You tell them that it’s the best sex of your life. She’s nurturing, loving and amazing.

Alright, maybe she loses it once in a while. Maybe when she drinks she has multiple personalities — not just one, but three or four. Maybe she’s just a little rambunctious and a little embarrassing at some of your office parties.

That’s all okay, though, because you wake up every Saturday morning and she does things sexually that no one else has ever done before. She wears skimpy little outfits around the house all the time. If you have a rough day, she completely caters to you.

Then one time you disagree with her and have a little bit of an argument in which you contradict yourself about something. So she decides to sneak into your emails and reads them. When you catch her, she tells you she won’t do it again and that she’ll “be a good girl” from now on. She even uses that terminology to make you feel like you’re the daddy — the man in control — and will say to you in a baby voice “Oh baby, I’ll never snoop again. This is the first time I ever snooped.”

I have heard that from these crazy women. The first time you’ve ever stooped? You’re 32 years old, and you just decided today for the first time that you were going to snoop?

These crazy women will lie. They’re never quite sure where they were during the day when you ask them. They manipulate.

If you don’t have enough sex with them, they will give you a play-by-play report of what they did that afternoon with their vibrator. You think it’s so cool. So you decide that you’re going to break the “man law” and date this woman.

The “man law” is that you have sex with the crazies and marry the great ones. You don’t marry the crazy ones, because that crazy woman is going to turn into the crazy mother of your children one day.

Despite the “man law,” you make the decision to date her because the sex is so addicting. It’s great getting hot text messages in the middle of the day when she decides to masturbate in her office while everyone was there.

You love this stuff. She’s crazy, she’s wild, she’s fun, but she’s insane. It’s probably like marrying Lindsay Lohan. You don’t marry these women though.

So now your best friend has come to you and told you not to do it. Don’t date this woman any more. Let me tell you what to do in this situation.

The crazy ones only get crazier with age. They don’t get more mellow. Your life will be a life of great sex, but emotional instability.

Just wait until she’s pregnant for nine months, and all the hormones are kicking in. Let me tell you, even the sane ones are insane when they’re pregnant. Wait until she feels fat after pregnancy and you make one comment asking her if she is going to lose the weight. See what happens then.

The crazy ones are great to have sex with, but don’t marry them. It’s almost like when you’re playing monopoly. You don’t want that get out of jail free card with the crazy ones, you want to stay in jail.

Enjoy the sex, but think to yourself, “How stable is this woman going to be with the kids? How stable is she going to be once I move my way up the corporate ladder and we actually win the trip to Hawaii? Do I really want my wife to be topless at the company pool? Do I want her hitting on the other women at the office party?”

It might be hot right now that she’s willing to do all these crazy things, including having her best friend over for a three-way. The problem is that if you marry this crazy woman you might lose out on a lot of other things in life — sanity, promotions and stability.

Take some advice from a friend of mine who once married one of these crazy women. You can’t just them — 50% of what you own (and then some) will be in their pocket. Crazy women are irrational, and if you try to divorce them they get even and they’ll take you for everything you’re worth.

Welcome to your life — the one where you need to choose between being with the sexual dynamo who is a crazy woman, and going out to find one who is just a little more mellow and a little more sane.

Now they’ve broken up, and she’s started calling you. She tells you she’s starting to have feelings for you. At the same time, your best friend still talks about her and wonders if he did something wrong.

You’re in love with your best friend’s ex, and she is in love with you. How do you handle this? What do you do in this situation?

I am somebody who truly believes that people are not possessions. If I break up with someone — and I have broken up with a lot of people — I have no problem with any of my friends dating my ex, falling in love with her and even marrying her.

This has, in fact, happened to me. My good friend Charlie is married to a woman I used to date. They started dating three years after I broke up with her, and I was perfectly fine with it.

So, if you have feelings for your best friend’s ex, here is what you need to do: you need to confirm your feelings with her.

Sit down with her and tell her exactly how you feel. You know she feels the same way about you, as you do about her. Have that heart-to-heart talk with her and then ask her, “What do we do about telling my buddy? I don’t want to lose my friendship with him, but yet I don’t want to act on my feelings for you.” Both of you know your friend extremely well, and together you will be able to come up with a way to tell him so that he will not be angry or hurt.

There are a lot of guys out there who truly feel that once they have dated a woman, she is off limits to all of their friends — no matter how long it’s been since they broke up. I think this is the most ridiculous thing in the entire world. We don’t own people; we just share our time with them.

Once you’ve had a conversation with your best friend’s ex, you’ll need to sit down with your friend, and do one of the toughest things in the world — have “the talk.”

When you sit down with him, first tell him that he is your best friend and talk about how amazing your friendship with him is and how much it means to you. Then, you’ll need to ask him how he would feel if you start dating his ex. You need to be honest, and tell him everything; about how you feel, and if you’re serious about her or still trying to figure this out.

He may be angry and upset at first. He may not want to see you for a week or two. In time, though, he is going to understand; so, if you need to, give him his space. He’s not with her anymore. He is out there dating, having fun and sleeping with other women. Eventually, he is going to get over it.

If this is an amazing woman with whom you have incredible chemistry, women like her don’t come around that often. You have every right to pursue a relationship with her.

This is one of the tough times of your adult adolescence. You’ll need to display complete and total honesty not only with yourself, but with a woman with whom you are in love and also with your friend. This is going to be a tough lesson, but a valuable one. Your ability to be honest and confront difficult conversations with two people you care about, even though they won’t be safe or easy conversations, will exhibit what sort of person you are.

In responding to the survey, one subscriber wrote a great statement:

Whenever I successfully have a girlfriend, it never goes over two months. I am looking for a relationship for a long time and to learn about love.

Getting a girlfriend is really only part of the equation. Learning how to have a meaningful relationship is the whole thing. I have said this to guys so many times, and to women as well. But especially men who are in this situation. So many men spend so much time learning the skills on how to approach women, how to meet women, talk to them and get a phone number, but spend virtually no time at all learning how to have a relationship. That’s where all the work comes in.

All the work comes in when you have a relationship with someone. Eventually, every person will meet a partner. As my good friend in the car business said, “There is an ass for every seat”

I truly believe that there is a person out there for everybody. What I have found in all my years of coaching is that most people don’t prepare themselves for when that relationship happens down the road. To me, that part is huge.

I have said that in blogs so many times before. When I talk about relationship advice, some people will inevitably say, “Oh man, David, why are you writing this? We are here to meet people so we can go on dates, not listen to you talk about relationships with the opposite sex.”

Really? Because if you are not looking at the complete picture, what happens when you finally do meet somebody? You don’t know how to have a relationship with them. You don’t understand what romance is, and you don’t understand how to keep them intrigued. You don’t understand exactly what it means to be needy or desperate, is the best way to put it.

You’ll continue to get into a relationship for a month or two months, then blow it. Then get in another relationship for a month or two, then blow it again. You only understand how to keep them for two months because your partner loses interest in you right away. Why? Because you don’t know how to cultivate the relationship and make it a romantic journey for the both of you.

Here’s a plug for a product, guys. Check out this relationship product I have. It takes you through the first 90 days of a relationship. The crucial first 90 days. I don’t care if you’re not in a relationship right now, I don’t even care if you can’t even approach people right now.

You have got to be prepared in all aspects of your life: physically, emotionally, and sexually. Because if you are not, then you are just going to blow chance after chance after chance and be like the guy above.

“My ex just texted me…look at this text.”

“Oh, that totally reminds me of this time I was with my ex…”

Is the topic of talking about exes a big no-no for you? Does it make you feel uncomfortable?

Have you ever had a bad date where your date would not stop talking about their ex? Do you feel like you wasted the evening over a bad conversation? Even worse, is this a recurring problem in your dating life that’s preventing you from getting anywhere past the first date?

Here’s an email I got from a reader that I’d like to share with you today:

Dear David,

First of all I’d like to say how much I enjoy your products, and advice, that being said….here comes the question:

What do you do when you’re on a first date, and the woman will not stop talking about her Ex?, be it ex husband, or boyfriend, it doesn’t matter…. I mean I make great money, and don’t mind paying for drinks, and such, but my question is how do I stop this? I’ve tried changing the subject, acting uninterested, playing with my BlackBerry, and even asking them to stop, usually at that point, the date is over very soon. I’ll ask for the check, and drive them home, never to call them again. No, this doesn’t happen all the time, but I’d say 50% of the time. If she mentions the ex, or even discusses them a little, that’s ok, but the entire date?? One woman actually showed me a picture of her ex boyfriend!!!! The date was over.

What would David Wygant do?

Thank you,

Larry

I Love My Ex

So why is this happening to you? And what can you do about it?

Click below and listen to today’s podcast as Shogo and I dig in and tell you exactly what’s going on and what you can do to take control and start enjoying your date conversations!

Click Here To Download Today’s Podcast!

I’m going to tell you exactly the way that I feel about something that is really personal to me.

I want you to have an open mind, an open heart. I want you to really feel what I’m feeling. When you read my words, I want you to take them in, and I want you to imagine what it’s like to be me in the situation I’m going through right now. Do I have your attention?

How do you feel right at this present moment?

Is your heart open?

Is your mind open?

Are you ready to read and listen without judgment?

Are you curious about what I have to say? Are you wondering what it is I need to share?

If you’ve answered yes to everything, yes to the open heart, yes to the open mind, yes to being curious about what I have to share, then it means you’re somebody who actually can listen to somebody with an open heart.

So the next time someone comes to you, and tells you that they really need to talk to you about something,

I want you to remember this blog. And I want you to remember what it’s like to stay open. I’ve got nothing to share today. I just wanted to see how open you were. I wanted to see what your reaction was to this. If you felt like you were waiting for something, or you didn’t have the time to listen to my stuff right now, whatever it might be and that’s okay also. But remember, over the next 30 days of your life, somebody is going to come to you, and they’re going to want to talk and they’re going to want to be heard. So you have to drop your shit, and really listen and really figure out and really take in what it’s like to be them in that situation. They’re the biggest keys to relationships, successful relationships, all relationships.

Guess When This Was Taken

Thanks for listening.

You know what my favorite part of a relationship is? The part of the relationship where you have to prove that you love the other person. Prove that you love me. If you love me, you will do this for me. People are nuts when they do that crap.

Prove it? You know, it kind of makes me scratch my head a little bit and makes me think. What, everything I have done up into this moment does not say that I love you? Are we misinterpreting each others’ actions so much that you just don’t understand anything that I do?

So many times, somebody will say that. If you really love me, you will cancel your night out with your friends tonight, and you will come and take me out to dinner. Or, if you really love me you won’t go visit your friends this weekend. You will fly around the world to go see me. Prove that you love me.

How To Prove Your Love

Let me tell you something. You don’t have to prove anything. If they don’t believe that you love them — if they don’t believe that you are into them, then you know what? Those relationships are not worth pursuing. They really aren’t. Any relationship that causes you grief — any relationship that just drives you off the wall and you have to consistently prove yourself to somebody is a relationship with a very needy person. An extremely needy person. Needy people always want things proven to them.

In reality, though, the reason why they always want things proven to them is because they don’t trust themselves in the first place. Prove that you love me. Have you ever dated somebody like that where you have to prove everything, and you are constantly on edge? Share with me today.

For a lot of guys who got mad, it was those who don’t have a
relationship. But everyone reading this has got to realize this blog
and everything else that I teach is not just about meeting people. I’m
prepping you for a future.

It’s great that you come here to learn how to meet the opposite sex
and really work on those skills, but you got to keep them interested.
It’s not just about meeting, it’s about dating, it’s about keeping
them interested. It’s about understanding and crafting a great
relationship. It’s about understanding how to have a great
relationship. So much more about it.

Do You Desire Mean Girls?

But anyway, today I want to talk about acquaintances. You know what
fuckquaintances are? Those are the people you think are your friends,
but they don’t give a fuck about you.

They’re basically acquaintances. We all have them. They could be the
friends of the month, they could be people that you think you’re
friends with, but in reality, so many people that we have in our life
are just acquaintances and just couldn’t give a shit about you. And
it’s something that I think a lot of us need to take inventory.

I believe that when you look at your life, you look at your friends,
and you start to say to yourself, who’s a real friend? Who’s somebody
that I can call when I’m coming into town? Who’s somebody that would
pick me up at the airport? Who are my good friends that I can trust?

Because I think in life we waste so much time on fuckquaintances. So
today, let’s talk about the definition and the real meaning of a real
friend. What would you guys do for a real friend? How far out of the
way would you go for a real friend, and what is the true definition of
friendship to you? Love to hear from all of you.

Do you sometimes get mean and snappy to people who are around you out of the blue? It doesn’t happen to me too often, but sometimes it does.

I know that when I get this way, the reason behind it is because I’m not feeling comfortable in the particular situation that I’m in.

So instead of getting all irritable and snapping at people, think to yourself right beforehand, “Why do I feel this way?” Think to yourself about why you are behaving this way, why you are feeling irritated at the person or about the situation.

The answer to our frustration is usually something that’s going on within ourselves, and not something irritating that somebody else is doing.

It’s because you feel a certain way about that other person but you’re not being open with how you feel about them or the situation. So instead of being honest, communicating your frustration, and dealing with the issue head-on, it’s easier to just get moody and snap at the other person.

So next time remember that it’s actually your issue, and that the only way to deal with it in a meaningful way is to be honest with yourself and communicate what you are really feeling at that moment.
That’s it for today—just a quick tip to start your day.

“Decide what you want, and learn how to ask for it.”

Think about it. You have to make a decision. What do you want? What do you want in a date? What do you want to get out of a date? What do you want in relationships? How do you want to be treated in a relationship? How do you want to be loved? How do you want to give love?

In work, you get to decide how to get a job, how to start a business, how to get clients, how you want your career shaped. The quote above works for everything. But, today, let’s focus in on how it works for relationships.

I truly believe we all have a blueprint, a blueprint on how we need to be loved, how we desire to be loved, and how being loved will satisfy us. All of us need to share this, whether you’re in a relationship or not in relationship. Communicate how you need to be loved. Are you somebody who likes to have sex for long periods, for lots of long, intimate sex sessions? Are you somebody who lives to travel with your partner? Are you somebody who likes deep conversations, and it’s really important? Are you somebody who is all about quality time, no distractions, hanging out? Are you someone that likes to have their head rubbed or their back rubbed?

Learn what you want, decide what you want, and learn how to ask for it.

We give each other the blueprint when we’re first dating, during that excitement phase, when we’re first hanging out with somebody. We tell them everything we need, because we truly trust and believe that this person, this new special person that we feel wonderful things for, really gives a shit and wants to please us, wants to learn, wants to know what we’re all about and how we desire to be loved. Then, in a perfect world, that person will actually do those things that are important to the other person.

The problem is that most relationships dissolve because the other person or both people stop doing the things that are most important to the other person due to whatever battlegrounds ruin those wishes.

Some of us actually suck at delivering what the other person needs. There’s a book called “The Five Love Languages,” which I’ve discussed before. It talks about learning your partner’s love language. Until you learn your partner’s love language, the relationship will be frustrating. Once you learn the love language, then every single day, you can go and do the things necessary. Every day you’ll be able to then do things that fill that person’s love tank. I believe it. I look at all my relationships and I realize the reason they weren’t successful because the woman I dated wasn’t getting their love tank filled, and my love tank wasn’t full either. The book’s great because it really talks about how, even when your love tank is empty, you can go and fill another person’s up, because somebody has to be full. And even though that other person may not react or fill up your love tank for a while, eventually that lover will, if they love you.

Self Love

Decide what you want, and learn how to ask for it. It’s pretty amazing. It’s pretty simple. I think the majority of relationships fail because the couple sits there like two stones on a couch, not reaching, not doing a thing, because the other person isn’t doing it. It all starts usually when one person or both people have really described what they wanted and the other person doesn’t deliver. We’re talking simple things usually what most of us want. I’ve had lots of relationship in my adult life, and it’s mostly simple things that people are asking for. The other person just doesn’t want to deliver. They can deliver for their kids, for their family members, and for their friends. Yet, with you, they won’t do it.

If the other person can’t fulfill yours or doesn’t want to, that could be the end. But you can decide what you want, and learn how to ask for it. Every day, you need to think to yourself, what can I do to fill my partner’s love tank up? You need to do it, otherwise you’re a phony. All those wonderful promises and all those wonderful emotions and wonderful feelings you make and have in the beginning of the relationship are just a facade. If you’re that lazy and that mean – and I’m referring to when people act in a very passive aggressive way to really hurt somebody – you really don’t deserve to have a wonderful relationship.

Relationships take work, and take effort. If you think the next one is magically going to be any better, you’re 100 percent wrong. Because what happens is, you’ll take the same behavior patterns, and lack compassion for the other person’s needs, wants, and desires, and you’ll repeat that same pattern for the next person. Life works that way. It’s really that easy. Decide what you want and learn how to ask for it.

You’re in a relationship, but you don’t really want to be in a relationship, so you’re constantly going out with friends (or telling your significant other that you’re going out with friends). But what you’re really doing is secretly making yourself available so you can look for something better, look for a replacement for the man or woman that you’re with.

Have you ever been on a date that’s not going really well, but you see someone else you’re attracted to sitting by the bar? So you sneak away—just for a second—to go flirt with the person at the bar so maybe that can be your next date…

We’ve all done this from time to time. We’ve all performed the “sneak around.” Whether we cheated on our significant other, we were out on a date and secretly talked to someone else we were attracted to, or just plain and simple we did not want to be in the relationship and avoided our partner instead of confronting the issue.

The Cheatanator

Isn’t it amazing how many things we do instead of just being honest? You realize what a waste of time the “sneak around” is. You’re in a bad relationship, yet you’re sneaking around hoping any issues will miraculously be solved. You don’t have the balls to get out of the relationship, so you spend all this time and effort lying, sneaking around, daydreaming about living a different lifestyle and not living your own life freely and openly, and not living your life so you are truly enjoying yourself.

Think about all those things that you do in life in order to avoid hurting your partner, even if you don’t want to be with them anymore. But in reality, you’re going to end up hurting them in the long run by sneaking around and prolonging the inevitable, and not being open and honest with them. And in the end, you’re not facing your own issues head-on, and you’re actually really hurting yourself.