I have something I’m working on right now that is one of my biggest fears, and which is challenging me more that I have ever before been challenged. It is something I work on every single day, and something I kick myself in the ass about every single day.

So let’s talk about fears today. Let’s find out how to overcome any fear — whether it’s approach anxiety, fear of commitment, fear of having children or whatever it might be.

Everyone is in a different place in their life. Everyone has different fears.

I remember when I used to have a fear of flying. I was terrified to fly. It was one of my worst nightmares.

I always thought the plane was going to crash. I thought that turbulence meant that the plane was about to fall apart. During much of my 20′s I didn’t even travel, because I thought I was going to die in a plane crash.

Now I am addicted to traveling. How did that shift take place?

I started traveling. I started getting on airplanes. I started relaxing. I started listening to good music. I started thinking positive thoughts.

When I got on an airplane, I would meditate. It became my quiet time.

Now I actually find being on an airplane to be one of the most meditative things I can do. Granted, the seats hurt my ass really badly. My brain, however, really just loves to zone out on a plane and relax. It’s one of my top ten favorite things to do.

So how do you get over a fear that you have? You think positive things. You envision the outcome.

If you have a fear of approaching women, then envision what it feels like to be able to approach any woman you want. If you have a fear of having kids, then visualize how amazing it’s going to be to hold your son or daughter for the first time. If you have a fear of commitment, visualize how incredible it will be to get really deep with somebody.

It’s all about visualizing my friends. Visualize all the beauty of what it’s going to feel like to get there (wherever the “there” is relative to your fear). Then when you’re on the journey to get there, you will hold on to the beauty of that vision the entire trip.

I talk more deeply and in detail about how I overcame all my own fears. Click to find out how to get rid of approach anxiety and any other fears today.

For anyone who doesn’t know what a “kegger” is, let me give you the quick description. A kegger is when a bunch of high school kids sit around drinking beer out of a keg, get drunk and act like idiots.

I remember that all the hot girls were going to be at that party, and how badly I wanted to go. Despite this, I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t get myself to go. I had so much fear and anxiety about it, and I couldn’t figure out why.

When my buddy John called me around 7:00 pm to let me know he would be picking me up in an hour to go to that party, I told him I couldn’t go. I didn’t tell him that I had too much fear and anxiety to go. I told him the excuse that I had spent the entire day thinking about and creating, that my Mom wasn’t feeling well so I had to stay home to take care of my sister and brother.

I told him how much it sucked that I couldn’t go. I really sold it, and John believed me. I remember getting off the phone and thinking what a great job I did selling that excuse.

How many times have you sold excuses? You get invited to something, but you create an excuse not to go because of your lack of self-confidence, your lack of social confidence and your mindset.

How many times have you spent the entire day working up the perfect excuse to blow off a social event to which you were invited? What is funny is that when you do this, you will always check in the next day with your friends to see what you missed.

Then, because the mind is very funny in the way it works and tricks itself, you think “Oh man, I could’ve gone to that party. I should have gone. Next time I’m going to do it.”

The truth is that the next time you are going to come up with another excuse. The same thing will happen the time after that.

We make excuses in life because it’s too hard to face our fears. As human beings, we love to make excuses. Facing our fears means we have to leave our comfort zone.

When you get out of your comfort zone, it by definition means that you are going to be uncomfortable. As human beings, we always want to be comfortable.

That is why television is so popular. Watching television allows you to escape into a different world.

The Internet is another great escape. If you ever read comments people post on Internet sites, people are as ballsy as can be because they can be their own “alter ego” and say what they would never have the guts to say in real life.

In order to overcome your fears and excuses, you must go out and do something that takes you out of your comfort zone. There is no way around it.

For some of you, that might mean approaching ten women a day. For others of you, that might mean going out on a date with someone you’ve always wanted to ask out on a date but never have.

if you don’t do something every single day that gets you out of your comfort zone, you’re just going to remain comfortably numb (as Pink Floyd so aptly put it) for the remainder of your life. Let me tell you, time goes by really fast.

That was 31 years ago I made that excuse to my friend John to avoid going to that high school party. While I have obviously gotten over those fears, there are times in my life that I will still bail out of things with some other stupid excuse.

I want you to write down on a piece of paper the answer to this question: What is your biggest enemy?

When it comes to meeting women, a lot of guys are under the impression that their biggest enemy is timing. They will say that they haven’t met women because they haven’t been invited to the right parties or something similar to that.

This kind of thing is surface stuff, and it is not your biggest enemy. Your biggest enemy is that eight pound thing you carry between your shoulders called your head.

Your head is your biggest enemy because it is what does not allow you to accomplish about 90% of the things in life you want to accomplish. I’m not just talking about meeting women.

When it comes to meeting women, your success comes down to your belief. You must truly believe that you are amazing and are a gift. You must truly believe that any woman who meets you would benefit from your amazing tenderness, your amazing personality, your character traits and everything else about you.

If you don’t truly believe all of this, then it doesn’t matter what you do or what you memorize because you head is disconnected from your heart. When your head is disconnected from your heart, it’s all over.

Have you been in an argument with someone in which your head thinks and over-thinks things so much that you can’t get back into your heart? That will stop whatever constructive dialog you’re having at that point. Your heart and head need to both be involved at all times.

Your head can over-rationalize things. Your head can over-think things.

This is what is going on every time you can’t get yourself to approach a woman. All you are thinking about are the fears and excuses in your head.

What does your heart want to do in this situation though? Your heart wants to go and experience another person. We’re all about experiencing other people – their feelings and emotions. The problem is that our head can play tricks on us.

This does not just happen in the area of meeting women. This happens in relationships and it happens at work.

How many of you had an intent to start the new year really kicking ass at work. Then you get your first rejection and, all of a sudden, you are right back in the same mindset you were in before the new year.

You must get you head aligned. The old saying “get your head on straight” is really important and true. Probably about 90% of the people in the world are walking around with their head on backwards or sideways.

Can you imagine if your head actually could rotate all the way around and how that would feel? You would be walking down the street and would be passing some people with their head facing backwards while others would have their head tilted to the side.

Nobody would walk around with their head on straight except those who truly believe in themselves, and who don’t care about what others think and feel.

I’m not talking about being cold, because of course we all care how others feel. Deep down, however, we all need to maintain a great sense of self. When you’re true to yourself, you’ll be able to do anything you want.

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You take things out of context when you read, and if you do it while you’re reading then I know you do it when you’re listening. My blogs are short, but if you want to get the whole message then you have to read them from beginning to end.

I posted a blog the other day that was titled “We’re Pregnant!” I got congratulatory messages all day long on Facebook, on the blog and in my email inbox. If you’d actually read even the first four lines of that blog, however, you would know that Sonja and I aren’t not pregnant and that the blog was about how men use the phrase ‘we’re pregnant.’

Enough about that blog, except that it’s interesting how life is all about perception. Some of you perceived that my girlfriend and I were pregnant.

It was probably the same group of people who don’t listen to what people say, and have difficulty transitioning into deeper, more meaningful conversations with people to whom they are attracted. Life is all about perception, but you’ve got to listen and communicate everything in order to get what you want.

It’s funny. I have someone who works for me who wants to know why they aren’t making more money. It’s not that I’m not paying them well. It’s that they are not doing what they are supposed to be doing (and need to be doing) to earn more.

If they’re not on Skype during the day, I can’t get a hold of them when I need to do so, and they are on the bottom of the sales numbers every month, then I will perceive them as lazy. I will perceive them as not having a good work mindset.

Now, if you want to masturbate the day away, that’s your business. I’m not talking about physically masturbating (although some people do). I am talking about mental masturbation.

People who don’t take action often times are mental masturbators. They’ll mentally masturbate about having great sex, losing that weight, being able to approach the opposite sex, or whatever it may be.

Mental masturbation is no different than physical masturbation. You just get off in a very different way.

You think about the big home you’re going to have, the car you’ll be driving or taking over a business. In reality, though, you’re still the same person who is getting nothing done and who has the same poor work habits.

Life is full of fears, and unfortunately some of us spend more time mentally masturbating away our fears instead of actually doing something about them. It’s no different than masturbating with your hand or a vibrator. Think about it.

Whenever you get off alone, it’s never even close to how good it is to get off with someone with whom you’ve connected. In a work context, whenever you actually accomplish a goal it is always so much better than mentally masturbating it. Approaching actual women and learning how to be confident doing will always feel better than mentally masturbating all the women you want to approach.

Eventually you have to overcome your fear and just do these things. I am a doer, not a talker.

I am not attracted to talkers. I’ll coach them, but I don’t have any friends in my life who are talkers. I surround myself with doers.

With whom do you surround yourself — doers or talkers? Do you surround yourself with a bunch of mental masturbators so you can stroke each other all day long and never get to your destination?

That’s all for this topic. Speaking of stroking, though, today’s video will tell you how to stroke women so they’ll climax like never before. Ahhh…your mind is so dirty right now, but the sexual technique I’m going to show you will stroke women in a place you would have never thought of…

Have a great day!