I can’t believe it’s week 5. Week 5 in the NFL season, and I’m 12-1 in my picks so far.
My football record stands on its own at 12-1. 12-1 is pretty good I think. The Titans are my only blemish. So, with that, I am going to go out on a limb and tell you which teams I’m picking this week
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The Giants are going to dominate over the high school quarterback led Oakland Raiders. The Vikings will be victorious over the Rams and its equally inept quarterback. Really, the Rams aren’t rams at all; they’re more like goats.
The Ravens will beat the Bengals. I’m not buying all the hype about the Bengals yet.
Here’s another tough pick. The Eagles will beat the Buccaneers. Let me tell you, Jon Gruden is laughing every single day. They fired him? Are you kidding me?
Braylon Edwards will catch a pass and lead the Jets to a victory over the finless Dolphins. The Patriots will win big.
Denver is going down this week. Is that not the worst 4-0 team you’ve ever seen?
Dante Culpepper will wish he was still on the bench after the Steelers destroy him on Sunday. As for the Buffalo vs Cleveland game, really who cares? It’s not even worth predicting.
As for Dallas, Tony Romo better start learning that finding the end zone is not as easy as finding one of his celebrity girlfriends. Maybe he should go back and run one of his family’s rib businesses. Tony Romo notwithstanding, Dallas will squeak a win out this week.
What is it about ex-boyfriends and ex-girlfriends? They seem to somehow know the exact wrong time to text you.
Here you are, about to have sex with your partner, and all of a sudden there it is. You hear that certain beep telling you that you have just received a text message.
You think to yourself, “Oh man, who is texting me? It’s really late. Who is texting me?” You get nervous about those 1:00 a.m. texts that come in.
It’s nerve-racking, because the only one who should be texting you at 1:00 a.m. is the person with whom you are laying in bed at that very moment. So you keep wondering who texted, until you can’t stand it anymore and you instinctively check your phone like Pavlov’s Dog.
At first you are relieved and you think, “Whew! Thank God it’s not me.” Then all of a sudden you notice that it is your partner’s phone that is blinking. You both have the same “beep” for incoming text messages, and the beep that you heard is theirs (not yours).
Now you think to yourself, “Oh man, I know EXACTLY who just texted them. It’s the ex.”
So here you are laying in bed, either just about to have sex or just having had great sex, and you have to have “the ex talk.” You may have already had the ex talk before several times. When that ex intrudes into your personal space at 1:00 a.m., however, that ex talk goes into a whole other dimension.
You will lay there wondering what your partner is thinking and feeling. You will want to know what the emotions are that they are experiencing, and how they are feeling at that moment about their ex.
Ex’s are a very powerful influence in a relationship. Even though you are with somebody new and you are sharing amazing feelings together, you will still wonder what your partner is thinking and feeling about their ex when a text comes in like that.
You tell yourself that you are not going to let your paranoid mind take over. After all, it is you who is laying next to then (and not the ex). You are the one with whom they are now hanging out and sharing feelings.
Regardless, you have that ex talk right there and then at 1:00 a.m. You are wondering about it, and your partner really needs to let out whatever is on their mind about it.
You need to be 100% okay with whatever they say, because the topic needs to come up and your partner needs to get out what is on their mind. Eventually, your partner is going to need to confront the ex issue, because at some point the ex needs to stop holding on to whatever part of that old relationship to which they are clinging.
The key is that your partner needs to feel that there is an open space where they can talk to you no matter what is going on and no matter what they have to say. They need to feel like they can talk to you anytime and about anything, because building a relationship is all about open lines of communication. That is the only way that two people are going to get close.
I am always fine with the ex talk because I like clean slates. Both people need to have clean slates when you’re in a relationship, and sometimes you need to clean those slates together to get there.
You’ve got to deal with things. Relationships are all about supporting one another.
Before we get to today’s blog (which, by the way, is going to be hilarious) about everybody Facebook fighting, I have to ask. Do you remember that song?
Everybody Is Kung Fu Fighting.
Those cats were fast as lightning…
So, now you guys realize that not only do I give masterful dating advice, but I’m 3-0 on my football picks so far. I told you the Saints were going to beat the Lions. I told you the Jets were going to beat the Patriots. I also told you the Colts would squeak by the Dolphins last night.
Not only am I going to find you your next relationship and get you laid on your next date, but I’m actually going to put money into your pockets. I’m 3-0 already, so check back on Friday for my next pick…
Let’s talk today about Facebook fighting. How many of you are on Facebook?
For those of you who are, be sure to add me as a friend. I love seeing what my readers are up to in their life.
Today we’re going to talk about another phenomenon: Facebook fighting. Sing along to that tune with these words:
Everybody was Facebook fighting.
Those words are fast as lightening
Whenever you add a new friend of the opposite sex
You’re going to start brawling…
A friend of mine emailed me yesterday to say he and his girlfriend were fighting. Apparently his girlfriend saw that he added a friend on Facebook who was female, she wondered ‘who is this woman,’ and it caused a big fight. His girlfriend thought it was some girl he had the hots for that he added as a friend.
C’mon! Look at almost anyone’s Facebook friends. There is usually about 500 of them, and people usually only actually communicate with about one percent of those people.
I have thousands of friends on Facebook, but I couldn’t tell you about even one hundred of them. I know that Jim Almond had trouble chewing some nuts yesterday and was choking. I know someone else had hemorrhoids and decided to share that with everyone on Facebook.
I know yet another person (who supposedly is my friend) is having trouble with insomnia and wants to know how to get rid of it. I can tell him how to get rid of it. Get off Facebook late at night!
Really, though, so many people are Facebook fighting just like my friend emailed to me about what happened with his girlfriend. I mean, some new girl befriended him and his girlfriend thought he was having an affair.
People are changing their relationship status on a daily basis on Facebook. How many times do you look at someone’s page and see their relationship status listed as “It’s complicated?” Sure, it’s complicated, but do you need to tell the whole world?
Some things are private. Why do you need to announce to the whole world that you’re having problems in your relationship?
I love when people say on Facebook that they’re single again. Now that’s marketing. What a great place to date.
Facebook actually is a great place to date. Do you know why?
People put up their real picture (unlike on match.com), not their fantasy picture of how they looked ten years ago or their “body-less picture” with just their head showing. People actually put up their real photos because they think their friends are the only ones looking at them.
People don’t like a cheesy dating profile like they see so often on match.com. Facebook is also great because people tell you their real age and what they really do for a living. It seems like everyone on match.com is 29 or 39 years old, in great shape and wealthy.
On Facebook you get the truth. It’s a much better place to date because it’s not meant for dating (or is it?). People are Facebook fighting, but they’re also Facebook dating.
So, really, you should not air your dirty laundry on the Internet. No one should fight on the Internet.
I’ve heard of people breaking up on Facebook. Someone will go to their significant other’s page and all of a sudden discover they’ve been de-friended and blocked.
The Internet is wonderful and social networking sites like Facebook are wonderful for reconnecting and finding old friends. They should, however, never be used for airing your dirty laundry.
If you are Facebook fighting — and for those of you who don’t have the tune in your head already — check out this video and fight out why everyone used to be Kung Fu Fighting and are now Facebook fighting.
If you really want to see what Facebook can do to relationships check out this funny video.
I think I’m going to change professions. As predicted here on Saturday, the Jets beat the Patriots on Sunday. I think I even predicted they would win by a touchdown (which was what happened).
So not only can I predict the outcome of your dates, I can predict the outcome of football games for you too. Regarding your dates, I predict that most of them probably won’t go really well. That’s not to be negative, but the majority of dates don’t go well.
The Jets are the only team not to allow an offensive touchdown this year. That impresses me. Do you know who impresses me more? Rex Ryan, the Jets’ coach.
So much of life is all about coaching — in football, basketball, baseball . . . and even in dating. Without the right mentor, coach and system in place, you’re never going to get good at anything.
Life is really all about having good systems — good belief systems and good coaching systems. There’s a reason why Bill Belichick makes the Patriots competitive no matter which players they lose. It’s the system he’s put in place. Every player believes in him and believes in being a Patriot.
Life is also all about your mindset. Yesterday I saw a good friend of mine, Dr. Wayne Dyer, speak. I really enjoyed it. Here’s a man who has lived 69 years with the right mindset and belief systems, and he’s accomplished everything in his life that he’s ever wanted.
Without the right mindset, coaching and guidance, people will remain lost. How many of you resist change? How many of you have trouble changing because of your belief system? How many of you fear change, but yet you desire it so much?
Who coaches you through your hard times? To whom do you go for advice?
How honest are you with yourself about the changes that need to be made in your life? Are you someone who repeats the same mistakes over and over again, yet you can’t figure out how to change that pattern?
It’s all about coaching. It’s all about implementing a belief system that can work for you, and a belief system that will still get you to make changes on a daily basis even if things don’t always work out for you.
The reason why the Jets won yesterday, was because they made changes to their game plan at halftime. They came out in the second half, and Mark Sanchez began throwing the ball. They got the lead, and then basically proceeded to shut the Patriots down for the rest of the second half.
How did they do this? They made changes necessary to dictate the flow of the game in their favor.
Can you dictate the flow of your life in your favor? Can you do it even after frustrating things and setbacks happen to you? Can you recover quickly from rejection, or do you allow it to torture you all day long?
When something doesn’t go my way, I recover instantly. I shake it off as any good well-coached person will do.
I don’t allow things to affect me for any longer than they need to affect me. Whatever happens to me affects me in the moment, then I get over it and don’t remember even five minutes later why I was so shaken.
The systems I’m talking about are not some kind of magic system to pick up men or women. It’s about having a belief system. It’s about having the right belief system.
What is your belief system? What changes do you need to make in order to accomplish everything you want?
Wayne said is really well yesterday. He said that we should all spend the last five minutes of each day before we go to sleep imagining how we want the next day to be, imagining how we want our life to be, and imagining how that will feel.
You don’t want to spend the end of your days thinking about what didn’t get done, what you messed up and what you haven’t achieved. By thinking this way, a lot of you are programming yourself to be in a constant state of panic (that begins from the moment you wake up).
So today on this Monday, I challenge all of you to write down all the things you want to change, and how you will feel when you implement those changes.
For those of you who are looking to bet on tonight’s game — because you know I am a master handicapper — the game will be a lot closer than you think. The Colts, however, will squeeze out a win when the Dolphins forget to throw to Ted Ginn.
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