Status: Single.
Status: It’s complicated.
Status: Single again.

Do you know how many clients I talk to who have been broken up with via Facebook without even getting a phone call from their Facebook “ex”?
What is wrong with our society? We don’t even have closure anymore. We’re so afraid of actually having to face our partners when we’re ending a relationship that we resort to alternate, virtual ways to break up with them. Facebook. Email. Even texting! It’s ridiculous.

First, unless you’re married, real men do not post their relationship status on Facebook. Unless you’re married, it’s nobody else’s business.
And more importantly, real men do not break up over Facebook.

And real women do not post their relationship status on Facebook either. Your actual friends already know what your relationship status is.
Enough with the Facebook relationship announcements. I’m tired of it. I’m tired of constantly seeing so-and-so’s relationship status who I haven’t seen in 12 years, or so-and-so who I met at some party last summer.

I’m tired of all the bullshit.
If you’re going to break up with somebody, do it face-to-face.
At the very least, before you go out and publicly announce a relationship with someone over Facebook, have the courtesy to announce that relationship to your “significant other’s” face first so they don’t wake up one morning to their that surprise they’re suddenly in a relationship with you on Facebook—when all they thought was that you two were dating.

The only problem was, I had absolutely no clue what they said back to me, so I was stuck not knowing how to respond. Shogo had to jump in and rescue me quite a bit, and we got some great laughs out of it! But it really made me think about the observation exercises that we do at boot camps. It was really eye-opening and put me in the shoes of my clients, reminded me of how I used to think in my younger years, about not knowing what to say next, not fully understanding how to engage a person like they may as well be speaking a foreign language—and they were speaking a foreign language!

It was a lot of fun having that role reversal, having Shogo act as my coach and me being on the spot not knowing what to say. Shogo’s a terrific coach, and we really practice constructive criticism to give our clients the motivation they need to trust themselves inside and out and move forward on their own with real confidence. We don’t handle you with kid gloves, we give you tough love when we think you need it, but we’re also not the police who are here to criticize you for every little mistake that you may make. We don’t care about that. We all make mistakes, and none of us are perfect. Most of the time it’s good for us to make those mistakes.

I write for a lot of different sites, as some of you know. I blog almost every day on my site. I also write regularly for the Huffington Post and Askmen.com. And I get e-mails from readers all day long. A lot of these emails, and a lot of commenters, I call them the police. Obviously they are not the real police. They don’t wear black and white uniforms, though these people probably wish that they did. Because they sure act like the real police.

Bad Spellers Beware

There are a few types of police that I have found commenting and emailing me about my writings and the different sites that I write for. First, of course there’s the spelling police. Oh man, do they ever find those spelling mistakes! They will read an entire piece over with a fine tooth comb, skip the overall message of the piece, then they will send the one word that they believe to be misspelled. Now granted, I’m far from a good speller. Never have been, and I don’t claim to be. But a lot of these guys are even angry about it. They will usually write an e-mail that will say, “I can’t believe that your editors or you even published this piece—you call yourself a so-called expert and you misspelled a word!” So there’s the spelling police.

Then there’s the grammar police. These guys are my favorite. As you know, I write in a very casual conversational style. It’s not perfect grammar. But then again, I don’t want it to be perfect grammar. I want to convey to you guys the way I speak, and who I am. Perfect grammar is not who I am, it’s just not the tone that I take. But yet the grammar police will come and they will recite a few sentences that I wrote, then they will re-work it for me to show me how wrong I was and that this is the correct and proper way to write it.

I always found that when they do it the correct and proper way, it reads so boring. So stiff and formal. Formalities are great, but there’s a time and a place for that and it’s just not what I teach. But that’s okay, it makes the grammar police are very happy because that’s what they do, spending their days reading articles to spot the grammar mistakes, basically becoming grammar police.

The other thing I love is the “I want more” police. Now seriously, who are those people? Those are the people that go to YouTube, they get your newsletters, but they will never ever buy a single product from you. And then they tell you that you have no right to be making money off of what you do for a living, and you should be giving away everything for free. The free stuff I already give out just isn’t enough for them. 300 videos on YouTube, a daily blog, a weekly podcast, dating advice on Askmen, pieces on the Huffington Post, and probably another 100 sites where you can read more of my content for free. But it’s not enough for them. They want more. And they actually have the audacity to e-mail and tell me they’ve never bought a product and to give them more free stuff. The “I Want More” police. Ridiculous.

Then my final favorite ones are the cursing police. Yes, the cursing police. The people who, the minute you throw an F bomb out there or an S word, they bring some religious stuff and tell you that no way and no how would a God-fearing man curse like this. Or what Jesus would do me. Oh, I’m afraid of Jesus, because Jesus really cares, Jesus has nothing else to worry about than whether or not I choose to curse here and there. They tell me that I need to change my wicked and evil ways because a curse word flew off the lips.

The police are very funny. Instead of just reading and enjoying my articles, they have to find all the mistakes and critique them. That’s the only way they can be satisfied. Just like a lot of frustrated daters out there. They have to size up everybody around them to makes themselves feel better. They have to rank every woman they see based on her looks and see how she compares to them. They have to basically find all the flaws in people, find where they are better, and really judge the people around them based on their flaws.

As I’m writing this I’m still on a big high from the amazing London boot camp. We were really out about town all weekend long getting out of our comfort zones, interacting with and really engaging people all day and night.

You know it’s funny how many people will talk and talk about “playing the field.” They can spout theory and concepts on dating that they read in an e-book all day long. And they’re really good at telling other people how to do it “the right way”.

Are you one of those people that can call people out? When you’re online, can you really speak your mind and let everyone see how much you really know? With a stroke of your keyboard, can you type waterproof arguments and let others have it? Are you somebody who’s so powerful online that you’re able to say whatever you want in public forums and blogs—but then in person, you actually wouldn’t dare look somebody in the eyes and say that?

Do you know what I call those people? Keyboard jockeys. People who appear so amazing online, but when it comes down to real action, they are very weak. People who can tune right in to their computers and type away, comment after comment, thinking, “Wow, I’m bright, it feels great showing everyone how smart I am!” They’re better than everybody else online, but in person they would never talk to somebody like that.

Key Board Jockey

Here’s the deal: If your words are unbelievably strong online, but you can’t actually talk to people when you’re in person, then when you’re typing away on your computer, you’re really you’re just a keyboard jockey living through an alter ego. Isn’t it time to get out from behind the computer and be able to say things like this face to face with people? Don’t you want to be able to say in real time all the powerful things you can type away online?

Granted, you don’t want to say the ridiculous obnoxious things that some of you spout off online, but wouldn’t it be nice to look people in the eyes and actually speak your mind and really be heard with conviction and emotion in your voice? Maybe you wouldn’t be so obnoxious when you’re posting comments…

Now don’t get me wrong, I absolutely LOVE all of your comments on the blogs, it lets me know that what I write is really reaching out to you, so don’t think this is about any of you guys. But I write for several big publications and I see a lot of keyboard jockeys at work.

There’s another form of keyboard jockey, and that’s the person who goes on an online dating site, and basically talks and schmoozes, flirts like crazy, and writes heart-filled e-mails and has lengthy IM sessions. They’re really good at that, but they never actually go on dates to meet anybody because they’re too afraid to leave their computer. Sure, they can really turn somebody on with their words, but they always find reasons not to meet up. Why? Because they’re keyboard jockeys. Do you know of any keyboard jockeys, or maybe you are a keyboard jockey?

I’d like to hear from you guys today. Looking forward to reading your comments when I get to Munich!

Then a commercial came on. You know, with late night television you really don’t have a lot of great choices unless you’ve recorded something. If you start recording a lot of stuff late at night, you really are a television addict.

Anyway, there was a commercial on for Time Warner. Someone built a real estate office and they called in someone from Time Warner to talk about their business.

So who comes over from Time Warner? It’s a well-dressed guy in a suit who comes in and shakes the business owner’s hand.

I’m thinking to myself, “How come this guy never shows up to my house when I call for someone from Time Warner to come over?” I get the sweaty guy who shows me his butt crack, and basically tells me they can’t fix something.

Where’s the guy in the suit? I want him to be hooking up my Internet!

It’s funny in life how companies represent themselves publicly, and then how they do so in person. So many companies don’t walk the walk. So it’s really interesting how important it is to not just talk the talk, but walk the walk.

Now the question back at all of you.

When it comes down to dating do you walk the walk and talk the talk?

Its time to start embracing and not complaining.

I want to share this video with you today.

Great stuff.

Do you really appreciate all that you have or are you always looking for more?

What is up with people who write nasty comments about other people? Really, what is up with people like that?

Why would you have any desire to trash someone who is trying to improve themselves? I don’t care what you say about me, because I know who I am. Not only that, but people who write negative comments about someone is usually very jealous of that person.

So when it comes to someone who writes comments that spew negativity, it usually means that they are a very jealous person. They can’t do what you do, so they trash you instead of just congratulating you on your accomplishments.

They will say things like, “That guy is lame” or “That guy is a pussy” or “What a faggot!” Negative comments are often so juvenile. If you read a lot of the comments on YouTube, you would think a 12 year old is writing them. Actually I think I am giving too much maturity to these — it’s like a 5 year old is writing them.

You have no right to criticize people who are trying to improve themselves — whether they are just out approaching people or they come to a Bootcamp or in whatever way they are trying to make improvements. This is especially true for people who are willing to put themselves on video so that you can learn from their experiences.

Negativity is a disease that too many people have due to their own inadequacies. The reason why they’re negative is that they are so afraid to go out and try the things they’re being negative about on their own.

They’re so afraid to improve themselves, and would rather be an “armchair quarterback” who acts like they can do better. What is funny, though, is that they are the ones watching these videos.

I’m not negative about anybody. I truly believe that everybody’s path is their own, and and I embrace on whatever path people people choose to be.

If you’re not good at something, I am not going to make fun of you. I’m not five years old.

You can almost hear these people in their five year old whining voice saying to their computer screen, “You can’t do it, you can’t do it, na na na na na na…” I mean, come on folks.

We’re all out there trying to do better in life. Instead of being negative, support somebody and say “Hey man, that must have been tough doing that. I can’t do it and I’m gonna man up and tell you that I can’t do it.”

Start doing that, and maybe then people will come and reach out to you. If you’re negative, you’re not better than anybody else. Negative people are never better than anyone else, because anyone who is truly secure and confident and capable of doing what they are criticizing would never be so negative about someone learning how to be that same way.

Match.com. What does David have to say about match.com? Or Yahoo personals? Or any one of the number of online dating sites?

This is an open letter to all of you who are paranoid as hell to post your profile on an online dating site:

Wake up! The number one excuse that people give for not putting themselves on a dating site is that they are so afraid that someone is going to find out.

Let me tell you something: if somebody finds out, then they are on that dating site too!

Let’s say that you are in the office and that hot girl you were attracted to but afraid to talk to walks over to you and says, “hey Jim, I saw your profile on match.com.”

What are you going to do in that situation? You’re going to look at her and say, “really? I didn’t know you were on match.com too?”

She’s only going to come over and tell you that she saw your profile if she’s somewhat interested. She’s not going to come over and say, “I saw your profile on match.com, what are you doing on there?” The same thing that you’re doing on there – trying to meet somebody! You don’t need to defend yourself, because she’s on there too!

Everyone is so afraid that somebody is going to see their profile online – but if somebody recognizes you from match.com and approaches you in public, it means that they are attracted to you and want to talk to you! Otherwise, they wouldn’t say anything, they would just run and hide.

I’ve seen people walking around whose profiles on match.com I’ve seen when I’ve been doing profile work for clients. I’ve seen their pictures and their profiles, and I’ll look at them and I’ll hide – because I don’t want to talk to them! I don’t feel like walking over to them and saying, “hey, the other day I was looking at your profile on match.com, and I didn’t know that you liked to run naked through the rain.”

The great thing about posting your profile on online dating sites is that it is now socially accepted. Put your picture online – who cares? It doesn’t matter. You want people to know that you’re single.

It’s so funny that people complain all of the time about being single, but then they try to hide the fact that they are single. They go to a party and someone asks, “so, you’re single?” And they respond, “yeah, I’m single” in a depressed voice, rather than saying, “yeah, I’m single. Do you know any great people to introduce me to?”

People are so afraid to put it out there. Being on the internet is now socially acceptable. Get yourself on a dating site. Yes, I’m sure I’ll get a ton of comments and emails about how there are crazy people online – but there are crazy people everywhere!

I see crazy people online all the time. The other night we were doing an internet product – which I will release soon, it’s fantastic! It’s a two-hour audio with what is right now about a 75-page book accompanying it about how to date online. It’s my first full online dating product besides Girls Tell All: Secrets of Online Dating.

And it was great – it happened at the end of a bootcamp, we recorded the whole session with a bunch of guys, and I just walked them through how to date online.

So during this evening, I was on jdate.com – yeah I am a New York Jew, whatever! I have my profile up on a couple of dating sites because it’s fun and I learn a lot. I can write things. Most of it is research, but I have gone out on a few internet dates.

So I’m on this site, and a woman IMs me. We’re basically just chatting away, and she’s saying, “yeah, I just don’t really meet anybody online, I don’t know what it is,” while she’s chatting with me. You don’t meet anybody online because you have a bad attitude!

You have to realize that people are on there, and you can shop. It’s so great. It’s like midnight right now, and we can just shop for people online.

Patrick, what are you in the mood for right now? Would you like a brunette?

Patrick: I like blondes, personally.

David: Alright, a blonde. So why don’t we get on yahoo.com right now and go find some blondes. It’s like a convenience store for people, 24 hours a day!

You can even click and see who is online right now and find people. It’s instantaneous and fun.

For those of you who have never tried online dating, you really need to listen to this audio series that I will release soon. In two hours of audio, I’m going to tell you all the ins and outs of online dating, and you’ll have a blast online.

Online dating is like going to 7-11 – for people!

Todays video is all about how to have fun when meeting the opposite sex. Stop chasing and being so uptight when you meet the opposite sex.