Last night, I recorded a great talk with Obi about how quickly the year is flying by and how important it is to really get clear about what you want to accomplish.

We came to the conclusion that most people allow the year to fly right by them because they are afraid of really going deep into themselves and asking those important questions:

What do I really want?

How can I do more amazing sh*t?

How do I become the person that attracts the relationships that I deserve?

This week has been really hectic, I’ve been on a lot of coaching calls with clients, and few calls with some of you blog readers from all over the world as well. Just a lot of guys I’ve talked to this week.

There’s one common thread that runs through almost everybody. And that fear is what’s commonly called APPROACH ANXIETY. The moment you see somebody who you’re attracted to, you make a determination that you’ll go talk to them. But then the fear kicks in. Well, now you’re stuck in a situation where you CAN go up and talk to them, you’ve got no excuse not to, but you’re afraid of what might happen. Actually, you have no idea what might happen, and that’s what makes it so scary.

It’s like you get this crazy sensation in your stomach, your mind starts racing thinking all sorts of ridiculous thoughts, thinking of any excuse in the book why you should not go up and start talking to this person or just say “Hi, how are you today?”

So how about this for an invention: Anti-Rejection Specs.

Just like those cardboard X-ray Specs you used to get in the old comic books, you could put on these magic Approach Sunglasses when you enter the bar, or browse the supermarket, or you’re at the gym, and just like an X-ray, the Anti-Rejection glasses would tell you exactly who is going to be interested in you and who isn’t. Wouldn’t that be great? You would know exactly who to approach. You would never ever get rejected again. Wouldn’t that solve all your problems putting yourself out there trying to make a connection and meeting women?

But the fact is glasses like that don’t exist. In fact, it’s actually quite a scary thought if they did. Men everywhere would be running rampant like the lock to the chimpanzee cage just got cracked.

So many guys have this fear of the unknown, fear of getting rejected, fear of putting themselves out there and getting shot down. So many guys think their entire manhood is on the line if they get blown out and the woman he wants to talk to decides she doesn’t want to talk to him. “What if I approach her and she doesn’t like me? What if I get rejected? She’s really cute and I don’t want to look like a fool.”

But guess what? You’ll never know unless you try. There’s no such thing as Anti-Rejection Sunglasses, and yes, every woman will not be interested in you all of the time. That’s life. But there are plenty of great single women out there who WILL be interested in you. It’s up to you to put yourself out there and find them.

You’ll never find out if she’s interested in you unless you drop the games, stop trying to act cool and standoffish, and just be open and receptive and introduce yourself without putting on a front.

I understand the games. The games are there for a reason. You tiptoe around, you pretend not to be interested in her, so that way if you find out that she’s not interested in you—well, you never had to put yourself out there now you don’t look foolish.

But that’s not going to get you the girl you want. To really grow, to radiate confidence, to be with the kind of woman you really desire, the fact is you have to make yourself vulnerable. You have to drop the games and the gimmicks. You have to go out and approach women even if you don’t know what the outcome is going to be. And yes, you have to experience rejection.

You’ll never know unless you try, and that’s the hardest part. But it’s also the best part. Because when you do approach, and you are successful, and you do get the digits, or the date, or the lay, or the girlfriend, or whatever, you’ll know that you had the guts to approach her just the way you are, without any silly games—and without any Anti-Rejection Specs telling you every time it was safe to approach.

Do you ever say to yourself, “Man I’d really love to go talk to that woman I’m really attracted to over there, but I just can’t do it?” If you’re a woman, do you hear dating advice telling you that you need to be more of a huntress with men and think “I can’t do that?”

A lot of women aren’t hunters at all. They don’t even know how to hunt.

In reality, women can actually be not always so much hunters but baiters — if you know how to lay the bait. The real hunter – the man you’re most attracted to — will actually pick up on that and start talking to you. He’ll pick up on your energy and who you are if you know how to lay the bait.

A lot of the times women don’t understand that this is really just a version of being a female hunter. You’ve got to lay the bait. You can’t just sit back and wait.

The people who sit back in life are the same people who say they can’t do things. Also, by using terminology like “I can’t,” what you are doing is telling yourself that you don’t believe you can do it.

“I can’t” is really just a fear. That’s all it is — “I can’t” is a fear. When you say you can’t do something, it really means that you fear doing it. So you allow fear to basically overcome you and control you.

Fear is such an incredible emotion, but fear it is really a man-made one. Think about it.

You see someone to whom you are attracted, and you tell yourself you can’t go approach them and list all the excuses why you can’t do it. I’m sure they are all fantastic excuses. I’m sure they’re great.

I’m sure you use them a thousand times so that they are extremely well thought out and you actually believe them. That doesn’t change the fact, however, that they are still just excuses.

I see through people’s excuses all the time. I see excuses every day. I have my own excuses and fears I deal with just like everyone else. They key is to deal with them — not to avoid them by saying “I can’t.”

So the term “I can’t” doesn’t exist. This is especially true for you women out there who don’t understand the power of being the female hunter . . . but I’ll talk more about that another day.

This woman is beautiful. She is everything you think you want.

You see her take a sip of her drink, play with the straw, look at her watch and check her cell phone. She looks around the room and, for just a split second, your eyes meet and you have a moment. Then she quickly looks down, and looks back at her phone again.

There you are, standing there alone at the bar with your hands in your pocket waiting for you friends. Apparently she is also waiting for her friends.

Your mind starts racing. You start thinking to yourself, “What can I say? What can I do?”

There are so many clues in this situation! She checked her watch. She checked her phone. Obviously she is waiting for her friends.

It is very easy to walk over there, look at her and say, “Obviously you are waiting for your friends. My friends are late too.” You could start chatting with her.

The problem is that your mind starts messing with you. You don’t see the obvious or, even if you did, you start to freak out the second she looks at you.

You start to ask all those questions in your head like “What can I say” and “How can I get this amazing woman’s attention?” Listen, though, to what you are saying.

You already have her attention. She already looked over at you.

It is because you are afraid and overcomplicate things so much that you don’t see the obvious signs in life. You don’t even see the wonder of this moment. You don’t even realize what a powerful moment this can be because you over-analyze things so much.

You have such a fear of embracing the unknown, that this is what is going to happen to you in this scenario: You are going to stay standing where you are and another guy is going to walk up and start talking to her.

Then her friends are going to arrive, and you are going to watch she and her friends get into a great conversation with him and his friends. When you go home, you are going to wonder what you could have done.

The truth is that you already know what you could have done. It is just your fear of the unknown that doesn’t allow you to do it.

Every day you need to face the unknown. Every day you need to push yourself to do something of which you are afraid.

Otherwise, the unknown will continue to scare you and you will end up dating women who don’t intrigue you and to whom you are not attracted. There is nothing worse than having sex with a woman who doesn’t intrigue you.

You also don’t want to ever end up in a relationship with a woman who doesn’t intrigue you. Fear of the unknown is what drives us to loneliness.

I talk more about how to approach women in any situation without feeling any of this kind of fear or anxiety. CLICK HERE to check this out now.

You guys have labeled all these things in so many different and creative ways, from monkey chatter to approach anxiety. I mean, if you Google “fear,” it is amazing how many different versions of it will pop up in the search results.

What I am about to share with you in today’s podcast is going to blow you away. I know that every week I tell you that the podcast is the most powerful one ever, but that is because every week I come up with something more powerful than the week before.

In this podcast, I am going to tell you why there are only two emotions in this world: one is love and the other is fear. Hate is fear. Approach anxiety is fear.

Love and fear really are the only two emotions, and in this podcast I explain to you how to really embrace loving everything and fearing nothing. Click here to listen now:

Also, if you want to learn how to truly embrace love in your life and also how to truly erase fear, then you need to check out my Men’s “What’s Your Excuse?” and my Women’s “No Excuses” programs.

You go to a job. You date someone to whom you are not attracted. You may not even like your dog. Whatever it may be, how many of you can’t speak about your life with passion?

If you can’t, do you know why you can’t? It is because you are really not in love with who you are.

Passion comes from within. People who speak with passion, speak from power that comes from within themselves. Meaning, they love everything about themselves.

They’ve accepted their insecurities. They’ve accepted their fears. They’ve accepted all these things about themselves, and they have embraced themselves.

Today’s podcast is going to teach you how to speak from a place of true passion and how to live a passionate life. This is a “must listen” to podcast. It’s that important and that big.

I can’t even adequately express in writing what I want to tell all of you. You need to hear me talk about it in today’s podcast. So I’m just going to stop my fingers from typing on the computer right now, and I’m going to give you the link for the podcast so you can listen to it right now.

Click here to listen:

If you want to learn about my personal journey to self-love, and how to go on that journey for yourself, be sure to check out my “Self-Love” Audios which are part of my Men’s “What’s Your Excuse?” and Women’s “No Excuses” programs.

If you expect nothing from people, then you will accept every gift that they give you – the gift of themselves, and the gift of sharing with you.

Life is just a series of continual conversations. Whenever you meet somebody you connect with and find interesting, you want to continue that conversation with them, right?

So what do you do? You ask them out as a conversation continuance: “oh my god, it was so great to talk to you about your dog and this trip you just got back from. Hey, I want give you a call and learn more – give me your number.”

It’s just a continual theme. That theme is connecting – and you can maintain that continual connection that you have together in that moment of time.

Many guys will go into salesman-mode when they see a woman that they are attracted to; they will just try to sell themselves. “Buy me, please!” They continue to talk AT them rather than with them.

But you all know what a real connection feels like. If you’re talking to a woman and you’re both with groups of people and her eyes can’t stop looking at you – that’s a connection. If she’s directing all of her energy towards you, you know what that feels like.

So if you’re just going out there to practice conversation and listening skills, just talk to people all day long – that’s important to do. But if you’re looking for a real connection, you want to weed through as quickly as possible.

These are the two steps: the first is to go out and talk to people and build your conversation skills, the second is to look for that connection.

Todays video is all about how to create a more powerful version of you!!

Its awesome when I see someone transform and really break through their fears.

Today’s blog is something we go over in all the bootcamps.

Also check out the bootcamp schedule on the home page. Only 3 more left this year!

I’m all about creating positive energy wherever I go, because to me, life is a party. If you’re not going to go out there and enjoy every single moment of every single day, then you are just wasting your time.

You should never be waiting to talk to the hot girl – you should talk to everybody. For women it’s the same thing – if you wait to do that, then you’re no different than the bad pinch hitter.

You know, there’s always that guy – the Cubs have one, the Mets have one – where the bases are loaded, it’s the bottom of the 14th and he’s the last guy on the bench, right? And you’re thinking, oh, man, what the hell? Why is he up?

Or it’s like the third-string quarterback. If you’re a Bears fan, all you have is third-string quarterbacks. That team has gone from being good to being bad again so quickly – it’s unbelievable how quickly they went from the Superbowl to being 4-12. I just cannot get over that.

Anyway, let’s go back to this experience we had today in my friend Barry’s clothing store in Brentwood, why I talked to this certain person and how.

When I walk into a store, I’m observing everything. Today, a man walked in with his two little daughters. I started talking to the little girls. I said, “are you picking out clothes for daddy today?” They answered, “oh yes, we are.”

Then Rey picked up on that and he found out from the guy that his daughters were getting him a birthday present. He told Rey that it was his 40th birthday. It’s all about gathering information.

What is this good for? Well, first off, if you’re interested in people, others can tell that about you. When you go into the store, and you’re chatting with other people, other customers will walk in and observe this banter going back and forth. And they will become instantly attracted to you and want to participate in the conversation as well. You become attractive because you are leading the conversation.

And you never know who is going to come in while you are putting on this show. A beautiful woman might come into the store, and if she sees this going on – she sees the daughters talking to you, the father talking to you – she wants in.

Everyone wants in. People walk around with sticks up their asses all day long and they are attracted to people with good energy. That’s the first thing about it.

The second thing about talking to everyone is that it gives you the opportunity to build up your social network. You’ll always run into people over and over again.

You might be out at a sushi restaurant in Chicago or LA, and there’s the guy that you saw in the store. It was his birthday, he was there with his daughters, you remember these things about him, and now he’s sitting there with his wife and her HOT friend.

You walk over and say, “oh hey man, I remember you from when you were shopping with your daughters for your birthday. How’d that day go?” That’s it. You remember everything. That’s the reasoning behind talking to everyone.

I go over all of this and much more in my Mens Mastery Series. Click here for more details.

Todays video is a secret hidden place to meet women.

One of the things we will be going over is rejection and how to overcome the fear of approaching. Here is a quick mindset tip for all of you to use this weekend.

Have a great Friday!!

David: Did you see me on the front page of the LA Times today? If you didn’t, too bad – you really would have been amazed at the article.

There was a big picture of me on the front page, and then this article about how I had approached some woman in Coffee Bean or something, and totally got rejected. On the front page! It’s unbelievable.

Just last week I was on the cover of People – I’m not sure where it was I was rejected last week – where was it that I was rejected and made the cover of People magazine? God, I don’t even remember.

And did you see that annoying supermarket flyer that comes in your mailbox? Did you see the one from Whole Foods this week? There’s a big picture of me, getting rejected on aisle seven. I can’t believe they actually took a picture of that!

Client: Alright, I hear what you are saying. But it’s kind of awkward if you run into them again or the people that were around, you know?

David: No. That’s the mindset. You’re NOT front page news. Nobody gives a shit and no one even noticed.

Like the guy next to us in Whole Foods just now? He knew I was flirting with the woman in front of me and he didn’t give a shit. He’s not going to say, “so you know that tall guy that comes in a lot and always orders food? Aw, he got rejected so badly today!” He’ll just look at me and think, at least this guy had the fucking balls to talk to her! He’s not even going to remember.

People are caught up in their own lives, so they are not going to remember that you got the heave-ho next to the salad bar.

Rey: How much you care about them is exactly how much they care about you.

Client: I don’t give a shit about them.

David: Exactly, and they feel the same way about you.

You see people get rejected all the time. When you go out at night, how many guys do you see get flamed?

And then when you go to bed at night, you’re not thinking about them getting rejected, you’re thinking about your own rejections!

So do you get the whole mindset about it? Your rejections are never going to be front page news!
Todays video is all about how to get a deeper understanding of how women think.

Today we learn all about why they do not approach guys.

To learn more about the way women think check out my Girls Tell All audio series.