Get Out Of The Friend Zone
February 1, 2010 
63 Comments
One topic that people seem to ask me to talk about over and over again is the issue of “the friend zone.” People always want to know how to avoid getting into the friend zone (especially when they are out on a date).
Just asking the question means that you need to take a good look at your mindset. Think about the question: “How do I avoid the friend zone when I am out on a date?” Take a moment and think about this…
Go ahead, I’ll wait.
You’re out on a date with a woman. She is not looking at you as a friend if she accepted the date from you in the first place.
The fact that you have this concern, however, shows that you are going into your dates with the energy of being a friend. This means that you are playing it safe.
It means that you are really not expressing your desires, feelings and emotions. You are basically in your head during the entire date, just being a “good guy” and probably agreeing with everything she says.
By playing it safe, though, you get exactly what you fear the most. You get put in the friend zone.
Guys ask me all the time how they can “escalate” with a woman. I can’t stand pickup terminology like that. Escalate? Are you an escalator? Are you going up an escalator? Are you a plane taking off from LAX escalating into the sky? But I digress . . .
Regardless of the terminology, when you’re out on a date it’s all about your mindset and how you interact with the woman. It’s all about your eye contact, your smile, and touching her hand across the table as she’s telling a story.
It’s about letting yourself go and just being yourself so she’s able to become attracted to you. It’s so hard for people to just let go.
If you do nothing on a date except think and think and think, then guess what? You will never create any type of sexual attraction, because women will see that you are in your own head. When you’re totally in your own head, you can’t get into her heart.
So, how do you do this? How do you stay out of your own head, tap into your emotions and just let go?
You must stay present. You listen to her stories. You smile. You hold her hand if you feel like holding her hand.
There is no right or wrong time to hold somebody’s hand. You do it when you feel it.
Here is a great exercise to do to learn how to tap into your emotions. Get a friend and tell them how you feel about them. Describe what it feels like to be friends with them, and what it’s like from your perspective.
Then imagine what it feels like to be friends with yourself… Describe what it feels like to really reach deep inside yourself and see who YOU really are. Doing this enables you to see what your prospective date sees, from a fresh perspective. Look, she’s going on this date for the same reasons you are – to find out more about you, to enjoy herself, and maybe establish a connection. If you take the time to think about what qualities you display to your friends that make you a good friend, you’ll be more aware of them and she’ll instantly pick up on them. This will allow you to get out of your head!
When I was single and went on dates, I was never in my own head. I used to just relax, enjoy myself and never thought about whether the woman was turned on by me. I only wondered whether I was turned on by her. If I felt like kissing her at the end of the date, I did so because we had connected as people.
You all know what it’s like to connect with people. You connect with friends, family, and co-workers.
It is no different to connect with someone of the opposite sex. It takes being present. It takes enjoying yourself in the moment. It takes letting go.
If you do all of those things, you won’t be in the friend zone. You’ll be in the lover zone.
Lately I was on a date with this woman, I was so into my head. I could not be present. I was thinking, what whould be my next move, what should I do to kiss her, to escalate!
She was on the miss of the czech republic competetion years ago so I was kind of nervous and not being truly there. A BIG lesson for me though.
Its just funny that being present solves everything. Great blog David
Man this is so true. Lately I’ve been in my head so much. I know its wrong but I do it anyways.
Lately I’ve been frustrated by not getting a date but I think its because I havent been completely open and havent talked to at least 5 people every day. The girl I like in school doesn’t respond back. The girls I call never return the calls or texts. It sucks. But maybe I’m just having a bad day.
Thanks for this one too, David. I had been wondering what was the proper mindset on these situations. Now, I’m aware that women can feel where you’re coming from the whole time (must be that famous sixth sense of theirs lol).
I live a lot in my head, and I have to admit that I had wanted to be more affectionate to girls, but restrained myself. Only after reading these blogs for a while, I have realized that women respond to affection.
How would you even know if you are in the friend zone??? I mean I have friends that are girls but I don’t know if they are even in the friend zone. I mean I have their numbers and all but I flirt with them but in a kind of friendly way.
Another thing is how do you know if the girl is flirting with you or if she’s just like that? The type of girl that is really outgoing and talks to everyone and likes to laugh. She is a cool girl but how do you know if she’s flirting back??
Mario-
great to see you on here.
looking forward to have you more often.
I love this paragraph its so fuckin hysterical…..
“Guys ask me all the time how they can “escalate” with a woman. I can’t stand pickup terminology like that. Escalate? Are you an escalator? Are you going up an escalator? Are you a plane taking off from LAX heading off escalating into the sky? But I digress . . .”
Mario- Please except my sincere welcome to the party on this crazy world of DW and the crew.
Where are you from bro?
I aiming this year to be in the lover zone more often:)
Clint-
Its very funny paragraph totally agree.
Clint-
yes you can aim but more importantly aim to be relax around her, be present and create deep connection, and the rest of the puzzle will fall in its right place.
Yes i like how you said it Jacob. Maybe i should’t aim at the out come but aim at the process, thats deep.
Mario-
Forgot to mention this…..
yes its a numbers game.
at the same time let go of all outcome, but focus at the process of mastery of your life.
some women will be attracted to you and some just will not.
ask yourself? are you attracted to the person that you have become? do you honestly love yourself fully?
b/c in the end if you don’t love yourself fully, no women can ever give you that love.
Slavaaaaaaaaaaaaa:
You will have to share her pic.
but ya its so easily to get caught up with the monkey chatter in our head all b/c of peoples credentials and looks.
this monkey chatter is not something we are born with, its something that is taught and its going around the circle, its a awful disease.
Clint-
Actually I’m a part of the members group but I havent posted here that much. Im 16 and I live in Laredo, Texas.
Jacob. I have to change my mindset to the one that I’m the gift. I still havent been able.
Diego R+R
Their 6th sense is scary sometimes when you are not really speaking from your heart, they tell you it right in your face:)
Have you ever truly expressed to a woman how you felt about her?
Mario: wow you are only 16 man! i wish i knew about this when i was 16, you are so ahead of the curve man, lets say so ahead of most 16 years old i know.
I wish my nephew was like you, some reason he doesn’t talk about girls, i think his parents have turned him into a super ultra video game nerd:)
maybe i will have him come to this blog sometimes.
i’m thinking about joining the members group? how do you like it?
Yea man do it. It will help you so much. I can say I have improved from last year thanks to all the coaches, the calls, the blog. Its so worth it man. Although I still havent gotten a date though its okay. I quite don’t know why I haven’t gotten a date yet. It’s weird.
But yea the I’m doing things that I would of never done by myself.
I have told girls how they really are and I understand how girls work. It quite funny.
But anyway just join it man.
Jacob what can i do in order to change my mindset?
Coach Jacob, I have never expressed my complete feelings to a woman.
The most I’ve done is writing songs about it, but never face to face.
Diego,
You really need to learn to let yourself out to a woman. When you do, the connection becomes more intense.
Women look for that raw desire and passion in men. Obviously they look for in in all your behaviors but when you can confront her and share with her how you really feel, it becomes amazing.
Slava,
For me to get out of my head when I’m on a date, I start focusing on her instead of myself. Instead of thinking when to escalate, I think about finding out what her inner beauty is. I look for how I can show how much I appreciate the kind of woman she is.
And when I do, I myself get turned on by thinking of her being the beautiful woman she really is… and when she feels that from me, “escalation” just happens.
Let the lover out of you boys!
When do I know that girl is getting tired of too many questions.? Or if your being needy??
I have this problem where I don’t know if im trying to be too funny or too clownish so girls are sometimes tired of me. So how can I know when this is happening? Also how do I know when the attraction is gone or when they are flirting back to you?
Mario,
Don’t worry about whether the attraction is gone yet or not. If they flirt with you, it’s good. That means they enjoy your company.
If you want more than just flirting, you have to lead her to more… by actually taking her out… or hanging out with her more often.
As far as when are you asking too many questions… well that’s a feeling you’ll need to develop. Usually you can tell by whether you feel it’s time for you to talk or not.
As a guideline, i’d like to say that I like to go between 2-4 layers down in the conversation (going deeper) before I relate and share a story of my own.
You really don’t want to joke around all the time. You want to tease or relate once you actually have something to tease or relate about.
Hey coach Khiem/Ken-
whats going on?
relate as in me sharing some kind of point of view in her story??
Remember the Trust issue girl? Well I was telling her how she was passive-aggressive and I think I came off to strong. Maybe like a teacher telling the student what to do.
2-4 layers??
By hanging out I hanged out with this girl and her ex boyfriend was there. I just couldn’t get any alone time except at the end. We were in the bowling alley and it was just me and her and her girlfriend. They were playing some slow music in the background and I told her. Hey lets dance. She was like okay. So we did for a bit. It was fun. thats when the attraction was at its peak too bad i missed the chance. Now i just see her but i havent hanged out with her. She just likes to hang out with friends. So what should I do about this?
Shes the type of girl that talks to every guy and laughs. So maybe what might come around to me as flirting is actuallly how she is? What can I do to find out?
Hey Jacob!
I’m just at David’s right now looking at some videos he just shot with Will. Lots of these probably will go on the membership site. What’s going on with you?
Coach Khiem, thanks for giving me a hand!
I have been reading these blogs for a while now, and I’ve realized I had become too restrained, like a mummy but in my heart. When I was a kid I used to be a lot more “me” -I had my first kiss at age 10!
Somewhere along the line, I lost it. My parents’ divorce had to do with it, but I’m done playing the blame game. I’m the only one who can help me out! Everyone’s encouragement in here is essential for that to happen, though…
I am working on letting myself out with women. Earlier in the day, I was chatting online with this slim brunette I went to high school with. I invited her to a gig this Wednesday, and said “I’d love to share my music with you”. Her response was “I had wanted to see play a long time ago.” That felt real good. I told her how I really felt, and she responded accordingly!
Mario,
You should post a lot of these questions in the membership forums.
Anyhow, for the girl who likes to hang out with friends a lot… it means she likes peer approval.
You should try to hang out with her 1-on-1 if you can but if it’s not possible, then hang out with her and her friends but try to have some alone time every so often. If that’s still not possible, befriend and make her friends love you.
If they love you, and you show interest in her, her friends will nudge her and be like: why aren’t you going out with him?
In regards to 2-4 layers, it just means I ask 2-4 questions so I can get deep enough in a topic… then I can share my own story… or share my perspective of her story. You want to relate on something significant, not so superficial.
but thats the thing her friends like me. I talk to one of them and she seems pretty cool with me. Yet I dont know man.
One of my troubles is that I tend to interview the girl to much. I dont know how to make the conversation relate to her as well as me.
Peer-approval???
Hey Khimmi-
I am on facebook checking up few messages, chllin out listening to some great music, and reading all the new comments.
Cool the members are getting new videos.
Mario,
Peer approval just means that all her girlfriends would want her to date you.
And as far as how to stop interviewing girls, just follow the guidelines I told you already. In addition, start speaking from the heart. Don’t just talk about facts, share with her how you feel on certain aspects of your life and ask her the same about her life.
Also, it’s all about having fun… do you tease her, do you flirt with her? All that kind of stuff is emotional… not logical or factual.
yea i tease her. How would you know if you are though? Or if you are flirting?
I have fun, we sing to some of the songs she has on her ipod and we act them out in the bus. like cupid’s chokehold by Gym class heroes.
And yea i need to get more emotional in my conversations. Get to feel them. I need help in the “I feel..” type of conversations.
Just record some conversations for me and I’ll critique you. If not, do more storytelling exercises like we told you on the membership site.
If you can’t listen to yourself and feel excited or interested in what you say, then she won’t either.
another thing is that people always tell me to lead the way yet i dont really know wat it truly means. Anyone care to explain?
Mario,
You are asking too many questions that aren’t in the scope of this blog. If you want your questions answered, go post them in the forums.
As far as leading, it’s all about making decisions. When you are in a group setting, people always look for someone to lead… which means.. choose for the group… and then tell them what to do, with the interest of the group in mind.
It means… give the interaction a direction… make it go somewhere.
oh ok.
In scope of the blog. For someone to get out of the friend zone he should start showing his emotions toward the girl. He should be more affectionate but then wouldn’t the friend act all weird???
Wouldn’t the girl however end up staying with the friend cause she woulnd’t want to lose him and she’s already confident enough to share stories with him? Or would she say no? Im confused in that part.
Great blog and great lesson to learn.
Friend zone.. been there, done that. Not nice.
What I find interesting is to tell between a “slow cooking” relationship and getting slowly stuck into the friends zone.
Opinions?
Diego–That’s great about the brunette. It’s good that you have a frame of reference to when you were a kid and how you were more “you” and loose. Yes, divorce can arrest your development and hold you back but… Go back to that kid! That is something we tell people all the time. Be more like a kid…more playful, carefree and in the moment. You don’t see little kids stopping from going up to someone or playing with something they want. Can you imagine a kid saying to themselves “I wonder what I should say next so that she’ll like me” “should I ask her where she got the shovel from?”
When I say escalate, I mean escalate the conversation. Not the girl. Is that PUA terminology??
Well I got out of the Friend Zone. But now I am in the Defriend Zone.
If I get out of it I will let everyone know how it goes. lol
Just do it!!!!
If she is interested, she will respond with a positive.
If she hesitates, you are probably in the friend zone. I suggest people become friends first, ie if you are looking for a long term committed relationship.
When you feel sexy, you most often will come across sexy to others. (This does not automatically mean they will be interested in you.)
Set up your expectations for success. Go out, have fun… even if you are thinking ‘this could be the one’. Play it cool, enjoy… they may not be the one in a future spouse way but could become your best friend, and you may meet someone through them… keep your mind open to limitless possibilities and be positive.
Just do it!!!!
If she is interested, she will respond with a positive.
If she hesitates, you are probably in the friend zone. I suggest people become friends first, ie if you are looking for a long term committed relationship.
When you feel sexy, you most often will come across sexy to others. (This does not automatically mean they will be interested in you.)
Set up your expectations for success. Go out, have fun… even if you are thinking ‘this could be the one’. Play it cool, enjoy… they may not be the one in a future spouse way but could become your best friend, and you may meet someone through them… keep your mind open to limitless possibilities and be positive.
I gotta say, I really enjoyed reading this blog and the comments. Jacob, you sound like a very conscious and aware person both of your own being and others. I really can use some advice on the following…
Recently I was getting to know someone. This is the first woman I’ve spent time with in years, literally, so it was like getting cold water thrown on me when I realized this woman was interested in me. She flat out told me that she had a crush on me and I froze like a deer in the headlights. I slowcooked for too long, was very nervous, and found out by asking that I had landed firmly in the friend zone.
I think Cathy’s advice might be the most pertinent, really when she says “they may not be the one in a future spouse way but could become your best friend, and you may meet someone through them… keep your mind open to limitless possibilities and be positive.” It’s the same advice I got from my best friend. “She may be A one – not THE one”…
I know I was coming from a point of neediness and needing outside approval. It also led me to realize certain intimacy issues and issues with confidence.
My question is generally, timeframe wise…what is your general input on how much time to spend with someone initially -how often to see them and talk with them?
I’m also interested in some general advice regarding …Anyways, if there is anything to interpret from here I appreciate it. This is a message I received from her:
“I’ve been giving this situation some thought and I wanted to let you know what my thoughts are.
We’ve been hanging out for a while now and from the very beginning it has been unclear to me how you feel about me. I got the impression that what has developed over the last few months could have been romantic but never happened that way and just turned into a nice friendship. At this point in time I really like you a lot and I value this friendship and from my point of view this is where I would like to keep it.
I don’t know if this contradicts your feelings or if you are on the same page as me but this how I’m feeling. I just needed to let you know where I stand.
I hope we can still get together one day this week or next week.
I’ll talk to you soon!”
and this is what I wrote back a couple days later after an “I read this and want to let things digest for a bit…ill talk to you soon” message to her that day…
“To be honest, I have been thinking about this too. I really appreciate your honesty and openness and that what you wrote was meant to be gentle. I’ll tell you more of how I feel and was feeling. I was approaching our time together with an open mind without preconceived notions of where it was going. I also wanted to see if something more would continue to grow from a friendship. There were times when we were together and I felt something more than friendship in my heart but was scared of expressing it – I wasn’t playing games – I’m pretty cautious – even moreso in the winter.
I feel we are relating to one another and that is valuable. I sincerely value and appreciate the time we spend talking and being together and that we can express ourselves to one another. It’s fun, is teaching me alot, providing growth, and I hope you feel the same. I think it’s worth continuing and that we have alot to share with one another about our experiences and interests.
I’d like to get together soon too.”
Any input on those points is really appreciated.
Ey, what about to date co-workers?
(IDK if this question was made here somewhere in some blog, I didn’t see yet)
This is something, you know, it bothers me really, since I got a crush on a woman in other Company’s branch I have to visit often, and she is extremely sweet with me, take time to talk to me, ask me a bunch of question how is my life, sharing stuff, I’m cool, she is cool,she makes coffee for both, and things going forever, like time doesn’t exist, etc,
I know she is normally sweet like that, but very conservative with other people, at least when I can see her or I am with her.
She is so feminine, and I feel naturally a relaxed man talking in kind of deep calm voice I have (even when my heart pound crazy inside). I believe we both notice each other not going to the friend zone, well that’s what I think.
She also stand from her chair and huge me on her own and with her full body stick to mine (I swear God) when I say I got to go, and I feel my body melting right in there. She doesn’t stop smiling me with her sweet romantic eyes, and at that point I want to jump and kiss her.
But, man! I keep holding myself to ask her straight or do something, since, if something goes wrong and she reject me because I got it all wrong, (it’s ok actually for me if happen even if it hurts), but we have to see each other after that continuously, and I don’t like the sensation, it is not the same as if you meet a women anywhere else you won’t come back and forget about it.
And it is not either to say or do something on front of someone else, since most of the time, we are in an office alone for long time.
What do you think guys? (BTW, I’m not trolling, I’m saying the true)
(IDK where to put this question, I hope someone can share his/her idea about it)
So here’s some food for thought… perhaps the guys who are anxious of falling into the friends trap, are the ones that need to work on improving their self-confidence. Let me explain. Perhaps the reason that their mindset is set on ‘friends’ is because it is the only way that they can relax when they are going on a date – i.e. self talk “Tom, don’t be nervous, just think of it as though you are going to meet your friend Vanessa”. Rather than self talk “Tom, you look good, you’re a great catch, just enjoy the evening and see whether there’s enough attraction and commonality to see her again…”
Kheim, you have a lot to learn about women. What are your qualifications for coaching men about women? I can help you, if you’re not to proud to ask…
tomtom
you NEED to ask her out bro. if she’s hugging you and all that crap it’s obvious she has SOME attraction to you.
as for the coworker thing, its okay in my opinion as long as you sort it out if you break up. But back to the girl. You should definitely ask her out or ask her if she wants to go out and grab a coffee or whatnot. if you want it to be at a more slower pace, than grab some coffee and bring it to her.
There was an experiment named “Shrodinger’s Cat”. This experiment was where there was a cat put into a box with a vial of poison that would break open at a random time. For the time being, until they opened the box, they would refer to the cat as dead and alive, because they were unsure.
This is just like your relationship with that girl. You don’t know if it will work out, or not work out. You will only find out by asking her out (in the cat’s case, it was opening the box).
Take a leap of faith, you never know where it will take you. In the meantime, everyone undergoes a situation where they dont suck it up and grow some balls, so don’t feel too left out, it’s happened to me as well. But the thing is, you still have a chance to ask her out, in my case, it’s too late cuz my girl had to move.
hey mario, here’s the point of view from a girl who has many male friends/aquantances:
i’m not shy. if i like a guy–as a friend or as a potential date–i’m going to hang around him and flirt with him. when he walks in the room i’ll say “hey, here’s the life of the party!” go up to him and talk to him. tease him. if he ribs me, i’ll rib him.
but what if i’m actually interested in him? i’ll wait around for him–seek him out–especially if i have all the time in the world. i’ll sit next to him and talk to him about anything and everything. his sister will know i like him. my girlfriends will know i like him. i’ll deal with proximity/touching that normally i wouldnt be comfortable with (is his hand on my knee?) i’ll say “i’m just bugging not-so-random-people” (meaning, yes, i’m following you) i’ll say “walk me to my car” just so i can talk to him without his sister tagging along, even tho my car is only less than 100 yards away in a very safe parking lot.
so, check out how she reacts to other guys. does she seek you out first? how does she deal with touching? you know she is friends with so-and-so but wouldnt ever date him. is she fine with him giving her a hug? yes? well, what if he lets his knee rest against hers? (yes, seems simple and of no consequence, but no woman will allow a man’s leg even touch her own unless she is VERY interested in him. well, i guess i cant speak for ALL women)
find a reference point and see how you rate. even tho she is outgoing, she still may not have the courage to come up to you and say “i like you” plain-as-day.
if you do ask her out and she says no, i’m pretty sure your friendship will return to normal. i dont know her, so i cannot say for sure. but it’s worth a try on your part.
hope this helps!
So me and my girlfriend of 1 year broke up about 3 weeks ago. the relationship really ended a little over a month ago, but thats semantics. I really do love her, she is a great person, and I want to be her friend. the thing is though I also still want more from her and the stupid monkey chatter in my head from my penis is keeping me from being her friend. I know she wont come back with me even though I want her to, but I still really want her in my life. these conflicting ideas are driving me crazy!! Is it actually possible to be friends with a girl you have been more than friends with?
That picture is the perfect friend zone example. The movie was “He’s just not into you” Scarlett johannsen treats this dude like shit all the while sleeping with cooper bradleys character. Finally they have sex when he finally Maned up. Perfect example. good job guys…
Great post! Another thing that I hope your readers can remember is that the friend zone has yielded many men the perfect launch into a serious and committed relationship. I can think of 3 men that each married a woman who had placed him in the friend zone. Each man played it cool, and before the women knew what was happening, they fell head over heals in love.
Bottom line – don’t sweat it! Relax and enjoy like David suggests…
I agree with Cathy. Just do it! If you want to find love you have to put yourself out there.
Great Article David
This is a great post!!!
The thing about being close friends with women who you are interested in is that it is also very good practice, if your not going for them, to have conversations and do things that you would normally do to people that you find interesting and attractive.
Being outcome independent and being dependent to converse with everyone will really bring ppl to you, it is very attractive and will yield many benefits, maybe even that close female friends of yours.
Need some advice:
An ex and I started talking again after four years. For a whole year we just had a phone friendship, she asked me out a few times but I politely declined saying I was busy, when in reality I just didn’t know if I wanted to repeat history with her again.
We finally went out and after going to one bar to another she ended up talking with another old guy friend, than his brother, one of her old flings, sat down. I began to feel uncomfortable and felt like it did matter if I was there or not so I told her I was going to head home.
I was pissed but kept it hidden. I felt like she totally disrespected me, especially after the two of us not seeing each other for four years.
Since that night, she has kind of flaked out on me. I invited her and her 13 year old daughter to a friends BBQ, she was hesitant at first but agreed to go…unless it rained, which it did. I was cool with that and went with one of my friends and had a blast.
Later I told her we made the right decision by not going together to the BBQ and told her it was boring at first but then it was a blast later. She got all pissed off, saying I have the time of my life with old friends but am bored with her…WTF?
Anyway…I took her and her daughter to a movie last weekend and than spent the night talking, flirting and laughing…we both seemed to have a good time and she suggested we do this again, when her daughter was with her dad.
Here is my concern, I think she may of began seeing her old fling she met at the bar…she doesn’t initiate contact with me like she used to and when she does it’s just to talk as friends, which is fine because that is all we are at this point.
Should I continue the friendship, knowing it will probably end up as possibly nothing more than friends, or just move on. Lately she has been on my mind a lot and it’s driving me insane!!!
Sorry for the long post!
lol I just wanna know, is that E from entourage in the picture? hahaha
thanx david for ur posts !
I never tried this out ! Today i went out and started approaching with women .Though the first one shot me down . But i kept on trying and at the of the day i got 15 women’s number ! i never knew that i had soo much power in me !
Again
THANKS DAVID FOR UR SUPPORT !
Thank you for your posts David. But To everyone reading this I have a question, and I need your help. I have been talking to this girl Christine for a while. She’s great. Along with her great personality, we have a lot in common. We’ve been flirting a lot through texting, and in person, but I want to know how to tell her how I feel about her without coming off as creepy, or coming off as weird. I’m also a little afraid of if I went in to kiss her, she would reject me. If I could get some tips from anyone out there it would be great. Thanks so much.
I like this post and the part about escalating.
My situation: I was out with a girl that I like, for the fourth time. What we do aren’t dates, (don’t think she considers them as such) but we spend time together. We do something in the afternoon (she often brings her child) and in the evening we have dinner somewhere. We also have long phone conversations. I recently told her that I really liked her and she responded that she doesn’t see us in a relationship. She sees me as a great guy, a good friend, a fun person. We will still make appointments and spend time together. I am wondering what I can do. Later she texted me telling me she doesn’t feel attraction, it has nothing to so with me as a person, she tried to reassure me. For some reason I have the feeling that some sort of tension is gone in my head. I have the feeling that I can behave more freely like myself, but I have to see next time. Is all hope lost, or is it possible she will change her mind in time? She enjoys her time with me.
Hi David, You mentioned in your newsletter today, sorry I don’t have the title. That as women we should follow up with men, say hello to them if we see them at the mall etc.. Be friendly and approachable. I agree with you and have done this often. Problem is, I find as a woman when I am friendly, and following up with my male friends they take it as that I am interested in them and also that I would want to go with them as a romantic partner. How I can I avoid this awkward and annoying situation and follow your advice? Thank you, Rose