It is all about how bad advice can lead you to a very lonely dating life.

Lets clear up a few things today.

Check out the email and then listen to today’s podcast.

Its time we got rid of our mothers advice and starting listening to what really works.

Hello David,
I first off want to thank you for all of your useful and I must say funny videos. I am sure that you get a lot of emails but it would mean more than you believe if you could help me out. As I just came across your videos on YouTube tonight.

Here it is.I am a 22 year old female and have never ever been approached by a guy. Im sure you must be thinking that I need to work on my confidence and possibly body image but it is not any of those. I am a normal girl however I am pretty shy, and I tend to be very serious when I am in public alone. Don’t get me wrong if someone comes up to start a conversation, I’m more than nice!

Moms Dating Advice

But as my mom always tells me I look too serious and look rather unapproachable, as if I’m not interested in any guy or that I am already with someone. I feel like my attitude my come off as being “bitchy” but that’s not it. I’m a serious girl and I know what I want. But obviously the way that i have been carrying myself has not been working for me

I especially am serious when I go to the gym, I have my music on and just in my own world. I have tried looking back at guys when they look at me. But I have this thing that if I look, and they look… It kind of cracks me up and I start laughing, I know its weird.. But its just from me being shy. That’s why I always take the serious approach and not look into guys eyes.

I would realllly appreciate ANY advice you can give me. There are a lot of potential guys that I was interested in but things never happened cause of me and me being shy! Especially at the gym!

Thanks a million!!!!!
Lara

Listen now below to hear my thoughts…

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Everything your mother tells you is guilt-based. Your mom’s voice that you hear in your head is always telling you that you can’t have it all.

Here’s what I say to that. What do you mean that I can’t have it all? Why should there be limits, and why should people put limits on things?

Why do parents put limits on children? You can’t have it all? Says who?

Now Junior Dont Do This Or Dont Do That!

This Universe is big. It’s abundant. It’s full of wonderful opportunities. So why can’t I have it all?

Why can’t I have the job that I want? Why can’t I make the money that I want to make? Why can’t I live the lifestyle that I want to live? Who puts all this in our heads?

A lot of us have these thoughts in our head from a very young age because of what I call “mom’s voice.” Mom says you have it all.

I remember being in a relationship one time that I thought was one of the best relationships I’d had in a long time. The problem was that something was missing — I just couldn’t really feel that actual energy with her.

I told my mom this, and she looked at me and said, “You know you can’t have it all. You can have the sex or you can have the friendship. You’ve got to choose.”

Then I looked at her and I looked at her life, and I thought, “You’re right.” I knew SHE couldn’t have it all because her life had been full of limits, self-imposed limits that she put on herself due to a limiting mindset.

I ended up breaking up with that woman, and I went out to find great women with whom I could have it all. What I ended up with was a relationship that has everything I want — sex, emotions and my best friend.

There’s nothing I am lacking in the world. I have a business that is unbelievable. I get to help people figure out their lives, create lifestyles, and meet the opposite sex. I can work from anywhere in the world as long as I have a laptop. I can go and disappear in Bali for six weeks and nobody would know. It’s just me and my laptop.

I’ve created the the most amazing life with no limits and no boundaries. So screw the talk of mom’s voice.

You can have it all. You deserve it all, and there’s no reason for you to ever again fell that you don’t or can’t have it all.

Stop the limiting beliefs in your life. Start realizing that the Universe is abundant, and that you can have everything you want and desire.

Last night was my other house guest, Cammie’s, last night in town. So as a final treat, we all went to see the show. The “we” were Me, Cammie, Sonja and Mama.

Hearing Sonja call her mother “Mama” the whole time she’s been here raised a funny thing with us. While Sonja, who is from the south, has always called her mother “Mama,” my brother and I who hail from New York have always called our mother “Mommy.”

So Mama was never a Mommy, and Mommy was never a Mama. Funny, all the southern women seemed okay with me calling it “mommy bootcamp” the other day. Must be some kind of north/south/confederate thing.

I don’t know though. Kristen is from the Midwest and tells me that they all just call their mothers “Mom.” Maybe that’s why we fought the Civil War, so we could divide the terms “mommy,” “mama” and “mom.”

By the way, Dirty Dancing was fun, long and had lots of music. It was a lot like the movie . . . and twenty years later Baby is still not in a corner.

On our way home, though, something happened. It all stems from an 82 year old man getting insanely jealous. Yes, Mama’s husband George we discovered had called her about seventeen times while we were in the play.

George in fact has been calling incessantly all week. He is convinced that Mama had been gallivanting all over Los Angeles for the last week while he’s been paying for it.

Now Mama tried to call him during intermission, but George either fell asleep for a few minutes or couldn’t get to the phone. So we get out of the show at about 9:45 pm PST (which is 12:45 am Arkansas/Louisiana time).

In the car coming home, Mama then calls George who at first feigned being asleep but then called back a few minutes later. All we hear is Mama screaming, and then we hear her yell “Bullshit!” sApparently George was still under the impression that Mama has been gallivanting all over Los Angeles on his dime and she repeated what he said to her on the phone: bullshit!

Now Mama never swears. Mommy, on the other hand, has a mouth like a truck driver. That’s probably another reason we fought the Civil War – cause northern mothers swear and southern mothers don’t.

Needless to say jealous men come in all ages. So if a man ever wrongly thinks you have been gallivanting around town, all you need to remember to say to him is “Bullshit!” No one puts Baby in a corner.

For the last week, I’ve had to keep myself from swearing while Mama has been staying with us. I guess now that I heard Mama say bullshit, it’s all fair game!

During what should have been a 30 minute ride to the show last night which actually took an hour and forty minutes, Mama suggested that I get an old Dodge like she used to have so I can ram people. You know what though? If I did, then too many people would be saying “bullshit!”

Hey hope everyone is having a great holiday weekend!!

I just got out of the water I spent the early part of the day surfing!!

Hawaii is amazing and I think I found a new sport!
Onto todays blog.
When you’re in the mall and you really want to start conversations, start them based on observations. Your observations are always a good way to start conversations.

You can start by saying, “hey, look, I need some help with the furniture,” and then observe. A client and I recently went into a Pottery Barn and did this. We listened to how she talked – in this case, the woman was Russian – so I threw in, “what part of Russia are you from?” to get her to start talking about herself.

The key is to observe, to then start the conversation, and then to listen intently. Whenever you listen, you get to pick up on all of the things that you want to be able to talk about next. Instead of thinking about what you NEED to talk about, you’ll actually be able to flow with the conversation by just listening to them.

The other person is giving you all the information you need to carry on a deep conversation with them. The more you listen to them, the deeper you can go.

When she mentions that she is from Moldavia, you can say, “Moldavia, I’ve never been there. What is Moldavia known for?” What happens is that you are creating an emotion in them, and by doing that; they are going to start to have some type of connection.

By asking her about things that she actually likes, enjoys, and is a part of, you will make her think about her home. When she thinks about her home, she’s going to want to talk to you more about that and she’s going to look at you as an emotional response. She’s going to bond with you, and think, oh my god, this guy is really interested in me – most guys aren’t really interested in ME, they’re interested in the physical aspects.

You can see when she starts talking a little bit about her language, and she gets red in the face. And then it’s like, well how much money do you have? I’ve got this magic pill – at that point, you have her. It’s done. That’s all you need to think about.

Today our video is all about getting wet with women in the rain.

Have you ever wondered what to say to a woman in the rain to get her intrigued and willing to get even more wet with you.