“Hey David! Are you there?”
“Hey David, Can I ask you a question?”
“Hey David – I have a situation with a woman right now … ”

Things like that are popping up nonstop on my screen. It’s really funny that there are all these ways to contact me in ways I don’t want to be contacted.

Now, don’t get me wrong. I love hearing from people, but I have one email address — david@davidwygant.com — that I want people to use to contact me.
People will be on my website, but for some reason or other decide to contact me via Facebook.

It’s not just Facebook. I get things from MySpace. I get things from Twitter. I get them from all over the place. I get people who just randomly text me nonstop saying things like “Hey, how are you?”

What is so funny is that in this age of communication where people are so good at communicating via all these different methods — Facebook, Twitter, MySpace etc — that people still can’t say hello to each other in a store. Pretty wild, isn’t it?

Can you imagine us all walking around with laptops around our necks? Every time we’d pass someone, their Facebook page immediately shows up on our laptop screen. So instead of actually talking to them, you can just send them an IM as they’re shopping in the grocery store aisles.

You could be sitting in traffic and, all of a sudden, you notice you’re attracted to the person driving in the car next to you. You could then immediately jump on their MySpace page, IM them and say “Hey you! I’m in the car next to you. Want to chat?”

People don’t do this in real life. Seems like everyone is good in the cyberworld, but lousy in reality, and the fact is that reality is the only thing that matters.

The other day I was walking near these two kids who were about ten or twelve years old. They were texting their friends and ignoring each other.

I remember when I was a kid, we used to go on roadtrips all the time. We actually used to look out the window and see what was going on around us. Now, kids stare at DVD screens in the car and text their friends.

It’s amazing how many people complain nonstop about how they’re not meeting anyone. The reason a lot of people aren’t meeting anyone is because they have their head up their electronic ass all day long!

As most of you know, I’ve been looking for an iPhone. One guy said to me that if I get the 3G iPhone, that it may not be compatible with the T-Mobile network making the mobile web service work a lot more slowly. I told him I didn’t really care because I don’t need the mobile web nonstop.

I like to connect with people, say hello to my friends and neighbors, and get to know new people. Also, what ever happened to learning what someone is all about as a person? I don’t need to read it on a Facebook page or a MySpace page. I can actually walk up to people and find out more information in five minutes than I ever would on their Facebook page or MySpace page.

When people write in cyberspace, it is often a bunch of lies. Everyone writes as the person they want to be, not the person they really are. Everybody makes themselves sound so perfect, and they do it on dating sites as well too.

So, really, think about the amount of hours you spend IMing people, texting people and trying to get in touch with old friends. Think about all the time you spend reconnecting with people whom you really haven’t connected with in so long.

We’re all looking for those great friendships or that great love, and we’re doing everything we possibly can to find them. We’re reconnecting on Facebook with people we dated twenty years ago to see if there’s anything to be rekindled with that old flame.

In reality, though, how much time are you spending every day actually going out and meeting people? This is what I’m teaching you here. It’s about the spark you can find in everyday life. It’s about living life and not spending so much time in cyberspace.

As I sit here wasting time not only checking out all the useless emails on Facebook, I want to also tell people to stop tagging people, hitting them with water guns, and all the other stupid applications that Facebook offers. Who cares if someone wants to squirt you with a water gun?

Great! Come to my house, talk to me, and then let’s get into an old-fashioned water gun fight instead of you tagging me with an imaginary water gun in this imaginary world called Facebook.

Are you ready to put down the Facebook pages and meet women out and about in the real world? Summer is a great time to meet people at street fairs.

Check this out and be inspired:)

I don’t know what you all think of MySpace or Facebook, but in my opinion, social networking sites are borderline weird – especially if you’re like me and have dated somebody who basically lived for them.

Earlier this year, I was actually dating a Facebook/MySpace junkie. So today, Rey was on the computer when he started laughing really loudly. When I asked him what was up, he told me that I had been removed from her friend list.

I was removed from both her MySpace and Facebook friend lists. Is this elementary school? Have I been banned from the tree house? Have I been eliminated?

Do you remember that tree house when you were a kid? The one that you weren’t allowed to enter because you weren’t cool enough or something?

So I’m no longer on her Facebook or MySpace page. Is that supposed to hurt me? I moved on the day she left! I couldn’t wait for the relationship to end – because it just wasn’t right.

So now she’s punishing me? By taking me off of her MySpace and Facebook pages? Really, are we in kindergarten? “You can’t have this piece of gum because I don’t like you anymore!”

How many of you eliminate people from your life and then subsequently eliminate them from your MySpace and Facebook pages as well?

Is that supposed to be the final slap? So we can’t play anymore online. She can’t tag me or bite me. She can’t poke me anymore?

That’s quite all right – because we’re done ‘poking’ in reality as well! I don’t need to be poked in fantasyland. We already poked in real life and it didn’t work out, and now the relationship is over. I don’t need to be poked on Facebook.

It’s the same way that I feel about strip clubs. Why go and get someone to grind on you when it’s totally fake?

I’m all about reality – not fantasy. So for those of you who play around on MySpace and Facebook – I’m talking about poking, rearranging your top five friends like they’ve earned a promotion – stop!

I remember when I was hanging out with this girl – she used to rearrange her top five friends on MySpace depending on the mood she was in that day.

Seriously. This isn’t elementary school, and it’s not a popularity contest – oh wait, it’s the internet, I forgot that it is a popularity contest!

First, you have to look at your mutual friends. Obviously, you couldn’t be looking at her profile if you don’t have a mutual friend. You’re not cruising Facebook – you’re just looking through other people’s friends.

Joe Smith sends you a friend request, and you don’t know him, so you look at his friends. You see Mary Thompson is one of his friends, and you add her as a friend.

And of course Mary Thompson confirms you as a friend – because the internet is a fucking popularity contest and everyone wants a lot of friends! Facebook and MySpace are like having 5,000 friends that you never talk to! They could give a fuck about me, but they are still all of my buddies.

But when I show up as their happy friend, it makes them feel popular. Being on the internet is like regressing back to junior high school. Don’t you feel bad on Facebook when you see someone with like two friends? You think to yourself, oh, what a loser, he’s got two friends! It’s ridiculous; it’s such a popularity contest.

So anyway, you go to this woman’s profile and add her as a friend. She will always add you, and then you send her an email.

Subject line: Man, Joe knew we would be…

I always like the dot-dot-dot because when it comes down to marketing yourself, you have to think like a business. Most people in the subject line of an email write “hello.” What the fuck, hello? Delete.

But you know when you get good junk email, and you swear that you don’t want to open it, and when you do open it, you’re like, oh shit, I got caught again! How did you get caught? They had a good subject line, right? So your subject line has to be something good that will make her want to open your email.

And then the body of the email: …that we would be great friends, so I added you. So now that you’re my really good friend, can you help me out with one thing? Who the hell is Joe Smith? He just appeared one day as my friend, and I’m hoping you can hope me unlock the mystery of Joe Smith. ☺

You do the smiley face so that she knows that you are funny and clever.

She’s going to open it, giggle and laugh, and she’s going to answer you back. You just became her buddy. Then your messages will go back and forth just like any other email exchange.

You have to get clever. Most guys are so bad at emailing.

A lot of guys just hang with the same guys every weekend. You’ve seen these mantourages cruise the bars every Friday and Saturday night – usually there’s a group of guys consistently drinking as if drinking were a sport!

They actually plan out their meals – “hey dude, we’ve got to eat pizza at 7:00, start drinking at 8:30, and you don’t want to have that extra slice because the alcohol will kick in faster!”

Living in California, there are lots of mantourages running around. If you’ve ever gone down to Manhattan Beach, there’s mantourages on the beach – they’re usually the group of guys with the keg, hanging out all day long like they are 20 years old again!

But they’re not. Then they go back to their group house that they share in their thirties, and they sit down on the lawn furniture that decorates their living room – they thought that was cool!

So what do women do? Well, women join chickourages!

You know the woman: she’s out with her friends and out comes the digital camera at every moment? “Here it comes… the digital camera!” You never see guys walk around all the time with their digital cameras, saying, “hey, Joe, why don’t you and Jimmy get together right now and we’ll take a picture! This is a great picture moment!”

But women are whipping out that camera non-stop. Everywhere they go. Judy tries on a new dress and here comes the camera. Out for margaritas? Here comes the camera. Out with a group of friends at a bachelorette party? Here comes the camera!

Look at this! We’re in the airport, on the way to Mexico – here comes the camera. On the airplane, when the stewardess spills something – here comes the camera.

That camera comes out everywhere. Women have become documentary filmmakers. They shoot their entire lives. You have to look at every single picture that they have. It’s amazing – every single time, the camera comes out.

Judy tries on a new bathing suit? Out comes the camera. There they are on the beach in Mexico – out comes the camera.

And the funny thing about it is that every woman that you see on either Myspace or Facebook seems like a chronic alcoholic! Every single picture has alcohol in it. Yet these women will write on profiles on dating sites: drink? Hardly ever.

But still there are 75 pictures of them sucking down alcohol. It seems like either they are lying or they really are chronic alcoholics!

But it’s funny with these women and their chickourages. If you go to a woman’s Myspace page, it’s like a visual biography of her entire life! “There I am when I was 15 – oops, there’s a drink in my hand.” “There I was at 19 – there’s a drink in my hand.” “Hey, there I was last week,” and there’s still a drink in her hand. You’d think they’d send them to AA instead of Myspace!

Women have to document everything. The funny thing about it that the women actually send you updates: “I updated my Myspace page today.” And you think, wow, that’s so exciting, why don’t I go look at more pictures of you and your friends? I’d rather see you naked, in the flesh, in front of me then see pictures of you with your chickourage!

Todays podcast dives deeper into the real uses of facebook and my space.

Can you date on them or just become popular.

What you are about to hear is something that facebook or my space never wants to admit.
Click here to download…