Yesterday we all went to Spitalfields Market, and everyone met so many cool women. For those of you who are in London, Spitalfields is a must. I ate so much great food again, I really stuffed myself. Then we sat to digest for a bit as I lead a really “heavy” discussion on dating!! Bo-bump-bump…pshhh!
You know that sound, that “bo-bump-bump” drum sound you hear at a bad comedy show? You know what “bo-bump-bump” is? That’s not just reserved for late-night talk shows, it’s also you when you become Punch-Line Guy.

Are you the guy that read somewhere on the Internet that women are really attracted to the funny guy? So now, in every conversation you have, you always want to make sure that you can show you’re funny, that you get the punch line out as quickly as possible? Basically you are punch line guy. You’re that guy who, within a minute of a conversation, whatever the topic, you have to end the conversation with this funny joke (well, at least that you think it’s funny).

Here’s the deal guys: That really takes both you and her out of a moment that could have been special. Punch-line guys tend to kill conversations because there’s not much to go on after you spew your cheesy punch-line. Especially if the punch line wasn’t that funny, maybe she’ll chuckle a little bit and then she’ll just realize the conversation is ending.
What most punch-line guys do is they just end the conversation with that mediocre punch line, they don’t keep it rolling. They take a perfectly good conversation and they feel like they have to spit the joke out somewhere to show her that they’re funny.

The reality is that you have plenty of chances to show her that you’re funny—at the right moments. But your problem is that you can’t risk waiting to be naturally funny, waiting to be funny at all the right moments. You have to do it now, you have to try to create the punch line moment because this is the ONLY moment to show her you’re worth getting to know.
I know what this is like because I used to be punch line guy. I was the class clown, I used to sit back and wait for my punch line in class. When I was first learning to talk to women, I’d always anticipate and wait for the punch line. I’d throw it out there and expect a big laugh but I never realized, when I was younger, that actually killed a lot of good conversations because I was killing the momentum.

All the punch line does is show that you’re not really listening and adding the conversation, it just shows that you want to be the center of attention, because that’s what punch line guy really is. He wants to be validated, he wants people to think he’s funny, and he wants to be the center of attention. So the next time you have your punch line guy moment, think to yourself, Is this really a proper moment for the punch line? Think about that. Will it keep the conversation flowing, or will it end the conversation like it has in the past?

What? Even if you’re actually busy? I can’t believe that. They are constantly threatening, but the funny thing about ultimatum girls — and they are always so dramatic — is that you originally tried to make plans with them in the beginning.

They just like to cause drama, so they basically ignored you, and then all of a sudden you go and make alternate plans, and then right when you are in the middle of your alternate plans, having a good time, trying to relax — because you are basically pretty pissed off that they blew you off all day long — all of a sudden, then they throw the ultimatum ball right at you:
“If you don’t leave right now…”
“Well, I really can’t go anywhere right now. I am out to dinner with my parents.”
“Leave your parents right now!”

They are ultimatum girls. They are all about drama. They get off on it. They really do. And, if you think about — when you are dating ultimatum girl, think about when the best sex is. The best sex with them is when they have given their ultimatum, they threaten you a little bit, they get in a little fight with you, and then all of a sudden they fuck you like a maniac because they love it. They love the drama. They get off on the drama.

Are You Dating A Drama Queen

Ultimatum girls cum a lot harder when they have drama. They really do. You want an ultimatum girl to be multi-orgasmic? You know what? Basically, when she ignores you, go out. Do the thing you wanted to do. She is going to send you an ultimatum, and then boom. The sex is going to be off the charts.

That is what ultimatum girl does. Ultimatum girl gets off on the whole thing and she knows it. But yet, usually, she is not that in touch with herself to know why she does this. She says she doesn’t like this dramatic behavior, but in reality, she does like it. It turns her on.

Because the average guy would bore her. She likes a guy that is a mind-fucking challenge to her. She likes to try to control a man, and then she finds a man that she can’t control, and then what she tries to do then is she tries to threaten him with ultimatums, but the problem is she usually runs into somebody who is very stubborn and she gets off on it. It’s a game.

Ultimatum girl isn’t looking for the bad boy. Ultimatum girl is basically looking for the guy that just doesn’t put up with her fucking shit.

But now – according to the world of pickup people all over this world
- a night game is something entirely different.

As the lights dim, the crowd smells like a bad bar—people protruding
vomit from both ends. A woman stumbles her way in, and four guys
quickly look, and think to themselves: “Aah! Night game! Perfect
target: A woman drunk, stumbling. I’ll be able to use some of my Bob
Seger ‘Night Moves’ on her.”

Night moves are even different than day game. Night game is for the
real pro: The guy that really knows how to pick up a really drunk
woman; the guy that really knows how to make a really drunk woman feel
good; the guy who knows how to approach in the wee hours of the
morning. It’s called night game.

Pickup women at wrigley

It’s so funny—the terminology that guys use for meeting women. There’s
day game, which of course is easy to figure out. It’s getting women
during the day. But how come no one’s ever come up with the term
day-night doubleheader? You know, in baseball, you play one game in
the afternoon, one game at night—it becomes a day-night doubleheader.
So what about the guy that goes out late in the afternoon and then
tries to meet women at night? Is it a day-game night-game
doubleheader? Wouldn’t that be considered a day-night double header?

What about the guy that only preys on drunken women that reek of
vomit? Would he be an opportunist? Would he be just a drunk prowler?
Drunk prowler: There’s a new terminology. There’s so much terminology
out there—it’s hilarious.

Can you imagine if women talked like this? Can you imagine if they
decided to go out and say “Hey Mary, this is Amy. Let’s go out and
have some night game tonight. Let’s go out and find some men tonight,
maybe a three set, maybe a four set. Maybe we’ll get a couple of
drunken guys, and we’ll go home, and we’ll get an instant drunken date
with them.” Can you imagine if women spoke that way? Can you imagine
if women actually said “Hey man, this is Amy again, let’s go out and
meet some guys during the day. Want to practice our day game moves
right now?” It’s hilarious. And men have to use terminology.

But with women, it’s all about serendipitous moments—real moments that
can happen either during the daytime or the nighttime. Night game and
day game are one.

Come on guys. Let’s talk as men. You know I’ve written about the
ratings scale—she’s a seven, she’s an eight, she’s a nine. You know
how much I hate that. Either it’s a one or a two. One you like her, or
two you don’t. There you go. Another friend of mine says it’s either
yes or no. Yes you’re attractive, or no you’re not.

Can you imagine if women actually graded men? “Mary, why are you going
out with him? He’s only like a 7.2! He really needs to lose a little
bit of weight so he can fit into his bathing suit better.” Guys are so
messed up.

I can tell you one thing.

Insomnia is brutal! Anyway here are my quick thoughts for today.

So you went out on a Saturday and you talked to 47 women, and you didn’t connect with any of them.

You did everything right.

You commented based on a real observation, you responded to what she said in the moment, you spoke what was on your mind, but yet,it just didn’t click.

You didn’t click with any of them.

You know why? It’s because you haven’t met anybody who appreciates you yet, so who gives a shit? Who cares?

You’ve got to appreciate you. No one’s going to appreciate you unless you appreciate yourself first.

Look at all the people you do business with, all the people you interact with professionally. Do they do business with you, do they think you’re cool as hell? It’s because they see you as you really are.

When we look at ourselves, we all see our neurotic sides.

Every time someone asks me this, all I can picture is this giant chicken wing dripping with buffalo sauce running around next to them. I picture them constantly having to clean off their shoes from all the buffalo sauce that is dripping off their wing.

So is it better to run with a wing or to run by yourself? The answer is that it is always better to run by yourself.

If you’re by yourself, then it’s like you are the complete master of every conversation. If you run with a wing, then all of a sudden you are opening up your conversations to someone else.

That someone else will jump in your conversations and might even end up dominating the conversation. Even worse, they might end up turning off the very person you are trying to intrigue because they aren’t listening.

If you are having a great conversation with a woman, your wing might end up feeling neglected and want to leave. I’ve seen women wings do that all the time. A woman will having a great time talking to a guy in a bar, and the woman wing will get annoyed and start tugging on the woman telling her that they need to go somewhere else.

Meet Women With Wings

I’ve seen so many wing scenarios go badly. So it’s much better to go alone.

Going alone also forces you to learn to speak with people when you are alone. You don’t want to just stand in the corner by yourself. Going it alone forces you to go out there and communicate with people.

So going alone is something all of you need to do. It’s something I personally really enjoy. My best conversations always happen when I go out alone.

The way I do it is really easy. I happen to have been born with a zipper on my skull, so all I have to do is peel back my toupee, unzip the back of my head, and crawl out (usually feet first). It’s a really interesting phenomenon to watch me, because I’ll just be there laying on the ground and then all of a sudden I’ll whip my toupee off, unzip my head and crawl right out.

Sometimes I’ll get out shoulders first, then I go heart, then I go stomach, then I go groin, then I go legs. Sometimes if I’m in a really flexible mood, though, I’ll be able to get my legs all the way up to my head.

Okay, obviously I’m kidding about all of this. How do you really get out of your head though?

Dating Head Games

The way I learned how to do it was by writing everything down. I kept a journal, and every day I wrote down like a maniac all my thoughts, fears and insecurities.

When I did that, I found that there was a recurring theme. I would go and try to talk to people. If it didn’t work, I would go and write all my feelings down instead of getting totally inside my head.

I’d write everything down because by getting all my thoughts and fears out of my head, I never remained in my head. I put all that “stuff” somewhere else, and that allowed me to move forward.

The key thing to understand is that when you keep all these thoughts, feelings and insecurities in your head, you tend to over-think things. When you over-think things, there is no way in the world you’re going to be able to react to situations in the right way. There’s no way in the world you are going to be able to meet people.

So the next time you’re in your head, write down what you’re feeling. Get it out. Become self-aware. It’s a great exercise for all of you to do.

Are you the shot buyer? That’s my favorite guy to watch when I go to a bar.

You walk into a bar and there he is. You’re standing next to this guy who says to everyone around him, “You guys want a shot?”

He’s always in a group of a few guys who are basically laughing at all of his jokes because he is a fun, jovial guy. He’s the shot buyer. He’s the guy who is buying drinks for people all night long.

So whenever women come around his general direction, he is always buying them a drink. He’ll say things like, “Come on girls, I’ll buy you a drink (or a shot)” or “Do a shot with me.”

Wheres Bill

The shot buyer is always a really nice guy. The problem is that getting people drunk usually doesn’t mean you’re going to connect with them.

You’re the fun guy. You’re the mixologist. You’re the party guy.

In reality, though, a lot of women don’t want to hang out with the shot buyer. They don’t want to hang out with the party guy. You’re fun for about ten or fifteen minutes.

When you get to a certain point in your life — when you’re 35 or 40 years old — you don’t really want to be the shot guy anymore. Women aren’t looking at you as the fun guy at this point. They are looking at you and wondering if you’re ever going to outgrow your college years.

Being the shot guy at 22 or 24 years old makes you the fun guy. You are a blast. You are the guy everyone calls and curses the next morning because they are so hungover from all the shots you bought them.

When you’re a bit older and you’re still the shot guy, however, it is probably the reason you are not meeting quality women. Most women can’t and don’t want to be drinking as much as you do.

So look deeper, Mr. Shot Buyer, and tell me if you’re REALLY happy buying everybody another round — or whether this behavior is masking a general disappointment in how you feel about your social life.

When you find that person you are like, take some time and watch ‘yourself.’ See how you act. See how you come off to people. See how people respond to you.

If you are not successful in a bar, then you probably are a lurker. So go ahead and watch ‘yourself’ as the lurker — watch a fellow lurker so you understand why you are not having much success.

Connecting with women is very simple. Make an observation, react, talk about the observation further. Speak with clarity, conviction and confidence. It is no different in a bar than anywhere else.

I don’t write about bars that often, but in reality they are a blast. They are a blast when you understand the dynamics of human communication. If you are a lurker, though, you don’t get it yet.

So look in the mirror. If you are a lurker, admit it and go seek medical help. Okay, you probably don’t need medical help — but you do need to seek my help!

You go to your first dinner party, and most of your friends — the ones who used to go out drinking with you a few years ago — are married and looking at you as the lone single guy. You’re like the Lone Ranger all by yourself.

It actually makes you feel like something is wrong with you. Your own mother and grandmother gang up on you and say, “When are you finally going to meet someone and settle down? We need grandchildren!”

It’s called the late pressure. It’s almost like the full-court press, or like Rex Ryan sending seven defensive backs at you when you only have three wide receivers. How are you going to find the open man?

How are you going to find that woman with whom to ‘settle down?’ You start to put pressure on yourself, and you do what I did in my late 20′s: You go on a wife hunt.

The wife hunt is very scary because what you’re doing is you’re looking for somebody with whom you can join that dinner party. You are finding someone so that you no longer have to go to those dinner parties alone.

I did this. I went on a wife hunt, and I ended up with somebody who was really one of my best friends. I was never really super sexually attracted to her. I loved her, but always looked at her at that friend. You don’t want to make that mistake.

If you go on a wife hunt, you are probably just going to accept whomever comes your way and you are not going to get exactly who you want. Marriage is really serious, though, and you need to think it through before you do it.

You need to find someone who is just like you — thinks like you, acts like you, and shares the same beliefs and interests. You need to find someone who can teach you things and help you grow as a person.

When you go on a wife hunt, there’s no way in the world you’re going to find that. You are going to find whatever is available.

It’s almost like when you go to rent a house. Just imagine if you gave yourself two years to find the perfect house to rent, and during that time you go and look at a lot of houses. Eventually, you are going to find the right one. You’re going to find the one that fits who you are. You’re going to find one in the right location and at the right price.

When you have to have something — or feel pressure to get something — within a certain time limit, then the results of what you end up getting is never as good. If you feel like you need to find a wife in six months or less, then you may find one but she likely will not be the right one. You’re not going to find the woman with whom you want to spend the rest of your life.

This is your life. So the next time someone starts asking you why you’re not married yet, realize that there is no good that comes from feeling the need to act under their pressure.

Instead you should look them in the eye and say, “I just haven’t met the right person yet. Do you have anybody you can introduce me to? I’d like to meet someone amazing. I’d like to meet somebody with whom I can spend my life, but I am not going to rush it.”

This is exactly what I used to tell people after my first wife hunt. People would look at me and sometimes you would see that look in their eyes that said that they found their wife on a wife hunt (and may or may not have found the right person).

This is your life. Take your time. Enjoy it! Find the right wife even if it takes a long time, and be sure sure to enjoy every moment and every woman you experience along the way.

Does anyone know what an “entrance man” is?

A lot of guys always wonder how to really be successful when they go out to a bar. A lot of women wonder about this as well actually. Honestly, it’s all about how you make your entrance.

When you walk into a bar for the very first time, you really are just walking into a live show. People are looking around, wondering what to do and looking for things to talk about with people.

So if you walk into a bar and you see somebody that you know, then you need to walk over there and act like you haven’t seen that person in ten years. Give them a big hug or kiss (or whatever it might be) and look really excited by it. What happens when you do that is that you create intrigue and attraction.

People will be wondering about you. They will be thinking, “who is that person who made this grand entrance into the room?”

if you look around a typical bar, most people have the exact same look about them. They have their hands in their pockets swaying back and forth, and are sitting there wondering what to do and say.

So being “entrance man” is really important. It’s all about creating attraction and intrigue.

That is why whenever I walk into a place, I find someone I can connect with right away. I always stand right in the middle of the bar, and talk and have a good time with my friends. I smile. I laugh. I look around and make eye contact with other people. I have complete control of my situation and my surroundings.

Most guys don’t do that. Most guys walk into a bar and head right to the corner. They become “corner man,” where they are basically hanging out in the corner all night long wondering what to do, what to say, and how to talk.

If you’re going to go to a bar at night, then you stand right in the center of that bar with your friend and have a good time. Let other people become attracted to you!

Yes, notice what other people are doing and when other people are looking at you. When someone is looking at you, you make sure you acknowledge them. Smile at them, and then wave them over.

You are going to do all of this because you’ve become “entrance man,” and you’re the center of attention now. That’s exactly why I wait and hang out in the center of the bar — because I am always allowing other people to become attracted to me.

And do you know what always happens the first night of bootcamp?

Right away I have to deprogram a few of the guys.

So how do i deprogram them?

I basically take their crutches away and get them to walk on there own without the use of pick up lines!

You all know how I feel about pickup lines so last night I was all about deprogramming some guys minds.

So how can I help you and your mind today?

Glad you asked.

Today’s video has all the answers!