Why is the wet spot on the bed always in the spot that you cuddle on? Somebody is going to be spooned directly into that wet spot. It happens. The question is, if you’re the man, do you man up and say, “You know what, honey, with all my body hair, I’ll sleep in the wet spot all night long. No problem.”

Or, do you slowly push her directly into the wet spot so you don’t have to deal with the dampness all night long? You can try to use towels to cover up the wet spot, but that never seems to work. For some reason or another, the towel always starts to itch. I never understood why, but it always does. Most of us don’t have gigantic beds, so somebody WILL be touching that wet spot. The question is, who deserves it?

Here’s my wet spot rule: If you didn’t get her off a couple of times, meaning, he didn’t go down on her, didn’t give her a big orgasm, didn’t get her to come during sex, then the man deserves to lay in the wet spot. You don’t deserve to be sitting on the dry side. You didn’t work hard enough.

But if she was lazy in sex, didn’t do anything but lay there, no foreplay at all, and he just did all the work and banged her left and right, she had a great time, he went down on her but she didn’t go down on him, then what? Damn right – he should spoon her and pull her directly into that spot and you let her little soft smooth body get cold all night long. That’s my rule.

The one who does more in bed for the other person deserves the wet spot pass. The one who was lazy that night? That’s right, you get to find out how long it takes until that wet spot dries.

But in relationships, the sex can get monotonous. Daily life gets in the way and everything else just kind of fades into the background. Do you ever get to a point in a relationship where you just feel like you’re stuck? You’re not hearing each other. You’re not connecting each other emotionally. You always know what you need when you hit that point in relationships.

What you need to do is get away from everything. Kids. Work. Bills. Day care. Diaper care. Whatever it is. Even if you have no family, you just need to get away from work, from your friends, texting, iPhones, all the distractions in life. You need to go on a fuckation.

That’s right: a fuckation. What’s a fuckation, you ask? It’s where you do nothing for 48 hours but fuck each other. You book a nice hotel online, and you get out of town for the weekend. Actually, you can do this anywhere. You don’t even need to get on an airplane or even leave town, really. You can just do this on the other side of town. You drive a half hour away. You pick a point. Say, “Honey, we’re going to drive for 30 minutes and once that 30 minutes is up we’re going to exit the first right and we’re going to find a hotel. We’re going to check in, and we’re going to do nothing but stay in bed, fuck, order room service, and have fun.

It’s called a fuckation because sometimes you just need to leave everything else behind and reconnect on the most basic level. Sometimes you need to stop all of life’s activities and really take the time to do nothing but enjoy one another without distractions.

So here’s what you need besides a hotel and a vehicle to get yourselves there: you need to bring some body lotions, some massage oils, some candles to set the mood. Lingerie too, even though it’s all about staying naked for 48 hours. No clothing allowed. The only thing you’re packing in your overnight bag is a toothbrush and clothing that you can return in. Actually, screw that. Don’t even pack that. Just return in the same clothes you wore on the way there.

The only things you pack in your overnight bag are fuckation toys. Adult toys. Bring a vibrator along, handcuffs, whatever floats your boat. Try out something new you’ve never tried before. Scented oils, bubble bath soaps, foot lotions for foot massages. Maybe a book you can read to each other while taking a bath. Maybe some Netflix DVDs to watch while you’re resting between marathon lovemaking sessions.

Hot Vacation Sex

Order as much room service as you want. Really spoil yourselves. But if you order food, make sure you include food that you can eat off each other. Order strawberries. Order chocolate syrup. Maybe bring a few bottles of wine or champagne. Maybe some liquor if you guys like doing shots—but if you do shots, make sure they are body shots off of each other. Try some tequila body shots, they’re great fun. You put a lime in your partner’s mouth and sprinkle a little bit of salt on your favorite part of their body. Lick the salt off their body, take the shot, and then suck the lime right out of their mouth.

Be creative on your fuckation. It’s all about letting loose and having sex. It’s all about reconnecting, having a blast with each other, and realizing that you don’t need anything else except for each other to keep you happy and satisfied. So let your imagination run wild. And no phones! Granted, for those of you who have kids you need to check up on, you can do that. But that’s it, and you can do so only after a nice, long love session.

If you’re stressed out, your relationship isn’t going that great and you’re losing touch with each other, you need to take a break and get away. So suggest to your partner that you need to take a fuckation. Tell them what the ground rules are. Make each lovemaking session last. Better yet, think of it as one long 48-hour love session. Take the time to massage one another from head to toe. Massage each other’s toes and fingers; take the time to get to know each other’s bodies all over again. When you slow things down and dedicate the time to one another, you’re going to discover each other in brand new ways. By the time you get home—in the same clothes you came in—sex is going to be far more interesting and a lot more fun, because you will have learned so many different things about each other sexually and some new exciting ways to turn each other on.

Let me ask you a question. Let’s say that this weekend, you had two options.

Option one is hanging out with your usual group of friends — talking the usual talk, dissing each other’s relationships, talking about frustrations in trying to meet people, and really just having the same old conversations over and over.

Option two is to spend 48 hours with someone you were really attracted to — emotionally and physically — and really desire. The catch is that this person is someone you’ve never met. Let me explain further.

This person would be someone you’ve not only never met, but the type of person you always dreamed of meeting. They would be the type of person who turns you on in every way — sexually, emotionally, mentally — and gives you goosebumps. They are the type of person you would want to keep forever and ever.

Of course, like many things, option two has a catch…

That person is going to be moving permanently to Siberia after they spend that 48 hours with you. They need to disappear in the wilderness and never be seen or heard from again.

Flight 40 To Siberia

You of course would be disappointed, because over the course of that weekend you would get super attached. You met the perfect person and you wanted more.

So what would you do? Which option would you pick?

You would be able to spend a weekend with that perfect person and experience all the amazing feelings you’d be open to feeling, but would you be okay with the ending?

What would you really do?

I’ve asked this question to a lot of people, and their answer is always the same. Of course they would pick option two, but they are going to be devastated at the end.

The reality is, though, that they would not be devastated at the end — and neither would you. The reality is that you would grow from that experience. You would learn so much from that experience.

You’re going to experience something you’ve never experienced before. You’re finally going to have that “benchmark” where you know what it feels like to truly let go with no expectations, no issues and no outcome driving you.

For those of you who chose option one, you’re living your life full of fear. The point of life is to experience and to be present every day. The more you experience, the more you feel and the more open you become. The more you do this, the greater your life is going to be.

If this is your first reaction then you are a man who is controlled by his little man downstairs.

Women read this energy and run for the hills.

Men always ask me how to escalate sexually within the first few minutes of meeting women.

They think they need to touch or to talk sex to get a woman going.

What I am going to share with you today,is how to engage all of her senses and how to get your mind in control of you and not your penis in control of you!

Since Sonja is from New Orleans, I of course not only get to watch the show but also get full-blown commentary during the entire time. I not only get to learn about these new characters. I get background information, history of the streets and what happened during Katrina. It’s like getting two shows for the price of one — one on television and one in my living room.

Anyway, there was a really funny episode about a guy celebrating his girlfriend’s birthday. They are both musicians. He buys her a great bottle of wine for her birthday, and wants to drink it in the morning.

You’ve got to love a musician’s life. The minute they wake up, he looks at her and says “I got you a birthday present.” Then he hands her the bottle of wine. She says, “No, let’s drink it later.”

I love the 20′s. I mean, people in their 20′s are just great.

So of course what happens next is that they start fooling around. The 20′s are so great because they are in that time when they can get drunk or screw all morning long.

Later they were on the street, and a musician comes over and tells the girl that he really wants her to play with his band that night at a private event. She then asks the musician if the boyfriend can play with them too. The musician says he already has someone playing the piano (the instrument the boyfriend plays), but says the boyfriend is welcome to come and enjoy the food and the music.

What happens next is so typical of people in their 20′s. The boyfriend of course goes to the show. He has conversations and eats all the food.

Eventually, and even though the girlfriend was keeping watch as to where he was, the boyfriend leaves the show pissed off. Leaving like that is something you do in your 20′s. He left because he was jealous and pissed off that his girlfriend had a gig and he didn’t, and because he saw her talking to some guy of which he didn’t approve.

So the next scene shows him drinking the bottle of wine he gave her for her birthday alone in their apartment. It’s such a douchebag 20-something guy move to do.

How do I know? I’m sure I probably did that when I was in my 20′s. So I laughed during that whole scene.

Let me tell you something. If it’s your significant other’s birthday and they invite you to something that is really special to them, then you celebrate the fact that they were recognized. I don’t care what you had otherwise planned — taking them out for a really nice dinner or to the top of the Empire State Building or whatever.

You can do your special celebration afterwards or even on another day. What I teach over and over again is to be present in the moment. Realize in that situation that the “new thing” that came up is actually another special celebration and just enjoy it.

It’s amazing how many guys in their 20′s act like the guy in this show acted. Actually, it’s not just guys. I know a lot of girls are reading this and snickering as you are thinking that you never act like this, but I have seen a lot of women in their 20′s act this way too.

This is a 20′s disease. It’s called “if things don’t go according to plan I am going to throw a temper tantrum like I’m five years old.”

For any of you who acted like this in your 20′s, I hope you are not doing it in your 30′s and 40′s. If you are, you really are just a man-child or a woman-child

It’s amazing what a good orgasm will do. I’m not talking about self-administered orgasms.

To tell you the truth, those kind of orgasms are lame. They really are.

It doesn’t take much skill to plug a vibrator into the wall, put it on your clit and fifteen seconds later scream “Ohhhhhh!” as you come. Bravo! Let me give you a standing ovation. Also, to the men out there who are beating off in the middle of the day over the sink with hand lotion they stole from their grandmother, I say get real!

Those are not the kind of orgasms I am talking about here. What I am talking about is the sex you have in a relationship that makes the fights go away.

Now, I’m also not talking about taking off your clothes, humping and getting each other off (basically masturbating inside each other). That is not what sex is all about.

Granted, I’ve had relationships in which the sex was really just about masturbating inside each other. I’m sure all of you have.

What I am talking about here is being connected to each other’s needs, wants and desires leading up to sex. That means tuning in to how your lover needs to be taken.

Are you someone who just needs to be thrown down on the ground in a testosterone-driven rage and be taken while they look in your eyes? Are you someone who needs verbal foreplay? Whatever it is, we are all very different sexually.

We all love the act itself. Who doesn’t love the warmth and the moisture and the heat of that whole experience?

I remember when I was a baby what my first words were to my Mother. I said, “Wow, it’s so warm in your amniotic sac.”

When I slid my way out, I couldn’t wait to get back in. It took me eighteen and a half years to get back inside.

The bottom line here is to know how you are wired sexually. What do you need the most in your lover? This is something I want all of you to think about today.

Do you need someone to seduce you? Do you need someone who will look in your eyes and talk dirty to you in order to turn you on?

Are you someone who likes to get raw and dirty, and just be taken? You want to have dinner, go home and have your lover f*^k the shit out you?

Write down whatever it is that you want and need. This is very important and something that a lot of people overlook.

Like your good friend Dr. David says, “an orgasm a day keeps the Tyson away.” It keeps the fighting away.

The only issue, and what’s important, is how we get to that orgasm. You may not be aligned with somebody sexually; they may be a totally different sexual type than you are. In that situation you might be having great sex, but it doesn’t mean you are being fulfilled.

So it’s really important before you get into a relationship (or even if you’re in one already), that you are straight about who you are sexually. Be honest about who you are and what you want. This is so important because once you start having sex with someone, it’s very hard (no pun intended) to make changes.

See everyone tomorrow!

Why not? Sunday is a great day to stay in bed all day and have amazing sex.

So how do you make this happen?

Ahhhhh . . . you must watch today’s video to find out.

You think that is good? CHECK THIS OUT!

There is one big Valentine’s Day lesson I want all of you to learn. It is about how to make Valentine’s Day exciting for both sexes.

How do you do that? It’s very, very simple.

Men are extremely visual. Why do you think a lot of men go out and get their girlfriend lingerie on Valentine’s Day?

Women want to feel romanced. They do not necessarily want Valentine’s Day to just be dinner reservations. They want men to come up with something creative.
So to make Valentine’s Day exciting for both sexes, both sexes have to be thinking about what the other one wants.

If you are the woman, you can have a visual surprise for the man. It could be lingerie. I heard about one woman who dressed up as cupid for her man and shot him with an arrow.

It’s all about the visual of seeing you in a different light — seeing you in something sexy. It’s realizing that you have something sexy in store. You could maybe rub oil all over each other or whatever it might be.

What you want to do is something different than what he sees on February 13th and February 15th. It’s that simple.

For the men, you need to understand that what women really want is for you to just make a little extra effort on that day. That’s all, just a little extra effort.

Instead of just buying flowers, come up with something like I talk about in the podcast. You could do a home picnic. Maybe light some candles all over the house.

It’s really all about really creating a different and romantic experience for her, so she feels like you went the extra distance that day to make her feel just a little more special. It’s not about the gift; it’s about the act of showing love. That’s really what does it for women.

So men are visual and women feel the act of love. The sexes are really very simple, but yet both sexes seem to screw up Valentine’s Day on a regular basis. Why? For no reason except ego.

The men don’t like Valentine’s Day. They think it’s too commercial; it’s a “Hallmark holiday.” They don’t see the need for Valentine’s Day because they feel like they show their love every day.

The women in turn don’t understand the need to make Valentine’s Day fun for the men. When you wake up in the morning, come out of the bathroom wearing a sexy little nightgown (instead of your old bathrobe) and put on some mood music. Do something to stimulate his visual side.

Play off each other’s wants and desires. It’s that simple. Play off each other’s innate personality traits on Valentine’s day and you both will have a more phenomenal day than you ever imagined.

She comes out of the bathroom smelling all pretty and sexy, and the two of you embrace. Something, however, is wrong.

Why are you feeling this way right now?

You think, “Not now! I am about to have some great sex with this hot, sexy woman. Why do I feel so not right?”

Let’s reverse the sex roles for a second. Women of the blog, picture yourself as the one who is feeling so off and strange when contact is made.

Do you want to know why this happens?

Then click here and listen to today’s podcast.

Oh, and one last thing…

No need to dim the lights when I am talking to you!

Click here to listen now:

Also, CLICK HERE to listen to what happens in the situation where this scenario I layed out in the beginning ends in that amazing sex you were anticipating.

It’s called approach anxiety. It’s a made up disease based on fear and nothing else.

All of you need to be approaching each other and hooking up. The world is a much better place when we are all enjoying each other, having conversations and, of course, having sex!

Are you ready to end your approach anxiety once and for all? Are you ready to learn how to be able to communicate with anyone you see, so you will no longer be dateless and lonely?

I have just completed a product called “Become A Master Communicator” that I will be releasing publicly in a few months that shows exactly how to make all this happen. Ladies, this product will help you as well.

Even though the product won’t be available to the public for a few months, I am giving the people on my list a special *sneak peek* of this product NOW (along with a special offer as well).

If you want to get a sneak peek of this product and you’re not a member of my list, go to the top of this page and sign up in the box.

Also, because there is no podcast today on this “podcast Wednesday,” I am going to do something special for all of you next week. I am going to give you a double dose of podcasts! Yes, there will be two podcasts during next week. They are my Christmas gifts to you. Be sure to check in to catch those . . .

Now on to today’s topic that will inspire you to want to get rid of your approach anxiety and start really interacting with the opposite sex . . .

Do you know what I love about traveling? When you get into a traffic jam inside the airport.

Why are there traffic jams inside the airport? It’s because people don’t know how to drop people off. It’s really funny.

Why don’t people say their goodbyes before they get into the car to drive to the airport? So you drive twenty minutes to the airport. You have to wait until you get there to hug, kiss and say goodbye for ten times?

You could have said goodbye twenty minutes earlier and it wouldn’t have been any different. Actually, had you said goodbye at home, it could have been a much better goodbye.

You could have had a proper sendoff having wild and amazing sex. Now that is a great goodbye! It’s a lot better than standing at the airport staring at each other and hugging.

Instead of spending twenty minutes doing that, just get up twenty minutes earlier and bang your brains out before you leave. That way, you will get to the airport and drop the person off immediately, because you’re tired and you want to go home and shower.

Otherwise you are left with the traffic jam in the airport. It is caused by people who were rushing all day long to get to the airport who, once they arrive there, will decide that they need to spend five or ten minutes on the curb saying goodbye. They think, “Even though I’m really stressed out and I need to get to my gate on time, this goodbye is so important.”

So here’s a note to all the travelers who are being dropped off by their man (or their woman). Bang your brains out early that morning! Have a great orgasm (or two or three if you can climax quickly).

Do that and the goodbye will be so much better, because all day long you’ll be thinking about that wonderful feeling you had (instead of some quick two second kiss).

Come on, tell the truth. After a kiss like that, the minute you get in the car and start sipping your coffee, you will forget all about it. Amazing morning sex you will not so quickly forget.

So that’s my new goodbye for people heading to the airport. You bang your brains out like a maniac, and then you will be totally relaxed on the plane.

You will also be relaxed when you’re sitting in traffic in the airport with all the idiots who didn’t bang their brains out before they left. You won’t even care because you’re feeling good.

If you are dropping off your mother instead of a lover, you can still do a better goodbye before you leave for the airport. You say goodbye to her twenty minutes before you have to get in the car to leave. You hold her hand the entire time.

If you are dropping your boss off at the airport, you do not bang his (or her) brains out that morning. You just high-five him (or her) and say, “Have a great trip. Get out. You’re going out of town, so I’m going to play golf and goof off for the next five days!”