“Dear David,

My self-confidence is really a problem. I’m 42 years old, never married, and very inexperienced with sex. Other stuff not a problem. I’ve had long relationships in my past and those guys were okay with it. Plus, I was younger and many of those guys were not interested in becoming fathers then either.

I made a choice to not risk an unwanted pregnancy in my 20s and 30s in conjunction with my personal beliefs and values. When guys did try to have sex with me, it was not in the context of a relationship. I had reached a point where I just wanted to know what it was like, and I’m sure I did not learn a lot from that.

While I’m not worried about it now as I have no intention of sleeping with someone just to enjoy dating, I want to know a man’s take on discovering this about a woman, especially later in life.

Anonymous”

This email at first kind of threw me. There are so many different religious beliefs about sexual intercourse, and I think they are very very antiquated. I really do.

I think sex is a wonderful thing. I think sex between two consenting adults is a wonderful thing. There are so many kinds of birth control out there nowadays that you don’t have to worry about getting pregnant.

I really truly believe that sexual experience is just a great thing to have, and that it’s great to explore and learn about your own sexuality. This woman is 42 years old, and she’s missed a lot of years of great sex due to her personal beliefs.

My advice to this woman, and to anybody in a similar situation and point in their life, is to really just explore sex and enjoy it. Tell men that you’re inexperienced, but that you’re willing to learn. Be open to the experience.

If I was with a woman who said she was very sexually inexperienced, I wouldn’t judge her at all. I would just enjoy it, teach her and explore her sexuality with her.

So if you truly want to learn about men and how to have great sex, this is how you do it. You need to just be honest with them. If you’re honest, then things will be great.

This is a really interesting topic. Guys, what are your thoughts on this? Have you known women who are really sexually inexperienced?

To the women, have any of you waited your whole life for the right man to come along, he hasn’t shown up, and now you’re in your 40′s with little or no sexual experience? What do you do about this situation?

I would love to hear from all of you on this.

I received an email from a woman who wanted to know how to get a guy to chase her. Chase – interesting.

I hate chasing women. I always hated chasing women. I thought it was such a waste of time. I really did. Either a woman is interested or she isn’t.

Even in college, women wanted me to chase. I got bored really quickly.

Granted, I’d ask her out. We’d hang out. We’d have a good time. I’d call her back. She would call me back. We’d get together again. We wouldn’t sleep together for a little while. You know, I’ve got to earn it (or build the trust). Whatever.

That, to me, is the version of chasing that I enjoy. It’s like a tennis game. It’s a volley. I like you. You like me. I call you. You call me back.

What I don’t like, and I disagree with, is the whole “I call you and you don’t call me back for three days” thing. A lot of women thing that by playing hard to get, that a man is going to want them more.

In reality, though, the only kind of guy who likes a woman who plays hard to get is the one who only is interested in sleeping with you. It’s a conquest for him.

I know in my 20s — in my “hound dog” stage of my life — that I loved when women played hard to get and would ignore me. I really did. It was fun when they ignored me.

I’d run into them a month later and say, “Man, are we ever going to hook up and go out?” I would just play the game right along with them.

After a while, I found the game to be such a waste of time. There are so many great people out there who don’t want to play games.

I think the majority of people don’t want to play games. So if you want a guy to chase you — if you want to play games — then you’re really just wasting your time.

The best thing to do is hand a guy your phone number and say, “Give me a call.” If he doesn’t call you, then your reaction should be “next!’

The best thing to do when a guy calls you to go out on a date, is call him back within 24 hours. Call him once. Don’t call a guy six times.

Call each other once. If the other person doesn’t call you back, then move on.

Really, stop playing all the games. Games are boring.

If you want to play a game, go play softball or tennis. Games are such a waste of time.

A lot of the time when men will talk to women, a woman might be interested but she’s also very nervous. So men will often not end up asking those women out due to what her body language is communicating.

When they’re nervous, a lot of women will have one foot in one direction and the other foot in another direction. Even though they’re smiling, their body language will say to a man that she’s half in and half out, which a man will interpret as disinterest.

He won’t be interpreting it consciously. It will be done subconsciously. This will be his interpretation nonetheless.

When you’re interested in a man, you need to hold your ground. You need to look directly at him, face him and smile. You can’t have one foot in one direction or a shoulder turned off in another direction.

Another thing that women do that absolutely does not work, is that they will have their arms folded. Even though they’re interested in a guy, they’ll have their arms folded when you’re talking to him. This is a defensive pose, not an open pose.

What you need to do instead, is to leave your arms open. Either have them at your side, or have them facing the guy (or use your hands when you’re talking). The minute you fold your arms, you are basically telling a guy — even if it’s on a very subconscious level — that you’re not interested.

Your eye contact is also really important. When you look down at the ground or off in the distance because you’re nervous, you are telling a guy you are not interested. Even if you are interested, when you look away from that person what he will process in his brain is that you are looking at someone else and isn’t interested.

So, once again, eye contact is really important. If you are uncomfortable with constant eye contact, then you can meet his eyes, look down and then come back and meet his eyes again. Just don’t look off in the distance, that will always tell a guy that you are not interested.

Another mistake that women make when talking to a man is fidgeting. Fidgeting with things when you’re talking to somebody tells him that you’re very nervous. You might be nervous because you like him, but a guy will likely interpret your fidgeting as a sign that you’re bored.

It’s amazing how much these little things communicate to the opposite sex. Being more aware of your body language in these situations will really help you get more men to ask you out (and, by extension, get you more dates).

If you want to know more about what you are saying to men with your body language, then have a friend go out with you and film you. Have your friend watch what you’re doing, how you’re reacting to things and how you flirt. Then you can watch not only yourself, but also see things the way a guy does.

It’s really funny. One time a woman did this and sent me the video. In the video she was flirting with a guy, but kept looking away because she was scared, nervous and intimidated by the guy.

When she sent me the video, she said to me that she didn’t know why the guy hadn’t asked her out. When I watched the video, I knew why the minute she looked away and the guy turned around to see at whom she was looking.

She was interested in that guy, and she thought she was showing interest to him. It’s amazing what your body language and you eye contact says, as compared to what your voice says. Be more aware of that, and you’ll see yourself having better flirting sessions, better dates, and a better dating life.

Now let me ask you a question… Do you want to know where are all the marriage-minded men are?

I thought you did… All you need to do is click here to find out where.

I also get a lot of women who email me and say something like, “I wish my boyfriend was more romantic.” Let me tell you something. There are also a lot of men who wish their girlfriend was more romantic.

For those women out there who are looking to be more romantic for your man, or to really light a fire in your relationship, here are seven quick tips on how to get your man to feel romantic:

1.Candles Are Not Just A “Woman Thing”: Candles are not only for women. Show your romantic intent by lighting candles all throughout the house that he’ll see when he walks through the door. It’s romantic, and it makes a man feel wonderful. So many women think that candles and champagne are things only women like. In reality, though, men react the same way to those things. A lot of men will set a romantic example of what they want by the romantic things they do for women, hoping the woman will do things like that back to him.

2.The Power Of A Simple Kiss: There is so much power in a simple kiss — a simple hello kiss, a simple goodnight kiss or a simple kiss before you leave in the morning. All of these things are romantic to a man. They make a man feel connected to you throughout the day. Those kisses make him feel wonderful in a way that lingers and will have him thinking about you all day long.

3.The No Special Reason Text: Send your man a simple text in the middle of the day saying, “Hey babe. I can’t get you out of my mind.” It will make him feel really good all day long. It will also make him feel very romantic as well.

4.Just A Note To Say…: It’s funny. A lot of men go out there and buy flowers for their woman or will write her a card, but how many women write their man a card? Think about writing your man a card just for the sake of it being a nice romantic gesture. You go to the supermarket or the drug store and you see a great little card there. Buy it, write him a little note and then leave it on his pillow so he’ll see it before he leaves in the morning. That way he can read it all day long. It is a great way to make a man feel romantic.

5.The Unexpected Surprise: Think about a way to surprise your man. Set a night where you will surprise him and he will not be expecting it. Instead of the usual Friday or Saturday night where you say “Hey babe, what do you want to do tonight?,” why don’t you create and plan a night for him. Take him out for a great meal or take him to a ball game. Take the initiative.

It’s amazing how men and women crave the same things, but yet don’t understand the dynamics of what their actions cause. Although a romantic night for a woman may be different than a romantic night for a man, it’s really all about the effort that you put into the night that makes the other person feel warm, special and romantic.

6.Set The Mood: Setting a special mood at home makes a man feel romantic. When he comes home from the office, for example, you could have his favorite music playing, rub his shoulders and tell him you want to hear all about his day. It’s the simple things like this that make a man feel romantic. Allowing a man to share his day with you makes a man feel very romantic.

7.Those Three Little Words: This one may seem a little too simple to you, but there is nothing that makes a man feel greater and more romantic than hearing the words “I love you” come out of your mouth. Say it when he walks through the door or when he helps you with something. It’s the unexpected ‘I love you’ that really gets men feeling amazing. Hearing a woman say “I love you” after a fight makes a man feel appreciative, special and romantic — especially when it is said from the heart.

It’s quite simple to make a man feel romantic. In so many ways, it is no different than the things a man can do to make you feel romantic. A lot of couples make the mistake of not doing these kind of things on a regular basis, and the romance dies as a result. It is the little things that make each other feel great and make each other feel romantic.

So if you are in a relationship that’s stagnant, feels like it’s just not ‘clicking’ anymore or in which the romance has died, then using even one or two of these tips will help you get the fire burning again. When you start doing romantic things for someone else and see their reaction, it will make you feel more romantic too.

Want to know if the guy you’re with is really the romantic type — or how to know right away when you meet a guy if he is commitment material? Then CLICK HERE to find out.

Women who have a lot of masculine energy need to dress more sexy. They need to put themselves out there a little bit more.

Do you know what masculine energy is?

Masculine energy in a woman can be a woman who is very successful in her career. She competes with men all day long, so she’s basically masculine. She’s battling men all day long in the business world, so she’s masculine.

She’s looking for a raise. She has to fight her boss, so she’s masculine.

When she goes on a date, she takes that same masculine with her, and takes the guy’s balls and chops them into a million little pieces. When a man is trying to flirt with a woman on a date who has a lot of masculine energy, she basically ends up going into interrogation mode.

She will talk to him the same way she would talk when she’s trying to negotiate a business deal. She doesn’t bring out her feminine energy.

So what is feminine energy and what does it look like on a date? Feminine energy is dressing sexy, flirting with the guy, leaning in when he talks and looking directly in his eyes. Those are one part of it.

Another part of it is learning how to throw a bone to a guy every so often, and then making sure he jumps on it. Learn how to give a man clues, and give him the opportunity pick up on them and take the lead.

That’s how a woman should act around a man. Throw a bone then allow him to lead. You want him to take action.

You don’t want to be the one taking the action all the time. Every time you take action, you emasculate him.

I mean, most guys may not initially see it like that, but eventually it will deteriorate the type of relationship you have. If you want a “guy’s guy,” you have to give him a bone every so often and make sure he picks up on it.

Now I know there are some people reading this right now who are mistakenly thinking that I am telling women to be passive and submissive to men. I am actually saying the opposite.

A big part of feminine energy is being open. It is also being the decision-maker in terms of choosing men with whom you want to be willing at times to be led. It’s allowing yourself to surrender at appropriate moments.

So how do you develop your feminine energy, and feel amazing and sexy in your own skin? Take a look at your body type.  Take a look at the type of woman you are.  

Start looking through magazines which contain pictures of women with your body type. If you’re a little heavier, look at magazines that have heavier women in there so you can see how they dress sexy.  

Go to a store and get a makeover.  Find a way that you can express your sexuality.  

Men are attracted to all body types. The key thing here, though, is that men are attracted to sexy women of all body types.  

So women really need to explore that a little bit more, so that they can use their feminine energy when they start flirting with men. Doing that will get you noticed so much more — and you, as a woman, will also start to have a lot more fun in your dating life.

As humans, we always speculate. We always feel the need to know the outcome of things. We always want to think about “what if…”

We speculate on the stock market. We speculate all the time when it comes down to picking a stock.

We speculate on football games. How many times do you watch a football game and say to yourself, “Man, if he only man if he only threw that pass. How could he have NOT thrown that pass?!”

We also do a lot of speculating when it comes to human emotions. The conversation that the two guys I heard talking on the beach were having is a perfect example.

One guy was saying to the other, “I got her off several times. I don’t understand why she didn’t call me back. I don’t get it.” Then he went into speculation mode, in which he speculated about all the possible reasons why she didn’t call him back.

He said, for example, that she probably felt too free sexually with him and that made her uncomfortable because she wasn’t used to feeling that way. He wanted his friend to speculate about this woman’s emotions and agree with him.

Keep in mind that the friend with whom he was doing this speculating had never met this woman. Usually the person who is being asked to speculate on what someone is feeling has never met the person about whom they are being asked to speculate.

The speculators nevertheless will speculate just to make their friend feel good. This is the speculation game. It’s really ridiculous, but yet we do it all the time.

We go to our friends for advice. We break down a situation that’s going on in our dating life, and then our friends speculate on what they think the other person — whom they have never met — is thinking.

Obviously the speculating friend is trying to make their friend feel better by doing this. Sometimes in life, though, you’ve got to just let some things go.

The fact of the matter is that unless you are prepared to go directly to the source, you will never know what someone is really thinking. Never. You will never know what they were really thinking, so why play the speculation game?

If someone doesn’t call you back, and you don’t know the reason why from the source (i.e., the person who didn’t call you), then it’s okay because you already have your answer. The answer is that you don’t know. When that happens, you have to learn to let things go.

You’ll never learn the answer to everything in life, so why play the speculation game? The speculation game can really drive you crazy.

Also, think a little bit about the people you are asking to be the speculators. They were not present for any of the events you are telling them about and they almost always have never met the person about whose feelings and thoughts you are asking them to speculate. So why are you letting these people make you feel better?

In life, you need to learn to just let things go. Successful quarterbacks have to master this in order to be successful.

Here’s a great example of that. A few weeks ago, Kurt Warner threw five interceptions in one game. During the next couple week’s games, he came back and threw six touchdown passes. When asked about this, he basically said ‘I have a short memory.’

It’s time that all of you adopt the same mentality in your dating life. You need to develop a short memory that allows you to no longer play the speculation game.

Doing this can get you “out there” and dating a lot more quickly. You’ll also be a lot happier. So let’s eliminate the speculation game, and start enjoying ourselves more.

If we do that, then maybe the speculators will have to find work doing other things. Who knows, instead of speculating on human emotions they maybe decide to go into the stock trading business and start speculating there. It could be a good move for them, since it’s basically the same guessing game.

This is what I call being completely oblivious to all signals. I wonder how this guy is with women. Watch this video I’m going to call “Training Beyond Belief” and judge for yourself:

Being visual does not refer to what men find attractive, but rather how they become attracted to women. It means that you need to use your sexuality and your femininity to attract men.

A man will look at a woman many times — five, six, seven, ten, twelve times — and will not stop looking until a woman acknowledges him. A woman who knows and understands this, can easily get a man to approach by acknowledging him. It’s really very simple.

Say you see a man to whom you are attracted. You need to look directly at him and smile. If he notices you, then go back and smile at him again.

When you do this, the man will become very curious and wonder why you’re smiling at him over and over again. You need to encourage him to come over to you.

Understand that men are basically Scooby Doos on steroids. You’re the Scooby Snack, and you need to lay the crumbs down for men.

The crumbs are your smiles. The crumbs are a casual hello. Once a man spots a woman to whom he is attracted, you are able to go and lead him with your femininity and your smile to come over to you.

In order to really learn and understand this at a deeper level, though, you need to be observant about all your surroundings. You have to be able to look around at all your surroundings and know that men are looking at you all the time.

Most women are not observant. Most women walk into a place with their head in the clouds — on their BlackBerry or thinking about what’s on their “to do” list — and never notice men noticing them.

So one of the best things to do to learn how to be more observant is to go out in the field with a friend for a day. Have your friend be your “wing girl” for the day, with her job all day long being just to observe you and to notice all the men who are checking you out.

By doing that, and by having her point all these men out to you, you will see all the opportunities you are missing to meet men every single day. Most women have opportunities to meet men that present themselves all day long, but unfortunately they are almost never looking!

Women have been taught not to look. Men, on the other hand, are looking at women nonstop.

Men never stop looking for women. Men are always looking for women, talking about women and obsessing about women. That is how men are visual. So in order for you to become better at this, you need to learn to be more aware of your surroundings.

When I talk about using your femininity and your sexuality, I am not talking about being “slutty” or overtly coming on to men all day long. I am talking about sexuality and femininity that exudes from within.

For example, women who have a lot of masculine energy need to dress more sexy. Many women end up having very masculine energy about them due their careers. You need to feel sexy as a woman. You need to put yourself out there more. You need to really explore your feminine side.

Take a look at your body type. Take a look at the type of woman you are. Start looking through magazines that have women with similar body types to you in them. See how those women dress sexy. Go to a store and get a makeover. Find a way to express your sexuality and to feel sexy from within yourself.

Men are attracted to all body types and to all types of women. The key thing here, though, is that men are attracted to sexy women of all body types.

So women really need to explore that side of themselves more. Women need to learn to use their feminine energy and start flirting. The Scooby Doos out there will respond when you do.

I realized that I am perfect (6-0) picking football games this year, and I am so ready to put out this week’s picks and to keep that perfect record intact. Some of the NFL’s 3-0 teams will not be unbeaten after this week, but I will remain unbeaten with my picks for this week.

So for this week, I like the Houston Texans and the New York Giants to win. The Tennessee Titans will will their first one. The San Francisco 49ers will rebound. The Cincinnati Bengals will crush the self-proclaimed genius Mangenius, who could go down in history as the dumbest coach ever to coach in the NFL. My last pick is that Favre will get redemption this week.

Now onto today’s blog…

Good boy! Good boy! What a good boy!

You cleaned the house! Good boy! You look good tonight for my parents. Good boy! Wow, you picked up the kids today! Good boy!

If you guys are thinking that I am possibly a dog that drives or a dog that puts on a new collar for the parents, you are absolutely wrong!

I am talking about the way that men like to be praised. I am talking about the way men need to be praised.

It is so funny with men (and I’m making fun of my own gender, so I can). We are really very simple-minded at times.

What does every man want to hear from his woman after sex? He wants to hear, “Baby, that was the greatest thing I’ve ever felt. You are such an amazing lover!”

When he gets dressed, every man wants to hear that he looks good. He wants his ego stroked a little bit by hearing something like, “Wow, you look so hot today!”

Every man who does a task around the house wants to be patted on the back. He wants to hear what a great job he did. He wants to hear, “It was so great that you took the garbage out today. You are amazing!”

It is amazing how simple it is to please a man. It really is.

You won’t believe how long we stick around if we know that we are your best lover, or that we give you the best advice advice, or that we look good and you find us super-sexy. We are actually a lot like dogs.

Like dogs, we need to be fed. They say that the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach, but I that a way to a man’s heart is really through his emotional stomach.

It’s funny. Women ask me all the time, “I just can’t seem to keep a man happy. Why?” Really? We have a manual that comes with us. It is only one page long. You just have to read it.

The women’s manual is more like one hundred pages long. You have emotions all the time. If you are PMSing, we can’t say certain things (or you take things differently). If we tease you during PMS, you freak out. If we say the wrong thing, you freak out.

When you tell us what you’re feeling during those times, we get defensive because we don’t understand things we don’t experience. As men, our manual is a whole lot shorter.

So, women, just think of us as giant, overgrown Scooby-Doos. Remember to tell us “Good Boy!” the next time a man does something (and the next time you want him to do something).

Be very specific when you’re talking to a man or when you want to talk to a man. You can’t just say, “Hey Babe, my parents are coming by tonight. Can you straighten the house up?”

You say that, and we’ll just find the obvious things. We will go to the sink, find the biggest bowl and put it in the dishwasher. If the toilet seat is up, we’ll put it down.

With men you need to be very specific in your instructions. Tell him, “Hey Babe, my parents are coming. Can you straighten up the kitchen, fluff the pillows and make the bed?”

Then, when you get home, don’t forget to praise us. Don’t forget to tell us, “You did a good job. Good boy!”

If you are all looking for some extra motivation today, check out what this master motivator has to say:

There is not a good seat in the house, and it’s the most poorly run place I’ve ever seen. It took an hour to get the car out of the parking lot. An hour! I pulled out of the parking space and could see the exit, but we just couldn’t get to it. They just had no clue how to move traffic.

The show itself was great! There was the Internet rumor that they were doing a fifteen minute cover of Michael Jackson’s “Billy Jean” at all of their shows. You’ve got to love the Internet. The song “Billy Jean” is three minutes long . . . and so was the cover version that Coldplay did last night.

I love how rumors start. So let’s start our own rumor today. I don’t know what I want to start, but there’s got to be something we can start. Give me some time, I’ll come up with something during the day (and maybe I’ll post it in the comments).

Otherwise, let’s get into today’s truth . . .

In a recent blog, I discussed how women can know if a man is attracted to them on a date. Now let’s talk about how a woman can keep that attraction going.

Men love to be teased. If a man touches your arm during the course of a date, touch him a few times back. That will drive him crazy. When you go to the bathroom, get up and on the way to the bathroom touch his shoulder and whisper “I’ll be right back” in his ear. That will really drive him crazy!

When he’s talking and leaning into you, lean into him so he can feel your closeness. When he goes to kiss you on the cheek, give him a quick kiss on the lips, a quick smile, and then walk away. As you’re walking away, turn around and give him another smile.

Also, compliment a man during a date. Tell him you’re having a good time. Laugh at his silly jokes. This will keep him intrigued.

These are some simple techniques that you can use to flirt and let a man know that you’re interested

“Do you think the reason why men start having wandering eyes is because a girlfriend is so much fun in bed for three months, and then she gets boring?”

My answer to that is: men’s eyes will always wander. Men are visual, and they will always check out other women. This does not mean that they are going to sleep with those women, but men will always check out other women no matter how good the sex is with their partner.

The men who tend to act on the wandering eyes are men that are either chronic cheaters or are with a woman with very limited sexual creativity. The “chronic cheater” is all about finding a new conquest no matter how good their current partner is in bed.

Men who are with women who have the sexual creativity of a Yugo may also act on their wandering eye. Men get tired of driving a Yugo.

Whether you are a woman who wants to keep her man satisfied, or whether you’re a man who wants to keep his woman satisfied, you must realize that such satisfaction is a two-way street! If you want to keep your partner from wandering, I suggest you become more of a Mercedes . . . One day you let the man ride really fast in your nice tight leather seat, and the other day you just drive really slowly to give him a different sensation when you’re rounding the curves.

Why am I using a car analogy? Because sex is like driving . . . after a while the same road and the same traffic get boring!

Here are 5 Quick Ways To Keep Your Partner Fascinated With You:

1. Send dirty emails and dirty texts to them all day, & they will anticipate being with you that night.

2. Before you go out at night, have great foreplay…and that’s it! Make them wait for the rest of the sexual act.

3. Try having sex in different rooms in the house. If you’re having sex on the bed every single time, have sex swinging from chandeliers and laying on the kitchen table.

4. Please your partner and expect nothing in return…this will drive them crazy!

5. Talk about your sexual fantasies with each other, and start acting on them one at a time to give you each something to look forward to.

The wandering eye is a two way street. So if you’re getting boring in bed, you’d better start being more creative with your head!