The Demanding House Guest
May 2, 2010 
4 Comments
Have you ever had the demanding house guest come and stay at your house? You know, the one who seems to have lots of requests despite the fact that they are getting a free place to stay?
Recently I had a house guest who said to me, “Am I going to get my own room?” I said, “Yes, you are going to sleep on an air mattress in my office. We only have two bedrooms, and the second bedroom is basically Sonja’s storage room.
So he said to me, “Nothing with a door?” I said, “No. You are going to be on the third floor of my house, though, and no one will be up there but you.” He said, “I am a really private person. Can you maybe clean up the second bedroom so I can sleep in there?”
This really surprised me. You are someone’s guest. They are saving you money. They are putting you up and allowing your energy in their house for a few days. I know when I stay at someone’s house, all I ever care about is whether a bed and thanking the person for letting me stay with them.
Some people, however, are very demanding when they are a house guest. Some people need to always have their things around them, and they can’t get out of their comfort zone.
So how does this tie into dating? It does. When you sleep over someone’s house for the very first time, are you cool about it or are you demanding about it?
The great thing about life is experiencing different things. Another great thing about life is being open. You need to open yourself up if you are a demanding house guest.
I know when I went to visit Sonja’s family in New Orleans, I preferred to stay in a hotel because it was quieter and easier. Staying with her family, though, gives me an opportunity to really hang out with them and to get to know them better.
So maybe I am not as comfortable as I normally am by staying with them, but sometimes it is not about comfort. Sometimes it is about the experience of getting to know new people and letting them getting to know you.
Great blog,
It is important for us to go outside of our comfort zone. Growth happens outside of our comfort zone.
Well I could write a book on this one…. I used to have international studetns living with me and one in particular was like the Devil Wears Prada. I thought she was really nice, sweet innocent, blah blah… everyone else told me to be careful.
I almost became a co-dependent. She wouldn’t eat this and then she only liked it when she liked it, all my bills went up astronomically. She left taps running all night and didn’t even apologise – all throughout I was nice – even at the end… then no thank you for living with me for 3 months – and I was quite out of pocket when it should have been at least a minimal income.
On a very positive note though – I also learnt a lot about myself from the experience AND had at least another 15 students before her who were a genuine pleasure to have:)
I was worried about spending a weekend in a small house with 10 other people, but it turned out to be a lot of fun.
You are much nicer than I am. I would have suggested he might be more comfortable in a hotel. Maybe that says something about me, too…
People like this piss me the hell off. Being overly demanding when someone is going out of their way to help you out anyway is a sure-fire way to get the ‘never hear from me again’ treatment in my book.