Yourself.

How can somebody love you if you don’t love yourself? How can someone respect you if you don’t respect yourself?

You need to be in love with yourself. I like to call it “masturbation of your soul.” You have to fall in love with yourself first.

When you go out and do things everyday to meet women or men, you’re going out each day really enjoying yourself and loving yourself. You love what you do and love the moment so that you can create the energy within yourself to attract other people.

I love myself! I really do. Sure, there are things that I don’t like about myself – but I embrace those things, and I work on them. Overall, I’m totally in love with myself!

There are always going to be things that you don’t like about yourself. But first you have to accept that they exist. Once you accept those parts of you that you wish were gone, you’ll begin to accept yourself as a whole and love yourself entirely.

At this point, you can work on yourself from a much better place. Rather than being so critical and self-judgmental, you can really embrace yourself and who you are and learn from the lessons in your life. You can learn to embrace the whole beauty of what your life is.

I have a great new product for men and women that goes deep into the importance of self love. A must for anyone who wants and desires to attract that special person in their lives.

Check it out here for men and check it our here for women.

Have you ever spent twenty-eight hours with somebody and it felt like one minute? Twenty-eight hours in which the conversation never ceased to stop? Twenty-eight hours in which the excitement kept building and where the connection kept getting stronger as each minute passed?

Life is a gift. It’s time all of you started accepting the gift of life, because when you do what will happen is that you will actually start to meet people who are going to blow you away. When you’re open and you’re being honest, that is when you’re going to find someone who is also open and honest and then life is just going to seem to mesh.

You will be on the same page with this person about everything you think and feel. It’s amazing when you spend twenty-eight hours with somebody, and when they leave all you want to do is start another twenty-eight hours with them all over again. You don’t want that person to leave. You just want them to stay.

Of course we all have responsibilities in our lives. We all need to work. We all have things we need to do. We need to make money. We need to see our friends. We need to see our family. When someone leaves you after spending twenty-eight hours together and all you can think about is getting to spend twenty-nine (or even thirty-six) hours with them the next time you see them, however, you are in the midst of something amazing.

It’s about building. It’s about desire. It’s about experiencing someone so much that when they leave, you think about how amazing your time together was and look forward to more. That is what chemistry is all about.

Chemistry is about connecting with somebody on every level, and having a very peaceful feeling as you connect with them. It’s is knowing that whatever you say is safe. It is knowing that whatever you’re feeling, they are on the same page with you.

Every word that is said and every moment that is exchanged is building a memory. It’s building things the two of you can talk about in the future. It is the foundation of a relationship.

The first few months you are hanging with someone is building the foundation for what you hope will be an amazing relationship for a long time. So for those of you who are dating someone new, enjoy every moment and every memory because those memories and moments are precious.

There will be a time when you will no longer see that person for twenty-eight hours and will see them all the time. You’ll be so entwined in each other’s lives, and you’ll get there naturally. You’ll get there because each twenty-eight hour period is building the desire to spend more time with each other, to get to know each other better, and to experience more and more of each other.

Connecting with another soul on a deep level like this is amazing and is the best feeling you could ever have, because it’s a connection with no thought process that is 100% natural. That feeling is something that is really going to last and which will really build into more intense feelings.

I think the greatest thing you can have in life is being so content with yourself and so happy, that you are able to truly think about someone else and how you feel about them. I must admit that it’s addicting, and it’s an addiction that everyone needs to feel.

What are your thoughts on this? Are you dating someone about whom you feel this way? If you are dating someone and you don’t have this feeling about them, then you need to move on because this feeling is one that we all need to experience.

There is no other feeling you should experience with someone, because if you’re not feeling this way it means that you’re not connecting with that person on enough of a deep and soulful level. It’s all right if you discover you’re not with someone for whom you feel this way, because you can feel confident that if you move on that there is someone out there waiting for you with whom you will experience this feeling.

If you believe that this type of connection with someone is possible, it will show up. When it does, you need to embrace it because that person could be the love of your life. You’ve got to embrace every little moment of it, because the more you do the better it becomes.

I listened to it the other day when I was driving around. It’s about a guy who is basically bored in his relationship and puts out a personal ad. His ad says, “do you like piña coladas, getting caught in the rain? If you’re not into health food and like the taste of champagne,” or something like that. “Do you like making love at midnight…” blah blah blah… whatever might be.

But what is really funny about it is that the internet is just full of personal ads. We’re all searching for somebody that fits our personal ad. Have you gone to match.com, or Yahoo personals, or any of the other websites, and read what the opposite sex is looking for?

This is great research. If you want to learn about the opposite sex, and learn about what is important to them, just sign up for a dating site for three days. Search the opposite sex’s ads – forget about the pictures. Don’t even look at the pictures. This isn’t Maxim magazine or Cosmo – just read the profiles. Read what people say in their profiles. Look at what they are talking about.

You can learn so much about the opposite sex by reading profiles. Spend an hour or two every single night reading profiles. Read about what people say about themselves, and read about what they are looking for. Read everything.

This way you will learn about the opposite sex, and you will learn what they are looking for. You will also start to understand them more. A lot of the problem is that men and women don’t understand each other; and they don’t do enough research to begin to even begin to understand one another.

So do some research. Instead of trying to meet the opposite sex – research the opposite sex!

Recently I told a client that he needed to learn women. Go to a coffee shop, bring a newspaper, and sit down next to two women chatting. Learn how to speak woman-talk. If you want to learn about men, sit down next to two men at a café and listen to them talk to each other.

Listen to the opposite sex interacting with each other. Then you can learn how to communicate better with the opposite sex.

Worst-case scenario: you can always post a personal ad titled “Do you like piña coladas!”

Todays Video is all about drinking that Pina Colada and heading to the beach. A live in field breakdown of beach hook ups.

Have a great Sunday!!!

I have wanted to write this blog for so long, I really have. And I know that each of you is going to either completely agree with me on this or totally disagree. And those of you that disagree with me are going to be so pissed – I can feel it already! As you’re reading this you’re wondering why you are going to be pissed at me, and I’ll tell you why in a second.

I’m about to tell you something that is just going to blow you away:

Soulmates are bullshit.

Here’s the thing – before you get your panties in a knot – let’s say you live in Seattle, and your soulmate lives in Rome. And you have a fear of flying. You’ll spend the rest of your life never finding your soulmate.

Let’s say you live in New York, and your “soulmate” lives in Florida. The problem is that your Jewish grandparents tortured you as a child by taking you to Florida way too many times and you never want to set foot in that state again. So you only vacation now in the Caribbean.

If you believe that there is one soulmate for you out there in the world, then you’d better start traveling to find that person!

But if you’re like me – and you believe that you can have soul connections with people, then you are far more evolved than the person who believes there is one perfect partner for everyone.

I don’t believe that there is one person for everybody, and I never have. (That’s not entirely true, I’ll take that back – my mother tortured me with the whole soulmate idea for a long time and throughout my life I thought I had found mine – I thought Ellen was my soulmate, I thought Karen was my soulmate, then Jessica, then Sonya…)

I never thought of Alison (my recent girlfriend) as my soulmate, I thought of her as an equal. That is probably the reason why that relationship was the best I’ve ever had.

I’ve had women tell me – some even recently – that they thought we were soulmates. I looked at them and said, “we might have a soul connection, but we’re not soulmates.”

I believe that your soul is meant to mate with many different people. You can have soul connections – I think Daphne and I have a soul connection. Wherever I go, that dog follows. The minute I met Daphne – she looked at me and she stuck by my side like glue. That’s a soul connection.

If you want to go even deeper into lala-ville (because I do live in Los Angeles) I do believe in past lives and everything else, and I do believe that souls can come back and find each other. I believe that friends will come back and find each other as different things. I could have been a little girl in another life.

If you’ve ever seen the movie Defending Your Life with Albert Brooks – which is one of the funniest movies ever – there is this scene where this big chunky guy is doing past life regression and sees himself licking a lollipop and jumping around like a little girl. It was the funniest scene in the entire world – he absolutely freaked out.

But I do believe that souls come back. There are certain people that you meet – male or female – that you know you are going to be friends with them instantly. It’s your souls connecting with each other.

There are women that I’ve dated that I’ve had instant soul connections with. Some of those connections were more lustful than others, and some were just on a friendship level.

So I do believe that you can have soul connections. If there was one person in the world for you, and you screw up that relationship by the time you are 30, does that mean you have to spend the rest of your life alone? Absolutely not.

I could move to Russia tomorrow – not speaking any of the language – and find soul connections with some of the most amazing women. I bet I could make some great friends. But I’ll never drink the vodka because I’m just not a drinker!

But your soulmate is a farce. It’s bullshit. You can have lots of soulmates and many soul connections, but there is not just one person for you. If there were, there would be a ton of people running around the world accumulating many more frequent flier miles trying to find their soulmate.

Here’s another interesting tidbit for all of you: in different parts of your life, you’ll have different soul connections. You are ready for different types of relationships at different periods of your life.

So you might have had an intense soul connection – or you might have thought someone was your soulmate – but maybe you weren’t ready for that relationship.

Right now, I’m ready to meet my bootymates!

That’s a new term that nobody uses – do you know what a bootymate is? It’s an incredible sexual connection with somebody who doesn’t aggravate you at all. All you do is have amazing sex and you feel like your bodies were made for each other. You feel like your bodies know each other. But you don’t have the aggravation of maintaining a relationship.

You don’t have to say “I love you” – hell, you don’t even have to say, “I like you!” All you have to do is respect each other’s bodies and respect each other’s space. Respect everything. And know that when you get together, your souls are going to connect because you and she are bootymates!

Craig: The concept of soulmate came from Greek mythology. Back then, people believed that once upon a time everyone had two heads, four arms, and four legs – but just one soul.

Then the gods threw down lightning bolts and split everybody in half, so now each person had one head, two arms, and two legs – but only half of a soul. You were supposed to spend the rest of your life looking for the other half of your soul.

The problem with this is, just as David said, what if in this huge world, your soulmate lives far away? You might never find them. Or worse yet, what if your soulmate lives in your city and you were having a really shitty day on the day that you first met them? Now you’re still doomed to live the rest of your life alone.

I’m convinced that we meet a potential “soulmate” once or twice a month, but we’re not ready to meet them yet and they just pass us by. I’m convinced that serendipity plays a much bigger role in us finding somebody that is right for us. There are just groups of people out there that are right for each of us, and we end up finding one of those people only when we are ready for it.

David: That’s really interesting, I agree with you. It’s so true it’s unbelievable. I’m going to requote you on that: we probably do run into our soulmate at so many different times over the course of a month – except we’re not aware of it, or we’re not ready, or we’re not open for it.

They make a left, you make a right, but you were supposed to meet in the middle. Or you’re in the market and you get a Blackberry text message. As you look down, your soulmate walks right by you. It’s very interesting. I don’t think we spend enough time out there engaging everybody.

I think that if you really follow the stuff that I talk about in the Mastery Series, in the bootcamps, and everything else – you could probably find a soulmate once a week. You would be so much more in tune with your environment and with who you are as a person – you would know yourself inside and out. You’d be so open to things that you would connect with people just like yourself.

This weekend was really interesting. I was telling one of the guys (Allan actually) that he’s going to date exactly who he is right now – shy, quiet, very sweet, very nice, great personality. He’s going to meet a woman who has the same type of qualities yet wants to become a little bit more outgoing. Together they are going to really connect. He’ll make a great husband.

But he has to find enough courage to go out there, open his eyes, and start talking to them. That’s what it takes: courage. People don’t have the courage to talk to each other.

Do you realize that is the biggest fear that most people have: that they don’t have enough courage to go up and talk to people? Yet if they could just walk up to someone and say, “man, I really wanted to come over and talk to you, what’s your name?” the other person would be so receptive, because they feel the same exact way!

Usually people are attracted to people who share the same characteristics that they have. Guys will wish that they could date certain women – every guy wants to date the Maxim magazine model – but they won’t. And they know that.

So that’s an interesting topic, and an interesting thought – and it’s 100% true.

Todays video is a lesson on how to attract large groups by being entertaining. This is not what you think.

What does love mean to you? What is the definition of love? What do you feel like when you’re in love? What I’m really asking here is what is real love?

You know, it’s funny. Love has so many different angles, different sides and different feelings attached to it. There are also different kinds of love. There is romantic love and there is fantasy love.

To me, love is finding somebody with whom you just connect and with whom you are at total peace in every single way. Being at peace with someone in every single way happens in all different little ways.

It is holding hands with them as you walk down the street while still keeping your full identity.

It is sitting next to them on the airplane looking at them and watching them laugh, and realizing that their laughter really makes you smile.

It is watching them fall asleep and enjoying how they look curled up in a little ball on the bed all comfortable and warm.

It means protecting them when things aren’t good.

It is loving how their eyes light up when you do special things for them, like buying them a pair of earrings at a farmer’s market.

Love is about sharing yourself and about giving yourself freely to someone. Love is about really embracing the gift that somebody gives you.

Sometimes we’re not ready for that gift of love. Sometimes we’re not capable of giving back.

The moment you realize you love somebody, is the moment when you feel peace when you look at them and when you see yourself in them. It’s really nice to get to know somebody in every way and respect them.

There is no “one perfect person” in this world for anybody. There is no perfect relationship out there.

So if you find someone to whom you can truly relate, someone who really makes your heart go “thump thump,” and someone whom you think is the most beautiful person in the world to you every time you see them walk into a room, then that is the person with whom you should be spending the rest of your time. That is the person with whom you need to build a life.

Love has its ups and downs. Sometimes love may falter and then come back even stronger. Sometimes love loses faith in order to regain it stronger down the road.

What love is entirely without is judgment. You will never judge your lover for a journey they needed to take. You will never judge your lover for things that they need to do.

You just embrace your lover. You will always listen to your lover, because to truly love somebody is to understand where they’re at in their life, what they need to do, and how they need certain experiences.

When you find someone you truly love, things may not go in textbook order or work out according to plan. It may not work out at all for a period of time. If you realize you love someone, though, you better do everything in your power to make sure you never lose that person.

There is nothing worse than seeing someone you love walking down the street arm-in-arm with somebody else, and realizing that you lost that person because you let your ego or your stubbornness get in the way. That thought alone will drive you crazy forever and ever.

When you love somebody, you better embrace them before you lose them. What eventually happens in life if you someone and you’re not with them, is that they will find someone else to love them. So you better take hold of that love before it’s too late.

I thought I’d go a different route with all of you today, because the definition of love means so many different things to different people. So now I want to hear from you. What’s your definition of love? How do you feel when you’re in love? What type of love do you want to experience?