I’ve been working out my entire adult life, and I want to share a funny — but true — story with you about how I started working out. It’s going to sound goofy to a lot of you.

There was actually one movie that pushed me to want to start working out. It wasn’t Rocky. It wasn’t Dirty Dancing.

It was the movie Flashdance. Yes, I actually went to see the movie Flashdance when it came out.

I watched all the dancing scenes, noticed the way the bodies were totally toned and ripped, and it motivated me in a very bizarre way. Maybe it was all the booze I drank in college, but I remember arriving home after seeing that movie and suddenly started to pound the weights.

I haven’t stopped since. Give or take about five pounds, I’ve basically been the same weight my entire adult life.

I consistently work out. I do cardio four days a week. I lift weights three days a week.

I used to do yoga before I blew out my back. I have now found that being tighter actually keeps me together better.

A lot of people have trouble starting to work out. You gain five or ten (or twenty or thirty) pounds, and you look at yourself in the mirror not liking the way you look.

What a lot of people do in that situation is to head straight for the microwave and eat even more. Others will sit on the couch and say, “I’m going to start exercising next week.”

Here is the truth. If you don’t like the way you look and if you can’t embrace your own body, then nobody you date will either. That is why I call this “The Dating Diet,” because it is all about you feeling great about yourself and your body when you’re dating.

There’s nothing that turned me off more when I was dating, than when a woman insisted on making the room completely dark the first time she got naked with me. I would be looking forward to seeing her naked body, and all she wanted to do was leave the room completely dark because she felt insecure about her body.

How you feel about yourself is so important. So if you feel you’ve been slacking, you need to push yourself.

Start going to the gym, and do just 20 minutes of cardio in the beginning. Then the next week, move up to 25 minutes of cardio, and increase to 30 minutes of cardio the week after that.

Just get started. Whatever you choose to do, start slow and build up.

If you’re not feeling great about yourself and feel uncomfortable at the gym at first, then pick a time to go when there are fewer people there until you feel more comfortable.

Write down all of your excuses. “It’s too cold right now to go to the gym.” “I’m too comfortable on this sofa, and don’t want to miss my favorite shows.” “I didn’t get up early enough today.”

Write down your excuses, and realize that all of them are just that — excuses. You must be dedicated.

Now I’m going to ask you to do something that will really be a challenge for a lot of you, but I want to push you a little bit. Stop reading this blog, go to the bathroom, get undressed and look at yourself from all angles in the bathroom mirror.

What do you like about your body? What do you dislike about your body? What you change about your body? What do you need to accept about your body?

If there are parts of your body you don’t like that you can change through diet and exercise, it’s time to commit to work toward getting those body parts to look how you will love them. If there are other parts of your body that you don’t like that weights and cardio won’t change, then it’s really important to embrace and love who you are.

The other night I was kind of just sitting around, and I started reminiscing a little bit. Then I started thinking to myself, “God, it’s amazing.” I read all your posts on the blog and on YouTube. I see all of you struggling so much either trying to meet someone, to work on aspects of your relationship or to work on aspects of yourself. What I realized was that I think a lot of you are missing the point.

Here’s the story I want to share with you. When I was nineteen years old, I was really skinny. I know I’m not exactly the bulkiest guy in the world right now. At nineteen, though, I was really thin. I was a ‘tall drink of water’ — tall, lean and thin.

Then I saw the movie Flashdance. As most of you know, Flashdance was a hot, sexy dance movie. After seeing it I thought to myself, “I really want to be in that type of shape where I can just rock it at all times.”

The minute the movie ended, I went into the basement of the house I was renting in college and I started working out. I haven’t stopped since that day.

I have been working out since I was nineteen, and I’m now 47 years old. I’ve been working out consistently for 28 years.  

When I was in my 20s, I was a big guy. I was bulky, big around the neck, and had big arms and shoulders. Now, at 47 years old, I’m more lean again.

The one thing that will never change about me is being in shape. I will always be in shape.

Why? Because I work at it every day. Every single day I do something.

last night a took a long walk on the beach after we had dinner. The day before that I did weights.  Tomorrow I’m probably going to go for a bike ride.  The day after that I’m probably going to go do some more weights, maybe do a little bit of stretching and Pilates.  

No matter what it is, every day I’m doing something. It might be for half an hour, 45 minutes or an hour. It doesn’t matter. The reason why I do it every day is because I believe there is no reason for me not to look good, and not to feel good about who I am and what I’m all about.

Why should I look flabby? Why should my woman look at me and think to herself, “God he looked so much better six months ago. Why doesn’t he look that good now?”

That’s the message I want to get through to all of you. The message is that if you want to achieve goals, you’ve got to painfully do something every day.  

Do I enjoy working out?  Some days I hate it.  Do I enjoy taking a long walk? Sometimes I love it, but other times I just don’t want to do it.  

I do it not only to look good, but also because it makes me feel good. I like to feel tight. I like to feel ripped. I like to feel my body.

I don’t like to feel flabby in any way. I wouldn’t want to see myself with a big belly.

Is this all ego? There’s probably a little bit of ego involved, but a big part of it is the way it makes me feel. I feel great.  

All of you need to realize that in order for you to get good at something, you’ve got to do the work. You’ve got to drag your ass out there every single day. You’ve got to drag yourself out there even on days you don’t want to drag yourself out there.

You have no choice but to drag yourself out there and get things done.  If you want to become good at something, then you’ve got to do it every single day (including on days you don’t want to do it).

So even when it’s cold or raining, you’ve got to get to the gym or get out there and meet people or do whatever it is that you have set as a goal for yourself. If you want to become a good conversationalist, for example, you’ve got to talk to everybody . . . and you’ve got to do it every day.

So many of you will get so frustrated — so painfully frustrated — while you’re working on a goal. It will drive you up the wall. It will drive you crazy. You’ll get so frustrated, it’s ridiculous.

You’ve got to work through those frustrations.  I was so proud when I had that realization the other day that for the last 27 years I’ve worked through my frustrations and therefore can look in the mirror today knowing I’m in as good shape now as i was in at age nineteen.

Do you know how that makes me feel? I’ve got a herniated disc. You would never know it by looking at me . . . ever. I move well. I’m strong. That makes me feel great!

I’ve got a blown shoulder.  I can move through that pain, and I’m strong as can be.  

How about getting blown off by a woman once in a while. That is a frustration that I know many of you face. All of you can blow right through all that stuff. I know you can. I know every one of you can.

You’ve just got to persevere. You’ve just got to drag yourself out there every day and work on the things you need to work on. You can do it. I know you can do it.

Today’s video will help you understand women’s intent.