As I am approaching the entrance, there is a guy standing there holding one of the doors open (and blocking the entrance) as he is talking to friends of his who just drove up (thus making him face in my direction).

So here I am, clearly walking toward the door to the restaurant, and I know he sees me, but yet he still just stands there blocking the doorway and doesn’t move. I look at him and I say, “Excuse me.” He looked up like he didn’t realize there was actually anyone near him.

This kind of total lack of self-awareness when you’re out and about is the reason why so many of you have so much difficulty meeting people. Every time I coach a man on observations, I tell him to observe the world around him and then I take a look at what he tells me he sees. It’s amazing how many things a lot of guys miss.

You’ve got to take in the world around you. I’m not talking about when you’re in the middle of talking to someone so that your eyes are darting all over the place. There is a way, however, to tune into the world.

If you’re blocking a door, have a sense of self-awareness. Maybe there is someone coming and you can hold the door open and connect with another person. When you’re in the market and you’re looking at people, have a better sense of awareness and look at the big picture.

So many people don’t look at the whole big picture at all. They are so focused on whatever the project or task at hand is, that they tend to miss all the opportunities.

Self-awareness is one of the best ways to become powerful at meeting people. Self-awareness, and meeting people by really feeling their presence, is the way to truly connect with the world. Once you become in touch with everybody around you and you start recognizing emotions and opportunities, you’ll start seeing things differently and the world will become slower for you.

The world is very slow for me. When I go out and about and I talk to people, I can see the conversations before I even have them.

It’s not that I’m thinking particularly about what is going to be said, because I always remain present when I’m talking to someone. I can, however, see walking over and experiencing that conversation because I feel it. I see things so slowly, and everything is broken down for me slowly.

Can I Have A Bite Of That Apple

So if I see a woman in the market looking at apples and sniffing them in a certain way, I know she is experiencing the essence of the fruit. I know exactly to walk over there with a smile and say, “You’re really enjoying that apple.” I know I’ve tapped into her energy because I’ve paid attention to the world around me. It really does not matter what you say as long as it pertains to what is going on in her world at that present moment.

By doing that, I am able to have an amazing conversation and create an amazing connection. That is why I tell all the men and women I coach to be totally tuned into the world. It allows you to actually see conversations unfold before they happen. You don’t know exactly what the conversations are going to be about, but they are going to unfold before your eyes.

So wake up and be perceptive of everything around you. Walk around and start noticing things around you that you’ve never noticed before. Pay attention to the smaller details of life, and you will not only be more successful in dating but also in life.

A friend of mines girlfriend thought that this would be an awesome blog for all the men and women.

So she took the time to write this up for all of you.

So straight from her mouth to all of you here is the unknown massage therapist.

Thanks David and hello all of his readers.

Here is how to give an amazing erotic massage that will drive her crazy.

The only thing that tops a massage is an EROTIC sensual massage, and that is where we are going to go with this today. Erotic pleasure brought on by the sensations one feels when their skin is center focus. Your skin is the largest organ of the body with thousands of nerve endings and the touch stimulates all of your senses. Before we get into the steamy specifics there are some important things that need to be tended to. I will keep the details short and to the point on this part?:

1. Please make sure your nails have no jagged edges that can ruin your efforts to please.

2. Have your massage oil warming in a warm bowl of water so it is a pleasurable sensation (Oil is a MUST for a great massage. Water based oils are preferred, containing NO Nonoxynol-9 which can be an irritant to the skin). Keep it close by at all times because you will need it for continual lubrication for a smooth massage.

3. You may want some “edible” oil for later on your tongue can work massaging erogenous zones.

4. When you are giving a massage of any type, IMPORTANT: NEVER break contact with your partner’s skin. Once you have started the massage, keep that connection with your partner at all times.

5. Create a sensual environment from the start. Light some candles, maybe some erotic incense of your choice or some Lavender oil heating in a burner (very sensuous and very relaxing).

6. Turn the phone off. Draw the blinds. Lock the door. NO DISTRACTIONS!

7. Last but surely not least – MUSIC! You can purchase soothing spa CDs at any music store. Try to make sure it will continually play. You certainly don’t want to have to get up to take care of the music flaws.

8. TAKE YOUR TIME and BE GENTLE! So important! This is meant to be a slow process that builds into such uncontrollable sexual desire for both of you the end result will leave you both breathless.

9. You should both have a glass of water, wine, or something sweet to sip.

Lets get started shall we?

Men, your first task is to have your partner strip to her birthday suit. Have her lay on the floor face down. Put a soft blanket down. You need to be able to eventually reach every part of her body without effort. Place a sheet over her back. It is very sensual as you move down in the massage, to slide the sheet down as you work your way down. NO body part will be left untouched.

Now, take your warm oil and oil yourself up to begin with, where she can watch! You will be using your hands yes, but you will be wanting your arms and chest oiled up nicely. That alone is a turn on, so you are off to a great start only to get better as you go!

Take a good amount of oil in your hands. Rub them together to further warm it. Gently, start by gliding with smooth strokes using your whole hand, over the neck and shoulders, down and up the arms. Make your movements rhythmic in motion working together in a continual synchronization. Remember not to lose contact at any time.

Work your way down the back, now moving into longer deeper strokes. Continue this method using you body for pressure and not the strength of your sexy arms we love to see all oiled up! Lightly press your chest up against her back, letting other parts of your body lightly skim against her. The sensations of your skin brushing against her are so stimulating! Kiss her jaw lightly then her neck working down her back soft and slow. You can lick the lower back in circular motion, moving up a you lightly breath your warm breath up her spine until you get to her ear lobe where you can kiss lightly to drive her wild. By this time, I guarantee she is HOT and you are getting there if you haven’t gotten to that point yet. Haven’t lost contact yet have you? Nice!! Move back down, only now you are massaging her butt. Make sure her legs are open where you can lightly skim up and down her inner thighs. You want her squirming? Inner thighs touched sensuously will cause just that reaction. It is an involuntarily reaction of pure pleasure and stimulation!

Time to roll her over onto her back. Make sure you keep a hand on her. Is the oil plentiful? If not, grab it with one hand and lubricate her chest in between her breasts. Gently massage her shoulders working down her arms and back up. Skim over her breasts with the palm of you hand only with plenty of oil. You can stop there for a few circular motions over her already erect nipples. Does she love it? Move on then. OOHH why did you leave there! Now is when she is feeling sensations in her nipples that are dying for stimulation, as well as her vaginal area. It is feeling hot, certainly wet and yearning for you to penetrate at this point, BUT not quite yet. She is more than likely breathing hard and gasping every time you kiss her stomach down to her inner thighs. Now you should know where that G-Spot is—yes? Good, because while you have her leg up on your shoulder kissing the inner thigh, you are going to massage the outer lips of her vagina—lightly skimming. Go in and gently massage her G-spot. Now, whew it is almost more than a woman can bear! Find just the hood of her clit and GENTLY move it side to side. Experiment and watch her reactions as to where and how what you are doing is working. When you get that gasp of pleasure, stay there for awhile. Glide that other hand up to stimulate her nipples that are SOOOO in need of attention.

By now she NEEDS and WANTS and HAS TO HAVE the feeling of your erection. Just tease in and out a LITTLE in and out. Okay! Enough! Please take her hips and turn her over on her knees. Kiss her back, and fondle her nipple as you enter her vagina slowly. Keep teasing. Right now, you are hitting that G-spot again with your penis as long as you don’t go too far in.

OKAY! No more teasing! You should know how to take it from here…

There is one big Valentine’s Day lesson I want all of you to learn. It is about how to make Valentine’s Day exciting for both sexes.

How do you do that? It’s very, very simple.

Men are extremely visual. Why do you think a lot of men go out and get their girlfriend lingerie on Valentine’s Day?

Women want to feel romanced. They do not necessarily want Valentine’s Day to just be dinner reservations. They want men to come up with something creative.
So to make Valentine’s Day exciting for both sexes, both sexes have to be thinking about what the other one wants.

If you are the woman, you can have a visual surprise for the man. It could be lingerie. I heard about one woman who dressed up as cupid for her man and shot him with an arrow.

It’s all about the visual of seeing you in a different light — seeing you in something sexy. It’s realizing that you have something sexy in store. You could maybe rub oil all over each other or whatever it might be.

What you want to do is something different than what he sees on February 13th and February 15th. It’s that simple.

For the men, you need to understand that what women really want is for you to just make a little extra effort on that day. That’s all, just a little extra effort.

Instead of just buying flowers, come up with something like I talk about in the podcast. You could do a home picnic. Maybe light some candles all over the house.

It’s really all about really creating a different and romantic experience for her, so she feels like you went the extra distance that day to make her feel just a little more special. It’s not about the gift; it’s about the act of showing love. That’s really what does it for women.

So men are visual and women feel the act of love. The sexes are really very simple, but yet both sexes seem to screw up Valentine’s Day on a regular basis. Why? For no reason except ego.

The men don’t like Valentine’s Day. They think it’s too commercial; it’s a “Hallmark holiday.” They don’t see the need for Valentine’s Day because they feel like they show their love every day.

The women in turn don’t understand the need to make Valentine’s Day fun for the men. When you wake up in the morning, come out of the bathroom wearing a sexy little nightgown (instead of your old bathrobe) and put on some mood music. Do something to stimulate his visual side.

Play off each other’s wants and desires. It’s that simple. Play off each other’s innate personality traits on Valentine’s day and you both will have a more phenomenal day than you ever imagined.

Do you see a theme here? The theme is that when men get their hands on a beautiful woman, they will take as long as they possibly can with her because deep down they really enjoy touching her.

Whether they are in a relationship or are single, deep down they enjoy having the freedom to massage and touch another woman. So they will take the extra few minutes on a 60 minute massage. A woman will get an extra five or six minutes.

This isn’t the first time this has happened either. I dated someone with whom I went to get massages with and the same thing happened. The male masseuse would always give her the extra five or ten minutes, because deep down men are perverts who enjoy touching new women. Men also enjoy the freedom to use their profession to take that extra five minutes.

Now don’t misunderstand me. I’m not saying anything funky or bad happens — no one is touching the women in any sexual way. When it comes down to it, though, we are all little boys and we always like the chance to cop a feel.

So these guys are just copping a little extra feel. It might be touching her back or her neck. It doesn’t matter where, I just believe that when a man gets a beautiful woman in front of him he will always take those few extra minutes.

Don’t you think there should be some equality in massages? Is there a number we can call or some board we can address to try to lobby for equality in massages, because I want my extra five minutes! I’ve got a rockin’ bod so, really, a female masseuse should want to cop an extra feel or spend an extra few minutes on me just because I’m hot.  Unfortunately, it just doesn’t work that way. 

So women, the next time you bitch and complain about the way guys look at you or the way men are always approaching you, just realize when you’re getting those extra five minutes here and there from men because they are enjoying the beauty of who you are.

Here’s what he asked: “so you’re talking to a woman, and she starts touching you a little bit, how do you touch her back? And when is it okay to start the touch?”

Here is how I feel about touch: it has to be a comfortable way of touching. I’m not very touchy-feely in the beginning when I meet someone – it’s just not who I am.

A lot of guys tend to think that you have to touch a woman to turn her on, but if I’m not comfortable yet, I’m not going to touch her.

Even if I don’t touch her, I’m still going to turn her on in other ways to let her know that I’m interested in her. This means not breaking eye contact, smiling a lot, and making my body language very strong and powerful – I will be facing her directly and possibly breaking the comfort zone and moving in a bit closer.

I’m just not that big of a toucher. A lot of guys think that they have to start touching her to get her turned on.

If a woman touches me, I’m going to touch her back immediately. If I’m walking with and talking to her, I might touch her shoulder as we’re walking, I might put my hand on the small of her back. I might touch her hair a little bit, just playing with it naturally.

If we’re out on a great and I’m driving, I might be talking (and I talk with my hands a lot) and then just rest my hand on her thigh. Just very casually.

But I don’t think about the best time to touch her. I touch her when I feel comfortable and okay with it.

The worst thing ever is when you touch somebody and it doesn’t feel right. It’s awful when you’re touching her just because you feel like you need to escalate with her and you think that it’s going to build attraction. It’s creepy. It feels forced.

What it comes down to is that you should touch a woman when you feel comfortable enough to do it, but before you do that, you should start bringing her in a little bit.

When I’m out on a date, I’ll lean forward. If she’s leaning into me, I’ll lean into her and I’ll put my hands on the table. I’ll put them on the midsection of the table. If she puts her hands right next to my hands, I might just start touching her fingers a little bit.

But I do this when I feel really comfortable, not when I’m “supposed to.” You don’t force touch.

In order to even want her to be touched you need to become memorable.

Check out how to do this in todays video and also only 3 days left to shop for Christmas. There are some serious deals out there!

Where did the summer go?

Todays blog is perfect for this weekend.

One of the best things to do is to play tourist in your own town.

Walk around your town on a Saturday and pretend that you’ve never been there before. Why? It will force you to ask for directions and recommendations and to converse with people that you haven’t talked to before.

Maybe you can make this an adventure with somebody. Pretend like you’ve never been there before. Not only will you meet interesting people, but you will also learn things about your town that you probably didn’t already know.

Just because you have lived somewhere your whole life does not mean that you know every restaurant! It doesn’t mean you’ve been to every little shop, or explored every nook and cranny.

By acting like a curious, lost tourist, you will be able to meet more people all day long, which will build up your social network.

If you start connecting with a woman that lives in your town and you want to ask her out, you can say, “look, give me your number, I want to get together with you. I live here, but I made a pact with myself today that I was going to re-explore my town. I’ve lived here my entire life and I wanted to feel like a tourist again. And since you were nice enough to share all of your information, I would like to take you out and show you one of MY favorite places.”

She’ll ask what it is, and you can say, “surprise! Give me your number and we’ll get together next week.” That is how you do it – turn it into a game and still be honest.

Client: Have you done that before?

David: Oh yeah. It works really well. I wasn’t lying to her – I was just doing a social experiment for myself.

Also, it tells the woman that you are self-evolved. You are showing her that you are a man that actually thinks outside the box.

It takes a lot of guts to pretend to be a tourist. How many times have you been with a woman who has complained that she hasn’t seen your vulnerable side? Pretending to be a tourist is a way to show a woman your vulnerability.

All right, let’s go take a walk!

David: So here I am, sitting here, and talking to a good friend of mine who has never appeared on the blog but is an avid reader and really wanted to share her thoughts with all the men and women. Today she really wanted to help the guys out on the blog, and we’re going to talk about the art of seduction, using hot oil massage and foot massage. She’ll give you her step-by-step way of turning a woman on, just by hanging out with her and watching TV. All women need to pay attention to this as well…you can use this seduction on the men.

So let me ask you a question. You’re sitting, watching a movie with a guy, and the guy wants to seduce you. What would be the best way – instead of him just grabbing you – to seduce you when you’re watching television?

Jessica: I would say that a good place to start would be to slowly massage me, starting with my hands or the back of my neck, my head, or my feet – if you touch my feet, you’re in for sure!

David: So should the guy get some foot lotions and other things to like rub you during the movie?

Jessica: Absolutely! If he did that, I would feel like a princess, I would feel pampered; I am a sucker for massage. If you massage me long enough, you’re definitely getting some action!

David: And how long – a lot of guys don’t know how long they need to massage a woman. A lot of guys do the obligatory five-minute massage and that’s it. How long do you think is good?

Jessica: At least 35 minutes!

David: So would you say that during the whole movie it would be good to kind of massage your feet, maybe massage your legs, maybe massage your hands?

Jessica: Yeah! If you start off with some nice small caressing, and then say, “I would like to give you a massage, do you want one?” of course I’m going to say yes!

David: So they’ve given you a massage while you’re watching the TV, and now the movie is over. Now it’s time to take it to the bedroom. How would you describe the perfect way to continue this to keep you in the mood you’ve been in during the movie?

Jessica: Saying something like, “hey, this was just a warm up massage, I’ll give you the real thing, with massage oil or lotion,” in fact, David has told me about this great candle that he uses when he has a special guest.

David: The candle is called Jimmy Jane. Go to www.jimmyjane.com and check it out. It is a candle that comes in six different fragrances, and all of the fragrances are very sexual in nature.

Jessica: That sounds amazing if we were not sitting in this coffee shop right now i would jump you:)

David: Thanks and I always wondered what it would be like if you jumped me:) Ok…back to the candles here. They’re all very sexual and sensual in nature. There is a spout on the candle so you can actually pour the hot oil and wax all over your lover’s body. You light the candle, and then pour the oil on them, but the oil is not really hot when it touches them…

Jessica: Wow that is super hot. I once had a guy drip hot wax all over my body.

David: How did it make you feel?

Jessica: Hot! It’s really sexy, and sexual, and it very much put me in the mood. It was great because the fragrance of that candle that he used was very strong and it definitely helps arouse your senses – I’m getting aroused right now just thinking about it!

David: I think you were born aroused!! So you love when there’s a lot of hot oil, a lot of touching, and a lot of rubbing?

Jessica: YES!

David: You like the constant attention…

So let’s say the guy is massaging you – this is something that a lot of men don’t understand – many men will perform oral sex but they don’t really understand how to do the right kind of oral sex. It’s not just the way you lick! Share with the guys what they need to be doing with their hands in order to get a woman to climax really strong.

Jessica: You need to start off by stroking our legs at the same time, and I like it when the guy looks up at me. I also like it when… well, I don’t know what else to call it besides human vibrator! When a guy, like, hums? What would you call it?

David: You mean like vibrate your mouth?

Jessica: Yes, vibrate your mouth – that’s exactly what I’m trying to say. When a guy vibrates his mouth on me – that feels really good. And then you should slowly take one of your fingers and put it inside of me. Then give it a little bit more pressure, and do it a little bit deeper and move it around inside a bit more, to try to touch my walls and find my G-spot. That’s really hot.

David: And so let me ask you a question – there’s one hand inside, and the way the tongue is moving the other hand should be using those oils, and massaging what? Where should they be rubbing?

Jessica: All over! My inner thigh, my stomach, my hips, my breasts, my neck – and stop every once in awhile and talk to me, too. Keep using your finger, but you can talk and tell me how good I taste, and how turned on you are, and how much you want me – all of that good stuff!

David: So if a guy does all that, how much harder are you going to cum, and how much more are you going to desire him?

Jessica: Both, very much more so! I’m going to cum super-hard, and first of all, I’m going to pull you over and return the favor! I’m also going to want to come back for more… and more and more!

David: So for a guy to get really good head from a woman, he should pay attention to all of these little things. If he does this with every woman he’s with, he should be getting some amazing head, shouldn’t he?

Jessica: Absolutely. And you know, what goes around comes around – literally!

David: I agree, and I have to tell you, a lot of guys think that they’re doing it right just by licking her clit, but there are definitely different pressures you can use to lick her clit. A lot of women like things differently, as well – there are some women that love hard pressure at the top, there are some women who love it super hard and fast towards the end.

Jessica: I like it when am man tells me to spread my lips for them and hold them too.

David: Yeah that’s very erotic. Tell me why you think that’s so erotic, so men can learn.

Jessica: Well, I’ve only had one man tell me that! I think it’s naughty. I like to be bossed around, maybe not everyone would, but I do, and it’s all in the way a man says it. It really makes me feel like i am with a strong powerful man. I am not talking being mean or anything, but strong erotic talk and telling me what to do sexually is super super hot!

David: So you like being bossed around?

Jessica: Yes!

To learn more about what women really want in bed you need to check out my Girls Tell All Series Secrets Of Sex. Click here to find out even more about what they desire.

Todays video is all about how to become a master at the sly smile. Did you know that this sly smile worked on a very famous actress that I met the other day. She may have been Paris Hilton or she may have been Kate Hudson.

But only I know who she was and the smile and conversation was a trip….this works on all women whether a famous celebrity or the girl next door!

A lot of people email me all of the time, asking, “what’s a great date? I’m seeing a man or a woman, and I want to take them out on a great date.”

I have a great date idea. You want to do this on a Sunday, and just call it ‘my favorite Sunday’ – I think that every Sunday you need to create a new favorite Sunday.

If you’re by yourself, you need to do things that you really enjoy – take yourself out for a Sunday. Go out, go to a Farmer’s Market, grab some breakfast, talk to some people, and then just have an adventure. Maybe you can go shopping a bit, walk around some stores. If it’s nice out and you live by a lake or a beach, go there.

Go check out some open houses. There are always people around at open houses. Check out what houses are for sale in your neighborhood – or condos in the city, whatever it might be. Go to a bookstore, go to a library. Just take yourself out. Walk around. The weather is nice, so go walk around.

But my favorite thing to do on a Sunday – pick somebody you really want to hang out with on a Sunday, and just say you’re going to have an all-day little kid sleepover.

Start the day off by showering together. Take a shower together, get dressed in front of each other. It’s a lot of fun.

And if you don’t meet up until 12:00, you could also go out to brunch or breakfast – or even just getting takeout food and sitting in the car talking while you drive around some fun neighborhood.

That’s a fun thing to do – get a to-go box, and say you’re going to have a picnic today. And the picnic is going to be this incredibly fun drive around great neighborhoods. You can look at different houses and do things – see a couple of different neighborhoods.

That’s a great date too. Just walk around a couple of different neighborhoods, and check out the different stores and people. Talk to the merchants together.

Stop putting all of the pressure on yourself. You don’t need to put all of the pressure on yourself. Just let it flow a little bit.

Maybe you have an errand to run that day, maybe you need a new place to live. Maybe your looking for a new favorite shirt or whatever it might be. Take the person along with you and get their opinion. You just want to spend the day together, having a good time.

And then at the end of the day, with the weather being this nice, take a walk somewhere. If you live in the city, take a walk through a park. Watch the street performers. Comment on the street performers.

If you live in Los Angeles like I do, go for a hike at the end of the day, and watch the sun set. Right now the wildflowers are blooming and it’s beautiful up there. Take a hike, and go up above the city and look down.

If you live near a beach, take a walk with somebody on the beach. What a great day! After the end of that long day together, you watch the sunset. That’s a good time.

No beach? Walk around a lake. Just walk. Walk somewhere fun. If you live in New York City, take a little boat ride in Central Park. There are so many different things you can do.

If you live in the middle of the country, you guys have lakes! If you live in Michigan, you could take a walk by the lake. Look at the trees blooming together. That’s fun. There are so many fun things to do in the spring and summer times. It’s bonding. It will be a great date.

And then that night, get take-out food – it’s all about the take-out food. Pick a fun ethnic restaurant in your area and try it.

Work out together – that’s another fun thing to do together. Go to the gym together. Encourage each other to work out. It’s fun.

Go do yoga, and stretch each other. Stretching is really sexy. Learn a couple of different yoga poses. Yoga is really erotic – you can touch each other during yoga. Partner yoga is great. If you don’t know how to do it, read about it on the internet. Google it.

Go to a yoga studio, and they have partner yoga classes and stuff. It’s really fun.

And then at night, after a fun dinner, make sure you have a fun movie. That’s another great ending for that date.

Or get some good massage lotions. Foot massage – there is nothing better than rubbing a woman’s feet. You’re on your feet all day long, and all women love long, slow foot massages. Get some peppermint foot lotion from the Body Shop – it’s great, and fairly inexpensive. It tingles on the feet, so it’s a lot of fun.

Massage each other. Massaging is a lot of fun, too. Just massage one another. Get some good oils. There is this company called Jimmy Jane – www.jimmyjane.com. Go there. They’ve got these amazing candles – you light the candle and you pour the hot wax on each other. It’s not really that hot, just warm. The whole candle is like a great massage.

These are some things you need to do when you start seeing somebody; really turn it up a little bit. Have a fun sleepover. Don’t just do the same boring stuff all the time – watching TV.

Or you could break this whole blog down into individual dates. There are so many different dates on here that are fun. Activity dates, springtime-only dates – it’s bonding, it’s fun, and it takes the pressure off.

There is nothing worse than a bad date – the dates where you just stare at each other? Or the ones where you’re swapping resumes? Avoid those, and you’ll have a great time.

Todays video is all about the art of teasing and how to make her interested in you.