Women don’t rip us apart like we rip them apart.

You’re sitting a pool with a bunch of guys in South Beach, Florida.  A woman walks by in a bikini.

“She’d be pretty hot if she just lost a few pounds.”

“Her jugs—yes!”

“Naw man, check out her cellulite.”

Meanwhile…

You’re sitting there with your man belly hanging over your Speedo—oops, not your Speedo, but your “board shorts”.

You’re sitting there eating popcorn shrimp and French fries.  Your chest is about as flat as a 14-year-old girl that hasn’t hit puberty yet.

Not to mention you’re 5’6″ in heels, and maybe 140 pounds dripping wet.

Women don’t see size like you see cellulite and her 10 extra pounds, or the roots in her hair.

Women seek confidence.

I’ve got a client––5’5″.  He calls himself Napoleon because he’s the little dictator.

He gets laid more than anybody I’ve ever met in my entire life.  Tall women, short women, old women, young women, blonde women, Asian women, it doesn’t make a difference.

He’s got, what I call, the Napoleon Syndrome—it’s the more positive side to the short-man complex.

It’s not about how tall you are, it’s about how you use every inch of your body as a strength.  Here’s the deal: Women don’t know what they want until it’s standing right in front of them.

We look at things from man’s point of view; I call it man’s world.

Man’s world is this: each man can describe exactly what they’re looking for in a woman to the T—5’3″, blonde, 114 pounds, with a C-Cup, and firm calves.

She must be this, she must be that—we’re very physical.

So in turn, because of our obsession with the physical, we think that women must be obsessed the same exact way.

How many times have you seen a guy bald with a pot belly walking around with a beautiful woman?  How many times have you seen a short guy walking around with a beautiful woman?

That could be you.

The reason why it’s not you is because you don’t understand how to use your height to your advantage.  Because there’s one thing women are attracted to every single time: confidence.

A guy could be 6’2″ and chiseled, but have no confidence—he isn’t going to get laid.

A guy could be 5’6″ competing with the 6’2″ Adonis, and he could be full of confidence, wit, and personality, with no fear when he talks to her, and guess who’s going home with that girl that night?

The 5’6″ guy.

My roommate in college was named Mark Behar.  He was short, fat, bald, and Jewish, even when he was 18.  A couple of years ago I went out with him in the city. We went to this restaurant on Park Avenue.

The waitress came over and gushed over me.  He’s seen it 1,000 times before.

So he said, “Excuse me, are you just the typical woman who goes for the tall, good looking guy.  You don’t even know what he’s all about.”

She started giggling.

He then looked at her and said, “Have you ever been with a short, fat, bald Jewish guy?  I bet you haven’t.  You’re so typical; you never broaden your horizons.  You’ve had the same relationships over and over with the tall, good-looking guy.  Good for you. What a limiting mindset and belief you have.

Go.  I want a hamburger.  Go get me a hamburger with some fries.”

She came back about 10 minutes later with the drinks.

He looked at her and again said, “Have you thought about it or are you going to continue to gush over my friend?  Because let me tell you, you’ve never slept with a short, fat, bald Jewish guy and until you do you’ll never understand the power of what we possess over you.

How are my fries and burger doing? Go get it.”

She came back with the fries and burger with a little giggle on her face.

I no longer was getting the attention; I got the first two rounds.

“You’ve switched positions now haven’t you?  You’ve got to admit, you’re intrigued, aren’t you.  You wonder what it’s like to be with a short, fat, bald, Jewish guy aren’t you?”

She giggled and laughed some more.

“By the way, can you get me some broccoli too?  I want some veggies to go with my fries.  Go. Leave.”

At the end of the meal, she’s gushing over him now, wondering who he is, what he’s all about.

He’s literally eight inches shorter than me, bald as can be, with a belly; if we stood there and were judged as purely physical specimens, I would win every single time.

But at the end of the meal, guess whom she was ogling?  Him.

He planted the seed and that’s all you can do.

It’s about believing in yourself and calling her out on her bullshit.

Watch what happens.

I bet it would surprise you.

Now it’s been a while since I wrote anything about bars and clubs.  To be honest, it’s been a while since I’ve been out to any clubs.  But I’m going to be out on the town this weekend with some friends, so I figured I’ll put you guys in the right mindset with a question that comes from an email I got last week:

Hey Shogo,

Thanks so much for the coaching call yesterday, I got some great advice out of it and can’t wait to put it to use.  One question.  Could you help me out with cock blocks in a bar or club, they can be very annoying and ignorant I find and I’ve been cockblocked now and again.  So what could ya say to the guy to stop?

J, Ireland

Hey J,

Here’s how I feel about cock blocking.  I never get cock blocked.  It just doesn’t happen to me. So what that means is that cock blocking has nothing to do with another guy being an asshole, swooping in and taking “your” woman.  It’s got everything to do with YOU.  You can learn all the quick and witty comeback lines and banter you want to be prepared for a so-called cock block, but it’s not going to stop it from happening to you.

Because cock blocking only happens to certain types of guys.  And it happens to them over and over again.

Guys who are very hesitant about expressing themselves to a woman.  Guys who don’t claim their space.  Guys who keep their distance and are afraid to get close out of fear that he’s offending her or coming across as “giving her the wrong idea”.

When you do that, other guys will notice it and see that there is no chemistry there.  Maybe you just look like friends.  Maybe a guy is an asshole, and sees an opportunity there to come in and take her away.  In any case, she’s clear for the taking to any other swinging dick who walks by.

Cock blocking happens to guys who don’t intrigue women.  If she is interested in you and the conversation you are having, she will stand there and listen to everything you have to say.  When she’s not into you, her eyes will start darting across the room, hoping for her friend or some other more interesting guy to come rescue her.

When that starts happening, you’re done. Nothing can save you.  She’ll pray for someone else to come join the conversation.  She’ll be totally open to starting a conversation and flirting with another guy who’s around her.  And a guy who sees that will jump right in.  Sometimes she’ll start a conversation with another guy.  I can’t tell you how many times I’ve gone up to the bar to get a drink, and a girl standing there will turn and start talking to me while another guy was just in mid-conversation with her.

Then I’d look over her at the poor guy’s disillusioned face and give him a little shrug.  Does that make me a cock-block?  Does that make me an asshole?  No.  It means she was bored to death with the other guy and wanted talk to me instead.  It means the other guy needed some coaching—not on how to deal with cock blocks, but on how to keep her intrigued.  Because I’m no better than the guy who just got shoved out of the picture.  But I’m much better in conversation.

Cock blocking happens to guys who don’t claim their own space and walk over with confidence and start great conversations with women everywhere they go.  Cockblocking happens to guys who talk to one or two women a night, and then CLING onto those conversations like their lives depended on it.

Sound familiar, victim of cock blocking?

You sit in the corner of the bar, waiting for what to say to that one girl you’ve been looking at for the past 45 minutes, then you finally get up the guts to approach her and hope it really works out because this is your one shot for the night.

Instead you try and try and try with that one girl you finally approached, even when there’s no chemistry.  And the more you try with a girl who’s only lukewarm about you, the longer you stand there struggling, the more likely some guy with dimples and a great smile is going to wink at her and jump in to the rescue.

So you’re still asking why you need to start conversations with women everywhere?  This is why.  Because when you start doing that, you will start having an abundance mindset.  You’ll start approaching women everywhere.  When I go out, I talk to girls everywhere.  Quick, 30-second conversations.  If there’s no chemistry, if she doesn’t want to talk to me, I move on.  I don’t stand around in a shitty conversation, struggling to make things happen, and wait to be cock blocked by some guy she likes better than me.

You think you’ve been cock blocked, but you really just cock blocked yourself.

My answer? It’s really easy.

For one thing, walk into every place you enter as if you own the place. Don’t run or rush into the room. Don’t immediately go to the part of the room that is your “destination.”

Look around. Start acknowledging people.

Have you ever watched someone who is running for President? As they walk through any room, they look at every single person. They shake people’s hands.

So when you walk in a room, you need to walk up to all the people you know first, shake their hands with a hello or give them a big hug, and then talk to them and bond with them. What happens when you do this is that other people (especially women) will look at you and wonder who you are. They will wonder who this person is who is commanding so much attention from other people.

They will wonder about you because everyone is attracted to that person who commands attention from everyone else. You can do this anywhere; it’s not just for when you’re walking into a bar or a party.

You can do this at the supermarket by getting to know the person who chops the meet, by getting to know the person who runs produce, and by getting to know the person behind the cash register. Right there you have three people now that you can basically smile at, talk to and with whom you can laugh. You have three people with whom you can lead that attractive lifestyle.

So the next time you’re heading to the supermarket and you’re dreading going there and talking to people, you can go there and just talk to those people there you already know. When you do that, then all of a sudden other people notice it and will immediately wonder who you are.

They will wonder who this person is who is commanding so much respect and attention from everyone else? People will then start walking toward you and smiling at you. If you decide to converse with them, then they have already noticed you and are looking forward to their five minutes with you.

Something I tell people all the time is to always give everyone the best 30 seconds to one minute of you that you possible can before you walk away. Ask someone how they are doing. Listen intently and really take them in. Then the next time they see you, you will be able to have a longer conversation.

Having an attractive lifestyle also means going out and doing things that you like to do. What do you enjoy doing? If you don’t enjoy being in a bar, you’re never going to be attractive in a bar.

If you enjoy going to a market and shopping, though, you are always going to know how to talk to someone there. You’re going to have an interest in things about that place and you will have things in common with people who go there.

Do you like film? Go to movie premieres. Talk to people about the movie — the theme or about the actors.

So make a list of the five things you most love to do, and do them with a passion. When you do that, you will be very attractive and create passion in others.

In reality, what is going on in that situation is that your penis is talking to you. It is saying, “Hey, Mr. Big Head up there. Yeah, you between the shoulders. Mr. Penis here. Listen, man, I think this girl is really hot and really want to get into her. So try not to f^*k it up this time. Please don’t say the wrong thing, because I really want to hit that vagina tonight. Please don’t f^*k it up and say that stupid thing you said last time you approached a woman. Play it safe this time.”

This is what your penis is doing. Your penis is controlling your head. If it wasn’t, then your head would be thinking “I’m a cool guy. Man, I’m awesome. I’m great. There is a pretty girl over there, but who cares? There are tons of pretty girls in the world. I’m just looking for the one I can really connect with who really gets me. Let me go over and talk to her and see what she’s all about. Let’s see if I even like her at all. I’ll ask her out for a cup of coffee and get to know her a little bit.”

That is what the rational mind would be saying. The problem, however, is that we are so driven by what’s inside our pants. We are so driven by Mr. Penis. Since Mr. Penis doesn’t understand anything rational, he gives his power away every single time.

So the next time you see a good-looking woman, stop looking for validation. Stop listening to Mr. Penis. When you do that, you will realize that you are an amazing person.

This is exactly what I did so that my penis never controlled how successful my approaches were. CLICK HERE to listen to me go through it step-by-step.

80% of the way we communicate really is by body language. If you watch a movie, when the actors deliver their lines they also have to deliver the right body language. Otherwise, you don’t believe the words that are coming out of their mouth.

I can’t tell you how many times I have witnesses men walking over to women with their shoulders rolled forward, looking down at the ground, and muttering their words. When they do that, women respond with the exact same body language.

When her body language is leaning towards the door, she is telling you how uncomfortable she is even if she is interested. So sometimes body language can seem to conflict with how that person actually feels.

That is why the guys need to keep talking smiling and staying relaxed. That way, you will help her relax. People will follow your body language when you are in control of yourself.

Your body language, though, is so important. You don’t want to come across as needy, desperate, weird, or too intense. You want to come across as somebody who’s confident, secure, and self-aware.

A confident man walks with his shoulders back, his head up, and his eyes directly on the person to whom he is talking. A confident man walks slow but strong. A confident man walks into a room, looks around, decides who he wants to talk to before walking over there.

A confident man faces the person with whom he’s speaking. A confident man does not look down at the ground. A confident man does not roll his shoulders down.

Your body language is so important. It’s not just about what you say, it’s how you say it and how your body is standing.

When you’re on a date facing somebody and talking to them at a table, you want to face them directly. You want to show them that you’re a strong, confident man.

There is so much more about body language that we need to discuss.

But before we do, let me ask you a question.

Are you nervous when approaching a woman? Don’t know how to approach, stand, act, look, etc? If so, lets keep this conversation rolling by Clicking Here!

How would you feel if you were the president of your local coffee shop or of your local Whole Foods?

Imagine being able to walk into any bar or being able to go into any party, and you are the person that everybody wants to get to know . . . all before you even utter a word.

If all of this sounds good to you, then today’s podcast is all about you.

You need to listen to me and my coach Adam from London as we walk you through a very emotional journey.

We will show you how to command attention wherever you go.

You’ll know exactly how to turn on that charm and charisma in every situation, and before you even speak to anybody.

That’s all I’m going to say about it. See you guys on the podcast!

Listen live now:

Click Here To Download The Podcast!

The only people in your life who should prompt change in you are your close friends and family. Feedback should only be listened to in retrospect, and only from people you love and trust.

Strangers know nothing about who you really are. So when they pass judgment on you, they are doing so based on nothing but superficial things.

Think about this the next time you care about what a stranger things about you. Ask yourself, “On what are they basing their opinion, and since they don’t know me why do I even care?”

So many of us spend so much time really just obsessed with other people’s opinions of us. Think about how often you do this.

How many times when a person you’ve approached and with whom you flirted didn’t acknowledge you, did you think “God I must be ugly. I must be a loser. What did I do wrong?”

In life, the only people’s opinions you should care about are those that come from people you respect, know, love and trust. Otherwise you end up becoming a human diaper.

Ever time someone shits on you, you’re going to need to change. That is what a human diaper is: somebody who needs to be changed every day.

“Oh my God, that stranger on the subway didn’t like me. I need to change.” “Oh my God, that person said something mean to me. I need to change.” You’ll be changing your diaper so much, people will start to call you Pampers.

You don’t want to be a human diaper. You want to be someone who respects themselves, and only has a small circle of people whose opinions you respect. The truth is that the only person who can change you, and who should have the power to change or to influence you, is yourself.

Want to never again care about what people think about you? Want to feel the unbelievable sensation of being completely comfortable and confident in your own skin no matter what happens? You deserve to feel this way every single day and to never again bear the burden of the fears you carry around with you now. In my Men’s Mastery Series and Women’s Art of Attracting Men programs, I take you by the hand and guide you step-by-step to this place. Free yourself and grab your ticket to total confidence now!

I want you to write down on a piece of paper the answer to this question: What is your biggest enemy?

When it comes to meeting women, a lot of guys are under the impression that their biggest enemy is timing. They will say that they haven’t met women because they haven’t been invited to the right parties or something similar to that.

This kind of thing is surface stuff, and it is not your biggest enemy. Your biggest enemy is that eight pound thing you carry between your shoulders called your head.

Your head is your biggest enemy because it is what does not allow you to accomplish about 90% of the things in life you want to accomplish. I’m not just talking about meeting women.

When it comes to meeting women, your success comes down to your belief. You must truly believe that you are amazing and are a gift. You must truly believe that any woman who meets you would benefit from your amazing tenderness, your amazing personality, your character traits and everything else about you.

If you don’t truly believe all of this, then it doesn’t matter what you do or what you memorize because you head is disconnected from your heart. When your head is disconnected from your heart, it’s all over.

Have you been in an argument with someone in which your head thinks and over-thinks things so much that you can’t get back into your heart? That will stop whatever constructive dialog you’re having at that point. Your heart and head need to both be involved at all times.

Your head can over-rationalize things. Your head can over-think things.

This is what is going on every time you can’t get yourself to approach a woman. All you are thinking about are the fears and excuses in your head.

What does your heart want to do in this situation though? Your heart wants to go and experience another person. We’re all about experiencing other people – their feelings and emotions. The problem is that our head can play tricks on us.

This does not just happen in the area of meeting women. This happens in relationships and it happens at work.

How many of you had an intent to start the new year really kicking ass at work. Then you get your first rejection and, all of a sudden, you are right back in the same mindset you were in before the new year.

You must get you head aligned. The old saying “get your head on straight” is really important and true. Probably about 90% of the people in the world are walking around with their head on backwards or sideways.

Can you imagine if your head actually could rotate all the way around and how that would feel? You would be walking down the street and would be passing some people with their head facing backwards while others would have their head tilted to the side.

Nobody would walk around with their head on straight except those who truly believe in themselves, and who don’t care about what others think and feel.

I’m not talking about being cold, because of course we all care how others feel. Deep down, however, we all need to maintain a great sense of self. When you’re true to yourself, you’ll be able to do anything you want.

I have a special offer for all of my loyal blog readers. Do you want to meet me in person in March?

If your answer is yes, I say to you … Really?! Come on now.

The fact that you would even compare yourself to anyone else is a sign of emotional immaturity. The only person you need to compare yourself to is yourself.

It doesn’t matter what area of your life or yourself you want to be better. Ask yourself how you were one year ago compared to how you are now.

Have you grown in the last year? What have you learned? How have you progressed? What do you still need to learn, and what are you going to do to get there?

I receive emails all the time in which people will write things like, “David, I’m just not as good as my friends with women. I go out with my friend Bill and he’s so great at meeting women. I just wish I were him.”

Let me tell you something. With that attitude, you’ll never get good at it.

What you should be saying instead in your email to me is this: “God, I went out with my friend Bill the other night and it was so much fun. He’s amazing with women, and I just learned so many things from him and had such a great time! I’m so happy that he has this skill, and I look at him as kind of a role model.”

Never compare yourself to other people. Never look at somebody else and say “I wish I had as much money as my friend Tom,” or “I wish I had as good a marriage as my friend Jimmy.”

Instead, go to your friend Tom and find out how he made all that money. Learn his secrets, so you can incorporate them into your own life. If your friend Jimmy has such a great marriage, then sit down one night with him and his wife and ask them what the secret is to their happy marriage.

You do this so that you can learn from successful people. That is for what successful people are there. Successful people are there so that you can learn from them. They are not there to make you jealous.

If you are jealous of other people, you are never going to learn from them. Jealousy is an ugly emotion. If you’re happy about other people’s success, on the other hand, then you are able to sit down and ask them about how they achieved their success.

Everyone loves to share their journey, and life is all about paying it forward. If you pay it forward, then you are passing good lessons on to someone else.

So, the next time you’re comparing yourself to somebody and you experience those tinges of jealousy, remember this blog. Instead of comparing yourself to them, ask them what they did to make themselves such an expert in the field of women, marriage, money or whatever it might be.

That is what it’s all about. That’s what I’m here to do for you.

How did I get so good? Well I give you everything that I’ve ever done, and show you how I learned and overcame all of my own struggles, on my Community site and in my videos. I share everything that has worked for me.

I just want to continue to enlighten you and help you grow as people. It makes me happy to share my knowledge with all of you.

So take jealousy out of the equation, and put admiration into it. You’ll find life will become a lot easier and a lot more fulfilling.

CLICK HERE to hear me talk more about how I learned to be successful with women, money, my business, fitness and other areas.

It is the one thing that so many people lack that, if they had it, would make their life feel like they are playing in their own version of the Super Bowl every day.

So what is that one essential thing? I’m glad you asked.

Listen to today’s podcast and find out what it is:

I share my story of, and my own personal journey to, achieving real inner confidence and true happiness in a special audio. I also talk about how go on a journey like that in your life. Find out more about hearing that by CLICKING HERE FOR MEN and CLICKING HERE FOR WOMEN