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Posts Tagged ‘david wygant’ |
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Friday, July 2nd, 2010
How do these things make you feel? How do you feel if someone cheats on you? How do you feel if someone steals your cell phone out of your car? How do you feel if someone slept with somebody else?
We’re getting to the real root of cheaters right now. You’ve been cheated on in the past.
If someone asks you what happened in your past relationship, is your answer something like this: “She was a great girl, but all of a sudden something happened and she started cheating on me. It was ridiculous. I don’t understand why she cheated on me. I did everything for her.”
Immediately, the person you’re saying this to is going to look at you and wonder what made that person cheat on you. When you’re cheated on, it means that there is something that’s not working between the two of you of which you are not aware.
To tell you the truth, I’ve never been cheated on, but I have cheated one time. I know exactly why I cheated on them. It was because the communication in our relationship was dead, over, done. I wasn’t happy anymore.
So if you tell someone on a first, second or third date that you’ve been cheated on, they’re going to really wonder about you. They are going to wonder why you didn’t realize why you were cheated on, and why you aren’t taking responsibility for your part in it.
A lot of people don’t understand that cheating is a two-way street. In order to push someone out the door to cheat, you must be pushing them one way or another.
There’s something that you’ve been doing in that situation. Maybe you were not aware of the person’s needs, wants, and desires. Maybe you wanted more out of the relationship than they did. It could be a number of different things.
So if you’ve been cheated on and someone asks you why that relationship ended, just say “It ended mutually” and leave it at that. As you get to know someone better, you can uncover the depth of your last relationships.
In the first couple of weeks, though, people are judging and looking and evaluating you. It’s not that you want to hide things, but you just want to get to know each other on a fresh face.
You don’t need to tell every negative detail of your past. You don’t need to dump everything about each other in the first few weeks. You want those first few weeks to really bond with each other, to build up the trust, so then you can talk about all that stuff later when you’re in a safe space with each other.
People are still judging in those first few weeks. So the next time someone asks you if you’ve ever been cheated on, just say “You know what? I have been, but it’s no big deal. I learned a lot from that. I really learned that my communication in that relationship wasn’t good and I take full responsibility for it.”
Take the high road in everything. Anytime you take the road of a victim, it means that you don’t know how to communicate properly with anybody else.
Popularity: 5%
Tags: advice, cheated on, cheaters, cheating, Date, dating, david wygant, past relationships, talking about past relationships, tips
Posted in Breakups, Divorce, How To Be A Better Communicator, How To Start A Relationship, Marriage, Rejection, Relationships | 11 Comments »
Thursday, July 1st, 2010
In a time far far away in a time when things were more mellow.
A woman by the name of Helene Wygant gave birth to this lucky fellow.
Today this fellow is celebrating that once a year ritual called post pardum day or in laymens terms a birthday.
I recorded something very personal for all of you today!
Popularity: 7%
Tags: birthday, childbirth, david wygant, july 1
Posted in Dave's Faves, How To Be A Better Communicator, Love, Mindset, Relationships | 25 Comments »
Wednesday, June 30th, 2010
I get asked a lot about how to “properly” break up with someone. Breaking up is really a hard thing to do. I’ve written about this in the past, but I keep getting this question. So maybe I should tackle this subject again.
Breaking up is tough. You could do it like Sylvester Stallone and break up with someone via FedEx.
You can also can sit someone down, look them in the eyes and be 100% honest with about how you feel. You can tell the person exactly how you feel about them — that you love them as a person but that you no longer romantically feeling them anymore. You can tell them that you’re great as friends but not great as lovers.
Honesty is really, really hard for certain people. By being honest, though, you are allowing someone not to live with any doubt or questions, and it allows them to move on. It will of course hurt in that moment, but then that person can start healing and move forward.
Too many people don’t allow someone to heal. By being honest with someone when breaking up, though, you are allowing them to start healing.
So share with me today some of the toughest times you had breaking up with people. I’d love to hear from you guys.
Popularity: 3%
Tags: advice, breaking up, breakup, Date, dating, david wygant, how to break up, relationship advice, Relationships, tips
Posted in Breakups | 12 Comments »
Tuesday, June 29th, 2010
I’m a firm believer that whoever asks someone out on a date, should pay for that date. If you’re a woman and you ask a guy out on a date, then you pay for that date.
It’s 2010. Pay for the date. You asked him out. He didn’t ask you out, so he doesn’t need to pay.
Now I’m sure that there are women reading this right now thinking, “Wait a second. Men are always supposed to pay for the first date.” Yes they are — if they do the asking.
If you’re a man and you ask a woman out — you tell her where to meet you or you tell her where you’re going — then you better for the date. You better pay for the full date.
That does not mean that you pay for dinner and have her leave the tip. That does not mean that you buy the drinks and she pays for dinner.
When you ask someone out, then you had better be prepared to pay for that date. If you can’t afford where you’re taking them, find another place.
Always date within your budget. That’s so important. So many people try to impress someone with a date they cannot afford.
Then when it comes down to the end of the date, the woman is getting her car from the valet and you leave her to pay for it. This guys, is also part of what you should be paying for if you are paying for the date. If you don’t, she will think that you’re cheap for not paying for the whole date.
The bottom line is that when you ask someone out, you are responsible for paying for that date, including all the activities that go on that evening. It’s that simple. It really is.
Popularity: 4%
Tags: advice, Date, dating, dating etiquette, david wygant, first date, first dates, paying for a date, tips
Posted in College Dating, Dating Etiquette, High School Dating | 14 Comments »
Monday, June 28th, 2010
Are you a person of your word? Are you someone who keeps their word?
When you say you are going to do something, do you actually follow through and do it? When you say you’re going to meet somebody, do you actually meet them at the time you stated you were going to meet them? When you’re going to do a favor for somebody, do you do that favor or does the person have to ask you to do it over and over again?
Living life with integrity means actually committing to the things you say and to the actions that you promise. Nothing irritates me more than when someone tells me they are going to do something, and then I have to hound them to get it done.
It’s annoying to have to ask someone five or six times before they will do what they said they would do. This is especially true in professional or business situation.
In business, if you have to ask someone somebody five or six times to do something, then it means that person is really not a good worker and doesn’t take pride in their work. Even in a personal setting, you should never have to ask a friend to something several times before they will do it. The same thing is true in a relationship.
Become somebody who commits to your word, and other people with really respect you so much more. Even more importantly, be a person of your word so that you can respect yourself.
Popularity: 3%
Tags: a person of your word, advice, david wygant, follow through, follow up, how to be successful, keep your word, success, tips
Posted in Life Style 101, Money & Success | 20 Comments »
Saturday, June 26th, 2010
One thing you notice when you get to the breakup point is that you actually fight less with your partner. You fight less because in your mind and in your heart you start detaching yourself from the other person, and you don’t care as much anymore.
You have already made a determination that they don’t understand you, that they will never understand you and that the relationship just won’t work out with them. So, all of a sudden, the incredible anger that were starting fights decrease.
 You start walking away from them. You used to feel like she was busting your balls or like he was riding you and not understanding you. Now the minute you get into a fight, you just walk away from it.
The fact that you are on opposite sides of the bed, which used to bother you and keep you up at night, turns into the natural way things are and you are able to sleep with no problem. You go to your side of the bed, they go to theirs, and you both just go to sleep.
You are not up for four hours every night thinking, wondering, feeling and missing them. You just want to go to sleep.
When it hits this point, i.e., when it hits the breakup point, then you need to face the business of breaking up. You know breaking up sucks, but there is only one good way to do it.
When you think you might have hit that breakup point, you must tell the person that you’re disconnecting from them. You need to be honest and raw.
If you don’t think the relationship is going to work or you know you’ve already disconnected based on how things have been going, then you might want to consider walking away for a week. Spend a week without that person.
Go visit some friends or family. Really think about what life would be like without that person. How would you feel without them being there?
When you’re in the thick of things, they never seem to be able to work out. So take a break. Take a walk. Take a week long walk.
Take that week to ask yourself some questions. What does your life look like without them? Do you like and enjoy the way it feels?
Then, after you’ve taken this time, go back and either take a stand for the relationship or break up. Whichever decision you make, you need to be honest with yourself.
Life is too short! There are a lot of wonderful, amazing people out there whom you can meet.
When you take this time to think, be sure to think about what it was like when you first met this person. How did you feel about them before things got so frustrating? Did you feel like they were your soulmate and the two of you were meant to be? You’ve got to dial back into that.
A friend of mine said to me one time, “Pretend you just got amnesia and all of a sudden someone told you the person with whom you are living (or in a relationship) is the person you are going to marry. You would have none of the bad feelings and none of the fights. What would you do in that situation?” What you would do in that situation is try to get to know that person again without all the anger, fights, frustration and history getting in the way.
So maybe take a week to yourself and then a week with that person. Get to know them again and remember the reasons why you fell in love. If you guys can do that, then you might be able to save your relationship.
Popularity: 5%
Tags: advice, breaking up, breakup, Breakups, Dating Advice, david wygant, divorce, fiance, fighting with partner, marriage advice, partner, relationship advice, roommate, separation, should you breakup, signs of a breakup, spouse, tips, when to breakup
Posted in Breakups, Divorce, Love, Marriage, Rejection, Relationships | 8 Comments »
Thursday, June 24th, 2010
Go ahead, I dare you. Ask me if I care.
The other day, I was walking down the street with Sonja. This guy came up to us and said, “Do you like poetry?” I looked at him and said, “No.”
I just didn’t feel like being hassled. Whenever I’m walking down the street, I’m walking down the street to get somewhere — maybe to get some food or to go to a shop. I might just be walking the dog, but I’m usually going somewhere.
I don’t like being harassed when I go somewhere. I hate being asked for money. I think it’s crazy.
I hate these guys who want to play music for you. I know they’re trying to hustle, but I’m just not in the mood to be hustled.
This brings me to my point for this blog, which both men and women need to understand.
Every man I’ve ever coached wants to know how to meet women on the street. They want to know, “How can I stop her when she’s walking? How can I stop her on the street and meet her?”
What I say to the guys who ask me this is always the same thing: How do you feel when people stop you on the street? It’s irritating.
Now, if someone tries to casually talk to me when I’m window shopping at a store, I might engage in conversation and I might not. To be stopped when I’m briskly walking down the street to get to a destination, however, is annoying.
It’s just like the man today who asked us if we like poetry. That was annoying.
To all the guys who are just so obsessed with meeting women on the street, why don’t you just stop a woman and say, “Excuse me, do you like to be picked up while you’re running down the street?” There are so many people to meet. Don’t bother people when they’re walking.
You can smile. You can say hello. If they respond, maybe a conversation could ensue. Otherwise, most of us are just going to a destination.
When we get to that destination we’re relaxed. We’re happy. We’re in a better place to probably communicate and talk.
Popularity: 9%
Tags: advice, approach women, Date, dating, david wygant, Day Game, how to approach women, PickUp, pua, street approach, tips
Posted in Attract and Approach Women, College Dating, Dating Etiquette, Day Game, High School Dating, How To Ask For A Date, How To Be A Better Communicator | 17 Comments »
Wednesday, June 23rd, 2010
Are you cheap?
I want to talk about who should pay for the first date, and what the perceptions are about this.
If you actually allow women to split the bill on a first date, then you need to listen up and listen carefully to today’s podcast.
What I am going to tell you in this podcast can be the difference between an okay and an amazing dating life for you!
Click here to listen now:
Click Here To Download The Podcast!
Popularity: 10%
Tags: advice, cheap, cheapskate, Date, dating, Dating Advice, dating etiquette, david wygant, penny pinching, podcast, tips, who should pay for a date
Posted in College Dating, Dating Etiquette | 32 Comments »
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