There’s a major buzz in the movie world right now. They’ve cast the 50 Shades of Grey movie, and before you know it, women around the world will be flocking to the theatre for a couple of hours of pure fantasy.

Housewives will leave their husbands on the sofa as they charge out the front door to see Christian Grey. This enigma of a man who makes women’s knees tremble at the mention of his name. So, what is it about this Mr. Grey that makes women feel so sexy, and what can he teach men about what women really want?

Grey isn’t the nicest guy in the world, and you certainly can’t describe the character as passive. He’s upfront, in your face, and not afraid to show a woman what he wants. For me, that is one of the things women love about him.

We live in the most passive society in the entire world.

Men are terrified to grab a woman and kiss her. They’re scared to throw her down on the bed and dominate her physically as a man should. Men have become afraid to ravish a woman sexually. However, something else has caused men to become passive, sexually selfish, and almost desensitized to sex…. PORN!

Pornography is there to get men off fast. From a young age, guys train themselves to slap on some porn, and stroke themselves to orgasm as quick as they can.

For many guys, sex has become about getting to the goal rather than enjoying the journey. Sex is a journey. It’s a story that should unfold between two lovers, and like any good story should have peaks, suspense, excitement, and eventually a dramatic climax.

Sex for women, like 50 Shades of Grey, starts in their mind.  It creates this passion.  It creates that excitement. It creates a rise in the sexual energy inside them.

Women love to be seduced. They want a man to claim them. They want to be with a real man.  That’s what Christian Grey represents for women.  He’s a real man.  He’s a decisive man.  A man who pursues them.  A man who wants to satisfy them sexually.  He’s a man that knows what he’s doing.

The 50 Shades series has sold millions of copies, and the movie will be a smash hit because the author E.L. James has tapped into the sexually starved society women live in nowadays. Women spend their nights with vibrators getting themselves off, because men don’t bother taking women on the journey of sex. Men ignore the whole seduction element of the sexual experience.

Women want to be seduced emotionally and mentally, before they’ll let you have them physically. Porn has trained guys to see sex as some kind of sprint event. Women can’t go from zero to 60 in a couple of seconds. You need to warm them up with words and actions. Women want to FEEL a man.

That’s why 50 Shades of Grey is so powerful for women’s subconscious thought process. It seduces them. Every woman reading it imagines Christian Grey is seducing her personally. Yes, the author paints Grey as a good looking, sexy man, but it’s more about the words. It’s the way she describes the seduction process that drives women crazy.

Women have complained to me for months, for years, about how passive men are. You need to become strong and decisive guys. You need a game plan. You need to make women feel desired and protected. When you’re going out with a woman, tell her what you’re going to do.
 
“I’ll meet you at 6pm. We’re going for a quick dinner, and then I’m taking you for a walk along the beach. Wear something warm. We’re going to be there late.”

Let women know you’re not afraid to be a man. You need to unlock your own Christian Grey. That doesn’t mean be an arrogant jerk. It just means owning your words and your actions. It means understanding that sex and seduction is a journey that starts in a woman’s mind.

Take them on that journey and they’ll keep coming back for more. And don’t be scared to ask women what they want. Use the upcoming Grey movie to start conversations with women. Ask them what they think of the book and the movie. Does it turn them on? What do they like about the character?

Take the time to understand what women really want in a man. Instead of getting online and jumping straight onto your favorite porn site, pick up the 50 Shades book and read it. Look at women’s forums. Try to understand women properly.

I say it all the time in my coaching programs. Read a romance novel and learn about seduction from the female standpoint. And lay off the porn! Do you really want another book like 50 Shades of Grey to dominate society?

Do you really want your woman to desire a fictional character in a book more than she wants you?

It’s time to wake up men. Women are starving emotionally and sexually. You can satisfy them, so instead of being jealous of Mr.Grey, grab a coffee, take a seat, and learn from him.