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Sunday, August 29th, 2010
Do you know a surefire sign that your relationship is on the edge, and is going downhill? It’s when you start masturbating again, and actually start enjoying it.
Think about your past relationships at the point they were ending, or at the point when you and your partner were “on the outs.” All of a sudden you get to a point in the relationship where you’re having sex, you’re fighting, and you’re not really connecting.
Then one day you’re angry because you haven’t had enough sex, so you beat off. You think to yourself, “This isn’t bad. I can do this again.” The next time you fight with your partner and have sex, you realize it’s not really working at all. You jerk off again.
Pretty soon you are jerking off a couple of times a week. You start to not care anymore about having sex with your partner. You are able to fight with your partner without any emotion.
You become a lot more mellow because you’re not dying for them. You’re not relying on them sexually. You’re not needing them sexually anymore. You’re just basically alright with wherever you are.
It’s the weirdest thing, but if you think about it there is almost a cycle to masturbation.
When you first meet a woman (or a man), you’re really hot for them — and even have sexual fantasies when you think about them — so you masturbate.
Then you start having sex with that person all the time, and you don’t need to masturbate anymore.
You will masturbate for fun, like if you masturbate together. You show each other how you touch yourself. You turn each other on that way.
Maybe you will masturbate alone if you’re not with your partner for a week. You’ll always tell your partner about it, though, and turn each other on by doing that.
At some point in the relationship, you start masturbating two or three times a week, and are hardly having sex anymore with your partner. You start to think, “What went wrong here?”
What went wrong is that you’re not connecting anymore. What went wrong is that you’re not sexually turned on by that person anymore.
At that point, you realize that it’s not worth it – what you’re going through in that relationship — because you’re not connecting and you’re fighting all the time. Looking at when, how and why you’re masturbating in a relationship is usually an indication of what’s going on in that relationship.
Popularity: 4%
Tags: advice, Breakups, david wygant, Marriage, masturbation, Relationships, Sex, tips
Posted in Breakups, Marriage, Masturbation, Rejection, Relationships | 3 Comments »
Thursday, August 26th, 2010
Yes sir! Yes Ma’am!
One time, I went to a seminar where all the guy leading the seminar wanted the audience to do was to say “Yes!” over and over again. No matter what the seminar leader said, he expected the audience to respond to with just one word: Yes!
You don’t ever want to be a “yes man” (or a “yes woman”). Why are you saying yes? Why are people “yes men” or “yes women?”
The reason is that they are insecure. They actually feel like nobody wants them, so when they find someone with whom to have a relationship, they agree with everything.
They’re so afraid to rock the boat. They’re so afraid that if they don’t say yes to everything that they’re going to lose this person and never have a chance at another relationship again.
Unfortunately they are unaware of one thing. The truth is that nobody wants to be with a “yes man” (or a “yes woman”).
It drives me crazy to be around these kind of people. I have friends who are “yes men,” and have been stuck in conversations like this:
DW: “Do you want Thai food?”
YesMan: “Yes.”
DW: “How about Mexican food?”
YesMan: “Sure.”
DW: What do you want to eat?
YesMan: “I want whatever you want.”
I really can’t stand it.
Stand up for yourself, have an opinion on things and don’t be afraid to communicate. People will respect you more.
I never respect “yes people.” If someone yes’s me to death, I don’t respect them because they don’t feel like my equal.
Everyone is each other’s equal. So if you feel like you’ve been a “yes man” or a “yes woman” in relationships, then it’s time for you to start saying the magic word: No!
These are two letters you need to learn — “n” and “o.” Use them. Be one with “no.”
Popularity: 4%
Tags: advice, dating, dating advice for men, dating advice for women, david wygant, flirt with women, how to approach women, how to be a better communicator, how to meet women, self help, tips
Posted in College Dating, Dating Etiquette, High School Dating | 6 Comments »
Saturday, August 14th, 2010
Your penis does the least amount of thinking. I was on the phone with a client of mine, and we were talking about how many guys are totally about validation. When they walk over to a woman, all they are thinking about is whether she will like them.
In reality, what is going on in that situation is that your penis is talking to you. It is saying, “Hey, Mr. Big Head up there. Yeah, you between the shoulders. Mr. Penis here. Listen, man, I think this girl is really hot and really want to get into her.  So try not to f^*k it up this time. Please don’t say the wrong thing, because I really want to hit that vagina tonight. Please don’t f^*k it up and say that stupid thing you said last time you approached a woman. Play it safe this time.”
This is what your penis is doing. Your penis is controlling your head. If it wasn’t, then your head would be thinking “I’m a cool guy. Man, I’m awesome. I’m great. There is a pretty girl over there, but who cares? There are tons of pretty girls in the world. I’m just looking for the one I can really connect with who really gets me. Let me go over and talk to her and see what she’s all about. Let’s see if I even like her at all. I’ll ask her out for a cup of coffee and get to know her a little bit.”
That is what the rational mind would be saying. The problem, however, is that we are so driven by what’s inside our pants. We are so driven by Mr. Penis. Since Mr. Penis doesn’t understand anything rational, he gives his power away every single time.
So the next time you see a good-looking woman, stop looking for validation. Stop listening to Mr. Penis. When you do that, you will realize that you are an amazing person.
This is exactly what I did so that my penis never controlled how successful my approaches were. CLICK HERE to listen to me go through it step-by-step.
Popularity: 7%
Tags: advice, approach anxiety, approach women, approaching women, cock, confidence, Date, dating, Dating Advice, david wygant, dick, how to approach women, how to meet women, how to talk to women, meet women, meeting women, Mindset, penis, self help, Sex, talk to women, talking to women, tips, validation
Posted in Attract and Approach Women, College Dating, High School Dating, Mindset | 8 Comments »
Tuesday, August 10th, 2010
What are your fears? I have a couple of fears. One of them is a huge fear that I’m not going to tell you about now, but will share with you later.
I have something I’m working on right now that is one of my biggest fears, and which is challenging me more that I have ever before been challenged. It is something I work on every single day, and something I kick myself in the ass about every single day.
So let’s talk about fears today. Let’s find out how to overcome any fear — whether it’s approach anxiety, fear of commitment, fear of having children or whatever it might be.
Everyone is in a different place in their life. Everyone has different fears.
I remember when I used to have a fear of flying. I was terrified to fly. It was one of my worst nightmares.
I always thought the plane was going to crash. I thought that turbulence meant that the plane was about to fall apart. During much of my 20′s I didn’t even travel, because I thought I was going to die in a plane crash.
Now I am addicted to traveling. How did that shift take place?
I started traveling. I started getting on airplanes. I started relaxing. I started listening to good music. I started thinking positive thoughts.
When I got on an airplane, I would meditate. It became my quiet time.
Now I actually find being on an airplane to be one of the most meditative things I can do. Granted, the seats hurt my ass really badly. My brain, however, really just loves to zone out on a plane and relax. It’s one of my top ten favorite things to do.
So how do you get over a fear that you have? You think positive things. You envision the outcome.
If you have a fear of approaching women, then envision what it feels like to be able to approach any woman you want. If you have a fear of having kids, then visualize how amazing it’s going to be to hold your son or daughter for the first time. If you have a fear of commitment, visualize how incredible it will be to get really deep with somebody.
It’s all about visualizing my friends. Visualize all the beauty of what it’s going to feel like to get there (wherever the “there” is relative to your fear). Then when you’re on the journey to get there, you will hold on to the beauty of that vision the entire trip.
I talk more deeply and in detail about how I overcame all my own fears. Click to find out how to get rid of approach anxiety and any other fears today.
Popularity: 5%
Tags: advice, approach anxiety, Date, dating, Dating Advice, david wygant, fears, how to get rid of fears, how to overcome fears, overcoming fears, tips
Posted in Goals & Aspirations, Mindset | 13 Comments »
Monday, August 9th, 2010
You know, it’s amazing. It’s one of these beautiful summer nights in Southern California when the Santa Ana winds are blowing in.
I was talking to one of my neighbors, and we were actually looking up at the stars. As he and I were there together outside, we both realized that on that beautiful night we should have been standing out there with our significant others.
I mean, it was absolutely a gorgeous night. There were so many stars showing.
Couples are always looking for ways to break the routine. You come home from work, eat dinner and put on the television.
You don’t take advantage of the beautiful nights. Now that summer is here, the nights are warmer and more fun.
So one of the best things to do a warm night of the year is to stargaze and take the dog for a long walk. Feel the night air. Smell the difference in the summer air.
Fall is right around the corner and you need to get out of the AC and really enjoy the hot hot summer nights!
If you don’t start doing things like this, it’s just going to be another night laying next to each other wondering why you aren’t have sex. The reason you’re not having sex is because you don’t take time time together to have nights like those.
So try this. Believe me you will see your sex life change dramatically.
Popularity: 4%
Tags: advice, better sex, Date, dating, david wygant, how to have better sex, relationship advice, Relationships, Sex, tips
Posted in Love, Marriage, Relationships | 2 Comments »
Monday, August 9th, 2010
You guys have been asking me to come out with a diet and exercise plan. So I wanted to tell you all about what I call “The Dating Diet.” More about that in just a minute.
I’ve been working out my entire adult life, and I want to share a funny — but true — story with you about how I started working out. It’s going to sound goofy to a lot of you.
There was actually one movie that pushed me to want to start working out. It wasn’t Rocky. It wasn’t Dirty Dancing.
It was the movie Flashdance. Yes, I actually went to see the movie Flashdance when it came out.
I watched all the dancing scenes, noticed the way the bodies were totally toned and ripped, and it motivated me in a very bizarre way. Maybe it was all the booze I drank in college, but I remember arriving home after seeing that movie and suddenly started to pound the weights.
I haven’t stopped since. Give or take about five pounds, I’ve basically been the same weight my entire adult life.
I consistently work out. I do cardio four days a week. I lift weights three days a week.
I used to do yoga before I blew out my back. I have now found that being tighter actually keeps me together better.
A lot of people have trouble starting to work out. You gain five or ten (or twenty or thirty) pounds, and you look at yourself in the mirror not liking the way you look.
What a lot of people do in that situation is to head straight for the microwave and eat even more. Others will sit on the couch and say, “I’m going to start exercising next week.”
Here is the truth. If you don’t like the way you look and if you can’t embrace your own body, then nobody you date will either. That is why I call this “The Dating Diet,” because it is all about you feeling great about yourself and your body when you’re dating.
There’s nothing that turned me off more when I was dating, than when a woman insisted on making the room completely dark the first time she got naked with me. I would be looking forward to seeing her naked body, and all she wanted to do was leave the room completely dark because she felt insecure about her body.
How you feel about yourself is so important. So if you feel you’ve been slacking, you need to push yourself.
Start going to the gym, and do just 20 minutes of cardio in the beginning. Then the next week, move up to 25 minutes of cardio, and increase to 30 minutes of cardio the week after that.
Just get started. Whatever you choose to do, start slow and build up.
If you’re not feeling great about yourself and feel uncomfortable at the gym at first, then pick a time to go when there are fewer people there until you feel more comfortable.
Write down all of your excuses. “It’s too cold right now to go to the gym.” “I’m too comfortable on this sofa, and don’t want to miss my favorite shows.” “I didn’t get up early enough today.”
Write down your excuses, and realize that all of them are just that — excuses. You must be dedicated.
Now I’m going to ask you to do something that will really be a challenge for a lot of you, but I want to push you a little bit. Stop reading this blog, go to the bathroom, get undressed and look at yourself from all angles in the bathroom mirror.
What do you like about your body? What do you dislike about your body? What you change about your body? What do you need to accept about your body?
If there are parts of your body you don’t like that you can change through diet and exercise, it’s time to commit to work toward getting those body parts to look how you will love them. If there are other parts of your body that you don’t like that weights and cardio won’t change, then it’s really important to embrace and love who you are.
Popularity: 4%
Tags: advice, Date, dating, dating diet, david wygant, diet, excerise, Flashdance, tips, working out, workout
Posted in Goals & Aspirations, Life Style 101, Mindset | 8 Comments »
Saturday, August 7th, 2010
I met with Coach Jacob on the phone the other day. Jacob is one of my lead coaches and an unbelievable Bootcamp instructor.
He’s a little version of me . . . literally. I’m 6’2″ and he’s 5’7″. He’s almost like my adopted son. He’s an amazing, loving and honest person, but like any child he can also drive me crazy.
One way that Jacob drives me crazy is that he doesn’t understand what following up is. Follow-up is the key to life.
Now Jacob knows how to follow up with women, but sometimes when I give him work tasks he will follow up on his own schedule. He’s fine with me writing this blog, by the way, because he’s always contributing – in the blog, being there for all you guys, and he is always about self-growth. He will always admit both his strong points and his weak points.
Follow-up is the key to anybody being very successful in life. This is not just about dating either.
Granted, if you get a phone number from a woman you need to follow up with her. If you’re the least bit interested, you should follow up right away. I always say that you should give someone a call within 24 hours.
Call them (or call them back) and rephrase something you talked about with them that interested you. That way the conversation feels like a never-ending conversation. Things will flow really easily.
A lot of guys will get a phone number and they’ll wait two weeks to call that woman. Then when they do call, the woman will wonder why it took him so long to call. Even if you say that you were traveling or give some other reason, the woman will no longer be interested.
By not calling for two weeks, you just look like another ass. You look like a guy who is playing games and didn’t make her a priority.
Every woman wants to feel like a priority. I don’t care if it’s the first time you go out with her or the hundredth time you go out with her, every woman wants to feel special.
Follow-up is the key in dating and in every other part of life. If you are in sales and you get a sales lead on which you don’t follow up right away, you are never going to make that sale.
Someone calls you at your office and it takes you four days to follow up with them. In this day and age, there are so many different ways to communicate – you have emails, texts, and cell phones. So you don’t even have to be home or at your office to send someone a message.
If you can’t call someone right away, how hard is it to just send somebody a quick email saying “I’m busy for the next day or two, but I really look forward to speaking with you after that. Have a great few days!”
It’s all about following up. All successful people understand that follow-up is one of the things that made them successful.
You want to be successful at dating? Â You better learn how to follow up. Â If you want to be successful in business, you better really learn how to follow up.
So many people put things off. Those are the people who wake up every New Year’s Day wondering why they aren’t making enough money or aren’t successful in their dating life. They are the ones who write down the same New Year’s resolutions year after year.
If you really want to succeed with life — with women, in business, or in anything else — you need to learn to follow up. If you’re poor at following up, put a “to do” list together every single day. As you do each thing on the list, cross it out.
At the end of the day, look at your “to do” list and transfer all the items that aren’t scratched out on a new piece of paper as your next day’s “to do” list. Every time that you think of something you need to do, write it down right away so you don’t forget.
Say you’re busy doing three or four things and all of a sudden you remember that you need to call Joe. Since you are in the middle of another task, just write down “Call Joe” on your list and that way you will remember to do it after you’re finished.
Another reason to make this list for yourself each day, is that writing everything down gives you a way to prioritize. You can put older tasks on the top and newer ones on the bottom, or maybe you put the most important things on the top of the list. The important thing is that you re-look at your “to do” list every single day.
When I was dating a lot, I would write down every woman that I met. I would write down what they were about, who they were and when I called them (or was going to call them).
I would write all that down automatically — “Met Jane at Whole Foods. Call her Tuesday.” Then I would write things I learned about them like, “Called Jane and met her yesterday. She was cool, liked ….”
I would do this because I know in life we get really busy, and then all of a sudden you’ve forgotten to call a great woman because time got away from you. If you do call her after three or four days have gone by, she’s going to look at it as you being rude.
So get a yellow pad, start writing things down and get that “to do” list together! Review your “to do” list several times a day, and make sure you remain focused and on track.
All of you can thank Coach Jacob for this great blog. I wrote it, but he made me feel it.
Click here to listen to me talk all about my personal tricks to how to become successful in every part of your life — and how to create a roadmap on how to get there.
Popularity: 6%
Tags: advice, call a woman, call women, Conversation, Date, dating, Dating Advice, david wygant, email, follow up, how to be successful, how to get rich, Mindset, self growth, self help, success, Text, tips, when to call a woman, whole foods
Posted in Goals & Aspirations, Mindset, Money & Success | 17 Comments »
Thursday, August 5th, 2010
Not too long ago in the blog, we talked about guys who act like an ass in the bar. For any of you who didn’t catch that other blog, I talked about how to deal with the annoying guy (who we’ll call “Mr. Attitude”) who comes and starts talking to a woman you’re talking to in the bar — particularly the guys who try to get the woman to walk away with them.
In that blog, I gave some advice on how to handle that situation, including leaving the decision of whether to stay talking to you or to leave with Mr. Annoying up to her. A few days after I posted that blog, I got an email from a guy who told me he had tried what I said and that it had worked! This guy said what I recommended in that blog, and (not surprisingly) the woman chose to stay with him instead of leaving with Mr. Annoying.
This guy was not just writing to let me know how well this technique worked though. His email went on to say that after the woman rejected Mr. Annoying, he started to try to pick a fight with this guy right there in the bar.
Here’s a guy who just can’t handle that someone else talked to the girl to whom he wanted to be talking. So what do you do in that situation? Here’s exactly what you do.
You take the girl by the hand, look at her and say, “Let’s go sit down over there with some of my friends. I want to introduce you to my crew.” Then you take her by the hand and sit down with your friends, or grab a table if you’re not there with friends.
In other words, you walk away. Mr. Annoying is a bully. You walk away from bullies.
Mr. Annoying is so sexually frustrated in his life, that all he wants to do is fight. Bullies like that are so pissed off that they don’t get what they want, that they go out at night with aggression and ready to fight. So you walk away.
There is power in walking away, because real men will walk away from Mr. Annoying. Less powerful men will challenge Mr. Annoying. They will engage with him.
A powerful man doesn’t do this. You are not only being a powerful man when you do this, but you are also showing that woman that you are a powerful man who has restraint as part of your personality.
That woman is going to admire the fact that you don’t have a temper. Women don’t want to be with a guy like that, because it reminds her of so many other guys she has known in the past.
Men are very testosterone-laden and women don’t want to see that crazy hot-tempered side of you. Women want men who are very even-keeled and can handle all situations.
Do that, and she’s going to look at you as someone with strength. It’s actually probably going to turn her on. The fact that you walked away from the idiot will turn her on, because a lot of guys would have just gone ahead and engaged with him (and maybe even got into a fight with him).
Let me tell you something, if you get into that fight with Mr. Annoying then neither of you would end up with that woman. Both of you would have gone home alone.
The lesson here guys? Walk away.
Click Here to read how to be a powerful man and handle any situation in a way that will set you apart from all the other guys and will attract women to you even more.
Popularity: 7%
Tags: advice, attract women, attracting women, Date, dating, david wygant, how to attract women, how to be a better communicator, how to handle conflict, how to meet women, meet women, meeting women, meeting women in bars, tips, understanding women, when to walk away
Posted in College Dating, How To Be A Better Communicator, Life Style 101, Night Game, Understanding Female Psychology & Mindset | 13 Comments »
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