Falling in love is great. It’s a drug.

Let me tell you something. There is nothing greater than falling in love.

Close your eyes and remember the first time you fell in love. Remember your first love. Remember your high school or college love. Maybe you just recently fell in love with someone. It’s like you’re capturing that essence.

The feeling of love actually is kind of a drug. There are hormones – like Dopamine — which actually are produced in our bodies which give us that feeling.

Anyway, falling in love is such an amazing process. It really is. To look at someone and know absolutely that you love them is amazing.

Here’s something that is interesting about falling in love. Falling in love is really peeling a layer from yourself every single day and giving it to another person.

There is one thing about falling in love, however, about which most people don’t talk. While falling in love with someone is incredible, you should always be falling in love with two people.

The other person with whom you should be falling in love is yourself. Every day, you should be falling more in love with yourself.

You should be doing this whether you are in a relationship or whether you are single. Let’s say you are single right now and you’re searching for someone.

If that is the case, I have but one question for you (and it’s not about how many people you went out and talked to today). My question to you is this: Did you fall more in love with yourself today than you did yesterday?

Every day you should accept yourself more. Every day you should work on yourself. Every day you should realize more who who you are as a person.

Every day you embrace yourself is another day that you’re falling more in love with yourself. This is so important, because the more you fall in love with yourself the more someone else can fall in love with you.

Love is a selfless thing. Opening up and expressing love to somebody is a selfless thing.

Let me show you how this all fits into a relationship with another person. Let’s say you are a mushy person who likes to say “I love you” every five seconds to your partner, and expresses yourself by writing poetry and little Post-It® love notes all over the house.

Then suppose that your partner is someone who is just not a “Post-It® note” kind of person. That person loves you just as deeply, but expresses their love in a different way. The way they express love might be with a smile, in the way they hold your hand, the way they kiss or the way they say “I love you” in the morning.

If you’re a secure person and you’re falling in love with yourself, then you are going to also be a secure person when you fall in love with somebody else. The reason is that you are not going to expect to be treated the exact way you treat your partner (which will never happen). Never in life will you meet someone who is exactly like you in every way.

So think about this. When you are truly in love with yourself, you can truly love another person because you’ll expect absolutely nothing back.

When you’re not truly in love with yourself, you’re always going to be looking for confirmation. You’ll think and/or say things like, “I told you I loved you this morning. Will you tell me you love me tonight? Please do it so we can be even.”

There will be some days when you might say “I love you” to you partner thirty times, and your partner only says it to you once. This shouldn’t matter to you. If you are bursting with love and you are totally secure with yourself, then you should say “I love you” thirty times in a day if you want. If you get it back even one time, then that’s awesome. Appreciate and enjoy it!

If there’s one thing I’ve learned about men, however, it is that when they finally find that one woman with whom they want to be, they want to declare their love to the world.

It’s like they just want to tell everyone. They want to tell anyone who will listen.
They want to get up on a podium and announce, “I met this great girl and I’m in love!”

It’s almost like they’ve never felt that way before. I don’t understand it, but virtually all men seem to act this way.

So I think that a lot of men never fully feel complete until they figure everything out in their life. They want to figure out their whole life. They figure out their work. They figure out their place in the world.  

A lot of guys don’t want to fall in love. 23 year old guys will say things like, “I really want to be with this person, but I’ve got to figure my career out first.”

As a man, I think you need to go through a lot of life lessons and understand yourself.  I’m not saying that women don’t also need to do this, and I’m not excluding women from this discussion. Men, however, just seem like they need to figure everything out before they put the pieces into place.

The thing is, though, that sometimes in life those “pieces” might come into your life before you have figured everything out. When that happens, you still need to embrace them.

It seems like when men finally do find their true love, they love to declare it. It’s like they want their friends to say, “Wow!” They want the confirmation of hearing, “Really, Dude, that’s so great!”

When a lot of guys are in the beginning stages of learning how to meet women, they tend to have a lot of the same conversations. When they sleep with a woman, they’re going to tell their friends “Man, I slept with this hot girl last night!” It’s all about confirmation.

Men are always about confirmation. They’ve always been about confirmation.

Guys will say things like, “Look at that hot babe over there. She really likes me!” That guy says that because he wants his friends to agree that the girl really likes him.

So men are always looking for confirmation when it comes to women, and that doesn’t change when men find love. When a man finds that woman he know he wants to be with for the long haul, he will make a declaration of love . . . to everyone he can find.

Think about it. Men like to blow their friends away (regardless of the what it is). Men first like to impress their friends, and then they want to blow them away.

It’s funny, too, in how many different places now a days you can make such declarations of love. You can go on Facebook and declare your love to someone. I’ve seen almost all my friends do that.

A friend of mine from college declared his love for someone on Facebook. This is a guy who probably slept with half of the women at that University when we were there, and I’ve never seen him declare his love. When I spoke to him recently, though, he declared his love for her to me. I thought he was crazy.

I’ve seen a lot of my friends declare the love, but I’m just not as public about declaring mine. That’s just not me.  It’s not my personality.  Why should I declare love?  I have a relationship that’s amazing, and nobody needs to know. The reason I’ve probably never declared love, though, is because I never truly felt in love until now.

Now, am I going to declare my love to all of you in the blog today? Nah . . . I’m not going to do that. I’m not going to declare my love for the woman I love either. I know how I feel. I will, of course, declare that love to all my friends though!

Men are very funny and very stubborn, but when a men truly falls in love he’ll declare it and shout it from the top of the Empire State Building. So if any of you guys have ever felt this way, I’d like to hear it.

For those of you who think this blog is too sappy, I don’t really care because sometimes nothing feels better than a declaration of love. If you’ve not declared your love for somebody — including yourself — recently, it’s time you started because real love for yourself and for someone else doesn’t happen often. You should be declaring your love every single day.