Are you a twitter junkie?

Do you read short words and statements from people you do not even know?

Are you so obsessed with Twitter that you are on your smart phone tweeting away all day?

Have you even been called a Twit for tweeting to much?

Instead of actually doing face to face time with friends, you spend your face time on your i phone or android phone tweetering.

Anyway you get my point.

Check out today’s video to see if you can pass the Twitter test.

So I took her to the beach for a walk, and learned quickly that apparently Daphne had a belly ache. After she did her business, I put her back in the house and went out to run an errand.

When I returned I didn’t see anything out of the ordinary . . . at first. I went upstairs, checked my email and did a few things. Then I went downstairs and there was that “brown smell” on my white rug.

I have hard wood floors throughout my entire place with the exception of one small white rug. So why did she choose THAT spot? Did it resemble the beach to her? I mean, she lays on that rug all the time. It doesn’t make any sense.

Why when a dog has the runs or needs to vomit, do they seem to feel the need to find the most expensive rug you have on which to do it? It just goes to show you how wrong people are when they try and convince you how intelligent dogs are, cause if they were they would shit on the hardwood floor AND clean up after themselves.

Now onto a completely “non-shitty” topic. Do you know the 80/20 rule? In life, 20% of the people make all of the money, and the other 80% complain about not having it.

The old 80/20 rule really applies to your social life too. Think about it: 20% of the people that you meet are interesting, and the other 80% are boring as hell. You just don’t give a bleep about them.

Yet it seems like everyone still really wants to connect with 100% of the people that they meet. But you have to keep in mind that 80% of the people you meet you’re just not going to connect with.

So really, why do you give a fuck? There’s no reason to give a fuck. None. So just don’t!

That 80/20 rule works with pretty much everything in life!

What is up with hotel beds? Can they be any more torturous?

I mean, you look forward to vacations more than anything, but yet when you come back you feel as stiff as the concrete in New York City. Do you think the people who work in hotels ever actually sleep in them?

So after I returned from New York, I had to go to the chiropractor for some snap, crackle and pop . . . which also makes no sense to me. If my body was out of place before I went there, how does it know when it’s in place? You guys can help me figure that out.

Now onto today’s topic.

So many of you have trouble remembering names, so when you start talking to someone you spend the whole time trying to remember their name instead of actually listening to what the person is saying.

The solution to this ongoing difficulty remembering names is often to refer to almost everyone as either “Yo” or “Hey Man.” The way this works is that when you see someone you know, but can’t remember their name, you can just refer to them as “Yo” or Hey Man.”

For instance, you see one of these people in a coffee shop. Even though you couldn’t remember that person’s name if your life depended on it, you can walk right up to them and say “Hey man! How have you been?”

Maybe you’re just walking down the street and you see someone you know but whose name is totally unknown to you. You can call out to them by saying “Yo!” Inevitably, that person (and probably five or six other people in their vicinity) will turn around.

Almost everyone responds to “Yo!” or “Hey Man!” You probably do too. So virtually everyone is “Yo” or “Hey Man.” So when you see another “Yo” or “Hey Man” the conversation will go something like this:

David: “Yo, what’s up?”
Yo: “Hey Man, good to see you!”

It’s true. Think about it. Whenever someone yells “Yo,” you turn around every time.

It’s just like in a relationship how all women are “Baby” or “Honey.” So you can go anywhere and call out “Honey!” and every woman will turn around.

So technically you can be at a party and have everyone introduce each other without ever knowing anyone’s name. “Hey Man, this is Honey.” Then she can say “Yo, it’s nice to meet you!”

Of course, this whole thing doesn’t really translate well to a woman to woman interaction. I mean, what are the women’s equivalents of “Yo” and “Hey Man?” “Hey Sweetie?” “Hey Woman?” Really, unless one of the women is wearing a wifebeater with beer and mustard stains on it, I don’t think calling out “Hey Woman!” is going to really work very well.

So as you can see, although “Yo” and “Hey Man” seem to solve the whole name remembering problem, there are still some complications. How do you tell the 400 “Yo’s” and the 300 “Hey Man’s” apart in your BlackBerry directory? I guess you could try to write something distinguishing about them in the “company” line of their contact page, but what do you do when one of them calls?

You must be VERY good at voice recognition to be able to know which “Hey Man” is calling. At least you know you can answer the phone “Hey Man, How are ya?” (at least until you figure out which one is on the phone).

Actually some of my best friends are named “Hey Man,” and I have a lot of “Yo’s” in my life. The great thing is that I have only one “Baby” . . . unless there’s some I don’t know about.

House-hunting is a great way to meet people. First of all, many single women buy houses. Secondly, many women like to decorate so they go house-hunting to get ideas for décor. When you go to an open house you will always find lots of women hanging around.

And we did. We walked towards the open house, and there was a woman on her way out. How did I open her? “Hey, how was it?”

She started telling me, and we were talking, and I began to ask her questions like, “so how long have you been looking for a house?” I was trying to find things out about her. And you could see her attraction starting to build as I lead the conversation.

And then we walked into the house. I’ve been looking for a new house for about a year, and the realtor looked really familiar. I asked him, “hey man, you seem really familiar, where was it that we’ve met?” He responded, “oh yeah, it was Granville.”

I don’t really remember it being Granville, so I played along for a bit, and then I did remember him. So we talked a little bit more.

And David, one of my clients, was wondering, oh man, why are we wasting time talking to this dude? The reason that you talk to the dude is this: you are building up your social network.

The biggest mistake that men make in situations like open houses and bars is that they just wait to talk to the hot woman. They have the opportunity to chat with this guy, and they don’t take it.

And then, a week later, they run into this guy again, and he’s out with three hot women. You could walk right up to him and say, “hey man, did that condo ever sell?” And then you are introduced to the women as a friend – as a safe person that has already been screened. You don’t have to worry about an opener or finding the right thing to say, because you’re being introduced!

That is the reason why I spent ten minutes talking to the realtor and not just waiting to speak to women that I’m attracted to. I now have a friend. You could see the way he responded to me.

Always give out your business card as well. Always give it to the brokers, and everyone. Why would you want to hand out business cards to brokers and other men? Because, once again, you are building your social network.

You are there, talking to someone, and you hand him your card. Later, the guy calls you to ask if you’re still looking for property and you tell him you’re not quite sure. Then he says, “look, I’m having a get-together at my house and a few other people will be there…” This is also a great way to get invited to parties!

You have to start thinking outside of the box, particularly if you’re playing for keeps – if you want to go out and meet spectacular people. If you just want to continue to meet average people, sure, keep going to the bars. But if you want to meet spectacular people, you have to think outside the box.

Todays video goes over the importance of this blog in greater detail.

Also check out this link as well. You can create this life by clicking here.

I don’t know what you all think of MySpace or Facebook, but in my opinion, social networking sites are borderline weird – especially if you’re like me and have dated somebody who basically lived for them.

Earlier this year, I was actually dating a Facebook/MySpace junkie. So today, Rey was on the computer when he started laughing really loudly. When I asked him what was up, he told me that I had been removed from her friend list.

I was removed from both her MySpace and Facebook friend lists. Is this elementary school? Have I been banned from the tree house? Have I been eliminated?

Do you remember that tree house when you were a kid? The one that you weren’t allowed to enter because you weren’t cool enough or something?

So I’m no longer on her Facebook or MySpace page. Is that supposed to hurt me? I moved on the day she left! I couldn’t wait for the relationship to end – because it just wasn’t right.

So now she’s punishing me? By taking me off of her MySpace and Facebook pages? Really, are we in kindergarten? “You can’t have this piece of gum because I don’t like you anymore!”

How many of you eliminate people from your life and then subsequently eliminate them from your MySpace and Facebook pages as well?

Is that supposed to be the final slap? So we can’t play anymore online. She can’t tag me or bite me. She can’t poke me anymore?

That’s quite all right – because we’re done ‘poking’ in reality as well! I don’t need to be poked in fantasyland. We already poked in real life and it didn’t work out, and now the relationship is over. I don’t need to be poked on Facebook.

It’s the same way that I feel about strip clubs. Why go and get someone to grind on you when it’s totally fake?

I’m all about reality – not fantasy. So for those of you who play around on MySpace and Facebook – I’m talking about poking, rearranging your top five friends like they’ve earned a promotion – stop!

I remember when I was hanging out with this girl – she used to rearrange her top five friends on MySpace depending on the mood she was in that day.

Seriously. This isn’t elementary school, and it’s not a popularity contest – oh wait, it’s the internet, I forgot that it is a popularity contest!

A lot of guys just hang with the same guys every weekend. You’ve seen these mantourages cruise the bars every Friday and Saturday night – usually there’s a group of guys consistently drinking as if drinking were a sport!

They actually plan out their meals – “hey dude, we’ve got to eat pizza at 7:00, start drinking at 8:30, and you don’t want to have that extra slice because the alcohol will kick in faster!”

Living in California, there are lots of mantourages running around. If you’ve ever gone down to Manhattan Beach, there’s mantourages on the beach – they’re usually the group of guys with the keg, hanging out all day long like they are 20 years old again!

But they’re not. Then they go back to their group house that they share in their thirties, and they sit down on the lawn furniture that decorates their living room – they thought that was cool!

So what do women do? Well, women join chickourages!

You know the woman: she’s out with her friends and out comes the digital camera at every moment? “Here it comes… the digital camera!” You never see guys walk around all the time with their digital cameras, saying, “hey, Joe, why don’t you and Jimmy get together right now and we’ll take a picture! This is a great picture moment!”

But women are whipping out that camera non-stop. Everywhere they go. Judy tries on a new dress and here comes the camera. Out for margaritas? Here comes the camera. Out with a group of friends at a bachelorette party? Here comes the camera!

Look at this! We’re in the airport, on the way to Mexico – here comes the camera. On the airplane, when the stewardess spills something – here comes the camera.

That camera comes out everywhere. Women have become documentary filmmakers. They shoot their entire lives. You have to look at every single picture that they have. It’s amazing – every single time, the camera comes out.

Judy tries on a new bathing suit? Out comes the camera. There they are on the beach in Mexico – out comes the camera.

And the funny thing about it is that every woman that you see on either Myspace or Facebook seems like a chronic alcoholic! Every single picture has alcohol in it. Yet these women will write on profiles on dating sites: drink? Hardly ever.

But still there are 75 pictures of them sucking down alcohol. It seems like either they are lying or they really are chronic alcoholics!

But it’s funny with these women and their chickourages. If you go to a woman’s Myspace page, it’s like a visual biography of her entire life! “There I am when I was 15 – oops, there’s a drink in my hand.” “There I was at 19 – there’s a drink in my hand.” “Hey, there I was last week,” and there’s still a drink in her hand. You’d think they’d send them to AA instead of Myspace!

Women have to document everything. The funny thing about it that the women actually send you updates: “I updated my Myspace page today.” And you think, wow, that’s so exciting, why don’t I go look at more pictures of you and your friends? I’d rather see you naked, in the flesh, in front of me then see pictures of you with your chickourage!

Todays podcast dives deeper into the real uses of facebook and my space.

Can you date on them or just become popular.

What you are about to hear is something that facebook or my space never wants to admit.
Click here to download…