIS BLOG : D Thank you everyone for your honest feedback. I’m so touched by everyone’s comments here today. Everyone’s input really made my day today. This day on April 6th, 2009 was made special by all this creative energy by everyone. If anyone’s curious, David got the ball rolling with my transformation. And later on after year and a half from David’s bootcamp and discovering the work of eckhart tolle and dale carnegie, I feel like the caterpillar that’s finally evolved into the butterfly! Hope everyone is having a great moment right now! If not please do! Especially if your single, all the other great people in this world needs it, this very moment! Great nite everyone
Anthony
Will of Fire,
I’ll disagree with you on the fact that because you are insecure or needy, you shouldn’t be yourself.
I may be arguing on semantics here… but I think you should learn to get back in touch with yourself i you are being needy and insecure.
When you are being needy, insecure or negative, you aren’t being yourself. What you want to learn is to uncover the core self that makes you yourself.
The needy, insecure, negative self that you are talking about is just a layer on top of your core self.
So instead of learning to be your MOST attractive self as you call it. Learn to be more of your CORE self.
Because the CORE self is always attractive. It’s the purest form of you! and that’s beautiful
Justadjustit/anthony
Great inspirational writing, today you were the butterfly who flapped his wings and influenced change some where far.
if you ever are looking før other inspirational people try Sheri Rosenthal she really has a lot of great tools, and as David, people who really care to help people, she offers a lot of free stuff.
David
Thanks again, i have said it before you really are more of a lifecoach or spiritual coach who speak in layman terms. (-:
Kheim,
Yeah, the more I think about it, the more I see the truth in what you’re saying about the Core self and the outer layers that need to be stripped away.
And here’s the song, that’s been playing in my mind the past several minutes: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=94Z-XblP3BE&feature=related&fmt=18
I’ve spent the last 10 minutes or more, at least 6:21 getting back to my real self by playing air guitar and following Eddie’s lead. And having a blast, and feeling like that kid again.
Right Now – Wolfgang has replaced Michael on bass, and they’re probably jamming somewhere.
Right Now – Eddie might be playing with his new ax affectionately named “The Wolfgang” after his son.
Right Now – I’m thinking about going out and getting more help on my fashion makeover as David suggested in one of his MP3s.
Right Now – MBE might be thinking about me and how I smiled at her the last time we were talking.
Right Now -
Great blog David and I agree with you…Being yourself cost nothing.
We all go through this life once and we should live it to the fullest I have less than 51 years left on this planet and I intend on being myself and happy with whom I am…I have faith that I will be with someone but when I don’t know…If we could look into the future then what are we trying to see…
Good point, Khiem. Your CORE self is a great way to describe it. Like the saying goes, “You are not your actions.”
You should be able to get in touch with the cause of the neediness and insecurity. If you accept those parts of yourself and can be relatively okay with them, you can take control of them, as opposed to letting them dictate your actions around women and people in general.
So, yes, get in touch with them, accept them, and then do what it takes to eliminate what causes them.
When you are being true to your core self, power, confidence, and attractiveness are by-products, and that’s what we ought to strive for.
Oh yea. Go Spartans! I’m a sucker for the underdog.
Diego – Sorry to hear about your job. You’ll be so much better off in the long run. The comfort of a paycheck leads us to not chase our true passions so often. I know when I got laid off during the dot com bust I looked at it as an opportunity to really make a move into a career that I had a true passion for. I now love what I do for a living so much that at times I have to remind myself that I’m getting paid to do it. I wish you the best, it really will all work out for the best in the long run.
Thanks Marina, I will check out Sheri rosenthal. THANKS AGAIN DAVID FOR EVERYTHING AND ANYTHING YOU’VE DONE FOR ME, ESPECIALLY TODAY WITH POSTING MY ARTICLE! Most humbily appreciate it. Also everyone, to add a little something. This power of the now moment, of being yourself, not only applies to love and dating it applies to other area’s too. Career, money, interpersonal, and intrapersonal relationships! Hope everyone got something from this article today.
Anthony–great post! So real and from the heart! I think in this day and age when we have access to so many things that we mult-task with like blackberries, computers, tvs…our society has become so ADD! It’s even more important to stop and be in the moment and pay attention to the things that are important to us. It’s difficult to achieve any goals when you are not focused.
best blog ive read to this day.so true in so many different ways.life becomes much better by living in the moment of now;instead of past or present.
-randal
*future
Thanks David for posting this article and thanks Anthony for writing it! Just the kind of motivation I needed to hear right now. Fresh out of college and trying find a job. Man it’s competitive out there! This article really helped to calm some of my fears and doubts
Justadjustit / Anthony – Thanks for the timeliest of reminders. Clearly, you have lived up to your on-line moniker and adjusted your view of the world, internalized it, and now you are taking it on by being open and sharing what you have observed and learned.
“Being yourself” is such an old truth in a so-called modern age. It’s a very eastern, Buddhist concept of “mindfulness.” Truth is always a very simple matter at its core and only our own insecurities complicate things – often beyond recognition and necessity.
A few years ago, an article was published about a study on multi-tasking. Claims of greater efficiency by practitioners were proven to be false. People actually were much more efficient when they weren’t juggling many items but concentrating on fewer things or one thing at a time. The more items that they tried to do at a time, the less efficient they were. Sounds to me like the business case for mindfulness … stay in the moment and don’t let the monkey chatter blur your focus and drain your attention. Otherwise, your success will be similarly diluted.
Enjoyed reading your post Anthony, and great to hear about your realization!
K – totally agree, i believe in doing less with more, by focusing on the one activity at a time, and being in the moment, you get more done.
Darren
Competition is what life is all about!!!
Its good for you and it will make you stronger in the long run.
Randy
That makes about 6 people who thought this was the best blog ever,
Do you know why?
Its because Anthony is one of you guys.
On the road and learning powerful transformations evreyday!!
You have seen someones journey and now you know that this works!!!
How are you in your journey?
You know, I have to say, this is a fantastic article. I was just coming upon this revelation this morning, ironically before I read this post. Just one of those little signs in life that says you’re on the right track. Anyways, all this bullshit that the other guys in the industry teach that says “don’t be yourself, because yourself is what go you in this situation to begin with.” This couldn’t be farther off. How many people act differently around their friends and family compared with women? I don’t know anyone who is genuine in both situations. If more men or women would act like they do around their close friends and family, they would be TREMENDOUSLY more successful. It’s when you put up a false persona to “try” to attract women, or men for that matter, that doesn’t work.
Again, great post!
RG
Sonny,
nice to hear from you.
you mentioned being needy…why are you needy…are you seeking someones approval. Make the decesion right now not to seek anyones approval and you will have a massive shift immediately. Being yourself means making the decesion first…make that decesion now! Many people often have sudden shifts when enough is enough and you want to change bad enough…people get sick and tired of feeling sick and tired and then…bam…a shift happens..and the road seems clear. How sick and tired are you? I want to know?…
Darren,
maybe filter the world by thinking that there isnt any competition out there…beleive your the best and that you can bring unique qualities that others dont have…
I love being in the present and being myself!!
Thanks, Adam. That’s some powerful advice.
I’m happy to say I’m makin’ daily progress, but man, it’s hard sometimes!
Wanna know how sick and tired I am? Lemme tell you.
In David’s Mastery series, he calls her ‘carrot girl’. I’ll just call her ‘the one that got away’.
Last week, a smokin’ hot woman comes in for dinner the restaurant that I work in. I’m talkin’ gorgeous face, bangin’ body, the whole nine. She’s with a friend (who ain’t bad, either). She’s makin’ eyes at me the ENTIRE night. She’s smilin’ at me and lighting up the entire room at the same time. They look like the friendliest, nicest, sweetest people. What did I do? I nutted up. I did nothing! Couldn’t think of a single thing to say. Fuckin’ monkey chatter commandeers my brain.
Before they leave, she hits me with this lingering gaze that I will never, ever, EVER forget. I go to pick up their checks after they’re gone, and there’s a note on her check for me! I won’t say what it said, but I will say this: ARGHHHHHHHHH!!!! lol.
I chalked this one up in the ‘loss’ column. After bitch-slapping myself, having a good laugh at it, I gained valuable knowledge and experience from this event. Betcha I do better next time.
That’s how sick and tired I am! Way to go, Adam. Got me all worked, haha. But thanks again for the advice.
Peace,
Sonny
>>>>>>go to pick up their checks after they’re gone, and there’s a note on her check for me! I won’t say what it said…
Oh come on, don’t do that, I hate it when people do that….TELL US what the note said!!!!
I agree with Dan.
Haha, my bad, fellas. I wasn’t tryin’ to leave yall hangin’.
I really wanted to share that story with everyone. That part is just somethin’ I’d rather keep for myself.
The note was simple enough, nothing special. Make what you will of the hearts and smiley face, though
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